Quotes & Sayings About Tofu

A tofu birthday cake dosn't wreak a marriage; but if you cut the tofu into lewd shapes, you are probably asking for trouble. Looking back, I think we stopped being kind to each other. And we became competitors ...
Love cannot be sustained under these conditions, any more that yeast will proof in cold water. — Michael Lee West

I can make fried tofu, boiled tofu, stuffed tofu. Cutlets and other fancy stuff, that's for other directors. — Yasujiro Ozu

I'm always thirsty when I wake up, so I guzzle a bottle of Smart water before I scramble tofu with onions, peppers and spinach and top it with salsa. I've been a vegetarian for years, but I recently became vegan. — Carrie Underwood

Breakfast: eggs, egg whites, lean breakfast meats, Greek yogurt, smoothies with protein powder. Lunch or dinner: salmon, chicken breasts, extra-lean ground turkey, extra-lean ground beef, turkey or chicken sausage, lean beef (top round, shoulder roast, skirt steak), tuna, cod, tilapia, shrimp, tofu. Snacks: Greek yogurt, nuts and seeds, roasted edamame beans, protein bars (pick bars with at least 10 grams of protein and no more than 30 grams of carbs), protein shakes. — Michael A. Roussell

You know, I use organic products, but I get [laser treatments]. It's what makes life interesting, finding the balance between cigarettes and tofu. — Gwyneth Paltrow

Instincts that worked in the ancestral environment were not sufficient in a world that regulated playground visits and allowed choices between tofu and pizza. — Graeme Simsion

Well, there was a time when we used to sacrifice goats, but then we all became vegans, so we've been sacrificing tofu before the shows! — Jared Leto

That's the problem with stinky tofu. It's so yummy, — Lenore Look

I eat lots of veggies and pasta and nuts, tofu and soups. Works well for my body, and I also feel more in tune. — Isabel Lucas

For the gentle werelibrarian, who's strictly vegetarian, there's nothing like Tofillager the MEATLESS TOFU VILLAGER — Adam Rex

I'm a vegetarian; I eat a lot of tofu and soy. — Kristen Wiig

I fall down all the time because I'm such a klutz, but I have never broken a bone, and I don't eat milk or cheese ever. I like tofu cheese and soymilk in my coffee and cereal. — Grace Slick

Jesus and Paul were serious dudes. They had teeth missing. Jesus was a carpenter, Paul was in prison. These guys didn't eat tofu dogs and bean sprouts. They didn't play tennis. If there were trucks back in their times, they would have been doing driveway lube jobs on a Saturday afternoon. Same thing with King David. Yeah, he might have played a lyre, but he slaughtered thousands of guys. — Mark Driscoll

I can't be sure, of course, but I'd compare it to living on tofu and soy milk; we call ourselves vegetarians, our little inside joke. - Edward Cullen — Stephenie Meyer

Tofu tacos are not Mexican. I think putting tofu on anything and calling it Mexican is an insult to my people. — Simone Elkeles

Foods with Potential Thermogenic Properties Coconut oil Olive oil Green tea Walnuts Mustard (yellow or Dijon) Foods That Stick to Your Ribs Almonds Raisins Apples Yogurt (nonfat) Chickpeas Eggs Dried plums (prunes) Cod Greens (any kind of leafy greens) Rye Lentils Tofu Peanut butter (natural) Whey protein Pistachios (roasted, unsalted, in the shell) — Phillip C. McGraw

Cumquats? I've had a few, but then again, tofu dementia. — Robert Leland Taylor

I take vitamins daily, but just the bare essentials not what you'd call supplements. I try to stick to a vegan diet heavy on fruit, vegetables, tofu, and other soy products. — Clint Eastwood

Alright, kids, who wants to try a home-made veggie sausage spiced with the secret herbs of the jungle's dark and vengeful heart? I can through some on the grill with the next round of tofu burgers. — Alex Gabriel

Shit is the tofu of cursing and can be molded to whichever condition the speaker desires. Hot as shit. Windy as shit. I myself was confounded as shit ... — David Sedaris

I just want to make a tray of good tofu. If people want something else, they should go to the restaurants and shops. — Yasujiro Ozu

Visit Arcata, I really do recommend it. Play the nearly impossible to find original Pac Man at the cafe, explore the HSU campus, see a two-dollar movie, buy a tofu dog from the vendor in Town Square, sleep on the rooftops, and if they ask you what time it is, there's only one correct answer
'4:20'! — CrimethInc.

