Sticker Quotes & Sayings

A lot of people don't like bumper stickers. I don't mind bumper stickers. To me a bumper sticker is a shortcut. It's like a little sign that says 'Hey, let's never hang out.' — Demetri Martin

Sex gets people killed, put in jail, beaten up, bankrupted, and disgraced, to say nothing of ruined - personally, politically, and professionally. Looking for sex can lead to misfortune, and if you get lucky and find it, it can leave you maimed, infected, or dead. Other than that, it's swell: the great American pastime ... You probably won't see it on a bumper sticker, but sex kills. — Edna Buchanan

The car bumper sticker for the discerning Sydney motorist, 'Is it true, or did Alan Jones tell you?', should be letter-boxed around the country. — Kerry-Anne Walsh

I fantasized bout how I'd use my free hour at school. Organize my sticker album or tend to my vast My Little Pony herd. You know, things that would contribute to my future. — Felicia Day

Q: How do you drown a blonde? A: Place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool. — Various

I just ordered a Life Alert bracelet, so if I get a life, I'll be notified immediately. - BUMPER STICKER I — Darynda Jones

The only decoration on the gray segments of her cubicle was a bumper sticker, AT LEAST THE WAR ON THE ENVIRONMENT IS GOING WELL. Her colleagues' cubicles were covered with photos — Jonathan Franzen

The more you complain the longer God lets you live — Bertrand Russell

If you are explaining, you're losing. It's a bumper sticker culture. People have to get it like that, and if they don't, if it takes three seconds to make them understand, you're off their radar screen. Three seconds to understand, or you lose. This is our problem. — Lawrence Lessig

Many people had been sold religion with a nice Jesus sticker slapped on it. Many people had been burned by so-called Christians. Many people had been abused, hurt, mistreated, and maligned all in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. But what their souls were craving was the true Jesus. The One who heals. The One who redeems. The One who gives life. — Jefferson Bethke

People who are running for office mislead the American people by saying that there's a three-point plan or a bumper sticker kind of way of bringing down gasoline prices. The fact of the matter is that nobody can do that. The price of oil is set on the global economy. People who have looked at this closely and hard know that's the case. — Ken Salazar

There's a kind of decadence about all this: If 9/11 was really an inside job, you wouldn't be driving around with a bumper sticker bragging that you were on to it. Fantasy is a by-product of security: it's the difference between hanging upside down in your dominatrix's bondage parlor after work on Friday and enduring the real thing for years on end in Saddam's prisons ... — Mark Steyn

There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker. — Charles M. Schulz

I've always loved reading fantasy. I used to pick out all the books in the library that had the little unicorn sticker on the side to show that they were fantasy. — Maggie Stiefvater

I love children, but I don't think I can eat a whole one.- Bumper sticker — Darynda Jones

With a lightning quick glance at me first, he reads one bumper sticker: Member: BBB. Boys in Books are Better? — Anne Eliot

Look, Adam said. He rubbed a finger over the dust of the back window. Next to a Blink-182 sticker was an Aglionby decal. — Maggie Stiefvater

I must confess, when I see anyone with an Obama 2012 bumper sticker, I recognize them as a threat to the gene pool. — Allen West

We were all hit with sticker shock: $87 billion is a huge number. — Zack Wamp

Further movements are not recommended," said Mr. Croup, helpfully. "Mister Vandemar might have a little accident with his old toad-sticker. Most accidents do occur in the home. Is that not so, Mister Vandemar?"
"I don't trust statistics," said Mr. Vandemar's blank voice. — Neil Gaiman

Rina!" I shouted, but the radio was up loud -something sad and gooey- and she didn't hear me. I hit the horn, twice, startling the minivan with a Pro-Choice sticker in front of me, which quickly changed lanes. We kept cruising neck and neck, with Rina full-out brawling now, singing along with the radio, tears running down her face, completely oblivious to both me and the speed limit. I reached under my seat and searched around until I came up with an empty plastic Coke bottle, which I then hurled at her windshield. she jerked back from the wheel as it bounced off, then whipped her around, eyes wide, and finally saw me.
"Shit!" she screamed, hitting the automatic window control to open the one nearest me. "What the hell are you doing? — Sarah Dessen

