Quotes & Sayings About Snarky

As a parent, I want my kids to have an optimistic outlook, and one that has hope, and that makes sense, where good does triumph over evil and it's not cynical, and it's not snarky. — Dee Bradley Baker

Ryker, you ride with Orlando," Ryker mocked in a snarky voice as he turned to the other man. He gestured toward the Pinto with a look of revulsion on his rugged face. "How the hell does he expect both of us to fit into that tiny metal trap? Even if we could squeeze in, the tires will probably pop. In fact, let's just carry it over. It'll be faster that way. — Rose Wynters

I'm Prophet."
"Seriously?"
"Why? What's your name
Jesus? — S.E. Jakes

You like my forearms?
No, not yours in particular. I mean, they're fine. Just, it's a sexy body part.
I totally agree. I just didn't know girls liked them too.
Oh, yes, Daniel. All girls like forearms. Every single one. No really, I've asked all of us and we all agree. We don't even agree about whether or not the long arm of the law should be able to reach into our vaginas, but we agree about forearms. — Roan Parrish

Stuart, who had just witnessed me go through an entire rainbow of emotions and experiences. There was parents-have-just-been-jailed me, stuck-in-a-strange-town me, insane-and-can't-shut-up me, kind-of-snarky-to-the-strange-guy-trying-to-be-helpful me, breakup me, and the extremely popular jump-on-top-of-you-unexpectedly me. — Maureen Johnson

Sometimes I used to think to myself, 'Have I lost a sense of humor?' but I don't think that I have. I think one can be as snarky and sarcastic as lots of people, but I have never found that it makes me particularly happy. — Kenneth Branagh

The words were quintessential snarky Sidney Sinclair, but the husky tone of her voice was
something new. Something that drew him in even more. "I think you're worried that if I kiss you right
now, you might actually like it."
Her eyes flashed - with anger, no doubt, but also with a heat that came from somewhere else.
And before Vaughn even thought about what he was doing, he kissed her. — Julie James

No. N-O. It might be an unfamiliar word to you, so look it up. It comes after M--and right before I go get my sword.
--Sera — Ella Summers

Clearing his throat, he rumbled, "Miss Darling, a word if you please."
"Sesquipedalian," she said, keeping her back towards him.
The strange response momentarily stunned him. "Pardon?"
Turning around, she leaned against the counter and grinned at him, "You asked for a word and I gave you one. It means 'many syllabled' and while it's exceedingly pretentious it is a lot of fun to say. Sesquipedalian; it tangles up the tongue and then just falls right off.
"Or perhaps you would prefer a different word?" she continued guilelessly and he was completely charmed by her. "Tittle, which is the little dot over i's and j's; or Ornithopter, an aircraft that flies by flapping its wings; Tuatha De Danan Lora or Expector Patronum?"
"Now you're just making words up," he grinned, and realized he had missed talking to her. — A.C. Warneke

What are you running from?"
That put a damper on the fluttering lashes. "Columbia House Music Club," I said, recovering my snarkiness quickly. "Oh, sure, they say they'll sell you six CDs for a penny, but they'll hunt you down like the hounds of hell if you miss the payments. — Molly Harper

So when I hear this snarky question (and I hear it everywhere): Are librarians obsolete in the Age of Google? all I can say is, are you kidding? Librarians are more important than ever. Google and Yahoo! and Bing and WolframAlpha can help you find answers to your questions, sometimes brilliantly; but if you don't know how to phrase those questions, no search engine can help provide the answers. — Marilyn Johnson

Snarky Snarkerson! — Christopher Rice

Why don't you wear those tiny shorts when you run, like they do in the movies?" His voice was low and sexy, and he knew it.
"Because I'm not in a movie. I know it's confusing, since you obviously live 'The Saxon Show' day and night, but some of us want to live a boring, old, normal high school life, you know? — Liz Reinhardt

I know I'm asking a lot. You'd need to start talking, stop growling, and bathe. No offense meant, but you look like a crazy man the way you are. — Melissa Haag

I may act like a snarky bitch at times, but that's mostly a front for the scared, shy girl who's hiding behind her. — L. H. Cosway

