Funny Bell Quotes & Sayings

Some things just strike me as funny. The way things play out just makes me laugh sometimes. It drives my wife crazy sometimes because I'll just be laughing for no reason. — W. Kamau Bell

You can edit crap, but you can't edit nothing. — Anita Bell

Aren't faeries supposed to be, like, really tiny? With wings and a wand and faerie dust?"

"I'm not Tinker Bell! — Rachel Morgan

He laughed and I did too, it was funny and horribly painful and deeply aching all at once. Like the laughter echoed and because of that you knew you were hollow. — Audrey Bell

I always tend to remember the funny moments. When I lost my shoe (even though it was funny) there was something motivating about it, I just ended in this spastic emotional way. I tend to remember the more extreme moments. — Laura Bell Bundy

I love nerds. Comic-Con junkies are the tastemakers of tomorrow. Isn't that funny? The tables have turned. — Kristen Bell

It's funny: when you're tranquil, you will seem to radiate light, and if someone were to paint a portrait of you like that, I'd insist that they include the halo. But when you're unhappy, you will become a klaxon, built for radiating sound; a portrait of you then could simply be a fire alarm bell. — Ted Chiang

It's weird how an actor can read a script and think 'it's really good, it's really funny, that's going to be really dramatic ... ' and then you get there and say: "Oh, I have to get in it? I have to get in the water?! Are you kidding?" — Jamie Bell

There was a fire drill at school the next day. I think I'm more afraid of the fire alarm than I am of a fire. When the fire alarm goes off, you jump out of your skin. Your heart pounds and your ears buzz and your brain melts and all you want to do is get away from that horrible noise. "Get up and walk quickly out the door and to your right," said Mr. Dooley. "Do not pass go and do not collect two hundred dollars," said Donald. I held my hands over my ears to drown out the fire alarm. Outside we stood around waiting for the bell that means we could come back in again. "Yay! The roof is on fire! No more school!" someone joked. "Anybody got a match?" said someone else. Mr. Dooley said that wasn't funny. He said if there really was a fire, we'd be smart to know what to do. — Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

I look at the names on the mailboxes and the bells inside number 1940 and pick out a couple of women's names and press the first one. I stand there waiting, feeling the image
build up and not thinking about what I'm going to say to her because I know
something will come to me like it always does. Nothing happens. I press the second doorbell and in a few minutes she buzzes the door, twice, and I walk into the hallway. The stairs are curved around an elevator and to the right and I go up them, not in a hurry or nothing, just taking them one at a time.
Its funny, isn't it, how the first woman didn't answer the bell or wasn't home or something and just that little chance, you understand what I mean? — Sebastian Junger

I shrugged. "Actually, I didn't tell her much of anything. She must've put two and two together all on her own and come up with you being a jerk face."
His gaze slid back to me and he grinned. "Ouch, shortie."
"Yeah, like that really bothered you." I glanced back through the small window in the door that led to bio. Mr. Tucker was already at his desk - was Mrs. Cleo ever coming back? - and we only had a minute, tops, before the tardy bell rang. "What did you want?"
Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a thin slip of yellow paper, waving it in my face. "Guess what I found?"
"Obviously not a better personality," I remarked.
"Ha. Funny." He brushed the edge of the paper across my nose and smiled when I smacked it away. — Jennifer L. Armentrout

Noah held my hand and my bag as he escorted me to the third floor - the Women's Pavilion. The elevator bell rang and the doors opened.
"Jesus, Echo, circulation in my hand would be a good thing," said Noah.
"Sorry." I tried to let go, but Noah kept his fingers linked with mine. — Katie McGarry

If Duncan was ever into men then he's been so far in the closet he's been living in Narnia. — Dana Marie Bell

I rang the bell of this small bed-and breakfast place, whereupon a lady appeared at an outside window. "What do you want?", she asked. "I want to stay here", I replied. "Well, stay there then", she said and closed the window. — Chic Murray

I was scrolling through my Twitter feed one day, and somebody had tweeted me a picture of Justin Bieber that had been Photoshopped with makeup or something. And I thought it was funny and so I hit retweet - I just retweeted a tweet - and all of a sudden, the remarks were coming in. — Drake Bell

Just because a guy rings your bell, doesn't mean you have to toot his horn. — C.C. Hunter

I think real humans are so complicated, and often [characters] are written more one-dimensional without maybe even the writer knowing it. I've felt numerous moments in my life where my most confident moment and my most insecure moment were exactly the same time. There's nothing funny or interesting about perfection. — Kristen Bell

Often in my lectures when I use the phrase "imperialist white-supremacist capitalist patriarchy" to describe our nation's political system, audiences laugh. No one has ever explained why accurately naming this system is funny. The laughter is itself a weapon of patriarchal terrorism. — Bell Hooks

Novels are not about expressing yourself, they're about something beautiful, funny, clever and organic. Self-expression? Go and ring a bell in a yard if you want to express yourself. — Zadie Smith

I actually met Larson [Paine] on Larchmont in Los Angeles. He was eating and he stopped me because I was massaging my larynx. I was doing a show and trying to loosen up my throat. He had sort of this southern vibe about eating alone and talking to people. And it was funny because I had just having eaten with Larry O'Keefe and Nell Benjamin. — Laura Bell Bundy