Ian once suggested that in addition to the mystery stickers and the sci-fi and animal ones, there should be special stickers for books with happy endings, books with sad endings, books that will trick you into reading the next in the series. 'There should be ones with big teardrops,' he said, 'like for the side of Where the Red Fern Grows. Because otherwise it isn't fair. Like maybe you're accidentally reading it in public, and then everyone will make fun of you for crying.' But what could I affix to the marvelous and perplexing tale of Ian Drake? A little blue sticker with a question mark, maybe. Crossed fingers. A penny in a fountain. — Rebecca Makkai

The only person I compete with is Satan. If that happens to be you, then could you please move out of the way? You're standing in Christ's spot. — Shannon L. Alder

We have rules in the house and a sticker chart for my kids to earn technology time. Maybe its because of the world I live in and work, that I don't see much of anything beneficial that comes out of social media for kids. Even though its how they communicate now, so you have to find the fine balance. — Gretchen Carlson

How I treat a brother or sister from day to day, how I react to the sin-scarred wino on the street, how I respond to interruptions from people I dislike, how I deal with normal people in their normal confusion on a normal day may be a better indication of my reverence for life than the antiabortion sticker on the bumper of my car. — Brennan Manning

I'm not a big drinker and I've had enough secondhand smoke for this decade and the next, so ... "
Great. All she had to do was complain about the deafening volume of the music, and she might as well slap a sticker on her forehead saying old next to the one that already said nerd.
"Band's good, though," she added. "Country's not my thing, but the players are ... proficient." And great, now she sounded like a professor. Proficient. God.
But he was nodding. "Country's not my thing, either."
"But you have a cowboy hat," she said, and as soon as the words left her lips, she realized how stupid she sounded, no - not that she sounded, but that she was. — Suzanne Brockmann

Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy — Fran Lebowitz

I think happiness is a choice. I believe luck is your attitude. It sounds like a really annoying bumper sticker. But there is such a great truth in that. You choose how you want to feel about what happens to you. I could have been a miserable failure. I haven't had anybody looking over me, and I've found my own way through optimistic exploration and fire-burning mistakes. I am a very happy person with an extraordinary life, so I must be doing a lot of things right. I really believe when you peel away the layers, the worlds is a beautiful place filled with beautiful people. — Drew Barrymore

I like the bumper sticker that reads, "Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven." But that does not give us license to live below God's standard. — Billy Graham

[My father ] came home from World War II and he voted for [Dwight] Eisenhower. He was pretty thoughtful about those things, but never, as I said, ever campaigned for anybody. He let me put a [Barry] Goldwater sticker on his pickup truck, but he never put a bumper sticker on his car. We never had a yard sign or anything in our yards, never contributed to anybody's campaign. — Jeff Sessions

My colleague Senator John Ensign of Nevada told me a story that epitomizes the selfishness of our culture: When I was a teenager, I had a sticker in my car with a picture of a bear scratching himself on the tree, and under it was the saying, 'If it feels good, do it!' That was the motto of the '60s and the '70s, and certainly it is the motto today. The image of the bear scratching himself highlights a view of human beings as animals, and that people should do what pleases them at the moment without a thought to the broader long-term consequences of their actions. — Rick Santorum

The dog always dies. Go to the library and pick out a book with an award sticker and a dog on the cover. Trust me, that dog is going down. — Gordon Korman

If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly. — Ashleigh Brilliant

How ironic is it to see a bumper sticker that says 'Jesus is the answer' next to a bumper sticker supporting the war in Iraq, as if to says 'Jesus is the answer - but not in the real world. — Shane Claiborne

Together we will build an America where hope is a new job with a paycheck, not a faded word on an old bumper sticker. — Mitt Romney

