Val McDermid Quotes & Sayings

Nothing warms the cockles of the heart more than the smug self-satisfaction of being right. — Val McDermid

It's your fault because you got me into Morag Fraser. I'd never even heard of the Hebridean Harpies series till you dragged me along to her event. And now I am totally hooked. I was reading Vampires on Vatersay till one in the morning. I just had to finish it. And then I started Banshees of Berneray at breakfast and I could hardly drag myself away from it to come and meet you. — Val McDermid

A society gets the criminals it deserves. — Val McDermid

Why are you only coming home just after three? Do you want a drink? I'm wide awake now.'
He could be so like a small child, she thought. Out of nowhere, all eagerness and curiosity. — Val McDermid

It had seemed a good idea at the time to order the furniture for her new home online from a chain retailer. — Val McDermid

What do you think, boy? is he just another lying bastard, or what?' 'Prrrt,' the cat said on a rising intonation, his eyes closed to slits. 'I thought you'd say that. I agree, I know how to pick them, — Val McDermid

Without work, without direction, his thoughts were like a hamster on a wheel, circling and dancing with no destination and no possibility of arrival. With — Val McDermid

We weren't dirt poor, but there was no spare money kicking around. While it was very much understood that the way to a better life was through education, books were a luxury we couldn't afford. But when I was six, we actually moved opposite the central library, and that became my home from home. — Val McDermid

If only this mist would clear, it would be a lovely day," she said faintly.
"And if only the clouds would thicken up it would be a miserable day," Mr. Allen contributed from behind the paper. "It is what it is. — Val McDermid

I don't like fighting,' he said. 'It makes me hurt inside. Like I'm a kid again. In the cupboard, in the dark. If the grown-ups are fighting, it must be my fault. That's why I don't do rows.' He blinked hard, to keep the tears at bay. She was the only person in the world who could make him feel so exposed. It din't always feel like a good thing. 'Carol, I'm going home tomorrow. I can't manage without you. Not in any sense. So can we stop this no? I can't do it. — Val McDermid

Father, everybody has mugs these days. It's not a sign of debauchery and disrepute to drink tea from a mug. — Val McDermid

No two bodies will decompose in the same way, and at the same rate. You can have two bodies that are literally six feet apart and they will decompose in entirely different manners. It could be the amount of fat on the body. It could be the drugs they were taking, or the medication. It could be the type of clothing they're wearing. It could be that one has a particular odour that is more attractive to flies than the other. Absolutely anything. — Val McDermid

I know that. I do watch Spooks.' Carol was surprised. 'You do? I don't.' 'You should. They do. — Val McDermid

The contemporary crime novel is, at its best, a novel of character. That's where the suspense comes from. — Val McDermid

The Glasgow accent was so strong you could have built a bridge with it and known it would outlast the civilization that spawned it — Val McDermid

We make high demands on the people we expect to deliver justice, and we don't always appreciate how much it eats away at them. — Val McDermid

No woman is a heroine to her dentist. — Val McDermid

It forced me to realise that I'd been blaming you for not being flawless. And none of us is flawless.' Another sigh. 'I was so angry with myself for what happened to Michael and Lucy that I had to turn my anger somewhere else and you were the easiest target. — Val McDermid

She'd cook like an angel and fuck like a whore — Val McDermid

Around five-eight, slim, good shoulders, narrow hips, legs and trunk in proportion, short dark hair, side parting, dark eyes, probably blue, shadows under the eyes, fair skin, average nose, wide mouth, lower lip fuller than upper. — Val McDermid

Attractive smile, Carol added to her list of particulars as she shook the hand. — Val McDermid

You've always been handy with a knife, Mother — Val McDermid

Tell you what, just to prove I'm not, I'll let you top tonight. You'll be in charge. I'll be the one with handcuffs on.'
Carry on like this and you won't be wrong, Merrick thought to himself. — Val McDermid

Tony got up from his desk and crouched down beside her. She was instantly aware of the smell of him, a mixture of shampoo and his own fain, animal scent. — Val McDermid

Growing up in Fife, you were aware that there were these creatures called lesbians, but it was in the realms of complete freakishness. And I didn't feel like a freak. — Val McDermid

