Ventura Quotes & Sayings

What do we have for veterans? Government-run health care. I understand that. Congressmen and senators ... they get five choices of government-run health care. Why should a congressman and senator get anything more than a regular citizen does? Why are they privileged and the rest of us aren't? — Jesse Ventura

The totally alive, totally conscious, and totally aware Universe takes care of itself completely. It is totally self-reliant and totally self- sufficient. it is perfect. — Chris Prentiss

The pleasure was all yours. — Jesse Ventura

I wish they would pass a law where all Democrats and Republicans had to wear NASCAR racing suits, because if you look at the NASCAR drivers, it tells who their sponsors are. And if they do that, we could then become informed voters, because we would know who owns them. — Jesse Ventura

Jesse Ventura is basically proof that the people of Minnesota are not social drinkers ... they are obviously alcoholics. — Lewis Black

I don't take PAC money. I don't take special interest money. — Jesse Ventura

I also believe that government has no business telling us how we should live our lives. I think our lifestyle choices should be left up to us. What we do in our private lives is none of the government's business. That position rules out the Republican Party for me. — Jesse Ventura

I could never be a career politician, because I believe in telling the truth. — Jesse Ventura

I was a giant fan of 'Whose Line Is It Anyway' in high school, and I was obsessed with Jim Carrey and cut out any picture of Jim Carrey that ever came in any kind of magazine. I put it all over my walls. At the time, I thought humor was just repeating lines from 'Ace Ventura' ad nauseum in the back of my advanced math class. — Jordan Klepper

What we call coincidences, accidental and remarkable events occurring at the same time, are actually circumstances and events that have come into your life to serve a purpose is to benefit you. — Chris Prentiss

When you change the way you see and interpret events, suddenly everything will be different for you. Everything will make sense. — Chris Prentiss

I'm against the draft. I believe we should have a professional military; it might be smaller, but it would be more effective. — Jesse Ventura

Democrats are so spineless, so afraid to go against the tide ... but dissension is the greatest form of patriotism. — Jesse Ventura

Okay, fluoride in the water to help our teeth. Well, shouldn't that be the job of your mom and dad? To teach you how to brush your teeth and use mouth wash? What do we need the government to do it for? Clearly, what a scam. Fluoride in the water. — Jesse Ventura

I love my country, not my government. — Jesse Ventura

I follow the teachings of Major General Smedley Darlington Butler, United States Marine Corps. He won two Congressional Medals of Honor, and he wrote the highly controversial antiwar book 'War is a Racket.' — Jesse Ventura

I don't want to spend the rest of my life in politics. When I'm finished with my term as governor, I'm going back to the life that's waiting for me in the private sector. — Jesse Ventura

My father used to always say to me that, you know, if a guy goes out to steal a loaf of bread to feed his family, they'll give him 10 years, but a guy can do white-collar crime and steal the money of thousands and he'll get probation and a slap on the wrist. — Jesse Ventura

Don't vote for a Democrat or Republican, I have never voted for one in my life and I never will. — Jesse Ventura

I do not support the third party movement anymore. I now advocate the abolishment of all political parties. We've allowed the parties to take over the government. — Jesse Ventura

Al Gore, you've been a real inspiration. But a lot of other people who preach the global warming gospel aren't out to save the world. They're out to run it. — Jesse Ventura

Government has no place telling you who to fall in love with and who to marry. — Jesse Ventura

When we build a public library, we don't have to pay to get in, but when we build a stadium, we have to pay the owner every time we go to a game. — Jesse Ventura

There's nothing glamorous about war at all. — Jesse Ventura

I love fashion, obviously, but I hate trying on clothes. — Cassie Ventura

I never thought I'd be investigating global warming. I believe it's real and that saving the planet is good. — Jesse Ventura

I speak my mind. If it offends some people, well, there's not much I can do about that. But I'm going to be honest. I'm going to continue to speak my mind, and that's who I am ... — Jesse Ventura

I believe in the America people's ability to govern themselves. If government would just get out of the way and allow them to lead their lives as they choose, they will succeed. — Jesse Ventura

There are two thoughts that will ensure success in all you do; (1) Don't tell everything you know, and (2) until Ace Ventura, no actor had considered talking through his ass. — Jim Carrey

How come life in prison doesn't mean life? Until it does, we're not ready to do away with the death penalty. Stop thinking in terms of "punishment" for a minute and think in terms of safeguarding innocent people from incorrigible murderers. — Jesse Ventura

I will not be a Democrat or a Republican. They are the problem, not the solution. We need to abolish political parties in this country. — Jesse Ventura

Anyone can run for office. When I ran for Governor of Minnesota, the only requirement was that you had to be a state resident. I believe you had to be over thirty five years old, something like that. That's the way our country was founded. That anyone can run for office. That you're not required to be a lawyer, you're not required to be anything. — Jesse Ventura

There's no question that we need tougher drunk-driving laws for repeat offenders. We need to take a lesson from European countries where driving isn't a right but a privilege. — Jesse Ventura