I wanted to see if I could pick up some of those sticker badges you give out to kids. I like to give Jay a hard time about his little man-crush on you."
Her uncle's laugh filled his cramped office. "You're terrible, Vi. You act more like your aunt Kat every day. Has she been giving you lessons?" But he was already reaching into his desk drawer and pulling out a stack of the foil stickers. He slid them across the desk. "How's he ever gonna stop being so jumpy around me if you don't stop teasing him?"
This time Violet's smile was genuine. "Give him time, Uncle Stephen; he'll relax. He's just grateful, that's all. — Kimberly Derting

GOD GIVES US ONLY WHAT WE CAN HANDLE. APPARENTLY, GOD THINKS I'M A BADASS. - BUMPER STICKER — Darynda Jones

I can see a sticker on the back of that truck! Would you like me to tell you what it says? I just want to be normal again! Like you! — Michael Scott

Only a writer would slap a bumper sticker on her car that read, 'Seriously, I'd rather be working'. — Richelle E. Goodrich

The sticker has no meaning but exists only to cause people to react, to contemplate and search for meaning in the sticker, — Shepard Fairey

I've heard that before. Seen it on a bumper sticker. — Carolyn Spear

No one doubts that pure libertarianism is simple, but that's just why it remains on the ideological fringe - because it boils down the most difficult questions in human affairs to a simple equation, a What Would the Market Do bumper sticker. — Ross Douthat

You might be a redneck if your bumper sticker says, My other car is a combine. — Jeff Foxworthy

A Pennsylvania woman convicted for shoplifting was sentenced to wear a badge that reads "Convicted Shoplifter." However, her lawyers hope to plea bargain down to a bumper sticker reading "I'd Rather Be Stealing!. — Jimmy Fallon

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is NOT for you. (BUMPER STICKER) — Darynda Jones

Everyone's for a free Tibet, but no one's for freeing Tibet. So Tibet will stay unfree - as unfree now as it was when the first Free Tibet campaigner slapped the very first "FREE TIBET" sticker on the back of his Edsel. Idealism as inertia is the hallmark of the movement...He's [the guy with the bumper sticket] advertising his moral superiority, not calling for action. If Rumsfeld were to say, "Free Tibet? Jiminy, what a swell idea! The Third Infantry Division goes in on Thursday," the bumper-sticker crowd would be aghast. They'd have to bend down and peel off the "FREE TIBET" stickers and replace them with "WAR IS NOT THE ANSWER. — Mark Steyn

Here's a bumper sticker I'd like to see: We are the proud parents of a child who's self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn't need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car. — George Carlin

They both got in their cars. Myron watched Erik drive off. Then he picked up the cell phone and hit Win's speed dial. "Articulate." "I need you to break into a house." "Goody. Please explain." "I found a path where I dropped Aimee off. It leads to another cul-de-sac." "Ah. Do we have a thought then about where she ended up?" "Sixteen Fernlake Court." "You sound fairly certain." "There's a car in the driveway. On the back windshield is a sticker. It's for teacher parking at Livingston High School." "On my way. — Harlan Coben

If someone is being unkind or petty or jealous or distant or weird, you don't have to take it in. You don't have to turn it into a big psychodrama about your worth. That behavior so often is not even about you. It's about the person who's being unkind or petty or jealous or distant or weird. If this were summed up on a bumper sticker, it would say: Don't own other people's crap. The world would be a better place if we all did that. — Cheryl Strayed

If I had to sum up my philosophy of fuckness in a few words so I could cram it on a bumper sticker or t-shirt, those were the words I would have chosen: "Fuck it. — Andersen Prunty

Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you're an ASSHOLE. — Bumber Sticker

The basic idea that incentives can be used to motivate behavior is a powerful one. It works for employees, and it has a clear place in parenting, as anyone who has tried to potty-train a recalcitrant toddler with sticker rewards knows. — Emily Oster