One of the reasons we all still read Jane Austen is because her books are about universal things which still matter today - love, money, family. They haven't gone out of fashion, so it's not throwing the baby out with the bathwater to rework her in a contemporary style. — Val McDermid

The condition of rage is one in which I find myself starting my day - once I see the news headlines. — Val McDermid

Time for the likeliest story since Mary told Joseph it was God's. — Val McDermid

He knew he could devastate her and drive her from him with a handful of well-chosen sentences. And part of him wanted to do just that. Part of him wanted to banish her and her presumptions from his life. He'd travel further and faster and lighter without her. Then an appalling thought battled through his anger. You sound just like Vanessa. — Val McDermid

I'd like to be more spontaneous. — Val McDermid

Not even a hand-stitched suit could hide a body gone ruinously to seed. I was tempted to offer some fashion advice, but I didn't think he'd welcome the news that this year, bellies are being worn inside the trousers — Val McDermid

When all else fails, go for the ego. — Val McDermid

The psychology of sanction.' 'If you're right, then why does anyone protest against torture? Why don't we all just go, "Oh well, we've seen how well it works in the movies, let's just go along with it"?' Carol leaned on her fists on the edge of his bed as she spoke, her tumbled blonde hair falling into her eyes. 'Carol, you might not have noticed, but there's a significant number of people out there who do say just that. Look at the opposition in the US when the Senate decided to outlaw torture just the other year. People believe in its efficacy precisely because they've seen it in the movies. And some of those believers are in positions of power. The reason we don't all fall for it is that we're not all equally credulous. Some of us are much more critical of what we see and read than others. But you can fool some of the people all of the time. And when spooks and cops go bad, that's what they rely on.' She — Val McDermid

If I didn't like her so much, I'd hate her. — Val McDermid

Look at you. Finally, you look upset. Is that what's bothering you now?' She stepped close to him and pushed him hard in the chest, making him stumble backwards. 'The fact that you didn't predict this? Didn't work it out? That you're not as smart as you thought you were? the great Tony Hill fucked up and now my brother's dead?' She pushed him again and he had to twist away to avoid falling down the stairs. — Val McDermid

I won't be attempting to write Jane Austen-style prose - that would be suicidal. But I will attempt to bring the highest level of my own prose, and to make it sparkle. — Val McDermid

Back in the day, when I started, you were still allowed to make mistakes. You got to make your mistakes in public, in a way. I think the world was a more forgiving place when I started my career, in the sense that we got time and space to develop as a writer. — Val McDermid

No. It's no the same. The interviewers want you to say what they want to hear. I want to hear what you have to say. — Val McDermid

Within the infant rind of this weak flower Poison hath residence and medicine power' Romeo and Juliet, II, iii — Val McDermid

As Richard has pointed out on several occasions, I subscribe to the irregular verb theory of life: I am a trained investigator, you have a healthy curiosity, she/he is a nosy parker. — Val McDermid

On one hand, you've got 'decent' men, and on the other you've got neanderthal misogynist bawbags - and the middle ground is what's disappearing. — Val McDermid

Why do the police need to know where I am? In the hands of a benevolent government, they could be looking after your interests, but what if the next government isn't so benevolent? — Val McDermid

The bodies of two murdered women have been found this week. For the record, I didn't kill either of them. — Val McDermid

I was always writing the books that I wanted to write, books that demanded to be written at the time. But, like most writers, you start off feeling your way. — Val McDermid

The discipline is based on one grisly fact: a corpse makes a good lunch. — Val McDermid

Patsy McDonald had the artificial brightness and dead eyes that go hand in hand with prescription antidepressants. They — Val McDermid

The hardest thing about being a grown up is realizing there are no magic formulas to release the ones we love from pain. Maybe that's why I enjoy computer games so much; you get to be God. — Val McDermid

I told her you were probably here'. 'Thanks,' Tony said. 'Did I mention she thinks her brother's murder is my fault? — Val McDermid

