Good Puns Quotes & Sayings

My being a writer and playing Scrabble are connected. If I have a good writing day, I'll take a break and play online Scrabble. My favorite word as a child was 'carrion,' before I knew what it meant. I later created crossword puzzles, which was a lot about puns, and how words would create these strange, strange things. — Meg Wolitzer

Deuce groaned. "Ma, what sort of pie was that?" He was rubbing his stomach.
"Bitter cherry. Lucy Hopewel had one at the potluck a week back, and I thought I might try it. It wasn't good?"
"It was good, Ma," Ty said, voice flat.
"Where do you get bitter cherries?" Deuce asked.
"Disgruntled trees," Ty said. He looked over his shoulder with a smirk. — Abigail Roux

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted. — Fred Allen

The lodgings were on the top floor next to the well-guarded premises of a respectable dealer in stolen property because, as Granny had heard, good fences make good neighbors. — Terry Pratchett

Would I laugh?"
"Matter of fact, you would," says Zeb. "Heart like shale. What you need is a good fracking. — Margaret Atwood

I love puns. I've been known to turn the car around just to take advantage of a good pun situation. It really is the highest form of humor. — Karin Slaughter

Kelly glanced at the freezer as they headed for the steps. "Hey, maybe one of them will donate a liver to your dad."
Nick looked over his shoulder at Kelly, his eyes wide.
"I'm just saying. Three perfectly good livers sitting in there," Kelly said, completely deadpan. "Nobody's using them. I'll go get one for you."
Nick gaped at him. "How the hell did you ever pass your psych evals?"
"I cheated off your papers."
Nick rolled his eyes and started up the stairs.
"The Navy gives bubble tests. When in doubt, go with C."
"Kelly."
"Get it? Navy? The sea?"
"Kels, shut up."
"Oh, come on! You love puns."
Nick laughed, unable to stop himself. — Abigail Roux

... the Chinese have become very good at coming up with puns, alternative words, and memes. For example, they talk about the battle between the grass-mud horse and the river crab. The grass-mud horse, caonima, is the phonogram for "mother-fucker" - what the netizens call themselves. The river crab, hexie, is the phonogram for "harmonisation" or "censorship". So you have a battle between the caonima and the hexie. When big political stories happen, you find netizens discussing them using such weird phrases and words that you can't understand them even if you have a PhD in Chinese. — Michael Anti

I believe in reincarnation," [Bjorn] said.
I KNOW.
"I tried to live a good life. Does that help?"
THAT'S NOT UP TO ME. Death coughed. OF COURSE ... SINCE YOU BELIEVE IN REINCARNATION ... YOU'LL BE BJORN AGAIN. — Terry Pratchett

People, if you can't get through the puns, I can't give you the good stuff. — Jon Stewart

There is never a bad time for a pun. There's also never really a good time for a pun. You might as well just stay braced for a pun at all times, and ride them when they come with as much grace as you can manage.The fact that you can replace 'pun' with 'disaster' in the last three rules says a lot about the human race. — Terry Pratchett

Skinny jeans were only good if you had skinny genes. — Matt Dunn

Good words were the difference between Emily eating well and not. And what she had found worked best were not facts or arguments but words that tickled people's brains for some reason, that just amused them. Puns, and exaggerations, and things that were true and not at the same time. — Max Barry