Penny Reid Quotes & Sayings

measuring tools into a tall cabinet at the back of the large, industrial kitchen. I returned for the six-quart mixer, hoisting it in my arms and stumbling under its weight. The click of her heels grew closer and I knew I didn't have time to hide the machine like I wanted, so I lowered it to the ground and covered it with my apron, spinning around just as my momma appeared in the doorway. "Thank goodness." Her hands were — Penny Reid

A sinister giggle escaped my lips. I'm not much of a giggler unless I've done something sinister. — Penny Reid

It's ok to be gifted at using people if you're using them for good. — Penny Reid

He didn't save us ; haven't you been listening?" Elizabeth held an icepack to her chin where she'd been hit by an meaty elbow . "Fiona stabbed one of them with a Susan Bates needle, Marie was wielding a tequila bottle, Sandra pistol-whipped the other, and I shot the third."
"Where were Janie and Kat?" Ashley looked from me to Kat.
"Hiding behind the couch like sane people!" Kat said before anyone else could speak. — Penny Reid

Nancy Danvish is a farmer." "But she's still a lady. — Penny Reid

There is a stillness that accompanies the death of a loved one. Everything becomes quieter, but it's not just sound that is dimmed. Movement, action, perception, emotion - everything is distant and removed. Maybe — Penny Reid

Love you, Quinn Sullivan. You are precious to me, and I will love you always. And if I die before you, I plan to haunt you — Penny Reid

Right ... here's what we'll do: I'll get the kids. You take your shower. After homework and playtime, I'll challenge them to shots until they pass out. Then we'll eat the rest of their Halloween candy while binge-watching Game of Thrones. — Penny Reid

It is a universally acknowledged, inalienable truth that a knitter faced with the unadorned neck, head, and hands of a person she cares for feels an overwhelming compulsion to smother that person in fancy hand-knits. — Penny Reid

The apartment was a disaster.
A consummate disaster.
If mess-making were an Olympic sport, this mess would have won the bronze medal, maybe the silver. — Penny Reid

The carpet would be stained ... so what ? It happens. Shit happens.
And yet, why was it necessary for shit to happen all over the apartment I'd just cleaned? Why couldn't they have shit outside ? — Penny Reid

Over the last several days, I'd done a fair amount of practiced focusing on my present state of "lesness" - homelessness, joblessness and relationshiplessness. Less was not more. Less was an unstable, uncomfortable place to be. — Penny Reid

They were all watching me with open concern and curiosity; the only sound breaking the silence was Sandra munching on potato chips. "I'm — Penny Reid

I didn't, because the idea of apologizing felt inadequate. I wasn't sure that I was ready to be forgiven. So I kept quiet and swallowed my guilt. — Penny Reid

If they don't learn about launching rockets at home, then they'll just learn about it on the streets." I glowered at him. "That sounds like something Hitler would say. — Penny Reid

the reluctant curve of his smile, — Penny Reid

A brief silence followed, during which the reality of my present situation crashed over me.

I was alone. I was alone with Cletus Winston. I was alone with Cletus Winston and no one knew where I was.

Oh. Shit. — Penny Reid

I might cry later, at home, while watching Steel Magnolias and dressed like a homeless person. Sometimes I applied mascara before crying just to heighten the experience. — Penny Reid

You're Catholic, right? What do the Catholics say?"
Nico lifted an eyebrow and regarded Sandra with sparkly eyes. "I'm not the Lorax of Catholics. I don't speak for the trees of the faithful. That's why we have the Pope. — Penny Reid

He half said, half mumbled, "I'm not that nice. — Penny Reid

Who is your famous crush? If a super-hot Hollywood actor who also happened to be a great person wanted to take you home - and the lights stayed on during the deed - what would you do? I mean, not in theory. Honestly, what would you do?" Claire looked at me for a long moment then asked, "Would I get a heads up a few months ahead of time? So I could eat low carb and start working out?" "No." "Then, honestly, I'd run the other way. — Penny Reid

Oh . . ." I nodded faintly, my throat suddenly dry. I attempted a smile. — Penny Reid

Good girl. Test passed. I think I love you, Janie. Let's get married and not have children."
My eyes widened for a brief moment; I felt sure he was teasing me but, looking into his dancing grey eyes, I knew he meant it as a compliment. I returned his smile. I liked Steven.
Carlos broke the silence, "Ms. Morris, the job is yours if you'd like it."
"Oh, please say yes." Steven's smile widened.
"To the proposal or the job? — Penny Reid

I aspire to different achievements than worldly success, and I know you do as well. But, Claire, I'm glad you finally saw reason and accepted the record deal. Your star is too bright to hide in plain sight."

