Famous Quotes & Sayings

Samantha Irby Quotes & Sayings

Enjoy the top 6 famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Samantha Irby.

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Famous Quotes By Samantha Irby

Samantha Irby Quotes 233049

Maybe in life you get all kinds of soulmates. Multiple people who vibrate at the same level you do. I think that's what Fred is for me. I just don't get to see his penis anymore. So, no, I don't get my happy-ending tongue kiss in the rain, but I did get my friend back. And I don't have to worry about running these busted knees around after any babies. — Samantha Irby

Samantha Irby Quotes 1116286

You know what makes me happy? Unexpected phone calls in the middle of the day. Remembering what I liked at that one restaurant we went to that one time. Half-dead grocery store flowers just because they were on sale. A good morning text that says, "have a good day and try not to burn anything to the ground in a furious rage. — Samantha Irby

Samantha Irby Quotes 1364931

But no, I came by these feelings honestly. And I don't accept bitter. Wounded, yes. Traumatized, sure. Grieving, okay. Anything other than bitter. I put too much work in to be callously tossed aside as bitter. Bitter is for someone who hasn't earned it. — Samantha Irby

Samantha Irby Quotes 1606062

No one ever tells attractive children how much they suck, and then the rest of us get stuck with insufferable, narcissistic adults who can barely tie their shoes because someone else is busy either doing it for them or congratulating them on their effort. I — Samantha Irby

Samantha Irby Quotes 1741286

But I was 22 when I started this job, and you know what? Sometimes it really is okay to just have a fucking job. Not a passion, not a career, but a steadfast source of bi-weekly income deposited directly into a checking account from which food, and medicine, and apps one totally forgot about having downloaded will be paid for. — Samantha Irby

Samantha Irby Quotes 1825211

I want to ride a camel to the club and valet that shit. — Samantha Irby