Nina LaCour Quotes & Sayings

I remember thinking that I looked like the kind of person I would want to know if I just happened to meet myself. — Nina LaCour

I don't know if I still love her in the way I used to, but I still find her just as beautiful. — Nina LaCour

All the things we could be doing now if she weren't busy wondering if the world holds better things for her than me. — Nina LaCour

You've never told him", Violet says. It's not a question. It's obvious.
"I tell him all the time - I just make sure it's never when he's listening. I say it when he's in the other room, or when he's asleep, or when the music's really loud. Sometimes he asks me what I just said. And I tell him never mind. Or I make up something else, something that isn't 'I love you'. — Nina LaCour

The sun stopped shining for me is all. The whole story is: I am sad. I am sad all the time and the sadness is so heavy that I can't get away from it. Not ever. — Nina LaCour

If things happen for a reason, I was meant to get fucked over. — Nina LaCour

What I'm trying to say is that I just want to know you. You don't have to be at your best. We can't all be at our best all the time. But, I just want to know you. — Nina LaCour

I wish you more happiness than can fit in a person. — Nina LaCour

Dignity is overrated. You know what trumps dignity? Kissing. — Nina LaCour

If only I had something to take the edge off the loneliness. If only lonely were a more accurate word. It should sound much less pretty. — Nina LaCour

It was the moment I realized what music can do to people, how it can make you hurt and feel so good all at once. — Nina LaCour

It sucks to lose your best friend, even if only to distance. Even when it isn't really losing her at all. — Nina LaCour

Whatever I decide, I might be making a mistake. But if I'm going to make a mistake I want it to be passionate — Nina LaCour

As much as I had wanted a love story out of a movie, I know now that movies can only hope to to capture this kind of love. — Nina LaCour

I leaned over the sink, closer to my reflection, and stare at myself hard. I don't know what I see. I don't even know what I want to see. — Nina LaCour

When you live in LA and work in the movies, you experience the collapse of some of that fantasy. You know that the eyes glow like that because of lights placed at a specific angle, and you see the actresses up close and, yes, they are beautiful, but they are human size and imperfect like the rest of us. — Nina LaCour

And then we get new homes that we make for ourselves. — Nina LaCour

There are so many things that I want so badly to tell you but I just can't. — Nina LaCour

Because in the conversation beneath this one, what we're really saying is I am an imperfect person. Here are my failures. Do you want me anyway? — Nina LaCour

You get close to people. You get farther from them. You learn how much you love them, and then you say good-bye, believing that you will be together again, someday, when your lives curve back into one another's. — Nina LaCour

The words make sense, but deeper than the words is the truth. She's right. If Mabel's talking about the girl who hugged her good-bye before she left for Los Angeles, who laced fingers with her at the last bonfire of the summer and accepted shells from almost-strangers, who analyzed novels for fun and lives with her grandfather in a pink, rent-controlled house in the Sunset that often smelled like cake and was often filled with elderly, gambling men - if she's talking about that girl, then yes, I dissapeared. — Nina LaCour

I just want all my friends to be happy. And sometimes you have to do that one friend at a time. — Nina LaCour

I wonder what would happen if I stopped walking, if I let the crowd fill up the space between us. Would he notice? Would he wade back to find me? Or would he keep going, because forward is his destination and I am not? — Nina LaCour

There's still this thing that happens after you break up with
someone. It barely takes any time to work. All you have to do
is continue with your life, and then when you find yourself in a
room with her again it's as if you're a different person. Maybe
your posture is a little more confident. Maybe your laughter is
louder. You're wearing perfume she's never smelled before and
you have a new way of pinning back your hair. You don't even
have to say anything because your presence alone is enough to
say Look at who I am without you. — Nina LaCour

I sort through the letters and pull out what I need for the beginning. They snap easily into place. And even though I thought I would need every letter, I finish the first sentence and realize that it's all I have left to say.
I MISS YOU. — Nina LaCour

There's something fairy-tale-like about it, which is perfect, because fairy tales are all about innocence and ill will and the inevitability of terrible things. They're all about the moment when a girl is no longer who she once was — Nina LaCour

