Charles M. Schulz Quotes & Sayings

It was a dark and stormy night. - Snoopy — Charles M. Schulz

Love is not knowing what you're talking about. — Charles M. Schulz

Lucy was using my blanket to dry the dishes ... We now have very secure dishes! — Charles M. Schulz

You know what I think my best quality is? I think I'm nice to have around. I'd hate it if I weren't around! — Charles M. Schulz

All right, team ... This is our first game of the season ... If we all show the right spirit, I think we can win this one. Let's try to encourage each other ... Let's hear a little chatter out there, okay?"
"YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL, KID! — Charles M. Schulz

Do you think if two people liked the same thing, it could bring them closer together?"
"Certainly ... Take classical music, for instance ... Two people who shared a love for Beethoven could become very close ... "
"How about TV? — Charles M. Schulz

Charlie Brown: A penny! Rats! Why couldn't I have found a nickel? What good is a penny these days? Why do things like that always happen to me?! *walks off frustrated*
Lucy: Gee, he found a penny! Why don't things like that ever happen to me? — Charles M. Schulz

Rats! Sometimes it's very difficult being a dog ... Especially when it's raining. You're looking forward to a great breakfast ... When it arrives, you're full of joyful anticipation ... Then you see the water rise in your dog dish ... And you watch your pancakes float downstream! — Charles M. Schulz

Nobody gave me what I wanted for my birthday! Nobody! What sort of presents do you call these? New shoes, a green sweater and a bunch of stupid toys!"
"What were you expecting?"
"Real estate! — Charles M. Schulz

Love is a letter on pink stationery. — Charles M. Schulz

To dance is to live! — Charles M. Schulz

Lucy: Do you think you have Pantophobia, Charlie Brown?
Charlie: I don't know, what is pantophobia?
Lucy: The fear of Everything.
Charlie: THAT'S IT!!! — Charles M. Schulz

What happened to fun?"
"Our insurance doesn't cover it! — Charles M. Schulz

I gave up trying to understand people long ago. Now I let them try to understand me! — Charles M. Schulz

I love America. It's Americans I can't stand. — Charles M. Schulz

Lucy's polls were sometimes kind of violent. — Charles M. Schulz

I think I've discovered the secret of life
you just hang around until you get used to it. — Charles M. Schulz

Try not to have a good time ... this is supposed to be educational. — Charles M. Schulz

You know, in a way, 'Dear Santa Claus' is rather stuffy ... Perhaps something a little more intimate would be better ... Something just a shade more friendly ... "
"How about 'Dear Fatty'? — Charles M. Schulz

We all need someone to kiss us goodbye — Charles M. Schulz

No one would have been invited to dinner so often as Jesus was unless he were interesting and had a sense of humor. — Charles M. Schulz

Empty?! You took all the cookies!"
"They were crying to get out of the jar ... Cookies get claustrophobia too, you know! — Charles M. Schulz

I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time. — Charles M. Schulz

Dear Valentine, I love you. Whoever you are. — Charles M. Schulz

I used to have more tolerance for these views, but I am losing patience with what I see. The test of anything is the fruit it bears. I see no good fruit being born. — Charles M. Schulz

What in the world is the matter with you?!"
"I'm a new feminist! — Charles M. Schulz

There sure are a lot of these 'instant' products on the market. Instant coffee, instant tea, instant pudding, instant cereal ... instant dislike. — Charles M. Schulz

No problem is so formidable that you can't walk away from it. — Charles M. Schulz

Schroeder, do you think love is the answer to everything?"
"Boy, I hope not! — Charles M. Schulz

You sold out! We elected you, and you sold out! The next time we have an election, I think everyone should vote for himself. Or we might just as well vote for Charlie Brown! Yes, next year we may even say, 'You're elected, Charlie Brown! — Charles M. Schulz

Beauty tips. How to look younger: Don't be born so soon. — Charles M. Schulz

The world is filled with unmarried marriage counselors. — Charles M. Schulz

It is difficult to talk about what I do, because I do it so I don't have to talk about it. — Charles M. Schulz

What can you do when you don't fit in? What can you do when life seems to be passing you by?"
"Follow me. I want to show you something. See the horizon over there? See how big this world is? See how much room there is for everybody? Have you ever seen any other worlds?"
"No."
"As far as you know, this is the only world there is, right?"
"Right."
"There are no other worlds for you to live in, right?"
"Right."
"You were born to live in this world, right?"
"Right."
"WELL LIVE IN IT THEN! Five cents please. — Charles M. Schulz

One of Beethoven's favorite dishes was macaroni and cheese. The girl I marry must be able to make good macaroni and cheese ... "
"How did Beethoven feel about cold cereal? — Charles M. Schulz

a little offending never hurt anybody — Charles M. Schulz

If I stand here, I can see the Little Red Haired girl when she comes out of her house ... Of course, if she sees me peeking around this tree, she'll think I'm the dumbest person in the world ... But if I don't peek around the tree, I'll never see her ... Which means I probably AM the dumbest person in the world ... which explains why I'm standing in a batch of poison oak. — Charles M. Schulz

