Moffat Quotes & Sayings

To me, a 'brand' sounds evil. — Steven Moffat

Do what I do. Hold tight and pretend it's a plan!
- The Doctor, Season 7, Christmas Special — Steven Moffat

There was a goblin, or a trickster or a warrior. A nameless, terrible thing, soaked in the blood of a billion galaxies. The most feared being in all the cosmos. Nothing could stop it or hold it or reason with it. One day it would just drop out of the sky and tear down your world ... — Steve Moffat

Madness is just what a genius looks like to a tiny mind. — Steven Moffat

You'll go out of business if you think people are stupid. — Steven Moffat

With time we will all stop fighting pimples and start fighting wrinkles. — Moffat Machingura

The Doctor: It's my nose; it has special powers.
Nancy: Yeah? That why it's so ... ?
The Doctor: What?
Nancy: Nothing.
The Doctor: What?
Nancy: Nothing. Do your ears have special powers too? — Steven Moffat

Eleventh Doctor: [points in the War Doctor's TARDIS] Look ... the round things!
Tenth Doctor: Love the round things.
Eleventh Doctor: What are the round things?
Tenth Doctor: No idea. — Steven Moffat

I think there was a petition online to get me involved in 'Doctor Who.' I'm not a 'Doctor Who' fanatic, but I am a Steven Moffat fanatic. — Gina Bellman

People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but *actually* from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint - it's more like a big ball of wibbly wobbly ... time-y wimey ... stuff. — Steven Moffat

Hello, old friend. And here we are. You and me, on the last page. By the time you read these words, Rory and I will be long gone. So know that we lived well and were very happy. And above all else, know that we will love you always. Sometimes I do worry about you though. I think once we're gone you won't be coming back here for awhile. And you might be alone. Which you should never be. Don't be alone, Doctor. And do one more thing for me. There's a little girl waiting in a garden. She's going to wait a long while, so she's going to need a lot of hope. Go to her. Tell her a story. Tell her that if she's patient, the days are coming that she'll never forget. Tell her she'll go to see and fight pirates. She'll fall in love with a man who'll wait two thousand years to keep her safe. Tell her she'll give hope to the greatest painter who ever lived. And save a whale in outer space. Tell her, this is the story of Amelia Pond. And this is how it ends. — Steven Moffat

Let me tell you about scared. Your heart is beating so hard I can feel it through your hands. There's so much blood and oxygen pumping through your brain it's like rocket fuel. Right now you could run faster and you can fight harder. You can jump higher than ever in your life and you are so alert it's like you can slow down time.
What's wrong with scared? Scared is a superpower! Your superpower! There is danger in this room. And guess what? It's you. Do you feel it? Do you think he feels it? Do you think he's scared? Nah. Loser! — Steven Moffat

Never trust a hug. It's just a way to hide your face. — Steven Moffat

Today's problem is that people are quickly falling in love and falling out of it just as quickly. — Moffat Machingura

If every day you are not paying the
price to make your dreams come true,
then your everyday is a price that you
are paying to stop your dreams
coming true. — Moffat Machingura

Step into the future with focus
knowing that the only way to kill your
dream is trying to find another. — Moffat Machingura

The Doctor: Dr. Song, you've got that face on again.

River: What face?

The Doctor: The 'he's hot when he's clever' face.

River: This is my normal face.

The Doctor: Yes, it is. — Steven Moffat

We're thrilled to have Maisie Williams joining us on Doctor Who. It's not possible to say too much about who or what she's playing, but she is going to challenge the Doctor in very unexpected ways. This time he might just be out of his depth, and we know Maisie is going to give him exactly the right sort of hell. — Steven Moffat

Nothing can ever be a rule in drama, because then you're saying certain things won't ever happen, and that would be very boring. — Steven Moffat

Everything ends and it's always sad, but everything begins again, too. And that's always happy. Be happy. - Return of Doctor Mysterio — Steven Moffat

I think that's the way people absorb television. All the explanations in Doctor Who are there if that's your bag, but they're not essential to your enjoyment of it. An awful lot of storytelling isn't really about making people understand - it's about making people care. — Steven Moffat