It may be that it is not given to us to know when we are angels. We may only be given to know when others are. This may be one of the reasons we need each other so. — Michael Ventura

People who are dependent are merely using alcohol as a crutch to get through the day. Yet doctors and scientists are still treating "alcoholism" as if it is the problem, when it has nothing to do with the problem. They might as well be studying "scratchism" for people who have a chronic itch. — Chris Prentiss

When I ran for governor of Minnesota, I only raised $300,000. — Jesse Ventura

I'm an equal opportunity despiser. — Jesse Ventura

Just remember ... it doesn't matter how long you have known each other.. all that matters is that he has kept you smiling from day one — Cassie Ventura

Enhanced Interrogation is Dick Cheney changing a word, Dick Cheney comes up with a new word to cover his ass! — Jesse Ventura

A vote is "wasted" when someone fails to vote their conscience. — Jesse Ventura

If Waterboarding is okay, then why don't we let our police do it to criminals so they can find out what they know? Because it's against the law. If we're not going to be a country that stand's for the rule of law, when it's convenient or inconvenient, then what DO we stand for. — Jesse Ventura

This declaration of Jesus is the central duty of the true servant of the Lord. So what does this actually mean? To preach Christ is to proclaim the great truths about and the profound implications of his glorious person and finished redemptive work in the place of sinners on the cross of Calvary, making him known as He is set forth in the entirety of the Scriptures. — Rob Ventura

Whatever you now do, whatever you now believe, whatever your current circumstances may be, you are perfectly equipped and fully capable of fulfilling your needs and desires. — Chris Prentiss

Students often approached me about state-paid tuition while I was out campaigning. After I explained to them that if the state pays their tuition now, they will pay higher taxes to pay other people's tuition for the rest of their lives, most of them ended up agreeing with me. — Jesse Ventura

I don't support abortion. I could never participate in one. But I think it would be a mistake to make them illegal again. — Jesse Ventura

Government is at its worst when you have apathy from its citizens. — Jesse Ventura

You've got to audition! It's tough out there, no matter how well-known you are. — Cassie Ventura

They look like to carp going after the same piece of corn. — Jesse Ventura

Until you have hunted men, you haven't hunted yet. — Jesse Ventura

I think that Minnesota is different because we are proving that tri-partisan government could work, that you do not need to necessarily be a Democrat or a Republican to be successful at governing. — Jesse Ventura

After Barack Obama won the 2008 presidential election, I was heartened to see him issue an Open Government Initiative on his first full day in office. — Jesse Ventura

I tend to like to read history - recent history, because I find that much more intriguing than just a writer's imagination. — Jesse Ventura

With emancipation comes the opening up of new possibilities for challenging assumptions over women's appearance and, more radically, the gender order itself. Ventura (She-Thing) comes not only to accept her new "intragender" status but to see it as advantageous -- for dealing with her misandry, for personal growth, and even for becoming a person capable of giving and accepting love. — Jose Alaniz

In the last recession, 99 percent of us have lost wealth, but did you know that the top 1 percent increased their wealth five times? It tells you they create recessions so they get wealthier. — Jesse Ventura

My position is that it isn't government's job to mandate patriotism. To me, mandating a pledge of allegiance to a government is something Saddam Hussein would do. — Jesse Ventura

To be physically astute and psychologically tended, yet morally insulated and conceptually blind
is to be crazy, not healthy. — Michael Ventura

I've opened up my school in California in a beautiful facility on Ventura Boulevard. I'm always in heaven when I'm doing my classes. — Tasha Smith

Though many strive to hide their human libidinousness from themselves and each other, being a force of nature, it breaks through. Lots of uptight, proper Americans were scandalized by the way Elvis moved his hips when he sang "rock and roll." But how many realized what the phrase rock and roll meant? Cultural historian Michael Ventura, investigating the roots of African-American music, found that rock 'n' roll was a term that originated in the juke joints of the South. Long in use by the time Elvis appeared, Ventura explains the phrase "hadn't meant the name of a music, it meant 'to fuck.' 'Rock,' by itself, has pretty much meant that, in those circles, since the twenties at least." By the mid-1950s, when the phrase was becoming widely used in mainstream culture, Ventura says the disc jockeys "either didn't know what they were saying or were too sly to admit what they knew. — Christopher Ryan

Government is connected to everything we do. — Jesse Ventura

The priority of the Democrats and Republicans ... is to preserve ... power when [they have] it, and to gain power when [they do not]. [Their] collective priority ... is to make sure that, together, they control the electoral process and under no circumstances allow an independent or third party to infringe on their exclusive franchise. — Jesse Ventura

I was afraid of Korean food when I moved to L.A., let alone sushi. I remember thinking either sink or swim. Living here in Studio City, Ventura Blvd. is the Mecca of sushi restaurants. What you thought was so exotic is just run of the mill. — Parvesh Cheena

Well my question is if the federal courts don't have jurisdiction over a constitutional question then who the hell does? — Jesse Ventura

What I found most refreshing about Governor Ventura was his willingness to defend his positions and attack his interrogators ... He's an imposing man who's not easily intimidated, and he's convinced he has the aura that will take him to higher places. — Jesse Ventura