I saw a great bumper sticker that read: 'Do something that scares you every day.' That really stuck with me. I try to live like that. — Janice Tanton

It's like a 'Fragile' sticker's on my forehead, and instead of taking a chance and saying something that might break me, they'd rather say nothing at all. But the silence is worst. — Angie Thomas

Once I found these sticker things for your nails - Sally Hansen - those were really fun to do. They're really fun to do when you're bored, and it's better than painting your nails because you don't mess up. It looks really good, very professional. I tried a zebra one that was really pretty, but I always get a little bored of it. — Gia Coppola

Biggest case we've had here in five years was when Dan Schwartz got drunk and shot up his own trailer, then he went on the run, down Main Street, in his wheelchair, waving this darn shotgun, shouting that he would shoot anyone that got in his way, that no one would stop him from getting to the interstate. I think he was on his way to Washington to shoot the president. I still laugh whenever I think of Dan heading down the interstate in that wheelchair of his with the bumper sticker on the back. My Juvenile Delinquent Is Screwing Your Honor Student. — Neil Gaiman

There was a car in front of me driving all conservatively, and then, lo and behold, I saw that he had a Romney bumper sticker. — Gregor Collins

When life hands you lemons say,
"Lemons? What else have you got?"
- bumper sticker — Darynda Jones

Myself, I have never seen a bumper sticker saying " Hate if you Love Jesus ", but I sometimes wonder why not. It would be a good slogan for the religious Right. — Simon Blackburn

generally we hid in corners, defying everyone with our independence and stuff. Like sharing our sticker books amongst ourselves only. (Those popular bitches never saw my Pegasus page, and it was EPIC.) — Felicia Day

Don't steal - the government hates competition!
— Ron Paul

Not bad," she finally said. "At least you left out the oh-my-God sauce this time."
"Made myself a batch with it," Shane said. "It's got the biohazard sticker on it in the fridge, so don't bitch if you get flamed. Where'd you pick up the stray?"
"Outside. She came to see the room."
"You beat her up first, just to make sure she's tough enough?"
"Bite me, chilli boy. — Rachel Caine

Much of John Kerry's recent surge has come at the expense of Howard Dean. The situation reflected in his hot new bumper sticker, 'Dated Dean, Married Kerry.' It's cute and a lot more tasteful than the alternative version, 'Dated Dean, Married Kerry, Finger-Banged Kucinich.' — Jon Stewart

IF IT HAS TIRES OR TESTICLES, IT'S GONNA GIVE YOU TROUBLE. - BUMPER STICKER — Darynda Jones

The car housed a hysterical bumper sticker: Save the Planet, and I permitted a moment of contemplation to truly bask in this thought. Save the planet? What a joke. Save the planet from what? From ourselves? And save it for what? For ourselves? It was a kind of perpetual stupidity in a tug-of-war battle over trivial matters. Only imbeciles see things in black and white: liberal or conservative, yes or no, this or that. Those in power laugh at those people in their morally inverted shades of grey, basking in the labels they've created so the people are easier to control. — Bruce Crown

Guess what? Faisal Shahzad is a registered Democrat. I wonder if his SUV had an Obama sticker on it. — Rush Limbaugh

Ever seen that bumper sticker "He who dies with the most toys wins"? Millions of people act as if it were true. The more accurate saying is "He who dies with the most toys still dies - and never takes his toys with him." When we die after devoting our lives to acquiring things, we don't win - we lose. We move into eternity, but our toys stay behind, filling junkyards. The bumper sticker couldn't be more wrong. — Randy Alcorn

November 4, 1987 Chicago I saw a bumper sticker the other day that read I LOVE KILLING COMMUNISTS. The word love was replaced by a heart shape I'm guessing they'll put on the typewriter keyboard any day now, right beside the exclamation point. The bumper sticker was on a Ford Fairlane on Montrose Avenue. — David Sedaris

I hold the door to the post office open for a weathered man in a wheelchair. He is gracious, thanking me. One leg is missing, and just as I notice this, I see the sticker on the back of his chair: VIETNAM VETS.