"You just rhymed, Cletus. I might have to steal that for a song."

"Go ahead. I ain't using it for anything profitable. — Penny Reid

Poor Quinn."
I glanced at my husband, and found him shaking his head mournfully.
"Why poor Quinn?" Kat asked.
"Dan still has his crush on Nico, and Quinn isn't here to defend his bromance."
I snorted because this was true. Dan had a bit of a crush on Nico. But then, we all did.
As though reading my thoughts, Sandra mock-whispered, "We all have a crush on Nico. Even you, Greg."
He didn't deny it; instead, opting to say, "I'm going to start a rumor that Dan and Nico bought tickets to the Cubs opening game, they're going together, and are hoping to get on the kiss-cam."
I clicked my tongue in mild disapproval. "You are a gossip, Greg Archer."
"Yes. I am. Annoyingly, Alex is worthless at spreading rumors because he's smitten with Drew."
"And you're smitten with no one," I stated.
"Untrue. I'm smitten with you."
This earned him an appreciative grin; I lifted my chin. "Well played, husband. Well played. — Penny Reid

If I ever cheated on my wife, I think she'd have my balls cut off. If you don't want to castrate this guy after what he's done, then he's not the one for you. — Penny Reid

aren't beautiful, they're pretty. Beautiful is too heavy a word to assign to a girl. Women are beautiful because their faces show that they know they have lost something... and gained something else. — Penny Reid

Cell phones, like the other social media constructs of our time, encourage the collecting of so-called friends and contacts similar to how my grandmother used to collect teacups and put them on display in her china cabinet. Only now, the teacups are people, and the china cabinet is Facebook. — Penny Reid

It means my brain finds you more interesting than all the really interesting trivial facts I could be contemplating or researching at present. — Penny Reid

Over the past forty days, I think I grieved for her every hour. In a way, I grieved for her before she died. And now that she was gone, I grieved for her still. Part of me wondered, however, if the grief would have been sharper, more debilitating, if I hadn't been given the month to say goodbye. — Penny Reid

Your jokes are terrible."
Greg grinned, walking me backwards into my suite and wagging his eyebrows he corrected me, "It's pronounced
tremendous. — Penny Reid

We were both adulting like adult adults who behaved like adults. — Penny Reid

When does something man-made cease being synthetic, and become real? — Penny Reid

Little did he know, I possessed no feminine wiles. Only the willies and the hibby jibbies. — Penny Reid

What?" I whispered, suspicious, still fighting my flare of hormones. Or, more precisely, whoremones. That's — Penny Reid

My previous outlook could be summed up as follows: Life is shit. Math makes sense. Fictional characters are superior to real people because real people are equal parts pitiful and predictable. — Penny Reid

Does he give you zings in your things? — Penny Reid

but applying logic to love is like buttering a pig before you slaughter it. — Penny Reid

We all belong to ourselves, until we have children. Then our children lease us for as long as they want. — Penny Reid

She was a superhero. She was my hero. Therefore, moments when she allowed herself to display vulnerability were distressing. It was like watching Superman struggle through a bout of kryptonite exposure. — Penny Reid

You underestimate how deeply you cut when your intentions carry no knives. — Penny Reid

We're taking it a hundred miles north.
That's a hundred miles closer to where you are.
I've decided units and measurements of distance are bullshit.
With you there are only two distances that matter:
Here.
Not here.
You are not here. — Penny Reid