A modest ring at the bell at length allayed her fears, and Miss Benton, hurrying into her own room and shutting herself up, in order that she might preserve that appearance of being taken by surprise which is so essential to the polite reception of visitors, awaited their coming with a smiling countenance. — Charles Dickens

I've been very lucky to work with people I think are funny and who are really awesome human beings. — Jillian Bell

Good." He grinned.
"I was kind of worried you'd say no. It's like so against the rules it's not even funny."
I smiled. "Well. I have to say, Jack Diamond, you've demonstrated a deplorable lack of respect for all of my rules."
He chuckled. "Never met a rule I couldn't break. — Audrey Bell

In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence. — Steven Wright

And you are going to close the gates, because I told you to close the gates. — Hilari Bell

What's the trick to writing a genuinely funny comedy? The trick is therapy. Take notes. — Lake Bell

Sergent Earl Hale sent us out to get transportation. We went out to look for what we could find.

We came across Hitler's car, but it had no wheels. We found a bus, but it wouldn't start. We saw a fire truck and took that. On the way back to camp we had a wonderful time ringing the bell. Hale was upset. He didn't want a fire truck.


- Henry Zimmerman — Marcus Brotherton

I kind of don't believe in actors directing themselves. Obviously some people have done it well, but I don't see how I could. It's funny that you ask, because I've just been thinking that maybe I'd rather direct The Bell Jar than act in it. It's a huge leap to go from a short to a feature, so I'm tentative - I'm like, Well, that's just so triple-type-A personality of you. — Julia Stiles

There are a lot of funny people and a lot of unfunny people. Some of them are women and some of them are dudes. — Lake Bell

Funny how any sentence that started with "honestly" usually wasn't. — Jay Bell

I take my food very seriously. Whenever I hear that bell, I know Mrs. Norris is hankerin' for some spam. — Sandy Ward Bell

People are always surprised that I have a funny side because I'm usually so intense, strong and dramatic. But, I'd love to do something really, really silly and funny. — Catherine Bell

I'd been to New York enough to know that it wasn't always easy to find a place to walk a dog in the middle of Manhattan, so I headed to the hotel's bell stand to look for some guidance. "Where can I find some grass around here?" I asked. The porter paused for a second, as he seemed to size me up. Then he replied: "Hey man, you're in the middle of Times Square. You can buy it from just about anyone out there." That was pretty funny. Dakota, I've a feeling we're not in Plano anymore, I thought. — Mike Lingenfelter

I am lactose intolerant, and I always thought it was really funny how people who are lactose intolerant continue to eat dairy, because they like it so much. And I find it not acceptable. — Lake Bell

I wrote an entire movie [Man up] about how important I think voices are, so it was funny. — Lake Bell

It's really funny because the same people who loved me as Stringer Bell were the same people that were watching 'Daddy's Little Girls' literally in tears. — Idris Elba

Here. There. Everywhere." He leered at his friend. "Thinking about you and Moira's
underwear. — Dana Marie Bell

You talked to your mother about Duncan's erectile dysfunction?" He glared down at her. "Has he considered taking your TV away? — Dana Marie Bell

I always find it funny when people say, "I don't really like classical music" or "it doesn't do anything for me." I tell them, "Well, you know, it does. You go to films and you're responding to it, and you've heard it ... " It's controlling you! So don't think you're not being affected. It's a great medium for music. — Joshua Bell

As I observe my daily life and that of others, I have come to the conclusion that genuine joy is a potent mixture of harsh reality, and the realization that life can be funny. — Tone Bell

Gary Bell is nicknamed Ding Dong. Of course. What's interesting about it is that "Ding Dong" is what the guys holler when somebody gets hit in the cup. The cups are metal inserts that fit inside the jock strap, and when a baseball hits one it's called ringing the bell, which rhymes with hell, which is what it hurts like. It's funny, even if you're in the outfield, or in the dugout, no matter how far away, when a guy gets it in the cup you can hear it. Ding Dong. — Jim Bouton

Coordinating the retreat was important too, so important that Jiaan had assigned Aram as Fasal's assistant, to be sure he didn't overlook anything important. Like the fact that they were supposed to retreat. — Hilari Bell

Corvid looked up at her. "Oh, hello Doris."
"Gertie, dear," she said. "They call me Gertie."
"You used to be Doris," Corvid said as a matter of fact.
"Who?" She seemed unsure of what she was being told.
"Doris, daughter of Oceanus and Tethys?" Corvid carried on when he saw her blank expression. "You must remember Nereus? Your husband?"
Nothing.
"You gave birth to fifty sea nymphs. I guess sea nymphs come out slippy and hydrodynamic, but even so, fifty of them? That must stick in the memory as the day before you felt really sore for a month or so?"
Doris thought about it for a moment. "It does ring a bell. Sorry, who are you? — Dylan Perry

There's lots of sides. The CD doesn't really create a mood. It creates more of a journey. It starts out with a simple bluegrass tune, sort of melancholy and sad, like "Lovin' and Lyin'," then it's sexy and there's some funny songs in there where I'm talking, like "Designated Drunk." There's a humor side, a sexy side, but there's also a pretty sad side, the country side. It's the backwards side of me! — Laura Bell Bundy

The funny thing is that I'm not a planner. I have no idea what I want to do in the interim of that 50 years, but I tell ya: That's where you'll find me in my last performance. — Kristen Bell