These Nuts Got Em Quotes & Sayings

He stopped to rest at a cart selling nuts and candy, bought himself some Jelly Belly's, flirted just enought with the Mexican cutie working there to convince her pull out the banana-flavored one. Although he liked his Jelly Belly's mixed up, he didn't like banana, but, since it took too much effort to pull them out himself, he generally tried to talk someone else into doing it. If that didn't work, he just ate 'em.
- Kenny Traveler — Susan Elizabeth Phillips

Ol' man Simon, planted a diamond. Grew hisself a garden the likes of none. Sprouts all growin' comin' up glowin' Fruit of jewels all shinin' in the sun. Colors of the rainbow. See the sun and the rain grow sapphires and rubies on ivory vines, Grapes of jade, just ripenin' in the shade, just ready for the squeezin' into green jade wine. Pure gold corn there, Blowin' in the warm air. Ol' crow nibblin' on the amnythyst seeds. In between the diamonds, Ol' man Simon crawls about pullin' out platinum weeds. Pink pearl berries, all you can carry, put 'em in a bushel and haul 'em into town. Up in the tree there's opal nuts and gold pears- Hurry quick, grab a stick and shake some down. Take a silver tater, emerald tomater, fresh plump coral melons. Hangin' in reach. Ol' man Simon, diggin' in his diamonds, stops and rests and dreams about one ... real ... peach. — Shel Silverstein

Glory: I look around at this world you're so eager to be a part of and all I see is six billion lunatics looking for the fastest ride out. Who's not crazy? Look around, everyone's drinking, smoking, shooting up, shooting each other, or just plain screwing their brains out 'cause they don't want 'em anymore. I'm crazy? Honey, I'm the original one-eyed chicklet in the kingdom of the blind, 'cause at least I admit the world makes me nuts. — Douglas Petrie

Life is real, reality is not a dream.
Those who chose to sleep ... I wake em up,
Cause you're sleepin with your mouth open hummin deez nuts. — King Sun

Girls like you want to cut guy's nuts off and hang 'em from your rearview mirror. — Simone Elkeles

Women. Can't live with 'em, pass the beer nuts. — George Wendt

I want to make sure I don't interfere with the success of that team next year. I don't see any way I could go to practice like most of 'em do, and not hurt the team. I'd go nuts if I tried doing that. — Bear Bryant

You think nuts don't apply to the FBI? We get 'em all the time. A man in a Moe hairpiece applied in St. Louis last week. He had a bazooka, two rockets, and a bearskin shako in his golf bag." "Did you hire him? — Thomas Harris

Go nuts, girlfriend." He grins, making his face instantly more familiar. "I told 'em we met when we were both looking after Jamie. But I skipped the part about taking off my pants and daring you to find out if Wesley's massage chair would turn my dick into a real-life vibrator. — Sarina Bowen

Say my shoe game nuts so I call em cashews Every other city it's another Nicki tattoo — Nicki Minaj

I'll tell ya one thing
the jail house is jus' a kind a way a drivin' a guy slowly nuts. See? An' they go nuts, an' you see 'em an' hear 'em, an' pretty soon you don' know if you're nuts or not. When they get to screamin' in the night sometimes you think it's you doin' the screamin'
an' sometimes it is. — John Steinbeck

I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up. — Red Skelton

They-" He stopped and just blinked at me for a minute. "You know, people are always saying that you're cuckoo. Looney Tunes. Off the freaking edge. But I tell 'em, no, she's okay. She's got some ... anger management issues. But you know what? They're right. You're nuts. — Karen Chance