Best Mullet Quotes & Sayings

On this Twitter thing, at least five people a day say 'bring back the mullet.' My wife told me I'm not allowed. Troy Tulowitzki wants me to grow a rat-tail for his charity. I was like, 'What the heck is a rat-tail?' — John Kruk

In the past, the thought of being in my present situation had been a comfort, but now I did not even have this to look forward to, and so I lay down on my bed and dreamt I was eating a bowl of pink mullet and green figs cooked in coconut milk, and it had been cooked by my grandmother, which was why the taste of it pleased me so, for she was the person I liked best in all the world and those were the things I like best to eat also. — Jamaica Kincaid

Country music in the mid-'90s was a big influence on my career, and I played all the songs that are referenced in '94' back in my club days. Joe Diffie was rocking a sick mullet, and he was hotter than ever ... just putting out monster hit after monster hit. It totally takes me back to those days, and it makes me smile every time I hear it. — Jason Aldean

Today I asked Chloe to be my girlfriend,and she agreed. I sank my teeth into her neck and drank from her jugular in the library at lunchtime. She's agreed to join me as a vampire and she's moving in next week.
April Fool! — Tim Collins

Most people, when they imagine New England, think about old colonial homes, white houses with black shutters, whales, and sexually morbid WASPs with sensible vehicles and polite political opinions. This is incorrect. If you want to get New England right, just imagine a giant mullet in paint-stained pants and a Red Sox hat being pushed into the back of a cruiser after a bar fight. — Matt Taibbi

Now, of course, having failed in every attempt to subdue the Glades by frontal attack, we are slowly killing it off by tapping the River of Grass. In the questionable name of progress, the state in its vast wisdom lets every two-bit developer divert the flow into drag-lined canals that give him 'waterfront' lots to sell. As far north as Corkscrew Swamp, virgin stands of ancient bald cypress are dying. All the area north of Copeland had been logged out, and will never come back. As the glades dry, the big fires come with increasing frequency. The ecology is changing with egret colonies dwindling, mullet getting scarce, mangrove dying of new diseases born of dryness. — John D. MacDonald

I used to have quite long hair, and I decided that I wanted to get it cut. I'd never met the person who did it, and she cut it into some kind of dreadful mullet. It looked like a triangle on my head. The other kids were merciless. — Jonathan Stroud

There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millett's — Half Man Half Biscuit

What you look like on the outside is not what makes you cool at all. I mean, I had a mullet and wore parachute pants for a long, long time, and I'm doin' okay. — Ellen DeGeneres

Seed biscuits and milk! I hated Mrs. Mullet's seed biscuits the way Saint Paul hated sin. Perhaps even more so. I wanted to clamber up onto the table, and with a sausage on the end of a fork as my scepter, shout in my best Laurence Olivier voice, 'Will no one rid us of this turbulent pastry cook? — Alan Bradley

I was 23 with a mullet doing lots of jerk-off material.I can't look at the old tapes now. — Doug Stanhope

I'll ring for Mrs. Mullet, Feely said, reaching for a velvet pull that hung near the mantelpiece, and which probably hadn't been used since George the Third was foaming at the mouth. — Alan Bradley

She was foolish to think his attention rested on her. Who, knew, maybe he loved a good mullet and liked playing the back nine. It would be a damn shame, though. All the drool- worthy sensuality claimed by his own sex wouldn't be fair. — Eden Summers

I'm the man that brought you the mullet. — Bono

Because you were wearing a badge, customers assumed you were an oracle.
'What aisle is the desiccated coconut'
'How long do you cook a butternut squash?'
'What would you have with a pan fried red mullet?'
'Where can I find the holy grail?' Enough already! Some people obviously misread the 'Here to help' as 'Hello I'm your bitch! — Alan Carr

I've had every haircut you could possibly imagine: mullet, tail, dreadlocks, afro, crew cut. It's always been an expression of who I am. — Marc Forgione

For ages, I had this mullet until someone on the street stopped me and said, 'Darling, can I cut your hair for free? Because you look a bit weird.' — Natalia Tena

In 1985 I'd never seen a mullet before, had no idea what a mullet was, what it was called, or why someone might choose to endure such a thing except for the simple pleasure that comes from having two haircuts on one head. All I knew was that it looked monumentally stupid. — David Liss

