Michael Buckley Quotes & Sayings

If we have to get married and have a million babies, I hope our relationship will be built on mutual disgust and an endless barrage of ridicule and insults. It feels like the only thing I can count on right now. I don't want something dumb like respect and affection getting in the way. — Michael Buckley

By the way, you don't need the makeup." Puck said. — Michael Buckley

Please, don't hate me because I am beautiful. — Michael Buckley

Freaky monsters were trying to kill us," Sabrina said. "Should I have just died out there so you could keep your clubhouse secret?"
"Absolutely!" the prince said. — Michael Buckley

The Big Bad Wolf is asking for my help? The Devil must have his long underwear on today. — Michael Buckley

But, Dad! We can't leave. Uncle Jake is hurt!" Daphne said. "Besides, that's Pinocchio. I want to get an autograph. — Michael Buckley

I'm going to give you a sentence, a full sentence with a noun and a verb and a possible agitate. I don't like all these judges running around with their half baked sentences, thats how you get salmonella poisoning. — Michael Buckley

Save the people you love, who cares about the rest of the world? - Uncle Jake — Michael Buckley

If you want to be happy you have to work to make it happen. You can't just wish for it and you can't put it in the hands of other people. — Michael Buckley

Don't disrespect the sword marshmallow. — Michael Buckley

He did something so un-Pucklike, Sabrina couldn't believe it. He got up sat behind her, and let his enormous fairy wings sprout from his back. Then he wrapped them around her to keep the bitter cold away. It was the first truly nice thing the so-called Trickster King had ever done for her. — Michael Buckley

Of course, the Big Bad Wolf does yoga, Sabrina thought. Why did I even bother to ask? — Michael Buckley

New York City is a place where everyone lived on top of each other, and that was exactly how Sabrina liked it. Living out in the middle of nowhere was dangerous and suspicious. — Michael Buckley

You ignorant little rodent! This isn't just an old book. This is the book of Everafter."
"Sorry, I haven't read it. I'm waiting for the movie," Puck said. — Michael Buckley

I dont know what could possibly distract three pigs enough so that you can get away." Sabrina thought for a moment then grinned. "I know exactly what to do. — Michael Buckley

And a utility belt! I'm like an asthmatic Batman! — Michael Buckley

You mean people pay you to do this to them? I thought you had captured these people and brought them here against their will! How do I become a dentist? — Michael Buckley

You don't need the makeup."
Sabrina felt like her face is on fire. He knew about her late-night beauty sessions. And, if she had heard him correctly, he was also admitting that he thought she was pretty. She looks over at him and found he was looking at her.
"I kind of wish I hadn't said that," he said.
"Me, too," she replied.
"Would it help if I said you were stinky, muck-covered toad-face?"
Sabrina nodded and edged as far away as she could on the trampoline. Puck did the same. — Michael Buckley

Hen the first rubber ball smacked her in the head and made her brains rattle in her skull, she knew that something about this dodgeball game was different — Michael Buckley

And who are you supposed to be? the King of snot-nosed delinquents? — Michael Buckley

You've never heard of the Trickster King?" Puck asked, shocked.
The girls shook their heads.
"The Prince of Fairies? Robin Goodfellow? The Imp?"
"Do you work for Santa?" Daphne asked.
"I'm a fairy, not an elf!" Puck roared. "You really don't know who I am! Doesn't anyone read the classics anymore? Dozens of writers have warned about me. I'm in the most famous of all of William Shakespeare's plays."
"I don't remember any Puck in Romeo and Juliet," Sabrina muttered, feeling a little amused at how the boy was reacting to his non-celebrity.
"Besides Romeo and Juliet!" Puck shouted. "I'm the star of a Midsummer Night's Dream!"
"Congratulation," Sabrina said flatly. "Never read it. — Michael Buckley

You can't ground us. We're homeless," Daphne said. — Michael Buckley

Girls, I need to tell you some things about our family," Sabrina said. "Have you ever heard of the Brothers Grimm? — Michael Buckley

But know this, if you get killed out there I'm going to fire you. — Michael Buckley

Don't duh me!" Puck snapped. "Trying to figure out what you're thinking from one day to the next takes more brains than I have."
Well, maybe you should stop. I'd hate to burn out that little peanut in your head. — Michael Buckley

Puck stopped his drumming [on his belly] for a brief moment and grinned at Sabrina.
I hear they have a lot of plastic surgeons in New York City. If I were you I'd make an appointment for that face as soon as you get there," he quipped.
Sabrina scowled and shook a fist at him. "Keep it up, stinkpot, and you're going to need a plastic surgeon yourself."
Puck winked. "No need to get all mushy on me, Grimm. — Michael Buckley

I didn't do it,' he insisted.
'Then why did you run?' Sabrina asked.
'And send rabbits to eat us! I'm a seven-year-old girl,' Daphne said. 'Do you know how important bunny rabbits are to me? — Michael Buckley