Honestly, Mum, how can you say someone's a great writer if you've got a stack of reference books next to you? It's just showing off. If I behaved like that in front of other people, you'd totally tell me off when we got home. So.why is it alright for T. S. Eliot to swagger about like a complete know it all and make the rest of us feel stupid? — Val McDermid

I said to Ruth Rendell, 'When you've written as many books as you have, it's easier.' She said, 'No dear, it gets harder'. — Val McDermid

It was a source of constant disappointment to Catherine Morland that her life did not more closely resemble her books. Or rather, that the books in which she found its likeness were so unexciting. — Val McDermid

Steve Mosby has become one of a handful of writers who make me excited about crime fiction. — Val McDermid

I am the despair of my accountant; I am the plastic bags of receipts. — Val McDermid

Sometimes fear is used as a way to control. — Val McDermid

Walking by water frees your creativity. I don't know how it works - there's something about it that's liberating. — Val McDermid

I failed her. And she's out of my life. I don't even know where she's living. What she's doing to get through the days. And I miss her. Every single day, I miss her. — Val McDermid

I did want to be Joni Mitchell for quite a long time. — Val McDermid

You know it's a bad case when the only way you can catch up on your sleep is to get unconscious. — Val McDermid

He spread his hands in a self-deprecating gesture. 'Well, I'm not a cop. And I'm not a woman.' She couldn't resist. 'I had noticed. — Val McDermid

Junction at the top of the stairs. She gave a curious glance down General Tilney's corridor, but she — Val McDermid

We all make mistakes, Carol. Sometimes they're more expensive than others. But I don't deserve to lose you,' he said, spreading his hands in appeal. — Val McDermid

I spent a lot of time at my grandparents in the school holidays, and the only books in the house were a copy of the Bible and Agatha Christie's 'Murder at the Vicarage.' I developed a taste for murder mysteries and then later discovered libraries, second-hand bookshops, and jumble sales. — Val McDermid

We all present versions of ourselves. The person you are at work is not the same person you are at home. The face we present in our most intimate relationships is not the face we present to the world. — Val McDermid

I was just finishing up my drink then I was off to get the night bus.' Carol grinned. 'Your sophistication never ceases to amaze me. What's wrong with a taxi?' 'You get a better class of nutter on the night bus. I blend in perfectly — Val McDermid

It was a bit unimaginable when I began that I'd ever get to 25 books. But it was also unimaginable how much crime-writing would have changed. — Val McDermid

It seems to me that one of the things that happened with a lot of literary fiction in the 1980s and 1990s was that it became very concerned with the academy and less with how people live their lives. We got to a point where the crime novel stepped into the breach. It was also a time when the crime novel stopped being so metropolitan. — Val McDermid

Proportion than she — Val McDermid

You take the lead. He'll open up more easily to a copper than a mumbo jumbo man — Val McDermid

There is still a funny notion that women should not write violent fiction. — Val McDermid

I think Jane Austen builds suspense well in a couple of places, but she squanders it, and she gets to the endgame too quickly. So I will be working on those things. — Val McDermid

The nurse looked surprised. 'You're a bit high on the totem pole to be taking statements.' Carol debated momentarily how to describe her relationship with Tony. 'Colleague' was insufficient, 'landlord' somehow misleading and 'friend' both more and less than the truth. She shrugged. 'He feeds my cat. — Val McDermid

Everybody's got the right to go to hell in the handcart of their choice. — Val McDermid

He looked so vulnerable and fallible, his shoulders slumped, his head down, that Carol's impulses overrode the decision she'd taken only minutes before to play it cool. She stepped forward and pulled Tony into a tight hug. 'If anyone can do it, you can,' she whispered against his chin like a cat marking its territory. — Val McDermid

I don't think of myself as Scottish or lesbian when I sit down and write. I am glad I have broken out of that limited audience. — Val McDermid

I came from a working-class family, but I was supported by a grant system and had my fees paid, so I came out of Oxford with a debt of something like £200. — Val McDermid

It's not magic that takes us to another world - it's storytelling. — Val McDermid

Sometimes, the only things that make you feel good are the same ones that worked when you were five. Yes, I slammed the door — Val McDermid

