Helen Keeble Quotes & Sayings

According to the date on Van's driver's license, he was seventeen. Somehow he'd looked a lot older when he'd been trying to cut my head off. — Helen Keeble

I ran straight into the wooden fence at the foot of the field.
I was lucky that it had been a rail fence, rather than a barbed wire, or I would have shredded myself into vampire linguine. — Helen Keeble

He threw back his shoulders, a hunter preparing to stalk his prey across the night ... and pulled an iPhone out of his pocket.
"You are kidding me." I watched as he tapped through screens with practiced swipes. "There's an app for that? — Helen Keeble

Dad pulled me into a brief hug. "You're still my girl. Are you hungry? We got, um
"
"Yes, I already met Toast." I sighed. "Please tell me that Marmalade and Sugar Puff aren't a rabbit and a hamster."
He dropped his gaze sheepishly and mumbled, "Chinchilla. — Helen Keeble

We both looked down at the stake through my heart.
Funny. I would have thought that should hurt more.
From the look on the vampire hunter's face, he thought it should hurt more too. — Helen Keeble

I was a vampire, and ... someone was trying to call me?
When my parents had said that not even death could pry me from my mobile phone, I'd thought they were joking. I wriggled around in the narrow coffin until I could reach the ringing handset. — Helen Keeble

And then he did move, because my hardcover copy of Breaking Dawn whacked him full in the face, with all my vampiric strength propelling it. — Helen Keeble

The next evening found me having breakfast with a ridiculously hot guy. It was typical of my life that this would only happen when said guy was tied up. — Helen Keeble

You can't hurt him. He's an endangered species!"
"Vampires are not endangered." Van's tone made it clear that it was his life's work to rectify this regrettable situation.
"No, not that," Zack said dismissively. "He's a Victorian!"
"Brainwashed," Van muttered.
"Crazy," Sarah proclaimed.
"Steampunk," I corrected with a sigh. — Helen Keeble

Dad got me a ... guinea pig?"
"For breakfast," Zack said. "That's why I named her Toast. You aren't going to eat her, are you?"
"No!"
"Woot!" Zack hugged the cage to his chest, carrying it off in the direction of his bedroom. "I hope you don't want to eat Marmalade or Sugar Puff either!"
"Marma
oh, never mid. — Helen Keeble

I broke off from my hummed rendition of "U Can't Touch This.""I'm a seraph," I reminded her happily."I'm supposed to sing constant praises."
"Not about yourself!"
"Doo be do do- demons can't touch this!" I sang again. — Helen Keeble