Quotes & Sayings About Parenthood Funny

Jenny Offill's Dept. of Speculation resembles no book I've read before. If I tell you that it's funny, and moving, and true; that it's as compact and mysterious as a neutron; that it tells a profound story of love and parenthood while invoking (among others) Keats, Kafka, Einstein, Russian cosmonauts, and advice for the housewife of 1896, will you please simply believe me, and read it? — Michael Cunningham

That looks like something out of the dumpster of planned parenthood. — Jim Norton

Parenthood is the passing of a baton, followed by a lifelong disagreement as to who dropped it. — Robert Breault

It is a sign of immaturity to believe that being older than someone (automatically) makes you more (mentally) mature than them. — Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Billy is a funny, cheeky, lovely boy and I love being with him. Parenthood is terrifying though. I can barely walk past a building without panicking that it's going to collapse on his head. — Rufus Sewell

Our parents would not be 'The best parents in the world' (to us) if they were not our parents. — Mokokoma Mokhonoana

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. — Rodney Dangerfield