My thoughts jumble as an ache brews in my heart. I think of war and how it destroys, divides, and damages. I see the faces of those in the refugee camp and those who found their names on The List and are now in America. I want to tell this wounded soldier that I am sorry for his loss and for the abandonment he may have felt upon his return. I want to say other things, but right now I'm just honored to hold the door for him. — Alice J. Wisler

I read with keen interest the words of a bumper sticker readily visible on the highly polished chrome bumper of a car which was weaving in and out of the traffic stream. The words were these: "Honk if you love Jesus." No one honked. Perhaps each was disturbed by the thoughtless and rude actions of the offending driver. Then, again, would honking be an appropriate manner in which to show one's love for the Son of God, the Savior of the world, the Redeemer of all mankind? Such was not the pattern provided by Jesus of Nazareth. — Thomas S. Monson

In 30 years Christians will have baptized their picture of Christ. He won't be a nice, banal, meek, and bearded man with softly permed hair. Instead, he will fill our imaginations more solidly, more invasively , more unexpectedly. Christ will become That Man who changes people, someone who jumps off a bumper sticker and mediocre praise songs and into lives. — Jonalyn Fincher

President Obama's version of America is a divided one - pitting us against each other based on our income level, gender, and social status. His policies have failed! We are not better off than we were 4 years ago, and no rhetoric, bumper sticker, or campaign ad can change that. — Mia Love

One has to live with the ignominy of a garish sticker slapped over one's face, proclaiming '? — Michael Heseltine

A great principle of moral advancement, on par with "Love thy neighbor" and "All men are created equal," is the one on the bumper sticker: "Shit happens. — Steven Pinker

For once Yancy didn't mind driving to Miami. Dr. Rosa Campesino had agreed to meet for lunch. On the Eighteen-Mile Stretch he got stuck behind a minivan with a CHOOSE LIFE bumper sticker. "Choose the accelerator! How's that for starters?" Yancy was shouting, pounding on the horn. — Carl Hiaasen

I have sometimes been sad that Tennessee Williams wrote that line for Blanche DuBois, "I have always depended on the kindness of strangers." Many of us have been saved many times by the kindness of strangers, but after a while it sounds trite, like a bumper sticker. And that's what makes me sad, that a beautiful and true line comes to be used so often that it takes on the superficial sound of a bumper sticker. — Elizabeth Strout

I resent the fact that a parental warning sticker has to be included on an album as cover art. To me that's censorship. — Jeff Buckley

Old or new, the only sign I always try to rid my books of (usually with little success) is the price-sticker that malignant booksellers attach to the backs. These evil white scabs rip off with difficulty, leaving leprous wounds and traces of slime to which adhere the dust and fluff of ages, making me wish for a special gummy hell to which the inventor of these stickers would be condemned. — Alberto Manguel

Sejal had not thought of her home, or of India as a whole, as cool. She was dimly aware, however, of a white Westerner habit of wearing other cultures like T-shirts - the sticker bindis on club kids, sindoor in the hair of an unmarried pop star, Hindi characters inked carelessly on tight tank tops and pale flesh. She knew Americans liked to flash a little Indian or Japanese or African. They were always looking for a little pepper to put in their dish. — Adam Rex

I know, I say, after he says, This is hard, for the third time. This is what happens when you have a TRM, I tell him. You make a mess. It's okay. You just have to try harder next time.
I am trying hard, Dad says.
I know. You get a sticker.
Thank you.
Okay. You get another sticker for being polite. — Kathryn Erskine

I am not sleeping with him." I shot him a poisonous glare. "If I had a bumper sticker, it would read, 'Demon slayer, not demon layer.' " "Your mouth says no, but your cleavage says yes. — Rob Thurman

Crystal then read the red sticker out loud, "Dangerous, do not open." We both stared at each other for a moment. I was trying to figure out why a dumb book about power was dangerous — Dominic Tomasi

