Quotes & Sayings About Calvin And Hobbes

A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do. — Bill Watterson

County library? Reference desk, please. Hello? Yes, I need a word definition. Well, that's the problem. I don't know how to spell it and I'm not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I'll stop you when ... Hello? — Bill Watterson

Calvin: Know what I pray for?
Hobbes: What?
Calvin: The strength to change what I can, the inability to accept what I can't, and the incapacity to tell the difference. — Bill Watterson

Mom says death is as natural as birth, and it's all part of the life cycle.
She says we don't really understand it, but there are many things we don't understand, and we just have to do the best we can with the knowledge we have.
I guess that makes sense. — Bill Watterson

I have all these great genes, but they're recessive. That's the problem here. — Bill Watterson

The way Calvin's brain is wired you can almost hear the fuses blowing. — Bill Watterson

Everyone says how Calvin and Hobbes is about a real kid, to me there's nothing real about it; it's an adult using a kid's body as a mouthpiece. — Bill Griffith

The best presents don't come in boxes. — Bill Watterson

It's gratifying to hear that from people who care about comic art. I never know what to make of it when someone writes to say, "Calvin and Hobbes is the best strip in the paper. I like it even more than Nancy." — Bill Watterson

Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him? — Bill Watterson

This is where dad burried the little raccoon.
I don't even know he existed a few days ago and now he's gone forever. It's like I found him for no reason. I had to say good-bye as soon as I said hello.
Still ... in a sad, awful, terrible way, I'm happy I met him.
What a stupid world. — Bill Watterson

Idiocy is the essence of the male mind. — Bill Watterson

I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness. — Bill Watterson

I'm resolving to just wing it and see what happens. — Bill Watterson

For the uninitiated, 'Calvin and Hobbes' is a daily comic strip detailing the antics of an unruly six-year-old and his misanthropic stuffed tiger. The boy, whose vocabulary is packed with more 10-dollar words than a GRE flashcard set, is named after John Calvin, the Reformation-era theologian who preached the doctrine of predestination. — Anthony Marra

I'M SIGNIFICANT!!!
...
Say's the dust speck. — Bill Watterson

So you must have seen the article on them today."
"Not yet, but I was just about to take a break. Gotta have my Dilbert fix."
"Is that the one about the office? I was a Calvin and Hobbes fan for years. Hated to see that stop and haven't really gotten into any of the new ones. Guess I'm behind the times."
"You like what you like. Nothing wrong with that."
"That's what my wife says." De la Cruz's eyes drifted around again. "So, a couple people said both of them came into this club last night."
"Calvin and Hobbes? One was a kid and the other a tiger. Neither would have gotten past my bouncers."

-De La Cruz & Xhex — J.R. Ward

I've always just loved drawing and loved cartoons. Growing up, I loved Disney films, I loved The Simpsons, and I was a big fan of the comic strip Calvin & Hobbes and the way that they would have weird fantasy and then down-to-earth funny character comedy. — Alex Hirsch

When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back. — Bill Watterson

The best proof of extraterrestrial intelligence is that they haven't contacted us. — Bill Watterson

You know, sometimes the world seems like a pretty mean place.'
'That's why animals are so soft and huggy. — Bill Watterson

I'm learning real skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life ... procrastinating and rationalizing. — Bill Watterson

Life is like topography, Hobbes. There are summits of happiness and success, flat stretches of boring routine and valleys of frustration and failure. — Bill Watterson

Calvin: I used to hate writing assignments, but now I enjoy them. I realized that the purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure poor reasoning, and inhibit clarity. With a little practice, writing can be an intimidating and impenetrable fog! Want to see my book report?
Hobbes: (Reading Calvin's paper) "The Dynamics of Interbeing and Monological Imperatives in Dick and Jane: A Study in Psychic Transrelational Gender modes."
Calvin: Academia, here I come! — Bill Watterson

They say the secret of success is being at the right place at the right time, but since you never know when the right time is going to be, I figure the trick is to find the right place and just hang around. — Bill Watterson

Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I'd say our afternoon just got booked solid! — Bill Watterson

I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin — Bill Watterson

Reality continues to ruin my life. — Bill Watterson

Sometimes when I'm talking, my words can't keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we think faster than we speak. Probably so we can think twice. — Bill Watterson

Wake up, get up ... Shut up. Listen up ... Throw up ... Mix up, Goof up ... Hurry up ... "
"How's your day?"
"Looking up. — Bill Watterson

If I had rolled along with the strip's popularity and repeated myself for another five, 10 or 20 years, the people now 'grieving' for 'Calvin and Hobbes' would be wishing me dead. — Bill Watterson

Calvin: Do you believe in the devil? You know, a supreme evil being dedicated to the temptation, corruption, and destruction of man? Hobbes: I'm not sure man needs the help. — Bill Watterson