If you don't make the best-seller list, if you don't get shortlisted for any prizes, it's goodbye. — Val McDermid

You know, I've often wondered. It's pretty clear what they were up to in Sodom, but what do you suppose the sin of Gomorrah was?' Carol asked. — Val McDermid

I've never wanted to live in a ghetto or write in a ghetto. I want to write about a world that reflects the one most people live in. Gay people are just one aspect of that. — Val McDermid

I'm not into little boys till they're old enough to have their own credit card. — Val McDermid

Admittedly, they [(places in novels)] didn't all have such ridiculous names as the ones in the Piddle Valley where her father's group of parishes was centered. It would have been hard to make credible a romantic fiction set in Farleigh Piddle, Middle Piddle, Nether Piddle and Piddle Dummer. — Val McDermid

I was thinking things had changed: that the next generation of men weren't as institutionally misogynist as the previous were. And then, suddenly, the Internet came along and gave them a platform to voice their feelings anonymously. And boy, did the bile come out. — Val McDermid

The thing is that quite a few of my books have ended up as they are because of conversations I've had over the years with forensic scientists. — Val McDermid

It's a piece of cake, being a lawyer or a doctor or a computer systems analyst or an accountant. Libraries are full of books telling you how to do it. The only textbooks for private eyes are on fiction shelves, and I don't remember ever reading one that told me how to interrogate an eight-year old without feeling like I was auditioning for the Gestapo. — Val McDermid

A lot of reality TV is repellent, but that doesn't diminish the qualities of some of the people who take part. There are decent people in there who have no alternatives. — Val McDermid

I don't think many of us launched ourselves into the world of writing books fully formed. — Val McDermid

She watched his pale, square hands on the map, the short almost stubby fingers, with their neatly trimmed nails and a sparse scattering of fine black hairs on the bottom section of each finger. Appalled, she felt a stirring of desire. You're pathetic as an adolescent, she savagely chided herself. Like a teenager who fancies the first teacher who says anything nice about your work. Grow up, Jordan! — Val McDermid

Everybody seemed to like Skype except him, Tony thought, closing his office door then settling in front of his screen. His dislike was both personal and professional. Everybody looked weird on Skype. Everyone, frankly, looked like a potential patient. There was something very unsettling about that fish-eyed stare. Even people he liked looked deranged. From a professional perspective, the trouble was you could never see enough of the person you were in conversation with to gauge their body language. They might be giving off all sort of signals you'd be aware of in what his boss had taken to calling "F2F encounters," but the Skype interface could hide a multitude of clues. — Val McDermid

If you want to last more than five minutes as a private investigator, you've got to have the instincts of a chameleon. Gumshoes that stand out in the crowd are as much use to the client as a chocolate chip pan. — Val McDermid

It was a lot easier to be optimistic about equality when you didn't have to confront the Neanderthals on a daily basis. When you could imagine that people were actually changing their minds because they'd stopped groping secretaries at the photocopier. — Val McDermid

You are Tadeusz Radecki? I am in the right place?' 'I know who I am. What I want to know is who you are. — Val McDermid

You can't prove a negative. I can't prove there are no such thing as vampires any more than you can prove you're not a lesbian. — Val McDermid

I'm telling you the truth, Carol. Even though it's actually none of your business.'
She half turned, found a smile from somewhere and said, 'You're quite right. It is none of my business. Till tomorrow Tony. — Val McDermid

I have a vernacular house on the seaside in Northumberland and an Edwardian semi in south Manchester. They're both exactly as big as they need to be. I can't be doing with an ostentatious, big house - you can only be in one room at a time. — Val McDermid

He frowned as he struggled to remember. It was like watching an elephant crochet. — Val McDermid

That was the trouble with moving houses; no matter how carefully you packed the books, they never ended up on the new shelves in quite the right place. — Val McDermid

It's only hunting you that keeps me from being you. — Val McDermid

I think that crime is a good vehicle for looking at society in general because the nature of the crime novel means that you draw on a wide group of social possibilities. — Val McDermid

They both possessed a victimhood that had been conferred because they'd both been guilty of being female in a world where some men believed they deserved never to feel powerless. — Val McDermid