Shefali Tsabary Quotes & Sayings

I think the main benefit is that much of the traditional parenting that's being carried out today is so fear based and while the parent thinks they're in control they're really being ruled by fear. Everything is connected to fear. — Shefali Tsabary

If you want to enter into a state of pure connection with your child, you can achieve this by setting aside any sense of superiority. — Shefali Tsabary

Freedom to really prioritize and really zone into what really matters which is the parent-child connection. — Shefali Tsabary

[I'm a conscious parent when I believe] a parent's presence in their child's life is of paramount value and provides the foundation for their sense of worth. — Shefali Tsabary

The child is free to live out their own destiny. — Shefali Tsabary

Now when you transfer into the conscious parenting paradigm, you have to release those pressures and those fears ... you actually think into the very ordinary but profound moment to moment connection to your children and you do away with those extraneous attachments to achievement or beauty or wealth or success. And while those things have their place, they don't overwhelm or override the life of the parent and child. Your life is actually suddenly liberated. — Shefali Tsabary

[I'm a conscious parent] when I stay away from fear-based control tactics - punishment, yelling and threats and I'm seeking more enlightened ways to create boundries with my child. — Shefali Tsabary

We can teach children about natural consequences and cause and effect of their relationships which is really a mirror of what happens in nature. — Shefali Tsabary

The traditional paradigm of parenting has been very hierarchical, the parent knows best and very top down. Conscious parenting topples [this paradigm] on its head and creates this mutuality, this circularity where both parent and child serve each other and where in fact, perhaps, the child could be even more of a guru for the parent ... teaching the parent how the parent needs to grow, teaching the parent how to enter the present moment like only children know how to do. — Shefali Tsabary

A conscious parent is not one who seeks to fix her child or seek to produce or create the 'perfect' child. This is not about perfection. The conscious parent understands that is journey has been undertaken, this child has been called forth to 'raise the parent' itself. To show the parent where the parent has yet to grow. This is why we call our children into our lives. — Shefali Tsabary

Life doesn't happen to us, but happens with us. — Shefali Tsabary

There is no universal template that can be applied to everybody. So everyone kind of enter the process in their own way, on their own time. — Shefali Tsabary

Children are way more articulate, way more connected to their rights, and they want to be fully participating, empowered members of society but we have to release and we have to let go. We have to allow children to enter their self-governance and their state of empowered presence. — Shefali Tsabary

The principal task is to put spiritual foundations under both our child's life and our own. This triggers a shift in the elemental way in which we relate to our children, with the result that their behavior automatically falls in line as they become aware of, and true to, who they really are. Behavioral changes are an outgrowth of a shift in the relationship. — Shefali Tsabary

Life is to be experienced, not fought against, run from, or engaged halfheartedly. Though we may wish to make changes in the future, to be conscious is to be with an experience as it's unfolding, rather than thinking about how we would like to change it. Taking charge of our life so that we alter the quality of our experiences in the future comes after an experience. — Shefali Tsabary

The more you focus on connection the more free you are on one hand and the more free you can be because the child does feel authentically connected to their destiny. — Shefali Tsabary

Conscious parenting is a new paradign shift in the way we look at our roles as parents. It's turning the spot light away from fixing the child and managing the child, obsession with all things that have to do with the child and the child centric approach and really focusing on the evolution of the parent. It about fully understanding that unless the parent has raised themselves to a certain level of emotional integration and maturity, they will really not be able to do true service to the child's spirit. — Shefali Tsabary

Parents who engage in this kind of [conscious] parenting understand the power of being present being mindful to take the time to build connection understanding that this foundation is the bedrock of all later self-worth, self-esteem and self-actualization. — Shefali Tsabary

I think we're seeing that the way we've done parenting cannot be sustainable in this generation, for sure. — Shefali Tsabary

As a parent, I repeatedly find myself presented with opportunities to respond to my daughter as if she were a real person like myself, with the full range of feelings I experience - the same longing, hope, excitement, imagination, ingenuity, sense of wonder, and capacity for delight. Yet like many parents, I tend to become so caught up in my own agenda that I often miss the opportunity afforded by these moments. I find myself so conditioned to sermonize, so oriented to teaching, that I am often insensitive to the wondrous ways in which my child reveals her uniqueness, showing us she's a being unlike any other who has ever walked this planet. When — Shefali Tsabary

The Children's Justice Campaign reminds us of our sacred obligation as adults to raise ourselves into consciousness so that our children may thrive. — Shefali Tsabary

When you parent, it's crucial you realize you aren't raising a mini-me, but a spirit throbbing with its own signature. For this reason, it's important to separate who you are from who each of your children is. Children aren't ours to possess or own in any way. When we know this in the depths of our soul, we tailor our raising of them to their needs, rather than molding them to fit our needs. — Shefali Tsabary

When we prioritize and focus and that becomes the anchor the relationship becomes the anchor and it trumphs everything else than it's at once freeing and anxiety relieving because the connection itself feeds empowerment and self-worth and self-esteem so it takes away the anxiety of raising a child. — Shefali Tsabary

The pressure we put on ourselves to produce this perfect operatic version of ourselves really puts an inordinate amount of stress and tension on us. — Shefali Tsabary