I've always had the hair of Lionel Ritchie since I was a boy, but the mullet sadly is a hairpiece. My wife won't let me rock that hairstyle. — Danny McBride

My mullet was an insecurity shield. My mullet was an ethnic hatchet. My mullet was an arrow on fire.
My mullet said to the literary world, Hello, you privileged prep-school assholes, I'm here to steal your thunder, lightning, and book sales. — Sherman Alexie

I loved these salt rivers more than I loved the sea; I loved the movement of tides more than I loved the fury of surf. Something in me was congruent with this land, something affirmed when I witnessed the startled, piping rush of shrimp or the flash of starlight on the scales of mullet. I could feel myself relax and change whenever I returned to the lowcountry and saw the vast green expanses of marsh, feminine as lace, delicate as calligraphy. The lowcountry had its own special ache and sting. — Pat Conroy

Mrs. Mullet, when it came to gossip, was equaled only by the News of the World. — Alan Bradley

GET THAT CRAZY-ASS MULLET OFF YA SKULL — Wesley Willis

Dinners at Stony Cross Park were famously lavish, and this one was no exception. Eight courses of fish, game, poultry, and beef were served, accompanied by fresh flower arrangements that were brought to the table with each new remove. They began with turtle soup, broiled salmon with capers, perch and mullet in cream, and succulent Jon Dory fish dressed with a delicate shrimp sauce. The next course consisted of peppered venison, herb-garnished ham, gently fried sweetbreads floating in steaming gravy, and crisp-skinned roast fowl. And so on and so forth, until the guests were stuffed and lethargic, their faces flushed from the constant replenishing of their wineglasses by attentive footmen. The dinner was concluded with a succession of platters filled with almond cheesecakes, lemon puddings, and rice souffles. — Lisa Kleypas

It's like those high-school yearbook photos that everyone would rather not see: Oh my God, look at that mullet hair. I have those photos too, but for me, they're, like, entire movies. And they show them on cable. — John Cusack

Although I was amused at the mad scientist's idea of injecting a powerful bleach to render himself invisible, what truly shocked me was the way he treated his laboratory equipment. "It's just a fill-um, dear," Mrs. Mullet said, as I gripped her arm during the smashing of the glassware. — Alan Bradley

Fenchurch had red mullet and said it was delicious.
Arthur had a swordfish steak and said it made him angry. He grabbed a passing waitress by the arm and berated her.
"Why's this fish so bloody good?" he demanded, angrily. — Douglas Adams

I don't have a mullet, but going into season one on 'The Walking Dead,' I asked to have a mullet, and everybody talked me out of it. Because I'd have to wear a mullet when we were not shooting every day. I have that motorcycle, wings on my vest, the crossbow ... Maybe a mullet would've thrown me over the edge. — Norman Reedus

Some of my best friends are tattooed from head to toe. Some would never think of it. Some are rocking a mullet and a moustache and others are clean cut. It's funny that you don't need to speak the same language or look like someone to fit in. — Travis Pastrana

Hey, better than the real thing," I said. "What do you even do with a chimera?"
"What wouldn't you do with a chimera?" Jeff asked. "They're like the Swiss Army knife of animals."
"Party in the front, business in the back," Catcher agreed.
That earned a snort and laugh from me. "Any animal that can be compared to a mullet is a good animal in my book. — Chloe Neill

We went a few decades without a good mullet on TV, so I'm happy to bring it back. — Josh McDermitt

In Santa Barbara they stopped at a fish restaurant in what seemed to be a converted warehouse.
Fenchurch had red mullet and said it was delicious.
Arthur had a swordfish steak and said it made him angry. He grabbed a passing waitress by the arm and berated her.
"Why's this fish so bloody good?" he demanded, angrily.
"Please excuse my friend," said Fenchurch to the startled waitress. "I think he's having a nice day at last. — Douglas Adams

We refer to Lyft as a 'mullet app.' Simple up front, a lot going on in the back. — Logan Green

I wore a mullet to the Grammys! I have no fear. — Zendaya

Thankfully, I don't have a real mullet. — Josh McDermitt

Grade 9: I was too small for football, too shy for drama class, but I did have a passion for music. And so, with a mouth full of braces (and a glorious mullet), I accepted that the trombone would be a fantastic scholastic counterpart to my extracurricular loves: country music, and the guitar. — Jason McCoy