It isn't the happy ending Ingrid and I had dreamed up, but it's all a part of what I'm working through. The way life changes. The way people and things disappear. Then appear, unexpectedly, and hold you close. — Nina LaCour

I was such a quiet kid, so shy and calm and in my own head. Of course I knew about being sad. Maybe that's the reason I saved all the things I thought were pretty. — Nina LaCour

We have photographed the trip we were supposed to have. The one where all any of us felt was happy, and the world was only beautiful, and all of the colors were the brightest versions of themselves. — Nina LaCour

Crushes are supposed to be fun, aren't they? They definitely aren't supposed to be so torturous. — Nina LaCour

I wonder if there's a secret current that connects people who have lost something. Not in the way that everyone loses something, but in the way that undoes your life, undoes your self, so that when you look at your face it isn't yours anymore. — Nina LaCour

She lets go.
Touch me again, I want to tell her. But I don't. — Nina LaCour

But it feels different because wanting someone is not the same as loving her, and now I understand that Morgan does not love me. — Nina LaCour

Yearning is a red-haired girl sitting on the hood of her silver sedan, reading about Marilyn Monroe. A cherry orchard at night, houselights in the distance. It's the painstaking neatness of a paint-by-number sunset, a yellowed letter held between graceful fingers, a cautious step into the sun-filled lobby of a famous hotel.
It's the way I feel every time I think about Ava. — Nina LaCour

There are still Ava Maddoxes to find and sets to create and girls to kiss and colleges to attend. It's possible that someday I will hear a patsy Cline song and the heartbreak will barely register. It will be some distant, buried feeling. I won't remember how much it once hurt. — Nina LaCour

There is an indescribable feeling that comes from being desperately in love with a song. — Nina LaCour

From the top of Castro Street, it looks like a river of people. It looks, I realize, like a march - rows and rows of people, gathered to exert their power. Only this time we aren't marching. We don't need to show our numbers to show our worth. This time our power comes from staying in this space, from walking the hallowed ground of our history and bringing it to life. I am alone, yes. But I am a part of everything. I feel it - I've been living in a world, but what I have is a universe. — Nina LaCour

There used to be days that I thought I was okay, or at least that I was going to be. We'd be hanging out somewhere and everything would just fit right and I would think 'it will be okay if it can just be like this forever' but of course nothing can ever stay just how it is forever. — Nina LaCour

We all get so afraid. We need to be brave. — Nina LaCour

When you love someone, you are sure. You don't need time to decide. You don't say stop and start over and over, like you're playing some kind of sport. You know the immensity of what you have and you protect it. — Nina LaCour

He wipes tears off my face and then snot. He uses his hands. He loves me that much. — Nina LaCour

It isn't the happy ending that Ingrid and I have dreamed up, but it's all a part of what I'm working through. The way life changes. The way people and things disappear. Then appear, unexpectedly, and had you close — Nina LaCour

Her suicide shook me deeply. It changed so much about how I view myself, the work I do with all of you. — Nina LaCour

I want to tell you all the sad things, and then you will know me better than other people know me and that means we are reserved for one another. — Nina LaCour

There are degrees of obsession, of awareness, of grief, of insanity. — Nina LaCour

I never realized what a big deal that was. How amazing it is to find someone who wants to hear about all the things that go on in your head. You just think that things will stay the way they are. You never look up, in a moment that feels like every other moment in your life, and think, "Soon this will be over". But I understand more now. About the way life works. — Nina LaCour

We felt so small with the city lights stretching forever below us, and we yelled at the top of our lungs because we were just these small humans but we felt more longing than could ever fit inside us. — Nina LaCour

When you're friends with someone for such a long, it's easy to feel like she belongs to you, like the version of the person you became friends with is the only version. — Nina LaCour

Searching, always. And yes, we all are, or soon will be, disenchanted, I still want to know it all: the heartbreak, the fear, the friendship, the anger, the love. All of it. — Nina LaCour

What's the use in waiting until the right moment if that moment never comes?" I say. "What if the moment escapes you in a split second when your focus was elsewhere? — Nina LaCour

My best friend is dead, and I could have saved her. It's so wrong so completely and painfully wrong, that I walked through my front door tonight smiling. — Nina LaCour

