Josh Kilmer-Purcell Quotes & Sayings

But there's something flirty/sexy about his voice that's appealing to my inner romantic comedy actress.
Then again, maybe it's just his penthouse apartment I'm hearing. My inner gold digger frequently beats the crap out of my inner Meg Ryan. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

I try to make myself realize that I have learned the difference between right and wrong. That there is such a thing as right and wrong. But instead I've learned that these are things - this "right", this "wrong"- these are things that we are told. Simply told to believe. These are things we have not tested. And while most of the things we are told may be true, it is not until we have tested them, taunted them, flaunted them, that we truly know they are right. Or wrong. Or true. Or false. Or somewhere in-the-fucking-between. And I think I know now a little better which is which. And I also know I'll never quit testing this world. I'll never rely on common knowledge. Or common denominators. Or even common sense, for that matter. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

More than anything I wish he were here with me. "A relationship is an accumulation of shared history," he'd said to me once. And here I was making history without him. It's lonely. And I can't wait to go home. Parts of me are showing through my Aqua, and I'm having a hard time keeping them separate. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Gay men know that the way to a woman's heart is through her son. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

For even more "sizzle," instead of simply leading the goats out to graze as we usually did, I raced out in front of them, hollering an improvisational goat call that made me sound like a yodeling hillbilly. I turned back toward the barn and aw that the goats had stayed back, huddled together in fear in the barn doorway. They obviously preferred to skip dinner rather than get too close to the retard scarecrow suffering a grand mal seizure.

~The Bocolic Plauge, by Josh Kilmer-Purcell (2010), P. 214-215 — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Truth isn't beauty. It isn't even always true. Truth is nothing more than consistency of message.
I learned that from advertising. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Pop Salvation is a genius take on discovering who you are by becoming what you most admire. If I didn't know better, I'd think Lance Reynald watched me grow up. Marvelously endearing and insightful. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Blackouts can be fun if approached with the right mindset. You just can't sweat the fact that you've lost a small portion of your life for all eternity. Occasionally, little bubbles of memory will float up like surreal Mylar party balloons at unexpected times throughout the net day and start piecing together a colorful, if incomplete, version of reality. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

I think it's a little presumptuous on his part to think that I would want to talk to him anyway. I mean, sure, I went home with him, probably slept with him, ate breakfast with him, and wore his clothes to work the next day. None of this I see as necessarily flirtatious on my part. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

And she just wants everyone to remember -please remember- that once there was a darkly sparkling, glittering, shimmering, lovely dangerous time in this city when Aqua loved Jack.
And Jack loved Aqua.
And I loved Jack.
And Jack loved me.
And boys will be boys.
And boys will be girls.
And sometimes the show can't go on. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Once you've crawled into what's commonly thought of as the sordid underbelly of life, you realize it's all just different versions of normal. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

I'm a drag queen. I'm a celebrity trapped in a normal person's body. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

There's a strange lack of knowledge about the role of drag queens in our culture. I attribute this to the appalling state of our country's education system. Others might blame an utter lack of interest. Who am I to judge? — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Both of the twins exhibited a sort of prized Wisconsin Aryan-ness that excused them from blame for almost any caper. they looked liked the protagonists from a Disney movie but behaved like After School Specials. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

I've always thought that one of the signs of true adulthood is when you realize that you spend each Christmas trying to relive childhood memories that never really happened in the first place. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

I am not an alcoholic. I'm a social catalyst. People pay me to illustrate for other partygoers the chemical process involved in transforming from one persona into another drunker, more fun one. It's a matter of going from dull point A to exciting point B. And I'm a raving success at it. So successful that sometimes I wind up at Mysterious Point C. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Blue Boy proves that if you don't quite fit in, then you might as well stand out with as much wit, color and audacity as you can muster. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

And sometimes the show can't go on. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Don't bother asking God for answers about life. Most likely you're asking the wrong questions. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

I figured he was adhering to the adage that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't make fun of the person paying the mortgage. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Secrets that reside in the mind of one person aren't really secrets. They're unspoken fears. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

If you start buying your own bullshit, you risk becoming management material. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

While Martha's skins fell off her tomatoes like a silk slip off a supermodel, our skins got caught in the deep folds and stuck stubbornly. It was like trying to peel leather pants off of a sweaty, hairy, fat guy. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

I take a step toward him. My arm reaches up. I don't know if I'm reaching for the pipe or for him. I want to touch his skin. I want to breathe in what he breathes. The yellow swirl. I want to be the yellow swirl. I want him to breathe me in, be sent riding on oxygen molecules deep into his lungs. I want to travel through his body, seeing what makes him happy. Attaching myself to whatever place in him sparks to life on my arrival. His blood, his tissues, his muscles, I want to burrow inside the folds like a windblown dusting of snow, so that each time I melt away he seeks me out again. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

We're having Thanksgiving at our place," he said. "An old-fashioned Thanksgiving." "With drag queens and hookers and cranberry sauce?" I asked breathlessly. "Just like at Grandma's," he replied. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

No matter how beneficial a disappearing act might be for me, I could never tear myself away from a show in progress. Even when the plot's tragic ending is apparent to the entire audience. Perhaps there's a deus ex machina that will lower from the ceiling and turn the whole debacle into a romantic comedy. never can tell. Paid the full ticket price, might as well stay. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell

New York doesn't leave a lot of time for pondering forks in the road. People who have paused to gather their wits often find themselves suddenly waking up in a cookie-cutter beige apartment in Hoboken. I will not ever leave New York. I don't know how long it takes to become a true New Yorker, but I assume that if I die here ... that would qualify me. — Josh Kilmer-Purcell