Rudy Simone Quotes & Sayings

No matter how much your AS male loves you, there will be numerous times and ways that he cannot connect with you. — Rudy Simone

If you are the partner of a man with Asperger's you may be the one who first noticed his anomalies; he may or may not be officially diagnosed. You might be perpetually frustrated at your inability to connect with him on a deep and consistent level. One day you feel as if your relationship is finally on solid ground, and the next day that ground has dropped out from under you. — Rudy Simone

I don't think that I look, act and feel younger than I am, I know I do. I'm not irresponsible, just hyper and active like a younger person is. I have a lot of younger friends. I don't have any problems in particular with people my own age, save that I sometimes think they are boring. — Rudy Simone

While bullying happens to both males and females on the spectrum, girls, particularly, can be judgmental. Dr. Grandin advocates that some gifted children with autism should be allowed to skip high school and go right to college and I couldn't agree with her more. We flourish much better in an environment where the emphasis is on academic achievement and not socializing. Of course we need to learn to socialize, but through shared interests with like-minded individuals, not by being thrown to the lions. Emotionally, we require an atmosphere of tolerance and non-judgment. — Rudy Simone

Deborah Tedone, Director of Square Pegs/Asperger's Support Group for Adults in Rochester, NY. Deborah says so eloquently what all parents of AS girls need to hear. — Rudy Simone

Having to be somewhere at a specific time and performing according to others' expectations can put pressure on them and create a paralysis of will. Because many people with AS are highly intelligent, they may have a hard time with teachers that are not up to par in their eyes, and bosses that don't run things as well as they could. If they don't quit because of any of the above, the know-it-all nature of an intelligent Aspie has been known to upset a few bosses here and there, causing termination of employment. As a result, many have gone through a series of jobs and have had unsatisfactory experiences which get more discouraging as the years pass. — Rudy Simone

Even if we can handle it academically or intellectually, it doesn't mean we can handle it physically or emotionally. We need extra time, extra patience, and more sensitivity than most people. Full stop. — Rudy Simone

I was also accused of lying throughout my childhood, though I was more truthful than either of my siblings. I have been accused of manipulation where it was not intended, too. (Shannon) — Rudy Simone

Why do we read with greed? (Or play, or design, etc.?) We want to fill our minds with knowledge the way others want to fill their bellies with food. Information replaces confusion, which many of us experience in interactions with others. It is a place to focus, apart from all the external stimuli in our homes, schools, shops, etc. It is completely within our control how much we want to let in, unlike dealing with people, who are unpredictable and uncontrollable. (Even those of us who are in our own bubble, who don't read or seem to look outward much, may have a rich internal world and not yet have such a need to connect.) — Rudy Simone

When you do meet someone you like and who likes you, early disclosure may be the way to go. When I started dating my partner he knew from my work that I had Asperger's. — Rudy Simone

If a guy can't handle it when you talk about quantum physics, Manga, or Dungeons and Dragons, then he probably isn't the guy for you. If he gets embarrassed by your bluntness, you're probably not a good match. If he doesn't get your jokes, references, etc., then do you really want to pursue it? We tend to feel flawed and want to change ourselves to be accepted. We are good mimics and we think that we can mimic being the kind of girl that guys will like. By all means work on yourself, but most important, be yourself. — Rudy Simone

Some Aspergirls are happy alone and start to wonder if there's something wrong with them when society puts pressure on and asks "Aren't you lonely?" It's nobody's business what you do, and if you are happy being alone, you are not flawed, you are lucky. — Rudy Simone

Wear a hat with a brim to counter the effects of overhead lights. It can also give you a feeling of security. — Rudy Simone

The idea of living with someone scares me senseless. I've done it before for five years, and I shut down to cope with it. I don't want to give up myself again. I hope to find someone who is happy just to continue "as is" without expectations. (Kes) — Rudy Simone

Not comprehending things the way other people do is fine in academia because we can usually find our own methods, but in social situations, this same tendency plays out differently - we can't always impose our own rules and priorities on others. We can't research people in everyday conversation the way we research information from books. It is not uncommon for us, when we're young, to ask too many questions of others, which makes them uncomfortable. If we could set the tone, we would probably be more comfortable, but we can't so we shut down. — Rudy Simone