My children were attacked by the Minnesota media when I was governor. — Jesse Ventura

Negative emotions, like depression or anxiety, have been shown to affect our immune system. Stress impedes wound healing. — Chris Prentiss

I'm still working on my time machine. If I ever perfect it, I'm going back in time to prevent Ace Ventura 2 from being made. And then I'm going after Hitler. — Andy Kindler

I believe that the Rolling Stones and Led Zeppelin are two of the greatest rock bands ever! — Jesse Ventura

I like surfing in Mexico a whole lot better than sitting with people in Washington that I don't even like. — Jesse Ventura

Patagonia, a large apparel manufacturer based in Ventura, California, has organized itself as a 'B-corporation.' That's a for-profit company whose articles of incorporation require it to take into account the interests of workers, the community, and the environment, as well as shareholders. — Robert Reich

When you reach a certain age in life, time becomes more important than money, and I think that happens in your 50s. — Jesse Ventura

I used to surf up in Ventura County at Silver Strand; plus, I've played up there many times. — Dick Dale

The value of having an inner map of the world as it is (not as it's broadcast) is this: it allows you to know that your task is larger than yourself. If you choose, just by virtue of being a decent person, you are entrusted with passing on something of value through a dark, crazy time-preserving your integrity, in your way, by your acts and your very breathing for those who will build again when this chaos exhausts itself. — Michael Ventura

A crime is a crime, regardless of what collar you wear. — Jesse Ventura

I speak my mind. That's who I am. — Jesse Ventura

Barack Obama's large contributor was Goldman Sachs - same thing on the Republican side. If you go to both their conventions, you see the same lobbyists paying off both sides so they win either way. — Jesse Ventura

When the people clamor to be shielded from reality, when they praise their government for keeping things from them, when they choose to conduct their lives within the limits of whatever fantasy the government supplies, then they are no longer consenting to be governed, they are begging to be ruled. — Michael Ventura

There are lots of people out there who think they know the truth about God and religion, but does anybody really know for sure? That's why the founding fathers built freedom of religious belief into the structure of this nation, so that everybody could make up their minds for themselves. — Jesse Ventura

Politics is not my life. I have a career in radio and another career in film. — Jesse Ventura

I live by the golden rule: Treat others as you'd want them to treat you ... — Jesse Ventura

I'm tolerant of all religions ... I don't care if someone wants to go out there and worship the bark on a tree. — Jesse Ventura

There is much more to being a patriot and a citizen than reciting the pledge or raising a flag. — Jesse Ventura

'The David Letterman Show' is a show of comedy. — Jesse Ventura

Some felt I'm not academically qualified, and they're right. — Jesse Ventura

If I wanna be president, I probably can. — Jesse Ventura

You can't put civil rights on the ballot. — Jesse Ventura

If I had the money and the drinking capacity, I'd probably live at a roulette table and let my life go to hell. — Michael Ventura

I think a person who is disabled should be disabled by no act of their own. If you become disabled because of alcoholism, drugs, or things of that nature, I do not think those conditions qualify someone to be called disabled. I think those conditions result from personal decisions. — Jesse Ventura

Your perception of the world and the way you see yourself in it has created within your mind a concept, a philosophy, of the way you believe things to be. — Chris Prentiss

I think that when Americans go to vote, states should not list what party the candidates are affiliated with. That would require voters to actually think and get to know a candidate instead of voting for their favorite gang. 'Oh, this guy is a Republican, so he must be good.' — Jesse Ventura

We call our country home of the brave and land of the free, but it's not. We give a false portrayal of freedom. We're not free - if we were, we'd allow people their freedom. Prohibiting something doesn't make it go away. Prostitution is criminal, and bad things happen because it's run illegally by dirt-bags who are criminals. If it's legal, then the girls could have health checks, unions, benefits, anything any other worker gets, and it would be far better. — Jesse Ventura

I've never been arrested in my life. Never had cuffs put on me, never been charged with a crime, never spent one day in jail. — Jesse Ventura

I don't believe we need the government's help as much as some think we do. That belief sets me apart from the Democrats, since their way of dealing with everything is to tax and spend. — Jesse Ventura

Government's role should be only to keep the playing field level, and to work hand in hand with business on issues such as employment. But beyond this, to as great an extent as possible, it should get the hell out of the way. — Jesse Ventura

Let me say this: I'm paranoid of the government. They've lost my trust. They've lied to me so many times that I don't know what to believe from them anymore. — Jesse Ventura

Government cannot be your parent. — Jesse Ventura

'The Young and the Restless' is my favorite television show. — Jesse Ventura

People don't like politicians. — Jesse Ventura

As governor, there isn't a lot I can do beyond that to crack down on crime. Law enforcement is really a local issue. It's the cops' job to tighten down on criminals. — Jesse Ventura

I'm going to put on my gravestone, 'He never owned a cell phone.' — Jesse Ventura

If you're smart enough to go to college, you should be smart and creative enough to pay for it. — Jesse Ventura