Quotes & Sayings About Forgiving Self

In forgiving others, I free myself towards belonging and wholeness, be it with the person I am forgiving, or with myself. — Sharon Weil

The more you are able to forgive then the more you are able to love. — Stephen Richards

The reason for forgiving your enemies is not for their benefit but for your own benefit. Holding grudges against other people doesn't hurt them; doesn't even bother them much - in fact, even pleases them if they are still mad at you. It is not in your enlightened self-interest to hold grudges, regardless of whether it bothers the person you hate or not. — Brad Blanton

Think of people you consider fanatical. They're overbearing, self-righteous, opinionated, insensitive, and harsh. Why? It's not because they are too Christian, it's because they are not Christian enough. They are fanatically zealous and courageous, but they are not fanatically humble, sensitive, loving, emphatic, forgiving, or understanding- as Christ was ... What strikes us as overly fanatical is actually a failure to be fully committed to Christ and his gospel. — Timothy Keller

Self-realization, which leads to purity of the soul, requires forgiving our enemies and working on the most horrendous modules of oneself. — Kilroy J. Oldster

In solitude I get rid of my scaffolding ...
Solitude molds self-righteous people into gentle, caring, forgiving persons who are so deeply convinced of their own great sinfulness and so fully aware of God's even greater mercy that their life itself becomes ministry. — Henri J.M. Nouwen

Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying machines. Your mother was programmed to bawl out your father for being a defective moneymaking machine, and your father was programmed to bawl out your mother for being a defective housekeeping machine. They were programmed to bawl each other out for being defective loving machines. Then your father was programmed to stomp out of the house and slam the door. This automatically turned your mother into a weeping machine. And your father would go down to the tavern where he would get drunk with some other drinking machines. Then all the drinking machines would go to a whorehouse and rent fucking machines. And then your father would drag himself home to become an apologizing machine. And your mother would become a very slow forgiving machine. — Kurt Vonnegut

The narratives we create in order to justify our actions and choices become in so many ways who we are. They are the things we say back to ourselves to explain our complicated lives. Perhaps the reason you've not yet been able to forgive yourself is that you're still invested in your self-loathing. Perhaps not forgiving yourself is the flip side of your stealing-this-now cycle. Would you be a better or worse person if you forgave yourself for the bad things you did? If you perpetually condemn yourself for being a liar and a thief, does that make you good? — Cheryl Strayed

Forgiving yourself can prove as difficult as licking a scab off your elbow. — Richelle E. Goodrich

All we have to do is to receive what we are given ... We are given the naturalness to love someone, to be calm in crisis, to ignore self-defeating suggestions, to be pleasant, forgiving, tender, helpful, unworried, brave, energetic. — Vernon Howard

Embrace and love all of yourself - past, present, and future. Forgive yourself quickly and as often as necessary. Encourage yourself. Tell yourself good things about yourself. — Melody Beattie

We wind up in cells of our own making when we're not generous, loving, compassionate, and forgiving. Without love we build dungeons in our hearts and fill them with our perceived enemies. We believe they deserve to be there for the harm they've caused us. But by imprisoning them we're destroying our own spirits. When our dungeons are overflowing with these prisoners we refuse to set free, we become slaves to our self-righteousness, our anger, resentments, and self-loathing, which we let multiply until we wind up imprisoned on our own death row. — Martin Sheen

To forgive is indeed the best form of self-interest since anger, resentment, and revenge are corrosive of that summum bonum, the greatest good. — Desmond Tutu

N our perfection-obsessed, air-brushed society, it can be tempting to measure our self-worth against its set of impossible standards. However, organic beauty is in the flaws that make us vulnerable, human and fallible. We are here to learn, evolve and grow. We do not need to become perfect to be worthy of love, there is no such thing. We can not love others when we are withholding love and acceptance from ourselves. We can not criticize ourselves and then reach with open arms to give and receive love from others. It has to start from within, radiating outward. We need to learn how to be unconditionally loving, accepting and forgiving of ourselves, first, if we wish to forge healthy and loving relationships with others. — Jaeda DeWalt

How easy it is to forgive and loose the most violent offender, when in tears, they repent. How difficult it is forgiving our own self, for the eyes of our reflection will always expose our untold sins. — Stefanie Schneider

Do not be deceived that you are weak because you have forgiven; instead be rest assured that you are now showing great strength - after all, forgiving is one of the most difficult things to do. — Stephen Richards

Most people focus on forgiving others, thinking there isn't a need for self-forgiveness, particularly if they see themselves as a victim. — Liane Holliday Willey

Only through forgiving can we understand that there is nothing and no one to forgive. And that we too, if we have hurt someone, have been for them, nothing more than an instrument of Love in the same way they have been for us. In the Oneness there is no separation, no judgment, and everything happens in Divine Perfection. — Human Angels