Calvin: The more you know, the harder it is to take decisive action.
Once you are informed, you start seeing complexities and shades of gray.
You realize nothing is as clear as it first appears. Ultimately, knowledge is paralyzing.
Being a man of action, I cannot afford to take that risk.
Hobbes: You're ignorant, but at least you act on it. — Bill Watterson

I'd always enjoyed the comics more, and felt that as long as I was unemployed it would be a good chance to pursue that and see what response I could get from asyndicate, as I didn't have anything to lose at that point. So I drew up a comic strip - this was in 1980 - and sent it off and got rejected. I continued that for five years with different comic strip examples 'til finally Calvin and Hobbes came together. But it's been a long road. — Bill Watterson

It's a funny world, Hobbes."
"True."
"But it's not a hilarious world. ... unless you like sick humour."
"The world is probably funnier to people who don't live here. — Bill Watterson

Calvin : There's no problem so awful, that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse. — Bill Watterson

You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!! — Bill Watterson

It's hard to think of another body of work that is more universally beloved - I don't think I've ever met someone who has encountered 'Calvin and Hobbes' without falling for them. — Anthony Marra

Scientific Progress goes boink? — Bill Watterson

Virtual reality has nothing on Calvin. — Bill Watterson

Calvin:"It says here that 'religion is the opiate of the masses.' ... what do you suppose that means?"
Television: " ... it means that Karl Marx hadn't seen anything yet — Bill Watterson

Calvin and Hobbes are the only two characters from my childhood reading that I return to with any regularity, and they have grown with me, yielding newer and deeper meaning. — Anthony Marra

Barney's Dad was really bad so Barney hatched a plan
when his dad said "Eat your peas."
Barney shouted no and ran
Barney tricked his mean old dad and locked him in the cellar
Barney's Mom never found out where he'd gone,
Cause Barney didn't tell her.
There his dad spent his life eating mice and gruel
With every bite for fifty years
he was sorry he'd been cruel — Bill Watterson

I hate Calvin and Hobbes. I think its a big re-hash of formula kid strips. — Bill Griffith

I never felt ostracized or made to feel strange by obsessing over 'The Onion' or 'Calvin and Hobbes.' That was considered completely normal. — Simon Rich

I'm leaking brain lubricant. — Bill Watterson

I've been thinking Hobbes"
"On a weekend?"
"Well, it wasn't on purpose — Bill Watterson

It's only work if somebody makes you do it. — Bill Watterson

CALVIN:
This whole Santa Claus thing just doesn't make sense. Why all the secrecy? Why all the mystery?
If the guy exists why doesn't he ever show himself and prove it?
And if he doesn't exist what's the meaning of all this?
HOBBES:
I dunno. Isn't this a religious holiday?
CALVIN:
Yeah, but actually, I've got the same questions about God. — Bill Watterson

Until you stalk and overrun, you cannot devour anyone.
-Hobbes — Bill Watterson

Today for show & tell, I've brought in some flash cards I made. Each card has a letter followed by several dashes. When I show the card, you yell out the vulgar, obscene or blasphemous word they stand for! ... Ready? ... She's such a hypocrite about building vocabulary. — Bill Watterson

Oh lovely snowball, packed with care, smack a head that's unaware! Then with freezing ice to spare, melt and soak through underwear! Fly straight and true, hit hard and square! This, oh snowball, is my prayer. I only throw consecrated snowballs. — Bill Watterson

[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble.]
Calvin: Ha! I've got a great word and it's on a "Double word score" box!
Hobbes: "ZQFMGB" isn't a word! It doesn't even have a vowel!
Calvin: It is so a word! It's a worm found in New Guinea! Everyone knows that!
Hobbes: I'm looking it up.
Calvin: You do, and I'll look up that 12-letter word you played with all the Xs and Js!
Hobbes: What's your score for ZQFMGB?
Calvin: 957. — Bill Watterson

Calvin: Look, a dead bird!
Hobbes: It must've hit a window.
Calvin: Isn't it beautiful? It's so delicate. Sighhh ... once it's too late, you appreciate what a miracle life is. You realize that nature is ruthless and our existence is very fragile, temporary, and precious. But to go on with your daily affairs, you can't really think about that ... which is probably why everyone takes the world for granted and why we act so thoughtlessly. It's very confusing. I suppose it will all make sense when we grow up.
Hobbes: No doubt. — Bill Watterson

I hope some historian will confirm that I was the first cartoonist to use the word 'booger' in a newspaper comic strip. — Bill Watterson

You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants don't help. — Bill Watterson

Calvin: Life's a lot more fun when you aren't responsible for your actions. — Bill Watterson

How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food and beer conglomerates. Who'd have ever guessed product consumption, popular entertainment and spirituality would mix so harmoniously. It's a beautiful world, all right. — Bill Watterson

My book is called, Shut Up And Stop Whining: How To Do Something With Your Life Besides Think About Yourself. — Bill Watterson

I'm a misunderstood genius."
"What's misunderstood?"
"Nobody thinks I'm a genius. — Bill Watterson

It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept. — Bill Watterson