I imagine what would happen if everyone turned their regrets into wishes, went around shouting them. — Nina LaCour

We take a last look out of the window at the night, and I send a silent wish to everyone out there for this kind of warmth. — Nina LaCour

I think that people who make judgements about other people they don't even know are shallow, and people who start rumors are shallow, and I really don't care what shallow people say about me. — Nina LaCour

I'll be better, so I won't want it to hurt anymore. — Nina LaCour

Then, without really realizing it, I start to think of one thing I did wrong for each tree I look at. Wide oak - I didn't tell anyone when Ingrid cut herself. Baby oak - the time I told her I was getting sick of hearing about Jayson's arms and his blue shirt. Tall tree with bare branches - the way I would leave when she got depressed and stopped talking. I should have stayed. I should have just sat quietly , so she knew I was with her. — Nina LaCour

All through my chest and my stomach is this regret over what I'm doing to Dylan, in my hands and my feet is this electricity at the thought of Taylor leaning close to me, and all over my whole body, way, deep inside it, is this hurting over Ingrid. I could scream at the top of my lungs and the sound I would make wouldn't be half as loud as I'd need it to be. — Nina LaCour

We love films because they make us feel something. They speak to our desires, which are never small. They allow us to escape and to dream and to gaze into eyes that are impossibly beautiful and huge. They fill us with longing. But also. They tell us to remember; they remind us of life. Remember, they say, how much it hurts to have your heart broken. Remember about death and suffering and the complexities of living. Remember what it is like to love someone. Remember how it is to be loved. Remember what you feel in this moment. Remember this. Remember this. — Nina LaCour

I could keep going forever, listing all my flaws in order from the most innocuous to the least. I am afraid of spiders ... I fall in love too easily ... I have fierce spells of self-doubt. — Nina LaCour

No," I say. "I didn't know that," and as I say it I feel flooded with bitterness at all the things Ingrid kept secret from me. — Nina LaCour

My room is so quiet and empty it hurts. — Nina LaCour

And we step off the curb, all of us together, as if to say: Here we come. Through hard days and good ones, through despair and through exhilaration, in love and out of love, for just now or for forever. Here we come. It's our parade. — Nina LaCour

It's incredible," she says, "how much damage everyone does to everybody else. — Nina LaCour

Friendship is about more than facts. It's about knowing what someone is thinking, or knowing enough to know that you don't. But I guess it's also about not letting too much time go by without asking them questions, so you don't end up looking at them one afternoon, the sun so bright you have to squint, realizing that you hardly recognize the person they've become. — Nina LaCour

When I think of all of us then, I see how we were in danger. Not because of the drinking or the sex or the hour of the night. But because we were so innocent and we didn't even know it. There's no way of getting it back. The confidence. The easy laughter. The sensation of having left home only for a little while. Of having a home to return to. We — Nina LaCour

They weren't cheap and I was almost broke. It was a choice between dinner and flowers and I chose flowers because it was a dark time in my life and my room was hideous and my heart was broken and I needed something beautiful. — Nina LaCour

All I have is a life's worth of school days. What came before school I can't remember. You can only sketch so many desks and teachers and chalkboards. You can only come home to so many dinners and homework assignments and nights of taking the garbage out. You can only go to so many museum field trips before you start to wonder, Is this it? — Nina LaCour

That girl she was trying to reach- she must have been running from something. She must have been someone special, for her friend to keep trying so hard. Too bad she was gone now. — Nina LaCour

We were miraculous.
We were beach creatures.
We had treasures in our pockets and each other on our skin. — Nina LaCour

I know," I say. "It sucks. Let's go get tacos and sit on the beach. — Nina LaCour

I think that sometimes people want something so much that they manifest it. Or at least they try to. — Nina LaCour

It's the opposite of the collapse of the fantasy.
It's what happens when the illusion pales in comparison to the truth. I'm seeing her for the first time. Not Ava Garden Wilder, the rags-to-riches granddaughter of Clyde Jones. Not a tragic, romantic heroine.
Just Ava.
And I am utterly in love. — Nina LaCour

How amazing it is to find someone who wants to hear about all the things that go on in your head. — Nina LaCour