Nico flinched and pain flickered within his green eyes. He struck the wall next to my head, causing me to jump. I don't want to be fair! I'm not interested in being nice! You're right. I'm playing games with you and I'm playing dirty because I want you, I need you, to be with you, to hear your voice, your laugh, to hold you, to touch you ... — Penny Reid

Think of how much better the world would be if people craved compliments about the beauty of their heart rather than the beauty of their face. The — Penny Reid

I think we're suited."
"So you've said." ...
"But like you said in the car, we don't know each other, not really."
"I get it," I said on a rush, because I did get it. I did.
And yet ...
But then he admitted quietly, "I want to know you ... And I want to be known. — Penny Reid

And you are more than the mistakes of your youth. You are more than the label you've been assigned by people who might love you, but don't really know who you are anymore. — Penny Reid

Apparently, hope is for hipsters because hope failed me. — Penny Reid

I'd been on the precipice of being brave, and nothing can make a person more foolish and vulnerable than bravery. — Penny Reid

Ashley,
I caught a bear today in the new trap. We're taking it a hundred miles north. That's a hundred miles closer to where you are. I've decided units and measurements of distance are bullshit. With you there are only two distances that matter:
Here.
Not here.
You are not here.
- Drew — Penny Reid

There is just something about women who spend hours and hours knitting a sweater with mind-blowingly expensive yarn, when they could just buy a sweater for a fraction of the price - not to mention the time saved doing so - that lends itself to acceptance and patience for the human condition. — Penny Reid

The color of her eyes was mossy gold. It make me want to write crap poetry and hire a skywriter. Quinn Sullivan — Penny Reid

Janie makes me a better person."

She gave mea small smile before she turned to the front of the chapel. "You make yourself a better person. Janie is just a reminder of why it's worth it. — Penny Reid

I'm after a woman who likes sex but doesn't put the lust part above the intelligence part. She could have a hundred partners for all I care, just as long as they've been vetted for psychopathic tendencies. I have four rules. Number one: don't invite a person into your body if you wouldn't invite her into your kitchen. Number two: the act needs to take place in a clean environment. Number three: precautions need to be taken to protect from disease and pregnancy. And Number four: don't ration the passion, i.e. put you best fuck forward. — Penny Reid

If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane." - Robert Frost — Penny Reid

Everyone else said I was cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. — Penny Reid

Marie, you are the sine to my cosine."
My eyelashes fluttered and so did my heart, but I managed to tease, "Are you saying we'll never be on the same wavelength?"
He moved his head to the side as though considering my words. "More like, we complement each other. In basic trigonometry terms, cosine is the sine of the complementary or co-angle."
"I took trigonometry in high school. All I remember is pi r squared."
"I would argue that pie are round, but whatever gives you a right angle." He shrugged.
I laughed, even though the joke was painfully punny, and my hopes took his words as permission to start the countdown clock on their evil little space rocket. — Penny Reid

I am glad you think I am all those things, and I believe you. But I'm not going to magically think I'm beautiful or perfect or talented just because you do. I have to get there for myself. I have to believe those things for myself - not because I have a boyfriend who values me and thinks I invented airplane neck pillows. If I base my self-worth on someone else's opinion or view of me, then I will also base my lack of worth on that person's opinion as well. And that has the potential of tearing me to pieces. — Penny Reid

I once tried being dramatic when I was fourteen. My mother told me to add it to the calendar. — Penny Reid

We don't believe in false pleasantries around these parts, nor do we kick a fella when he's down. So I'll just say, bless your heart, and leave it at that. — Penny Reid

The beauty of human relationships is sharing burdens?" "More or less. But burdens don't grow lighter if both people are contributing equally. Life isn't a fifty-fifty split, that's just being lazy. Burdens are weightless, worlds change, and love endures when both people are contributing their maximum. — Penny Reid

You think being mean is enough. Being mean and being smart is better — Penny Reid

Do you want to tell me what happened? Why were those bikers chasing you?" Jessica's gaze bounced between us.

