Grady Hendrix Quotes & Sayings

Corn dogs," the exorcist said, "are all the proof I need that there is a God. — Grady Hendrix

All over Russia, bears were depressed. The Yeti were moving west. This was due to global warming, but the bears hadn't gone to university so they didn't understand the bigger picture. All they knew was that one day bears were the best animals, and the next these strange creatures were punching them in the face and eating all their salmon and berries. — Grady Hendrix

Let's make sure it's really raining before we worry about floods. — Grady Hendrix

There are enough people running around in here. It's starting to feel like an episode of Scooby-Doo. — Grady Hendrix

The walls of her stall were covered with graffiti. If it had been funny ("Pull here for MFA Degree" right below the toilet paper dispenser) she would've stayed longer, but it was mostly weird random names and dates. — Grady Hendrix

Something I learned from the Serbian tribes. Churches are built where saints were martyred. A bridge requires a child in its foundations if it is to hold. All great works must begin with a sacrifice. — Grady Hendrix

For Abby, "friend" is a word whose sharp corners have been worn smooth by overuse. "I'm friends with the guys in IT," she might say, or "I'm meeting some friends after work."

But she remembers when the word "friend" could draw blood. She and Gretchen spent hours ranking their friendships, trying to determine who was a best friend and who was an everyday friend, debating whether anyone could have two best friends at the same time, writing each other's names over and over in purple ink, buzzed on the dopamine high of belonging to someone else, having a total stranger choose you, someone who wanted to know you, another person who cared that you were alive. — Grady Hendrix

The problem was the liars. They said she could do anything she set her mind to, they told her she should shoot for the moon because if she missed she'd be among the stars, they made movies tricking her into thinking she could achieve heroic things. All lies. Because she was born to answer phones in call centers, to carry bags to customers' cars, to punch a clock, to measure her life in smoke breaks. To think otherwise was insane. — Grady Hendrix

I love you, Gretchen Lang. You are my reflection and my shadow and I will not let you go. We are bound together forever and ever! Until Halley's Comet comes around again. I love you dearly and I love you queerly and no demon is bigger than this! — Grady Hendrix