I had the impression that her place was near mine, but even by bus it took about twenty minutes. She lived alone in an apartment house, square and white like a block of tofu, on the edge of town. — Banana Yoshimoto

Everyone on my team is different in terms of how long before a workout they prefer to eat. I like to eat my big meal 4.5-5 hours before I play. I usually eat a carb either rice or pasta with tofu or chicken. Around 2 hours before I play to like to eat greek yogurt with a banana. — Kim Smith

Any kind of food you eat is going to have an impact on the world. If you switch to tofu and get off meat, the soy bean is doing enormous damage in the Amazon and all throughout South America. — Michael Pollan

The only time they ever throw anything away is when it's really and truly broken, and then they make a big deal about it. They save up all their bent pins and broken sewing needles and once a year they do a whole memorial service for them, chanting and then sticking them into a block of tofu so they will have a nice soft place to rest. Jiko says that everything has a spirit, even if it is old and useless, and we must console and honor the things that have served us well. — Ruth Ozeki

We've all seen chicken portrayed as the low-fat, heart-healthy alternative to red meat for years, but it no longer adds up. You might want to lean away from eating birds and lean toward more plant-based options of protein like black beans, lentils, tofu, chickpeas and whole grains. — Kathy Freston

We boarded the plane after boxing our stakes and knives and taking them to a FedEx carrier, airport security being so strict nowadays. In the section marked 'contents', Bones filled out 'Tofu'. God, but he had a sick sense of humor sometimes. — Jeaniene Frost

Marry me, Kiara," he blurts out in front of everyone.
"Why?" she asks, challenging him.
"Because I love you," he says, walking up to her and bending down on one knee while he takes her hand in his, "and I want to go to sleep with you every night and wake up seein' your face every mornin', I want you to be the mother of my children, I want to fix cars with you and eat your crappy tofu tacos that you think are Mexican. I want to climb mountains with you and be challenged by you, I want to argue with you just so we can have crazy hot makeup sex. Marry me, because without you I'd be six feet under ... and because I love your family like they're my own ... and because you're my best friend and I want to grow old with you." He starts tearing up, and it's shocking because I've never seen him cry. "Marry me, Kiara Westford, because when I got shot the only thing I was thinkin' about was comin' back here and makin' you my wife. Say yes, chica. — Simone Elkeles

Tofu and futons. The adepts of Orientalism seem to spend most of their lives reclining. They can't quite summon the energy to crawl up onto a chair. Even their Yogic exercises are carried out in a prone or sitting position. — Edward Abbey

When I look back, I can say that the summer when I was 19 was a formative time for me. But at the time I just thought I was making tofu every night for dinner and going to work. — Zoe Kazan

My parents were vegetarians. I'd show up at school, this giant black kid, with none of the cool clothes and a tofu sandwich and celery sticks. — Aisha Tyler

Rich tofu-eaters would move out to the country, buy a small farm that was going under anyway and then not know what to do with it. (See Green Acres and multiply by hundreds of thousands and both members Eva Gabor. But crossed with Karen Carpenter and take away all shreds of common sense.) — John Ringo

The human brain comprises 70% water, which means it's a similar consistency to tofu. Picture that for a second - a blob of tofu the size and shape of a brain. Now imagine taking that piece of tofu, and forcing your thumbs into it hard. It would burst wouldn't it?
Okay, now imagine those thumbs weren't thumbs but thumb-shaped pieces of bad news. And there weren't two of them, they were about half a dozen. Imagine you were forcing all six pieces of bad news - a divorce, multiple career snubs, accusations from the family of a dead celebrity, estranged kids, borderline homelessness, that kind of thing - into a piece of tofu.
With me? Good. Now imagine it's not tofu, but a human brain. And they're not pieces of bad news but six human thumbs. That's what happened to me. In 2001, my brain had half a dozen thumbs pushed into it. — Alan Partridge

The figure of the enthusiast who has just discovered jogging or a new way to fix tofu can be said to stand or, more accurately, to tremble on the threshold of conversion, as the representative American — Lewis H. Lapham

People tend to be more tofu-like, able to absorb whatever environment they're dropped into. But where does the adaptability end and your actual personality begin? — Sloane Crosley

And Casey said, "We could go get a pizza and a beer, maybe? If you wanted to."
And this. This was on the list. Gus was prepared for this. And before he could think it through, Gus said, "Hey, bro, I have a better idea. Let's go try that heart-healthy vegan restaurant that just opened over on Main Street. I hear their crispy kale and tofu salad is the bomb."
Lottie dropped the smoothie she was making. It exploded as soon as it hit the ground, berry juice spraying all over her. "Sorry," she exclaimed. "So sorry! It just slipped!"
Gus didn't pay much attention because he was in the throes of realizing two things at once: first, no new heart-healthy vegan restaurant has opened in Abby, much less on Main Street. And two, being normal was a lot harder than it looked because what the hell had he just done? — T.J. Klune