That's why crazy people are so dangerous. You think they're nice until they're chaining you up in the garage. — Michael Buckley

You can be a homicidal madman and hilarious at the same time, you know, — Michael Buckley

Nothing like a puppet to give you the willies. — Michael Buckley

The only bad ideas are the ones never tried. — Michael Buckley

If only he can get over becoming a NERD. — Michael Buckley

Mirror sighed. I believe everyone deserves a happily ever after. But I think that happy endings don't just happen by accident- you can't wait for one. You have to make them happen. — Michael Buckley

Puck flapped up to the happy couple. "Wait a minute! You have to ask someone to marry you? No one told me that! I thought you just hit them with a club and dragged them back to your cave!"
Henry put his arm around Sabrina. "You're officially grounded from ever getting married."
"Thank you," Sabrina whispered sincerely. — Michael Buckley

Jack complained "I could really go for some bubble and squeak or some bangers. Do you kids think you could cook up some steak-and-kidney pie for me?"
The girls stared
"I hear noises coming from his mouth but they don't sound like words," Daphne said.
"Maybe he is having some kind of fit" Sabrina said. — Michael Buckley

I mean, if you could have a wizard grant a wish, would you waste it on going to Kansas? — Michael Buckley

Sabrina suggested they burn their orange monkey sweaters and blue heart covered pants but Daphne refused. Granny took Sabrina aside and apologised for the outfit, saying that Mr. Canis might not have been the right choice to shop for girls. After all, he was colour-blind. — Michael Buckley

really thats your code name? — Michael Buckley

Respect the Sword, Grimm. — Michael Buckley

It's not a matter of if . . . it's a matter of when. — Michael Buckley

If you want a happy ending you have to go out and take it. — Michael Buckley

Sabrina turned back to the house and saw the horrible truth- a pair of legs was sticking out from beneath it and they were wearing a pari of shiny silver shoes with a remarkable red tint to them. She suddenly realized they hadn't just entered a story. They had entered one of the most famous stories ever told.
Daphne, I don't think we're in Ferryport Landing anymore. — Michael Buckley

The world is always ruled by a maniac. - Baba Yaga — Michael Buckley

But that is love, isn't it? It's terribly inconvenient. It sweeps you up and stales your attention and slows down your work. our labors fall behind, our friends report us missing, and everything comes to a screeching halt! Everything, that is, except what truly matters in this life
true love. We've all been there. We know the feelings. So when we see it in a friend, a dear, dear friend, we throw down our work and we celebrate. We rejoice. We raise a glass. Because when we recognize it in the hearts of friends, it reminds us of how important it is in our own. Mr. Seven, you are and always have been my companion and friend. You have made me a better man, and almost on a daily basis you have reminded me that I too need to celebrate the love in my life. - William Charming — Michael Buckley

So this fairy tale is a horror story — Michael Buckley

So what's with the crown?" Daphne asked.
Puck's eyes grew wide. "I'm the Prince of Fairies. Emperor of Pixies, Brownies, Hobgoblins, Elves and Gnomes. King of Tricksters and Prank-Players, spiritual leader to juvenile delinquents, layabouts and bad apples. — Michael Buckley

The night is young, and by the grace of magic, so are we. — Michael Buckley

Is this a torture chamber?" Puck asked eagerly. "Listen to all the suffering! Isn't it cool?"
"This is a dental office," the receptionist explained. "People come here to get a healthy smile."
There was another groan.
Puck laughed. "Sure! That guy sounds like he's smiling alright. Are you hiring? — Michael Buckley

Sabrina leaned in and pressed her lips to Puck's. There was a little static shock that startled her and she stepped back with her hands on her mouth. — Michael Buckley

Are you familiar with that play? In fact, we're almost living it! — Michael Buckley

Trickster," he said, sniffing the boy. "Love will be the end of you. — Michael Buckley

Puck rushed into the kitchen. He looked as if he had just gotten off a roller coaster. "That was awesome!" he cried. "The arrow coming out is totally more fun to watch going in. — Michael Buckley

Maybe one of the monsters ate him," Daphne whimpered.
"That would be awesome," Puck said.
Sabrina flashed him an angry look.
"Awesome in a terrible, heartbreakingly tragic way," Puck continued. — Michael Buckley

Puck turned to Sabrina. "What is she doing down there?"
Hiding, I guess."
Puck leaned down and poked his head under the seat. "I found you."
Ms. Smirt shrieked.
Puck lifted himself up to his full height and laughed. "She's fun."
He leaned back down and she screamed again. "I could do this all day. Can I keep her? — Michael Buckley

I was going to say he's aimless," the witch replied. "I know he's a bit old to be old to living at home with his mom, but he's had a difficult time holding a job. He's worked at Wendy's, Taco Bell, and Burger King, but it all ends the same way- he challenges his manager to combat, takes over the restaurant, and enslaves his coworkers. Then it's back to video games." - Morgan le Fay — Michael Buckley