River Song: Right then. I have questions, but number one is this - what in the name of sanity have you got on your head?
The Doctor: It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezzes are cool. — Steven Moffat

See the bowtie? I wear it and I don't care. That's why it's cool. — Steven Moffat

You can be as beautiful and charming as you'd like, but if you're not terrific at acting, it will mean nothing on the screen. — Steven Moffat

The whole purpose of the winepress
is to preserve the grapes. Accept
Pressing moments. What you
accomplish in a moment of pressure
will be used forever. — Moffat Machingura

Amy: "Can I come?"
Doctor: "Not safe in here, not yet. Five minutes. Give me five minutes and I'll be right back."
Amy: "People always say that."
Doctor: "Am I people? ... Do I even look like people? ... Trust me, I'm the Doctor. — Steven Moffat

Like most writers, I write about what has happened to me as that involves the minimum amount of research. — Steven Moffat

Have you met the French? My ... GOD they know how to party! — Steven Moffat

Rule 1: The Doctor lies. — Steven Moffat

If he is not going anywhere in life, then look him straight in the eyes and inform him that you are not going anywhere with him either. — Moffat Machingura

Loving for beauty is like vowing a lifetime commitment to a rose. No-matter how sweet-scented or pink "petald", every rose withers. — Moffat Machingura

To accomplish the best you can, first aim for the best you can't. — Moffat Machingura

The Doctor: Doctor Song, you've got that face on again.
River: What face?
The Doctor: The "He's hot when he's clever" face.
River: This is my normal face.
The Doctor: Yes it is.
River: Oh, shut up.
The Doctor: Not a chance. — Steven Moffat

Never knowingly be serious. Rule 27. — Steven Moffat

The Doctor: Amazing.
Nancy: What is?
The Doctor: 1941. Right now, not very far from here, the German war machine is rolling up the map of Europe. Country after country, falling like dominoes. Nothing can stop it, nothing. Until one tiny, damp little island says "No. No, not here." A mouse in front of a lion. You're amazing, the lot of you. I don't know what you do to Hitler, but you frighten the hell out of me. — Steven Moffat

Chairs are useful — Stephen Moffat

Never ignore a coincidence. Unless you're busy, in which case, always ignore a coincidence. — Steven Moffat

I like that Helen Mirren has been saying the next doctor should be a woman. I would like to go on record and say that the queen should be played by a man. — Steven Moffat

Clara Oswald: This is just a dream, but very clever people can hear dreams. So please, just listen. I know you're afraid, but being afraid is all right, because didn't anybody ever tell you fear is a superpower? Fear can make you faster and cleverer and stronger.
And one day, you'll come back to this barn and on that day you're going to be very afraid indeed. But that's ok because if you're very wise and very strong, fear doesn't have to make you cruel or cowardly. Fear can make you kind.
It doesn't matter if there's nothing under the bed or in the dark, so long as you know it's ok to be afraid of it. You're always going to be afraid, even if you learn to hide it. Fear is like a companion, a constant companion, always there. But that's ok, because fear can bring us together.
Fear can bring you home.
I'm going to leave you with something just so you always remember: Fear makes companions of us all. -Listen, Doctor Who, episode 8.4 — Steven Moffat

Moffat's prose is fine: clear and steady, with just enough sweeping statements about destiny and dragons to keep things well inflated. The characters are appealing archetypes: Fernwen the scholarly dwarf is the everynerd, doing his best to live through the adventure. Telemach Half-Blood is the hero you wish you could be. He always has a plan, always has a solution, always has secret allies that he can call upon - pirates and sorcerers whose allegiance he earn with long-ago sacrifices. — Robin Sloan

Maybe I'm in Hell. That's okay, I'm not scared of Hell - it's just Heaven for bad people. — Steven Moffat

Brainy's the new sexy. — Steven Moffat

Hitler: Thank you, whoever you are. I think you just saved my life.
The Doctor: Believe me ... It was an accident. — Steven Moffat

When writing comedy, you have to have the confidence to believe that there is only one type of relationship in the world, and we are all having it, that all men behave in the same way and so do all women. — Steven Moffat