Happy people generally are more forgiving, helpful, and charitable, have better self-control, and are more tolerant of frustration than unhappy people, while unhappy people are more often withdrawn, defensive, antagonistic, and self-absorbed. Oscar Wilde observed, One is not always happy when one is good; but one is always good when one is happy. — Gretchen Rubin

Be gentle and forgiving with yourself, abandon any and all shame, and refuse to engage in any self-repudiation. — Wayne Dyer

We might say that there can be pity in its full-fledged form only where there is also mercy for self: for the self engulfed by a sense of its own utter blackness can never win through to a sufficient recognition of the sorrows of the other as other. — Martha C. Nussbaum

It is not unreasonable to want repentance from a wrongdoer before forgiving that wrongdoer, since, in the absence of repentance, hasty forgiveness may harm both the forgiver and the wrongdoer. The forgiver may be harmed by a failure to show self-respect. The wrongdoer may be harmed by being deprived of an important incentive - the desire to be forgiven - that could move him toward repentance and moral rebirth. — Jeffrie G. Murphy

The truth is, forgiving is a rather simple concept to grasp. It is often imagined that when you forgive, you have to reconcile with someone and yet this is a larger team in which forgiveness is just a player. — Stephen Richards

One great help here - and I make no claim that it is the only help or even a necessary condition for forgiveness - is sincere repentance on the part of the wrongdoer. When I am wronged by another, a great part of the injury - over and above any physical harm I may suffer - is the insulting or degrading message that has been given to me by the wrongdoer: the message that I am less worthy than he is, so unworthy that he may use me merely as a means or object in service to his desires and projects. Thus failing to resent(or hastily forgiving) the wrongdoer runs the risk that I am endorsing that very immoral message for which the wrongdoer stands. If the wrongdoer sincerely repents, however, he now joins me in repundiating the degrading and insulting message - allowing me to relate to him (his new self) as an equal without fear that a failure to resent him will be read as a failure to resent what he hs done. — Jeffrie G. Murphy

Love is the ability to live your life with an empowered heart without attachment to the outcome, the ability within yourself to distinguish within yourself between love and fear and choose love regardless of what is going on inside yourself or outside. This is self-mastery or authentic power ... that means you become clear, forgiving, humble and loving ... you are grounded in harmony, cooperating, sharing and reverence for life. — Gary Zukav

But not forgiving yourself often becomes the root of severe self-loathing extreme self hatred and intense inhibitions. It will be next to impossible to truly start over when you feel unforgivable. — Sue Augustine

Decide to forgive: For resentment is negative; resentment is poisoning; resentment diminishes and devours the self. — Robert Muller

When you initially forgive, it is like letting go of a hot iron. There is initial pain and the scars will show, but you can start living again. — Stephen Richards

Are you aware that a healthy level of self-esteem is directly related to your ability to forgive yourself and others? It is. How so, you may ask? When you accept that you are no better or worse than anyone else and that you're not perfect and neither is anyone else you'll see the wisdom and reasonableness of forgiving yourself and others. A healthy level of self-esteem will also enable you to take responsibility for your words and actions and establish and maintaining healthy personal boundaries. The more you appreciate and respect yourself the more you'll be able to appreciate and respect others and others will find it easy to appreciate and respect you. — George Araiza

As women, we almost never give ourselves enough credit for what we're capable of, for what we endure and how giving we are.
Part of loving yourself is about forgiving yourself - which is something I've always struggled with. It's the messy parts that make us human, so we should embrace them too - pat ourselves on the back for getting through them rather than being angry for having gotten into them in the first place. Because loving yourself is ultimately about self-acceptance, about embracing every part of who you are. And that's never just one thing. — Jennifer Lopez

You're human. You'll screw up. Denying that is crazy. Forgiving yourself has all the benefits of self-esteem without making you a narcissist that's out of touch with reality. — David D. Burns

During the year of 2015 stay grounded. How? Each night before you go to sleep, write a word/expression capturing a positive state of mind on a sheet of paper. Fold the paper in a V and prop it on your nightstand beside your bed so you will see it the first thing in the morning.
When you wake up, look at the word, put the word into your mind and feel it/express it throughout the day, no matter what happens to you that day. Examples are: appreciation, look for the positive in others and events; happy, worthiness, creative, cheerful, forgiving, gratitude, letting go of your ego and focus on others, selfless, love, kindness, etc. — J.F. Kelly

I think seriousness is a mask of self-importance and self-importance in turn is a mask for self-pity. So if you're really going to pursue a spiritual way of living in the world, you must be lighthearted and carefree, have humor, be able to tolerate ambiguity and embrace uncertainty, and be forgiving of yourself and everybody else. — Deepak Chopra

Forgive yourself. The supreme act of forgiveness is when you can forgive yourself for all the wounds you've created in your own life. Forgiveness is an act of self-love. When you forgive yourself, self-acceptance begins and self-love grows. — Miguel Angel Ruiz