How ironic, she thought, as she fell to her certain death, that at that moment she would have given anything to be a giant goose again. — Michael Buckley

Daphne, I don't think we're in Ferrypot Landing anymore.
~Sabrina Grimm — Michael Buckley

That woman is hiding something!" she said.
"You think everyone's hiding something."
"And you would hug the devil if he gave you cookies. — Michael Buckley

Trickster, love will be the end of you. — Michael Buckley

I know what I'm doing," he growled.
"If you knew what you were doing, we wouldn't have two million zombie bunnies chasing us!" she shouted.
"Guys," Daphne said, trying to get their attention, but her sister was too angry to listen.
"How was I supposed to know that kid was mentally unhinged?" Puck said.
"I don't know," Sabrina snapped. "Maybe when we found him running from a dead body?"
"Guys!" Daphne shouted.
"What!" Puck and Sabrina snapped.
"LOOK OUT! — Michael Buckley

I feel like a movie star," Daphne said as the girls hurried downstairs. "You look like a mental patient," Sabrina remarked. — Michael Buckley

I ate her cooking for eighteen years," he whispered. "You get used to it."
"Oh yeah, when?"
"I think it happened around the seventeenth year," Henry said. — Michael Buckley

Now you get off that Pegasus and come down here and start acting your age!"
"Honey, he's four thousand years old," Veronica said. — Michael Buckley

Moth, that wasn't very nice. — Michael Buckley

That's the coolest thing I've ever seen," Puck said.
"How cool will it be when it kills us?" Sabrina asked.
"Considerably less cool," Puck replied. — Michael Buckley

Animals shouldn't eat gumdrops! They shouldn't drink tea or chocolate milk, either. — Michael Buckley

Raising her hand and shaking the handcuffs, the shaking Pucks arm as well.
"Unfortunately, it is necessary," Puck explained. "You don't want to work with by security staff so from now on I'm going to be your personal bodyguard. Going to be with you every second of the day. — Michael Buckley

Insensitivity to human pain and sorrow, isolation from the international experiences of exploitation and misery, and indifference to the great questions of economic justice and human rights must mark a human being a savage in the twenty-first century, whatever his or her humanistic conquests in terms of literary skills or refined taste. — Michael Buckley

How did you know that we could get him to do whatever we want if we pretend he's in charge?" Sabrina asked Daphne.
"It's what I do with you" the little girl replied. "You two are exactly the same — Michael Buckley

Each time she applied her lip gloss, she imagined another fleet of brain cells dying a horrible death. — Michael Buckley

I'm soooooo telling." Puck stood behind her. "You two disobeyed your parents! I'm both shocked and really impressed. — Michael Buckley

When did you suddenly become Mister Maturity? — Michael Buckley

Old lady, if I die I'd like you to do one small thing for me. I want you to build a one-hundred-acre museum dedicated to my memory. Bronze my clothing and possessions. Have at least three hundred marble statues erected of me in my most dashing poses. One of these statues should stand one hundred feet tall and greet ships as they float down the Hudson River. One of the fourteen wings of the museum should have an amusement park with the world's fastest roller coaster inside. None of these rides should be equipped with safety devices. You can license some of the space to fast-food restaurants and ice-cream parlors but nothing should be healthy or nutritious. The gift shop should sell stuffed Puck dolls packed with broken glass and asbestos. There's a more detailed list in my room. Puck saidduble — Michael Buckley

Keep your distance, men. Don't be fooled into believing that our enemies are helpless. These 'girls', as they call themselves are a crafty bunch. I've see inside the thing they call a 'purse'. It is filled with all kinds of toxic sprays and pointy things they wouldn't hesitate unleashed on us — Michael Buckley

You sick, twisted monster, Sabrina seethed at Pinocchio. — Michael Buckley

If he is so evil, why are we standing here watching him?" Sabrina said.
"Cause I'm trying to get up the courage to go over and asking for an autograph," Puck said. — Michael Buckley

You can't judge the many by the actions of the few. — Michael Buckley

I'm going to teach you the art of swordsmanship-or in other words, how to totally kill someone with a sharp, pointy thing. — Michael Buckley

So Henry," Puck said as he kicked off his shoes and propped his smelly feet on the kitchen table. "I was wondering what you can tell me about puberty."
Henry turned pale and stammered.
Sabrina wanted to crawl under the table and die. — Michael Buckley

Snow, get behind me!" Charming shouted as he leaped to his feet. "I'll handle this brute."
"Billy", the teacher cried. "This is the twenty-first century, Women don't need the white knight routine anymore. I can fight my own battles. — Michael Buckley

He turned into a rhinocerous," Ms. Smirt said.
"He does that," Sabrina said. — Michael Buckley