"They were upset I switched their tampons with Depends." Cletus sounded so serious and reasonable, I almost believed him. And I'd been there. — Penny Reid

Duane, you remember when we were kids? And we used to argue about everything? I mean, it didn't matter what it was. If I said the sky was blue you would say it was purple."
"Sometimes the sky is purple. Right now it's indigo, almost black. You can't just make a unilateralstatement that the sky is blue."
"See? This is what I'm talking about — Penny Reid

I have two sisters, and I tell them this all the time. Be the marriage girl. Don't be the hook-up girl. Don't be her. She's stupid and shallow. Yes, she gets lots of male attention, dressing in her sexy lumberjack or sexy nun costumes ... for a time. But then she's used up, hardened, disillusioned and desperate, because no one stays with the hook-up girl. — Penny Reid

I was always running after her, but this time I wasn't going to let her get away. — Penny Reid

No. Since I first saw you. Since I first laid eyes on you and felt sorry for every beautiful thing that was made no longer resplendent - nullified by your being. — Penny Reid

I think you need to give me a pet name - a term of endearment."
His face was its typical impassive mask, but I could tell that I'd surprised him.
Finally, he said, "Like ... babe?"
"No - that feels awkward and wrong and has undertones of pedophilia. I'm thinking of something more age appropriate, yet affectionate. — Penny Reid

His confession felt like finding out my cat - Sir Edmund Hillary, named after the first man to climb Mt Everest - could talk and wanted to give me a tongue bath. At best, Sir Hillary was indifferent to my existence. At worst, he may have been plotting my demise. He was an audacious Calico psychopath, always pushing his litterbox from its place beside the toilet in the bathroom directly in front of the shower, but only when I was in the shower ... — Penny Reid

Although it seemed like such a simple thing, for the first time in my life I realized the importance of an introduction. An introduction by a mutual friend buys instant credibility, especially when the mutual friend was universally liked - as — Penny Reid

That is why I don't want a cell phone. I don't want a droopy fin. — Penny Reid

When people are overwhelmed, they can't see past their own campfire. — Penny Reid

I love you wildly, madly, completely, Fiona Archer," he growled, then groaned on a broken breath. "I love you always. — Penny Reid

You've had a stick shoved so high up your ass all night, I'm surprised you can't taste it. — Penny Reid

Greg cut in thoughtfully, "Not to play devil's advocate - "
At this, we all scoffed. All of us. Even Quinn. Synchronized eye-rolling.
Greg clutched his chest and turned an offended look on his wife. "Et tu, Fiona? Et. Tu."
"Please." Fiona gave her husband a dry look. "You have an honorary degree in advocacy for the devil from Harvard."
"And you passed the bar in the sixth circle of hell." Matt grinned.
"Just get on with it," Quinn mumbled under his breath, — Penny Reid

Martin wasn't smiling, but his eyes were warm and interested. "Do you always talk like that?"
"Like what? Like awesome?"
"Yeah, like awesome. — Penny Reid

You are so adorable. I just want to take you home and put you in my pocket."

I'd prefer her pants, but I guess I'd settle for her pocket — Penny Reid

I didn't want to be peed on. — Penny Reid

I know how birth control works, big brother, and - spoiler alert - putting a wrapper on the banana is ninety-nine percent effective. — Penny Reid

I hated longing. I hated it almost as much as I hated pining. It sapped the mind of good judgment, filled the heart with achiness, and distracted the vagina from other potential conquests. — Penny Reid

I wanted to tell her how I truly loathed cell phones. I hated the way they made me feel reachable twenty-four hours a day; it was akin to having a chip implanted in your brain that tracked your location and told you what to think and do until, finally, you became completely obsessed with the tiny touch screen as the sole interface between your existence and the real world. — Penny Reid

Nothing was worse than a handsome guy who became an ignorant toad when he spoke. — Penny Reid

There, there." Fruit cake. "Calm down - " "Don't — Penny Reid

Realization of his philandering arrived via an empty condom wrapper tucked in the back pocket of his jeans as I, the dutifully dumb girlfriend, decided to do him a favor by throwing some of his laundry in with mine. — Penny Reid

If I were a function, you would be my asymptote. I always tend toward you. — Penny Reid

More recently, my father has been impressed with how Billy basically started at the bottom of Payton Mills and has worked himself up to South East Region Vice President."