The soul of me is very selfish. I have gone my way after a fashion that made me the center of the plan. And you who are so individual, who are so independent a spirit, whose soul is also a kingdom, have been so loyal, so forgiving, so self-sacrificing in your willingness to live my life. Nothing but love cold have accomplished so wonderful a thing. — Woodrow Wilson

You are not, though, forgiving so as to let others off with things. You are forgiving so that you can empower yourself to get over it and become strong. — Stephen Richards

Any fool can criticize, complain, and condemn - and most fools do. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving. — Dale Carnegie

When we forgive and let go, not only does a huge weight drop off your shoulders, but the doorway to your own self-love opens. — Louise Hay

Self-confidence is not pride. Just the contrary: only a person or a nation that is self-confident, in the best sense of the word, is capable of listening to others, accepting them as equals, forgiving its enemies and regretting its own guilt. — Vaclav Havel

To forgive a fault in another is more sublime than to be faultless one's self. — George Sand

But isn't a life based on seeking personal happiness by nature self-centered, even self-indulgent? Not necessarily. In fact, survey after survey has shown that it is unhappy people who tend to be most self-focused and are often socially withdrawn, brooding, and even antagonistic. Happy people, in contrast, are generally found to be more sociable, flexible, and creative and are able to tolerate life's daily frustrations more easily than unhappy people. And, most important, they are found to be more loving and forgiving than unhappy people. — Dalai Lama XIV

We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving ... We pride ourselves on getting as little sleep as possible and thrive on self-deprivation. We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins ... We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We never want to be as passive-aggressive as our mothers, never want to marry men as uninspired as our fathers ... We are the daughters of the feminists who said, "You can be anything," and we heard, "You have to be everything. — Courtney Martin

Praise Roxane Gay for her big-hearted self-examining intelligence, for her inclusive and forgiving stance, for her courage and determination ... for saying out loud the things we were thinking, for guiding us back to ourselves and returning to us what was ours all along. — Pam Houston

Judgment is not the last word; it is never the last word. Judgment is necessary because of centuries of hardheartedness; its proper work is to open our hearts to the reality beyond ourselves, to crack the carapace of self-sufficiency so that we can experience the inrushing grace of the healing, merciful, forgiving God. — Eugene H. Peterson

We can enhance our life by forgiving our self and others. — Kishore Bansal

I truly believe that forgiveness is the fast track to greater love and it's the path that can really heal all. We all have areas of our own lives where we have a hard time forgiving, whether it's with ourselves, or others, but when we can practice forgiveness, many of our self-destructive habits will begin to fade away. — Marci Shimoff

I did then what I knew best, when I knew better, I did better. Maya Angelo — Maya Angelou

Allowing one's self to be forgiven is just as hard as forgiving. Harder in some ways. Because to be forgiven, one first has to admit to being at fault. — Laura Lippman

A broken friendship that is mended through forgiveness can be even stronger than it once was. — Stephen Richards

Offended self-love never forgives. — Giovanni Ruffini

Do you think that, by nature, human beings are forgiving?" "I think that, by nature, human beings are self-protective," said Hanratty. "If it is in their interest to be forgiving, then they are. If not, then they are vengeful. I am fairly certain that being forgiving is not an innate virtue. — Betsy Carter

What do you do when you don't know what to do about something?
I talk to Mr. Sugar and my friends. I make lists. I attempt to analyze the situation from the perspective of my "best self" - the one that's generous, reasonable, forgiving, loving, bighearted, and grateful. I think really hard about what I'll wish I did a year from now. I map out the consequences of the various actions I could take. I ask what my motivations are, what my desires are, what my fears are, what I have to lose, and what I have to gain. I move toward the light, even if it's a hard direction in which to move. I trust myself. I keep the faith. I mess up sometimes. — Cheryl Strayed

Complex thinkers attempt to extend to others the same self-forgiving bias that they offer themselves. — Ted Cadsby

The practice of forgiving is a sequential practice that begins with excusing someone. — Stephen Richards

Forgiving is an inward act that establishes outer boundaries; it is an undefeatable triumph of self-compassion that proclaims you are no longer a victim. — Bryant McGill

Awakening is the experience of forgiving the illusion of manifesting, for Identity Is Spirit. Christ comes not into form, but calls you out of the world to recognize your Self as eternal Spirit. — David Hoffmeister

If your fundamental is a man dying on the cross for his enemies, if the very heart of your self-image and your religion is a man praying for his enemies as he died for them, sacrificing for them, loving them - if that sinks into your heart of hearts, it's going to produce the kind of life that the early Christians produced. The most inclusive possible life out of the most exclusive possible claim - and that is this is the truth. But what is the truth? The truth is a God become weak, loving and dying for the people who opposed him, dying forgiving them. — Timothy Keller