This was supposed to be yesterday. I was sitting on the Cardiff/London train, supposedly about to write this very column, and realising something quite terrible. My head was entirely empty. A vast echoing void. Bigger on the inside, but with nothing in it. You could drop a pebble in my brain and wait for an hour to hear it land. No actually, you couldn't - that would be aggressive and unhelpful, so keep your damn pebbles to yourself. — Steven Moffat

I'll be a story in your head. But that's OK. We're all stories, in the end. Just make it a good one, eh? Because it was, you know; it was the best. — Steven Moffat

The Doctor: This is bad, I don't like this. [kicks console and yells in pain] Never use force, you just embarrass yourself. Unless you're cross, in which case ... always use force!
Amy: Shall I run and get the manual?
The Doctor: I threw it in a supernova.
Amy: You threw the manual in a supernova? Why?
The Doctor: Because I disagreed with it! Now stop talking to me when I'm cross! — Steven Moffat

Young Reinette: Monsieur, be careful!
The Doctor: It's just a nightmare, Reinette, don't worry, everyone has nightmares. Even monsters under the bed have nightmares!
Young Reinette: What do monsters have nightmares about?
The Doctor: Me! — Steven Moffat

Every success story has a secret,
Even if it's a love story. — Moffat Machingura

Cinema is so slow and boring compared to television. — Steven Moffat

Stories are where memories go when they are forgotten. — Steven Moffat

In the vast plain to the north I have sometimes seen, in the morning sun, the smoke of a thousand villages where no missionary has ever been. — Robert Moffat

- You are unarmed?
+ Always
- You stand alone?
+ Often
- You are the one who should be afraid.
+ Never
- Have a nice day then. — Stephen Moffat

Even the slash fiction, that's a great way to learn to work. No one really does three-act structure, but just trying to put words that make somebody else turned on, that's going to teach you more about writing than any writing college you can go to. — Steven Moffat

Bow ties are cool. — Steven Moffat

Rose: Look at you, beaming away like you're Father Christmas!
The Doctor: Who says I'm not, red-bicycle-when-you-were-twelve?
Rose: [shocked] What?
The Doctor: And everybody lives, Rose! Everybody lives! I need more days like this! Go on, ask me anything; I'm on fire! — Steven Moffat

Clearly," Jason said, "you are not doing nothing. You are most definitely doing something. What it looks like you're doing is pouring packets of sugar on Lauren Moffat's head."

Shhh," I said. "It's snowing. But only on Lauren." I shook more sugar out of the packets. "'Merry Christmas, Mr. Potter,'" I called softly down to Lauren in my best Jimmy Stewart imitation. "'Merry Christmas, you old building and Loan.'"

Jason started cracking up, and I had to hush him as Becca saw my sugar supply running low and hastened to hand me more packets.

Stop laughing so loud," I said to Jason. "You'll spoil this beautiful moment for them." I sprinkled more sugar over the side of the balcony. "'Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night. — Meg Cabot

The eyes are not the windows but the doors of the soul. Beware what may enter them. — Steven Moffat

I think like Joss Whedon [Stephen Moffat] often mistakes 'empowered' for 'strong in exactly the way I personally want to sleep with — Joseph Fink

Something like panic struck at Hurlow. Moffat's calm confession of fear withdrew the prop upon which he had leaned. Down there, among the motionless shadows, lurked invisible things, things that were nameless, shapeless and malignant; things which could see without being seen. One of the long lost terrors of childhood returned to him, and like a child he put his hand into Moffat's. — A.M. Burrage

My problem is that the audience is more fiction-literate than ever. In Shakespeare's day, you probably expected to see a play once or twice in your life; today you experience four or five different kinds of fiction every day. So staying ahead of the audience is impossible. — Steven Moffat

What's a horse doing on a spaceship"
"What's pre-revolutionary France doing on a spaceship? Mickey, get a little perspective!"
Dr. Who "The Girl In The Fireplace — Stephen Moffat

You should always waste time when you don't have any. Time is not the boss of you. Rule 408. — Steven Moffat

