Sarah Colonna Quotes & Sayings

My family likes to make fun of me, indicating that being able to cook is part of what makes a woman a woman. I disagree. Getting my period makes me a woman. Cooking just makes me bored. — Sarah Colonna

I'm somewhere in the middle. I want both. Or I want it all. Or I only want part of both. I don't know. I just know that you don't always end up happy with what you thought would make you happy. You've probably been there a time or two yourself. You can't always get what you want. — Sarah Colonna

If any of you haven't tried going to the movies alone, I suggest you do. It's not like I do it because I'm single; I've gone to the movies alone when I'm in a relationship, too. It's just a nice escape, time to zone out. Plus, nobody talks to you during the film, nobody puts their grubby hands in your popcorn, and nobody judges you for bringing in airplane bottles of vodka to spike your lemonade with. — Sarah Colonna

I'm thirty-six years old, but I don't feel like it. Some days I feel like I'm twenty-one, some days I feel like I'm pushing sixty. — Sarah Colonna

I guess just like relationships, friends can outgrow each other. — Sarah Colonna

The words "how are you?" can pack a mean punch. — Sarah Colonna

I loved someone so much that I broke up with him because I didn't want to get hurt. Then when he proved he loved me back, I broke up with him again. I'm a fucking mess, but so are you. Most of us are. — Sarah Colonna