My mom says Ingrid's name and I start to hum, not the melody to a song, just one drawn-out note. I know it makes me seem crazy, I know it won't make anything change, but it's better than crying, it's better than screaming, it's better than listening to what they're telling me. — Nina LaCour

It's an ache. A heavy sadness. The kind that is brought on by heartbreak and then perpetuated by everything that reminds you of the way it's broken. The kind that feels impossible to shrug off or tuck away. But there is another feeling, too, surfacing, and soon I discover that it's the kind that makes the heartbreak almost something to savor because it is so simple and true. — Nina LaCour

And I want to tell you about everything but I can't because I couldn't stand for you to have that look on your face all the time. I just need you to look at me and think that I'm normal. I just really need that from you. — Nina LaCour

There's nothing stupid about wanting to be loved. Believe me. — Nina LaCour

And then she is kissing me, right here on the sidewalk on a foggy summer night. Violet is kissing me, and everything is perfect. The kiss doesn't end. We are not two girls on a polite first date, bestowing a customary good-night peck.
No.
We are kissing like girls who have ached for each other for years who never even spoke but somehow exchanged I love yous anyway. — Nina LaCour

I sleep through the next day. Each time I go to the bathroom, I try not to look in the mirror. Once, I catch my reflection: it looks like I've been punched in both eyes.
I can't talk about the day that follows that. — Nina LaCour

I'll make a swing so I can reach the places I can't reach yet. — Nina LaCour

Maybe it doesn't matter, maybe if we all force ourselves to act like we're okay even if we're not, eventually things will get better. — Nina LaCour

Ingrid's skin was the smoothest texture, so pale that it was transparent. I could see the blue veins that ran down her arms, and they made her seem fragile somehow. the way Eric Daniels, my first boyfriend, seemed fragile when I laid my head on his chest and heart his heart beating and thought, Oh. People don't always remember about the blood and the heartbeat. But whenever I looked at Ingrid, I was reminded of the things that kept her alive. — Nina LaCour

She was never something waiting to be solved. All she is - all she's ever been - is a person trying to live a life. — Nina LaCour

I've been waiting for this for so long
something new, life after high school. — Nina LaCour

When you really want to find someone, it isn't that hard. I should have known all along that she wasn't looking. I feel so stupid.
There's nothing stupid about wanting to be loved. — Nina LaCour

In just a little while we will forget all the things we used to want and adjust to the lives that we're given. — Nina LaCour

The ocean is far below us, but the waves crash so loudly, sound close enough to drown us. — Nina LaCour

We were nostalgic for a time that wasn't yet over. — Nina LaCour

Even if I couldn't get into the dark places in her head, I would at least be there waiting on the outside. — Nina LaCour

People take one another for granted — Nina LaCour

YOu just think that things will stay the way they are. You never look up, in a moment that feels like every other moment of your life, and think, "Soon this will be over". — Nina LaCour

He is Romeo, and he is heartbroken. Every word is wistful. When he says, 'O, teach me how I should forget to think!' I, for the first time, see what the big deal is about Shakespeare. — Nina LaCour

How does your life move forward, when all you want to do is hold still. — Nina LaCour

Here it is, all at once: rightness.
Not the graffiti itself, even though it's undeniably spectacular, but this feeling of making plans and carrying them them through, of meeting people and getting to know them, of being asked to do something and saying Yes, of wanting something, asking for it, making it happen. — Nina LaCour

I wonder if we will become okay again. I hope for it. — Nina LaCour

We love films because they makes us feel something. They speak to our desires, which are never small. They allow us to escape and to dream and to gaze into the eyes that are impossibly beautiful and huge. They fill us with longing. But also. they tell us to remember; they remind us of life. Remember, they say, how much it hurts to have your heart broken. — Nina LaCour

Maybe there is no right thing to say. Maybe the right thing is just a myth, not really out there at all. — Nina LaCour

This was me before I knew about anything hard, when my whole life was packed lunches and art projects and spelling quizzes. — Nina LaCour

You're never going to be ready"..."Don't you see that? You have to forget about ready. If you don't, you're always going to run away — Nina LaCour

We all want to be feel something, we want to be someone to one another. — Nina LaCour