The mind is like tofu. It tastes like whatever you marinate it in. — Sylvia Boorstein

I only get fat when I eat food cooked by other chefs. At home, my wife does all the cooking. She makes simple things like soups and salads. We both like steamed tofu. — Alain Ducasse

Pretending Tina Patterson was Jessica James was like pretending tofu was steak. — Penny Reid

There is cheese from just about every country in the world except China. No cheese from China? Maybe tofu is Chinese cheese. No wonder there was a cultural revolution. — Jim Gaffigan

For a healthy alternative to buffalo wings, slide the bone of a human finger into a block of tofu and bake. — Giada De Laurentiis

Fantasy is silver and scarlet, indigo and azure, obsidian veined with gold and lapis lazuli. Reality is plywood and plastic, done up in mud brown and olive drab. Fantasy tastes of habaneros and honey, cinnamon and cloves, rare red meat and wines as sweet as summer. Reality is beans and tofu, and ashes at the end. — George R R Martin

It's all about salsa with grain chips, tofu, turkey slices, hummus, and coconut water. — Laurieann Gibson

If it weren't for Julia Child, I might never have moved past brown rice and tofu. Worse, I might still be afraid of being less than perfect. — Julia Child

Chili dogs, funnel cakes, fried bread, majorly greasy pizza, candy apples, ye gods. Evil food smells amazing
which is either proof that there is a Satan or some equivalent out there, or that the Almighty doesn't actually want everyone to eat organic tofu all the time. I can't decide. — Jim Butcher

I don't like tofu. I'd sooner eat a sponge. — Sylvia Browne

A man of quality is not threatened by a woman with tofu. — Elliot Katz

The only things that smell good are fat and sugar. Tofu being boiled doesn't smell good. Anything that smells good is fattening. — John Madden

She forks up a little nibble and wedges it in her mouth. "Yum," she croaks.
Mrs. Wong looks pleased. "It's made with tofu."
I can't resist. "Free-range tofu?"
My mother looks over at me sharply.
Mrs. Wong takes the bait. "Now, Cassidy, tofu isn't an animal," she chides. "It's soy bean curd. Soy bean curd doesn't need to roam free."
On the floor below me, Emma lets out a little snort. I nudge her again with my foot. We're both grinning at the thought of a corral somewhere with little cubes of tofu wandering around. "Home, home on the range," I sing to her under my breath. "Where the deer and the tofu roam free ... — Heather Vogel Frederick

Every November, during the certain holiday people love so much, people take a dead turkey, open up the dead turkey's ass, or carve out a really big hole in their ass, take some stuffing and shove it inside their dead empty ass, and use the little dead ass as an oven to bake some bread. Somebody else's dead empty bacteria-laden ass to make bread? Ass bread?! And people think vegans are weird? Because we eat tofu? And rice, and beans, and lentils? — Gary Yourofsky

I really enjoy making dinner for my kids and my husband - chopping ginger and marinating the tofu. — Sadie Frost

This is reality, tofu man, because reality is what we carry in our hearts, and my heart is full of beauty just for you. — Dean Koontz

By itself, tofu is like wet foam rubber, but you'd no more eat it by itself and expect fine dining than you would stare at a blank canvas and expect to see fine art. — Victoria Moran

2 cups unbleached flour 1 cup rolled oats 1 Tbsp baking powder ½ tsp sea salt 1 cup sliced almonds ½ cup shredded coconut ½ cup chocolate chips 2 cups maple syrup 6 oz firm silken tofu (aseptic package) 1 ripe banana ½ cup saffower or sunflower oil ½ cup vegetable shortening 1 Tbsp vanilla — Tanya Petrovna

Valentine's Day is celebrated a little differently here in L.A. Nobody eats chocolate because of the calories, so people give each other tofu-shaped boxes filled with bean curd. Then they fantasize about what their Pilates instructor would be like if he was straight. — Craig Ferguson

New becomes stale and old becomes fresh. The impractical, ageing estate long ago left behind to Singapore's pioneers and their homemade tofu stalls takes on a certain irreverence and originality; an anarchic streak even. It goes against the architectural grain. It stands out in a crowd, a rebel with curves. The reclusive behaviour only adds to the appeal. So the old place becomes "hip". — Neil Humphreys

It's some twisted, limited, grocery-store mentality, where people have to be dairy products or vegetables or frozen foods for us to be able to understand them and feel safe. Maybe we've just become such mega-consumers that we can't deal with anything that's slightly inconvenient (basically, anything that requires thought). I was the tofu amidst the Baking Products and Cleaning Supplies. (pg. 71) — Deb Caletti

