Peter Sellers Quotes & Sayings

I writhe when I see myself on the screen. I'm such a dreadfully clumsy hulking image. I say to myself, 'Why doesn't he get off? Why doesn't he get off?' I mean, I look like such an idiot. Some fat awkward thing dredged up from some third-rate drama company. I must stop thinking about it, otherwise I shan't be able to go on working. — Peter Sellers

Criticism should be done by critics, and a critic should have some training and some love of the medium he is discussing. But these days, gossip-columnist training seems to be enough qualification. I suppose an ability to stand on your feet through interminable cocktail parties and swig interminable gins in between devouring masses of fried prawns may just possibly help you to understand and appreciate what a director is getting at, but for the life of me I can't see how. — Peter Sellers

It won't be easy, that is why I have always failed where others have succeeded. — Peter Sellers

Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room. — Peter Sellers

Facts - behind them lies the whole fabric of deductive truth. — Peter Sellers

Ecstatic over the total annihilation of the Earth, Dr. Strangelove "resurrects" himself, miraculously regaining his ability to walk. His mechanical, robot-like body rises out of his wheelchair, crying exultantly: "Sir! I have a plan. Heh." (He realizes he is standing up.) "Mein Fuehrer, I can walk!" — Peter Sellers

If you ask me to play myself, I will not know what to do. I do not know who or what I am. — Peter Sellers

Women are more difficult to handle than men. It's their minds. — Peter Sellers

Relax, I'll get it. (said to Kato after Clouseau knocks him unconscious) — Peter Sellers

I am here to fix the problem with yer pheaun. — Peter Sellers

Conversation like television set on honeymoon ... unnecessary. — Peter Sellers

There is no me. I do not exist. There used to be a me but I had it surgically removed. — Peter Sellers

Is there anybody hiding there in the dark? — Peter Sellers

I'm a classic example of all humorists - only funny when I'm working. — Peter Sellers

To label any subject unsuitable for comedy is to admit defeat. — Peter Sellers

When you have been killed as many times as I have, you get used to it. — Peter Sellers

Clouseau: Does yer dewg bite? Inn Keeper: No Clouseau: Nice Doggy (bends down to pet a dachshund - it snarls and bites him) I thought you said yer dewg did not bite! Inn Keeper: Zat ... iz not my dog! — Peter Sellers

If I can't really find a way to live with myself, I can't expect anyone else to live with me. — Peter Sellers

I feel ghostly unreal until I become somebody else again on the screen. — Peter Sellers

Vocal music is an attempt to take the whole human being and project it into space. It is the ultimate gesture of getting out of yourself. You take a part of you that is most private, most personal, most inward and you hurl it out into space - you project it as far as you can. That gesture of opining this whole region of the body results in an enormous spiritual release, and is felt by other people with tremendous impact. — Peter Sellers

You have to live before you die, or you'll die before you live. — Peter Sellers

To see me as a person on screen would be one of the dullest experiences you could ever wish to experience. — Peter Sellers

You'll catch your death of cold. Clouseau: Yes, yes I probably will but ... its all part of life's rich pageantry, you kneau. — Peter Sellers

We don't want to start a nuclear war unless we really have to, now do we Jack? — Peter Sellers

There used to be a real me, but I had it surgically removed. — Peter Sellers

Finally, in conclusion, let me say just this. — Peter Sellers