I think I know what's wrong with you ... Walk up onto that pitcher's mound ... Does your stomach hurt now?"
"Yes! Ow! Ooo! Yes!"
"All right, now come down off the mound ... There ... Has it stopped hurting?"
"Yes ... Yes, I think it has!"
"There's your trouble ... Five cents, please! — Charles M. Schulz

Why is it that you don't love me?"
"Sometimes I wish I knew ... "
"Don't anybody tell him!! — Charles M. Schulz

I had to go to the school nurse yesterday because my stomach hurt ... "
"You worry too much, Charlie Brown ... No wonder your stomach hurts ... You've got to stop all this silly worrying!"
"How do I stop?"
"That's your worry! Five cents, please! — Charles M. Schulz

Sometimes you lie in bed at night, and you don't have a single thing to worry about ... That always worries me! — Charles M. Schulz

Like a ten-speed bike,most of us have gears we don't use. — Charles M. Schulz

Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone. — Charles M. Schulz

Dear Santa Claus, just a last note before you take off. I hope you have a nice trip. Don't forget to fasten your seat belt. — Charles M. Schulz

A tragic life is romantic when it happens to somebody else. — Charles M. Schulz

Love makes you do strange things ... — Charles M. Schulz

That has to be the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to me in my whole life. — Charles M. Schulz

Look at Charlie Brown's face. Would you please hold still a minute Charlie Brown? I want Linus to study your face. Now this is what you call a failure face, Linus. Notice how it has failure written all over it. Study it carefully Linus. You rarely see such a good example. Notice the deep lines, the dull vacant look in the eyes. Yes, I would say this is one of the finest examples of a failure face that your liable to see for a long while. — Charles M. Schulz

Lucy: Our teacher wants us to write an essay on praying. Charlie Brown: Praying is important when you wake up at two o'clock in the morning feeling sick from eating something dumb the day before. Lucy: I'll just say we were out of town and I didn't have time to write anything. — Charles M. Schulz

My mind reels with sarcastic replies! — Charles M. Schulz

Mr. Claus
c/o North Pole

Dear Joe... — Charles M. Schulz

I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!! — Charles M. Schulz

Well, I know about loneliness. I won't talk about it, but I was very lonely after the war. I know what it feels like to spend a whole weekend all by yourself and no one wants you at all. — Charles M. Schulz

I have a feeling that when my ship comes in I'll be at the airport. — Charles M. Schulz

See the valentine I made for Linus? On the inside, I wrote, To my sweet babboo."
"He says he's not your sweet babboo."
"What does he know? — Charles M. Schulz

Snoopy (musing on his rooftop): Good Grief! Is it November already? My life is going by too fast. I think someone pushed the "Fast Forward" button. — Charles M. Schulz

Humor is proof that everything is going to be all right with God nevertheless. — Charles M. Schulz

I guess babysitters are like used cars ... You never really know what you're getting ... — Charles M. Schulz

I'm dying and all I hear are insults! — Charles M. Schulz

The term that best describes me now is 'secular humanist.' — Charles M. Schulz

I don't know the meaning of life. I don't know why we are here. I think life is full of anxieties and fears and tears. It has a lot of grief in it, and it can be very grim. And I do not want to be the one who tries to tell somebody else what life is all about. To me it's a complete mystery. — Charles M. Schulz

Sometimes all we need is a little pampering to help us feel better ... — Charles M. Schulz

I come from a long line of generations! — Charles M. Schulz

Sometimes I ask myself questions... Sometimes I ask myself, is this your real life or is this just a pilot film? Is my life a thirty-nine week series or is it a special?"
"Whatever it is, your ratings are down... Five cents, please! — Charles M. Schulz

- Some day, we will all die, Snoopy.
- True, but on all the other days, we will not. — Charles M. Schulz

Peppermint Patty's team is short a glove, so I'm walking over to lend them mine."
"You're kidding! Don't you think they're taking advantage of you?"
"No, I'm doing it because I want to do it."
"What are you, some kind of mystic?! — Charles M. Schulz

Maybe I can put it another way ... Life, Charlie Brown, is like a deck chair."
"Like a what?"
"Have you ever been on a cruise ship? Passengers open up these canvas deck chairs so they can sit in the sun ... Some people place their chairs facing the rear of the ship so they can see where they've been ... Other people face their chairs forward ... They want to see where they're going! On the cruise ship of life, Charlie Brown, which way is your deck chair facing?"
"I've never been able to get one unfolded ... — Charles M. Schulz