Can I take the cap and gown off now? I feel kind of dorky. You look kind of dorky ... my subconscious is at her snarky best. So are you going to introduce Ray to the man you're f**king? She is glaring at me over her wing-shaped spectacles. He'd be so proud. — E.L. James

If all the world's a stage, then it's missing a few planks. — John Fogarty

This was Jace being brave. Simon thought, brave and snarky because he thought Lilith was going to kill him, and that was the way he wanted to go, unafraid and on his feet. Like a warrior. The way Shadowhunters did. His death song would always be this-jokes and snideness and pretend arrogance, and that look in his eyes that said 'I'm better than you'. Simon just hadn't realized it before. — Cassandra Clare

My heavily-cleverly disguised low self-regard manifested itself in my constant showing off, my addiction for publicity, and my intolerable 'me-me-me' attitudes and actions. But it's done, isn't it? And no one can really change, can they? And, hey, it has been a lot of fun being the life-long irresponsible, snarky, nasty art scamp. — Thomas Hoving

You don't feel like a stranger to me. I wanted to ask her, What does a stranger feel like? Not to be snarky or sarcastic. Because I really wanted to know if there was a difference, if there was a way to become truly knowable, if there wasn't always something keeping you a stranger, even to the people you weren't strange to at all. I — Rachel Cohn

'Mike & Molly' exists in a world where we don't just say a snarky line, make a crazy face, and walk out of the room. There's actually some tender moments here, too. — Billy Gardell

Gripping his hand, she shook. "The name's Neve, not damsel in distress. — Katherine McIntyre

Why did Nicky call me the Baby Killer?" Kiara sniffled.
"Because she is a bitch," Leontes said.
Jaeger gave him a chastising look. "She's dead."
"Dying did not make her any less of a bitch," Leontes replied. — A&E Kirk

I'm not as snarky as I used to be. — Stacy London

A man came up to me at a party and asked if I wanted to be in his video game. I of course said yes. And then it turned out it was 'Assassin's Creed', so that was great. They let me ad lib a lot and mess about and be very snarky indeed, and I'm thrilled by the success of all their hard work. — Danny Wallace

I pretty much stay true to myself and try to find the good in people and not be snarky. — Tim Gunn

What a snarky jerk. (Obviously, I later slept with him.) — Lena Dunham

That's about as effective as a windshield wiper on a goat's ass. — Denise Tompkins

I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks. 'We spent one night together.'
'You had sex then?'
'No we crocheted a quilt.' I cocked my head to side and gave him my nastiest glare. Lorelei Preston to Agent Brody-The Wild Hunt — Ashley Jeffery

The press always ends up being much nicer than I expect. A lot of times they say something snarky about you, but then you meet them in person and they couldn't be nicer. — Josh Schwartz

Trying to teach creativity is the major hoax of our time along with the Iraq war and plastic surgery"
~ Snarky comment of Clive from "The River Swimmer" (pg 47) — Jim Harrison

It's your birthright to be snarky. Own it. Live it. Rejoice in it. — Lauren Myracle

Who knew Demon Child would have such a normal name? I expected something exotic like Serena or Destiny or the Evil One That Comes in the Night to Make Us Chilly. — Darynda Jones

That's not how I'd planned it to be."
"How did you plan it to be?" I ask, not to be snarky but because I am genuinely curious.
"I planned it to be a million different things," he replies. "And in the end, I couldn't figure which one it should be. — David Levithan

Yeah, cause that would be a smart choice. So, I should just forget about the whole lying to me thing when you pronounce you will never do it again?"
"Yes."
"You'd have a better chance getting a donkey to shit gold. — Elizabeth J. Kolodziej

He smirked and sat up "Simmer down, Jelly Bean. — Stacey O'Neale

It's tempting to just write a comic called 'Everyone Mail Randall Munroe Twenty Bucks' - maybe it would work, and I could just close down the 'xkcd' store and sit on a beach and draw pictures and make snarky Reddit posts for the rest of my life. — Randall Munroe

For a woman to be taken as seriously as a man she must be three times as effective. Happily, this is not difficult.
Simone de Beauvoir — Gale Martin

It's been a tough couple of years for condescending nerds. And if bookstores fall, Jon, America will be inundated with a wandering, snarky underclass of unemployable purveyors of useless and arcane esoterica. — John Hodgman

I wasn't giving this guy an inch. He disturbed me. I didn't like things that disturbed me, which is why I was licensed to shoot most things that disturbed me. Unfortunately, humans were not on the list and sexual attraction was not considered a valid reason to shoot someone. — Angelia Sparrow

Rachael stared back at Olivia, discomfort shifting in her bones. The alpha's eyes raked over her, until Rachael realized she was staring at her shirt. Namely, that it was obviously Aaron's.