The Doctor: Oh, now what's this, then? I love this. A big, flashy-lighty thing. That's what brought me here. Big, flashy-lighty things have got me written all over them. Not actually, but give me time ... and a crayon. — Steven Moffat

Every episode [in a TV series] is a challenge, and what's challenging in most episodes is the monster. You're always a heartbeat from the monster looking ridiculous. You really have to work so hard to make them not look like ridiculous when they turn up on the set. — Steven Moffat

It's a funny thing about stories. It doesn't feel like you make them up, more like you find them. You type and type and you know you haven't got it yet, because somewhere out there, there's that perfect thing
the unexpected ending that was always going to happen. That place you've always been heading for, but never expected to go. — Steven Moffat

Do you know how you make someone into a Dalek? Subtract Love, add Anger. — Steven Moffat

Witty and mean is easy - but fond and funny is hard. — Steven Moffat

Beauty is a God-given talent that we should all conserve. — Moffat Machingura

The Doctor: [aiming gun at the ceiling] Didn't anyone ever tell you? There's one thing you never put in a trap if you're smart. If you value your continued existence, if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow, there's one thing you never, ever put in a trap.
Angel Bob: And what would that be, sir?
The Doctor: Me. [fires] — Steven Moffat

The trouble with a series as it gets older is it can feel like a tradition, and tradition is the enemy of suspense, and it's the enemy of comedy. It's the enemy of everything, really. So you have to shake it up. — Steven Moffat

I know this is going to sound very self-serving, and I apologize for it, but if you can write comedy, you can pretty much write anything, because it's the hardest. It's the most technically demanding, the most precisely evaluated form of writing. People know if it works or not. There's a big button marked 'fail,' and that's when nobody laughs. — Steven Moffat

Amy: I had something I wanted to tell him. Stuff always gets in the way.
Canton: Stuff does that. — Steven Moffat

Keep this straight in your head: we are not fighting an alien invasion we're leading a revolution . And today the battle begins. — Steven Moffat

Angel Bob: Doctor? Excuse me, hello, Doctor? Angel Bob here, sir.
The Doctor: Ah, there you are, Angel Bob. How's life? Sorry, bad subject.
Angel Bob: The Angels are wondering what you hope to achieve.
The Doctor: Achieve? We're not achieving anything. We're just hanging, it's nice in here: consoles; comfy chairs; a forest ... how's things with you?
Angel Bob: The Angels are feasting, sir. Soon we will be able to absorb enough power to consume this vessel, this world, and all the stars and worlds beyond.
The Doctor: Yeah, but we've got comfy chairs. Did I mention?
Angel Bob: We have no need for comfy chairs.
The Doctor: [amused] I made him say 'comfy chairs'. — Steven Moffat

I'd forgotten not all victories are about saving the universe. — Steven Moffat

It happened on a Valentine night.
Chris was an expert panther, a James Bond. Sarah was a lamb, a Virgin Mary.
It was a night of mixed feelings and inner conflict. In her flesh she felt walking on liquid gold; but in her mind, heart and soul she could not help but hate herself for partaking of this "forbidden fruit" of pleasure. Not long was the thrill gone that her soul went sinking in the quick sands of condemnation, "did you have to do it? — Moffat Machingura

In life we do not attract what we want, we attract who we are. — Moffat Machingura

Time travel is always more magical somehow when you go into the past. Traveling into the future is something you do, every day. You're just not going to get very far. So, I rather like the past travel. — Steven Moffat

Between the marriages, I shagged my way round television studios like a mechanical digger. — Steven Moffat

If neither crying nor laughing can change my circumstances, then I rather go through them laughing. — Moffat Machingura

In bed above, we're deep asleep.
While greater love lies further deep.
This dream must end,
The world must know,
We all depend on the beat below. — Steven Moffat

Don't play games with me! You just killed someone I like, that is not a safe place to stand! I'm the Doctor, and you're in the biggest library in the Universe. Look me up. — Steven Moffat