Cletus frowned. "Is that his title?"

"My father thinks so. And he's certain Billy wants to run for state senate. Both my parents like the idea of having a son-in-law in politics. I think that's why they like Jackson so much. I know he has plans to run for office."

"Jackson would make a great politician."

"I thought you didn't like Jackson?"

"I don't. Saying someone would make a great politician is like saying someone would make a great serial killer. It's not a compliment. — Penny Reid

Kaitlyn Parker has popped Martin Sandeke's spooning cherry." I felt his smile grow just before he said, "It's only fair. I hope to pop your forking cherry. — Penny Reid

Look at them. Where are they looking? They're not looking at each other, they're not looking at the art on the wall or the sun in the sky; they're looking at their phones. They hang on to every beep and alert and tweet and status update. I don't want to be that. I'm distracted enough as it is by the actual, tangible, physical world. I've embraced the efficiency of a desktop PC for work and research, and I even use a laptop on my own time, but I draw the line at a cell phone. If I want social media, I'll join a book club. I will not be collared and leashed and tracked like a tagged orca in the ocean. — Penny Reid

He was so silly. So I said, Duane, you are so silly. — Penny Reid

Okay." I crossed my arms over my chest. "My type has a romantic soul. He'll make my brain and my heart fight over who gets him first. He does what's right, even when it's not easy - actually, especially when it's not easy. He knows the value of discipline, education, honor, and restraint. And his strength of character is the only thing that outweighs the strength of his love for me." Drew's — Penny Reid

I do quite like the idea of mutual ownership. — Penny Reid

But love is the greatest adventure, where you risk the most for the greatest reward. — Penny Reid

He paid the check and I objected. Alex was a waiter and, for better or worse, I was pretty sure I made quite a lot more than he did. But I didn't press the issue because my objection was met with an insulted glare and stony silence.
Usually I don't dispute or offer to go halfsies. Maybe I'm old-fashioned, maybe it's because my father brainwashed me, or maybe I'm a free-loading cow who is a blight on feminist principles, but I typically staunchly believe the man should pay for dinner, especially if it's early in the relationship. — Penny Reid

You're going to wear that?" Jackson lifted his chin, indicating my outfit. I glanced down at myself. Seeing nothing wrong with my blue jeans, hiking boots, and long-sleeved purple Henley with the top four buttons undone. I returned Jackson's scowl with a frown. "And what's wrong with what I'm wearing?" "Your shirt is half undone, your boobs are busting out, and those jeans are awfully tight." I crossed my arms under my chest and glared at my brother. "Are you calling me fat?" "No. I'm saying that outfit doesn't leave much to the imagination. I don't want that Winston boy getting ideas." Meanwhile, I wanted Duane to get lots of ideas. — Penny Reid

Look! It's Quinn's card! He gave it to me last night before we left the club."
I stared at it for a minute before I responded, "Oh. Are you going to call him? — Penny Reid

has been no one else since you. No one." His mouth was hot on my skin, devouring me. "You're all I think about, all I want. You are everything. — Penny Reid

I once went on a date with a guy who chewed with his mouth open. It was like sitting across from a garbage disposal. — Penny Reid

I walked into Elizabeth's apartment feeling like a zombie. I needed brains. — Penny Reid

You should have me there as your representative to make sure he doesn't try to zap you with his sexy ray."
"Zap me with his sexy ray?"
"You know what I'm talking about. I barely saw him and I'm feeling the effects. He's like an ... electromagnetic pulse of sexy or something. So does his friend, Eric. They shouldn't be allowed in public."
"That's not how electromagnets work."
"Whatever. You get my point. — Penny Reid

He closed his eyes and grew rigid beneath me. "Don't give me that look."

"What look? Your eyes are closed, you can't see me."

"I feel the look. It's the Fiona death stare of cruel disappointment."

"I have a cruel disappointed look?"

"Yes. It's like getting a spanking, and not the good kind. — Penny Reid

The rest of me was gorging itself on pity party pie. — Penny Reid