Shit.

"Lovely outfit," said Olivia with too much calm. "I've wondered why I never see you outside."

Now was the time for a perfect snarky comeback. But while Rachael was far better at those than she had been in high school, at the moment she drew a blank.

Instead she glanced at Aaron and said, "You pay her rent?"

"It seemed the thing to do, although I am seriously reconsidering it," muttered Aaron. — Deidre Huesmann

Bianca swallowed past the biter chunks of broken heart clogging her throat. "I'm not going to kill him."
From her listening post, Vivi shot her a wicked grin. "Would have been my first plan of action."
"Whacking someone is always your first idea," Lexie said, her laptop screen giving her green highlights an otherworldly glow.
"True." Vivi shrugged her deceptively small shoulders, a snarky grin curling her blood-red lips. "That's what makes me so damn charming. — Avery Flynn

If I were a snarky Reddit user though, I would say, hypothetically, that that would just be like reading Reddit's Front Page a day later. But I'm not going to go there. — Alexis Ohanian

But most of the time when I wear them, I don't know, I'm kind of hoping - foolishly, probably - that people will read it, get the message, change their lives for the better, even if it's only in the smallest of ways, and make the world a better place." Knox was still grinning as he buttered his toast. "So you're saying your shirts are like a butterfly effect?" "Pretty much, yeah. And when they hand me my Nobel Peace Prize in fifty years for changing the world, one snarky shirt at a time, I'm going to wave it in your face and chant 'Told ya so' about a million times. — Nicole Williams

I think no matter how snarky you try to be, poetry will always find a way to make a spiritual goal out of what you're doing. — Mike Young

Is talking the only thing you can do with your mouth?"
Seven flicked a look up. "No."
"Good. — Adrienne Wilder

Snarky, sexy and so much fun. Sugar Jamison is sure to be a hit!. — Kristan Higgins

You took so long I got bored." She widened her smile, teeth showing. "Next time freshen up quicker, princess. — Katherine McIntyre

The newly developed snarky side of my personality wanted to tell him 'There's no crying in vamp battles. — Robyn Jones

A snarky but accurate description of monetary policy over the past five years is that the Federal Reserve successfully replaced the technology bubble with a housing bubble — Paul Krugman

Put it out," said Dimitri. "Put it out or she dies."
Lissa finally found her voice, even with her air cut off. "Don't listen to him," she gasped out." He's going to kill us anyway."
But behind her, the heat died out. Shadows fell across Dimitri's face once again. Christian wouldn't risk her, even though she was right. It hardly seemed to matter.
"Actually," said Dimitri, voice peasant amid and grim scene, "I'd rather you two stay alive. At least for a little while longer."
I felt Lissa's face move to a frown. I wouldn't have been surprised if Christian's did too, judging from the confusion in his voice. He couldn't even manage a snarky comment. He could only ask the obvious: "Why?"
Dimitri's eyes gleamed. "Because I need you to be bait for Rose. — Richelle Mead

I think the things that are more painful to me are not the intrusion of paparazzi, it's the lack of civility that I find more intimidating and far more painful an experience. It's the lack of critical thinking. It's the endless snarky, mean way we talk about each other, we approach each other. The anonymity of being cruel, the delight in tearing people down. The tabloid era that we find ourselves in is a cultural boneyard, and that is painful to me. — Sarah Jessica Parker

I can be a snarky Asshole, or I can be sort of mentally impaired. It's very hard for me to just be normal human being. — Michael Ian Black

He was my age and in my imagination he was a fireman, not the kind that actually fights fires but the kind who travels the country shirtless posing for calendars. — Marika Christian