Anyone who suggests that there is a perfect symbiosis between the farmers' interest and the animals' is probably trying to sell you something (and it's not made of tofu) — Jonathan Safran Foer

My life is like tofu - it's what gets added that makes it interesting. — Angela Johnson

If you like to bake with eggs, you can substitute Ener-G egg replacer, bananas, tofu, or many other ingredients. You get the hang of it quickly enough. — Ingrid Newkirk

The biggest barrier to reanimating a flash-frozen body is preventing cell damage from ice crystals during the process. It's like what happens to frozen tofu: When you defrost it, it turns into a sponge. Oh, I guess most of you haven't head frozen tofu.' The expert, who was Chinese, smiled at the confused Western faces around him. — Liu Cixin

Power is a neutral energy source, like tofu. It's what you do with it that gives it flavor. — Elizabeth Gilbert

At work, we have fantastic catering people. They feed the cast and crew all day, and they're sensitive to the needs of picky vegetarians like me. They have delicious salads. I keep mine simple: romaine lettuce, avocado, baked tofu, carrots, tomatoes and Asian dressing. — Lisa Edelstein

The beautiful memories of tofu from when I was young — Onew

Nobody seems more obsessed by diet than our antimaterialist, otherworldly, New Age, spiritual types. But if the material world is merely illusion, an honest guru should as content with Budweiser and bratwurst as with raw carrot juice, tofu, and seaweed slime. — Edward Abbey

I'm vegetarian and stick to a strict health regime of brown rice, tofu, salads and soya milk. When I'm at home in Somerset, I buy almost everything in the local farmshops including Barleymow's in Chard. I always get organic - I like happy hens. — Kate O'Mara

Brains don't really smell, but what's amazing about the brain is that it's almost like scrambled eggs or soft tofu, almost like a gel. The brain controls so much of what we do, but you could put your finger right through it. — Ellen Pompeo

The mind is like tofu. By itself, it has no taste. Everything depends on the flavor of the marinade it steeps in. — Zalman Schachter-Shalomi

I love a good miso soup: it's fermented. It really helps with the immune system. I'll add tofu, carrots and seaweed. — Tia Mowry

From there, it was time for dinner: roaring fires, meat popping on spits, tofu sizzling on skillets ((it's northern California, a vegetarian option is not optional), and a style of eating and drinking that can only be described as quaffing. — Cory Doctorow

Honestly - who puts a hamburger next to diet tofu curry unless they're trying to buy your soul? — Amy Lane

Tofu hot dogs are actually scarier than real hot dogs. It's like wanting the worst possible meat product without even the thrill of it actually being meat. — Douglas Coupland

Every morning when I woke up, my mother was already in the kitchen making breakfast. It was always the same: steamed rice, pickled vegetables, grilled fish and miso soup. Each day there was something different in the soup such as tofu or potatoes. — Nobu Matsuhisa

So we believe. Leo has to be alive." "You remember the time in Detroit, when he flattened Ma Gasket with a car engine?" "Or those dwarfs in Bologna. Leo took them down with a homemade smoke grenade made from toothpaste." "Commander Tool Belt," Jason said. "Bad Boy Supreme," Piper said. "Chef Leo the Tofu Taco Expert." They laughed and told stories about Leo Valdez, their best friend. — Rick Riordan

Well, once I fried tofu and put Sriracha on it. After that I was so depressed I swore off preparing food for myself altogether. — Al Madrigal

Commander Tool Belt" Jason said.
"Bad Boy Supreme" Piper said.
"Chef Leo the Tofu Taco Expert."
They laughed and told stories about Leo valdez, their best friend. They stayed on the roof until dawn rose, and Piper started to believe they could have a fresh start. It might even be possible to tell a new story in which Leo was still out there.
Somewhere ... — Rick Riordan

If you buy an SUV, you're buying your safety at the expense of someone else's." ... If you're driving a Hyundai, which basically runs on air and tofu, and you get in an accident with an SUV, are you going to say, "Well, at least I have the courage of my convictions?" Hell, no. You're going to say: "Soon's I get outta this hospital bed and find my legs, I'm gonna get me a Suburban. Loaded. — Celia Rivenbark

My husband is such a healthy eater. Except when it comes to sweets. He never consumes anything except fruit until noon. And then from noon on he might have some brown rice and some tofu, and then, come eight or nine at night, he orders three mud-pie double-chocolate pieces of cake and eats all three of them. — Sara Blakely

Tofu is the root of all evil, and there's only one thing that can change a man's mind, and that's a modified Uzi with an extra-long clip. — Robert Downey Jr.