These rocks are a release for my pent-up emotions. When I feel all tied up inside, I just stand here and throw rocks into that vacant lot!"
"Hello, Charlie Brown, you blockhead!"
"Sometimes I think I'm kind of a vacant lot myself ... — Charles M. Schulz

There is no greater burden than great potential. — Charles M. Schulz

All you require is adore. But just a little chocolate at times will not damage. — Charles M. Schulz

Can't you see me as king of the Hereford ranchers, Lucy?"
"Oh, I can see you, all right ... I can see you riding out on your beautiful palomino checking the herd ... There you sit, silhouetted against the evening sky ... Sucking your thumb and holding that stupid blanket! — Charles M. Schulz

I do not like a high-organized church. I think that as soon as the congregation reaches a level of one hundred or so people, it is time to build a new church. As soon as the congregation gets to the point where you are not on fairly intimate terms with every other person in that church, then you have become a theater where people can attend services. I do not think you can attend a church service. Service is not something which is there to be viewed as if it were a play or a movie. — Charles M. Schulz

A kiss on the nose does much toward turning aside anger. — Charles M. Schulz

Snoopy didn't start off being a Beagle. It's just that 'beagle' is a funny word. — Charles M. Schulz

Don't be a leaf ... Be a tree! — Charles M. Schulz

Beethoven can't really be great because his picture isn't on a bubble gum card. — Charles M. Schulz

I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong. — Charles M. Schulz

May I ask a question, Lucy?"
"Go right ahead!"
"Just why do you want to draw this line all the way around the world?"
"Well, you know the old saying, Charlie Brown ... You have to draw the line someplace! — Charles M. Schulz

Winning isn't everything, but losing isn't anything. — Charles M. Schulz

I want to be liked ... No, I want to be more than just liked ... I want people to say, "that Charlie Brown is a great guy!" And when people are at parties, I want them to look for me, and when I finally arrive, I want them to say, "here comes good ol' Charlie Brown ... Now everything will be all right!" I want to be a special person ... I want to be needed ... It's kind of hard to explain ... Do you understand? I mean, do you know what I'm talking about?" "Sure, I understand perfectly ... " "Well?" "Forget it! Five cents, please! — Charles M. Schulz

Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but it sure makes the rest of you lonely. — Charles M. Schulz

Why are you standing here, Charlie Brown?"
"I'm waiting for that little red-haired girl to walk by ... I'm going to say hello to her and ask her how she's enjoying her summer vacation, and just sort of talk to her ... You know ... "
"You'll never do it, Charlie Brown ... You'll panic ... "
"Besides that, she's already walked by! — Charles M. Schulz

Good afternoon ... My name is Lucy ... I'm going to be your right-fielder ... Our special today is a misjudged fly-ball. We also have a nice bobbled ground ball and an exellent late throw to the infield ... I'll be back in a moment to take your order. — Charles M. Schulz

There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people ... Religion, Politics, and The Great Pumpkin. — Charles M. Schulz

Five hundred years from now, who'll know the difference?! — Charles M. Schulz

Every night it's the same ... I have supper in my red dish and drinking water in my yellow dish ... Tonight I think I'll have my supper in the yellow dish and my drinking water in the red dish. Life is too short not to live it up a little! — Charles M. Schulz

It always looks darkest just before it gets totally black. — Charles M. Schulz

All right, so you believe in Santa Claus, and I'll believe in the 'Great Pumpkin.' The way I see it, it doesn't matter what you believe just so you're sincere! (Linus) — Charles M. Schulz

Cartooning will destroy you; it will break your heart. — Charles M. Schulz

Just wait and see, Charlie Brown. I'll see the Great Pumpkin. I'll SEE the Great Pumpkin! Just you wait, Charlie Brown. The Great Pumpkin will appear and I'll be waiting for him ... — Charles M. Schulz

What if everyone in the whole world suddenly decided to run away from his problems?"
"Well, at least we'd all be running in the same direction! — Charles M. Schulz

None of my kids can draw! — Charles M. Schulz

You're a good man, Charlie Brown. — Charles M. Schulz

I don't think God wants to be worshiped. I think the only pure worship of God is by loving one another, and I think all other forms of worship became a substitute for the love that we should show one another. — Charles M. Schulz

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask why me? Then a voice answers nothing personal, your name just happened to come up. — Charles M. Schulz

I feel kind of depressed today ... Do you ever have the feeling that life has passed you by?
Worse than that ... Sometimes I think life and I are going in opposite directions! — Charles M. Schulz

My anxieties have anxieties. — Charles M. Schulz

Do what is absolutely you and nobody else. — Charles M. Schulz

This is my report on how to live ... They say the best way is just to live one day at a time ... If you try to live seven days at a time, the week will be over before you know it ... — Charles M. Schulz

One night I was sitting listening to some Hank Williams songs - and they'll change your life in a hurry ... — Charles M. Schulz