Dinner with Steven Moffat in Bar Shu, spent mostly in enthusiastic Dr Who neepery. I love my life ... As a side note, running Windows Vista on the Panasonic w7 is making me really nostalgic for 1986. Whoever thought I'd get to type things then stare at a blank screen for a bit and one-by-one watch the letters appear? Cory and Mike's 'Why Don't You Run Linux?' talks are staring to seem much more sensible. — Neil Gaiman

I can say with pride verging on smugness that I've got two very successful shows that assume their audience is very smart. — Steven Moffat

Crying makes problems seem longer, and laughing makes problems seem shorter. Therefore in life if you cannot find a way out of your problems just take a short cut through them: that shortcut is
laughter. — Moffat Machingura

Madame Kovarian: The anger of a good man is not a problem. Good men have too many rules.
The Doctor: Good men don't need rules. Today is not the day to find out why I have so many. — Steven Moffat

Well we've moved through the funfair a bit - we've done the rollercoaster, now we're on the ghost train. — Steven Moffat

If anyone said to me 'invent a new monster so we can sell more toys', I'd kick them out of my office. — Steven Moffat

Rory: Amy. I'm gonna need a little help here.
Amy: Just stop it!
Rory: Just think it through, this will work. This will kill the Angels.
Amy: it will kill you too.
Rory: Will it? River said that this place would be erased from time, never existed. If this place never existed what did I fall off?
Amy: You think you'll just come back to life.
Rory: When don't I?
Amy: Rory -
Rory: Anyway, what else is there? Dying of old age downstairs, never seeing you again? Amy, please. If you love me, then trust me and push.
Amy: I can't.
Rory: You have to!
Amy: Could you? Could you if it was me? Could you do it?
Rory: To save you, I could do anything.
Amy: Prove it.
Rory: But I can't take you too.
Amy: You said we'd come back to life. Money-where-your-mouth-is time.
Rory: Amy, but -
Amy: Shut. Up. Together. Or not at all

-Doctor Who — Steven Moffat

[The Doctor, Capt. Jack and Rose are cornered by the empty children.]
The Doctor: Go to your room! Go to your room! I mean it. I'm very, very angry with you. I'm very, very cross! GO! TO! YOUR! ROOM! [The children lurch away and obey him.] I'm really glad that worked. Those would have been terrible last words. — Steven Moffat

I can't see what's wrong about assuming intelligence in your audience and what's bad news about being rewarded for assuming that. — Steven Moffat

I absolutely love television, and I don't mean to be vulgar, but as I keep having to explain to people from the movie industry, I get more power and more money doing television, so why on earth would I do a film? — Steven Moffat

It's been a long time since Sherlock Holmes jumped off that roof - it's time to reveal the truth about what happened between him and the pavement. — Steven Moffat

It's the 50th year of Doctor Who and look what's going on! We're up in the sky and under the sea! We're running round the rings of an alien world and then a haunted house. There's new Cybermen, new Ice Warriors and a never before attempted journey to the centre of the TARDIS. And in the finale, the Doctor's greatest secret will at last be revealed! If this wasn't already our most exciting year it would be anyway! — Steven Moffat

As we all know, it is the proper duty of every British subject to come to the aid of the TARDIS. — Steven Moffat

Myself and Jamie Moffat did not agree on everything but he always knew I had the experience. — Jim Jefferies

It's been four years. It's been the best four years. It's been wonderful, it's been a privilege to work under Steven Moffat. But I think when you gotta go, you gotta go It's sad, I'm going to miss it. I'm going to miss Comic-Con as well. It wasn't an easy decision, but I dunno, you can't play it forever. And, look, they'll get someone amazing and brilliant, and that's the great thing about the show. It continues, and it will get bigger and better. And you'll forget about me. — Matt Smith

You know when sometimes you meet someone so beautiful - and then you actually talk with them, and five minutes later they're as dull as a brick. But then there's other people, and you meet them and you think: "Not bad, they're okay," and then you get to know them, and their face sort of becomes them, like their personality's written all over it; and they just - and they turn into something so beautiful. [Simultaneously, with Older Amy] Rory is the most beautiful man I've ever met. — Steven Moffat

When I started Doctor Who Steven Moffat said, "That's it for the rest of your life." I'll be Doctor to a whole generation when they're 50. — Matt Smith