Ray Palla Quotes & Sayings

Time was unending when charmed, captivated, even delighted by the mystical motion of the ocean! — Ray Palla

If you run, you better be faster than my gun. -Weasel to illegal aliens — Ray Palla

Buzz Aldrin said something on the moon about a soft landing before 'stage-aware' Neil Armstrong said, "Houston, the Eagle has landed". People still argue about what the first words were on the moon. — Ray Palla

Seasickness in itself is not contagious, but I'm pretty sure that puking is extremely contagious. — Ray Palla

I guess it's a good thing that we don't know what we don't know; otherwise it would probably make a lot more of us a lot more insane. — Ray Palla

You, sir, are as twisted as a twelve-string banjo. - Willie Nelson to Sheriff Preston Bank — Ray Palla

Please sir, eat the nuts that are here for you. - Melamie Masters — Ray Palla

If you're not changing, evolving with the times, there's a pretty good chance that you're stagnant, dying, already dead, or just a rock in someone's shoe. — Ray Palla

My name is Richard Werner. Dick. You can call me Dick. — Ray Palla

Just knock off the horns and hair, and toss it on the coals for about thirty seconds on each side. I like mine still kicking and quivering! -Wichita talking about steak — Ray Palla

I swear if Washington moved any slower, we could be at war and it would all be over before they could even lift their sluggish, naked, dead asses off of their comfortable heated-seat toilets. -Fitzhugh to Captain Jeeter — Ray Palla

You can't shave a cat with a shoe. — Ray Palla

Happy Valentine's... Let's wear costumes! — Ray Palla

Eyebrows and hair singed off, Hector is barely recognizable under a lathering of day-glow orange. He appears to have been tarred-and-feathered with orange tar and oatmeal feathers. — Ray Palla

Never fry bacon naked. — Ray Palla

A little holiday spirit lives forever in everyone. Test your own holiday spirit. Give away all of it you can. You'll see, it comes right back to you. — Ray Palla

The word for the day is: legs - the phrase for the day is: Spread the word. - Major Mac Pecan — Ray Palla

Just a nod, or a wink, a finger, or a thumb can have so many different meanings. — Ray Palla

An elementary school student asked me the NOT "politically correct" question, "Is an idiot smarter than a moron?" I had to Google it because I was afraid to respond in today's PC society and didn't want to offend him, his parents, or anyone else. Here's what I found.

Technically, a moron is smarter than an idiot. An imbecile is also smarter than an idiot.

Although today the words are considered insulting and derogatory, prior to the 1960s they were widely used as actual psychology terms associated with intelligence on an IQ test.

An IQ between:
00-25 = Idiot
26-50 = Imbecile
51-70 = Moron

Explaining all of this to a nine year old with an IQ of 130 made me feel like society has turned all adults into one of the above, myself included.

When I told him that I'm afraid to openly say it, the nine year old said, "Adults are idiots! — Ray Palla

We enjoy talking about music, politics, and subjugation. - Kinky Friedman to Night Rider on KOKE-FM — Ray Palla

Why go to so much trouble when Cranberry Juice, Chicken Broth, and Vodka tastes just like Thanksgiving Dinner, and you can enjoy it alone. — Ray Palla

Nudist Colony Halloween parties are especially scary. They give the word "moon" a new cruel meaning. — Ray Palla

...people shouldn't die for things they believe. There needs to be a better reason. Belief is so shallow. — Ray Palla

My hands are way too big to text. I'd need short hand for my hands. -Foot to Pad — Ray Palla

Give little people a little power, and it goes straight to their ugly, little heads. -Foot talks about authority — Ray Palla

Put two idiot drivers together at a traffic light and you're gonna have a car wreck. - Pop - Krill America — Ray Palla

Regaring Politics: You've got your cats on one side and your dogs on the other; someone has to walk the fence and feed the animals. - Kinky Friedman — Ray Palla