There is no path I follow. I feel as if I'm just drifting along, because although I can progress physically, through my training, mentally and spiritually I don't know what the hell I'm doing. It's like that car sticker: 'Don't follow me, I'm lost'. — Steve Ovett

The library, I believe, is the last of our public institutions to which you can go without credentials. You don't even need the sticker on your windshield that you need to get into the public beach. All you need is the willingness to read. — Harry Golden

Sitting on my stool I thought of a bumper sticker: If Mean People Suck, Why Isn't My Dick In Your Mouth? — Paul Neilan

You want to know whether we're better off? I've got a little bumper sticker for you: Osama bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive. Osama bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive! Osama bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive! — Joe Biden

But not every dog was Boo Radley. Sometimes a dog was just a dog. Sometimes a cat was just a cat. Still, I opened the screen door and stuck a red sticker on Lucille's head. — Kami Garcia

You don't put bumper stickers on a Bentley. — Kim Kardashian

If someone wants to sticker a record for whatever reason, that's fine. But once it affects someone's opportunity to, you know, get that record, then I have a problem with it. — Scott Ian

Everything will be okay. I have a sticker on my laptop that says that. — Sharon Van Etten

The LIFE FROM GOD posture is so appealing because it doesn't ask us to change. What we desire, what we seek, what we do, and how we live - all shaped by consumerism - are not disrupted. Our values and way of life are simply projected onto God and incorporated into a religious system in which we receive divine assistance to meet our desires. In this way LIFE FROM GOD is nothing more than consumerism with a Jesus sticker slapped on the bumper. — Skye Jethani

Heracles was strangely silent. What is he thinking? / Geryon wondered. / Geryon watched prehistoric rocks move past the car and thought about thoughts. / Even when they were lovers / he had never known what Herakles was thinking. Once in a while he would say, / Penny for your thoughts! / and it always turned out to be some odd thing like a bumper sticker or a dish / he'd eaten in a Chinese restaurant years ago. / What Geryon was thinking Herakles never asked. In the space between them / developed a dangerous cloud. — Anne Carson

I have a bumper sticker that Bowen created that says Regardless of my kids grades, they have an 'A' in my book'. Without play the child that still lives in all of us will always be incomplete. And not only physically, but creatively, intellectually, and spiritually as well. — George A. Sheehan

The strongest language to be found in The God Delusion is tame and measured by comparison. If it sounds intemperate, it is only because of the weird convention, almost universally accepted (see the quotation from Douglas Adams here), that religious faith is uniquely privileged: above and beyond criticism. Insulting a restaurant might seem trivial compared to insulting God. But restaurateurs and chefs really exist and they have feelings to be hurt, whereas blasphemy, as the witty bumper sticker puts it, is a victimless crime. — Richard Dawkins

I see the whole field of environmentalis m and population as nothing more
than the survival of the human species. I have wanted to have some bumper
sticker made up saying 'Save the Humans'. At the bottom of it all, we are
trying to save ourselves. — Ted Turner

Genius has its limitations.
Insanity ... not so much -Bumper Sticker — Darynda Jones

I like wearing good clothes. Some of my friends who are into making clothes told me since I was already playing with my own brand of bat sticker, I should make a foray in fashion. The idea has worked very well. — Harbhajan Singh

It is obvious that the bumper sticker question "What would Jesus do?" will not always bring a popular response. — Jeffrey R. Holland

One final thought. In the years leading up to my trial, whenever I was caught in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the highway leading to my cottage, creeping along behind a battered, rust eaten pick-up truck with a sticker on its rear bumper that read JESUS SAVES, I used to think don't count on it, buster. Now I am no longer sure. — Mordecai Richler

A popular bumper sticker post-9/11, and pretty faded these days, proclaims drivers of the cars to be 'Proud to be an American.' It really should say 'Lucky to be an American,' for I doubt very much that the drivers had much say in having been born here, and are not old enough to have participated in the drafting of the Constitution. — Hooman Majd