The La Brea Tar Pits of asshole-ism." Noah pressed his lips into a thin line and gave a mock sympathetic nod. "They claim many each year. — Stacey Rourke

You should just keep your mouth shout! It gets very tedious having you make a snarky comment about everything that someone says in this group. — Jojo Moyes

I followed her to the library, feeling like Princess Leia. Instead of Obi-Wan, this snarky girl was my only hope. — D.R. Perry

Being snarky and smug doesn't equate to providing insight, and there's more than one occasion when the filmmakers lose sight of this in their zeal to spread the Gospel According to Maher. — James Berardinelli

I glare at him."I can't reach my hair," I snap, wiggling my bound fingers.
Bowen's eyebrows shoot up."A bit snarky this morning, Fotard?"
I sigh, a feeling bone-deep, weary ache in my whole body." Can you blame me, Botard?"
He runs his fingers over his scruffy chin and studies me."No. I'd be pretty snarky if I smelled like you. And I bet you're dying to brush your teeth. — Bethany Wiggins

Our witness is only as strong as our freedom is real. We can have the most noble convictions in the world, but if we are snarky and impatient when we don't get our way, those things will interfere with our influence. If we gossip more than we pray, those misspoken words will demolish our influence. If our addictions get in the way of living out our convictions, we'll have mostly a negative influence. — Susie Larson

The thing about youthful offenders is that no one seems to care about them. Most people don't like adolescents - even the good ones can be snarky and unpleasant. Combine the antipathy we feel toward the average teenager with the fear inspired by youth violence, and you have a population that no one wants to deal with. — Ayelet Waldman

I have nothing snarky to say about Joan Rivers' appearance. We should all be that happy with how we look on camera, frankly. — Julie Klausner

I gotta say, I was really feeling the robe, but there's something about a girl in cartoon pajamas that does it for me. — Stacey O'Neale

A lot of people have said that I'm super-snarky and mean. But honesty is the only way to get people to change. It's very important to be constructively critical - give people alternatives and you're giving them a new way to see themselves. — Stacy London

If I see my films described as 'quirky' or, even worse, 'snarky' one more time, I'm going to probably seriously consider an early retirement. All these years, I've labored under the conceit that they were darkly humorous.' — Terry Zwigoff

Have you been smoking something? Seriously, I think you're a werewolf. This new snarky attitude is a dead giveaway."
"And vampires aren't snarky?" Kylie rolled her eyes.
"No, we're pissy. Snarky and pissy are two totally different things. — C.C. Hunter

There were so many ways he could have answered her snarky question. But sometimes, direct worked best. Leaning forward, he hooked a finger in the waistband of her pants and tugged. She stepped forward without hesitation and met his mouth hungrily.
Well, hello.
[ ... ]
She wound her hands into his hair, arching against him so that her thighs pressed against his. With the added height from her heels, everything lined up perfectly. Center to center, mouth to mouth, heart to heart. — Cari Quinn

She says, "I'll swear by the rose tattooed on my ass, that old man raped me."
Here, the funeral parade stops. At this point, Comrade Snarky is a victim among victims. The rest of us - just her supporting cast.
Mrs. Clark, leading us, she looks back and says, "He what?"
And from behind his camera, Agent Tattletale says, "Me, too. He raped me first."
Saint Gut-Free says, "Well what the hell ... He poked me, too."
As if poor skinny Saint Gut-Free had enough ass left to poke.
And Mrs. Clark says, "This is not funny. Not in the least."
"Tough," the Matchmaker tells her. "It's wasn't funny, either, when you raped me."
Shaking his ponytail, the Duke of Vandals tells the Matchmaker, "You couldn't pay to get raped. — Chuck Palahniuk

He auditioned with Lily, and he and Lily had incredible chemistry that sort of blazed off the scene. I'm just sitting here watching this on my computer, and you know, he was not the only person they've ever sent me to look at. I've gotten lots of headshots and this and that, and I'm watching the audition and I literally started crying because that was my Jace and Clary on the screen. And it's an incredible feeling to see that even as an audition. This is amazing. He was snarky funny where he needed to be snarky funny, and he was badass where he needed to be badass. And he and Lily were incredible together — Cassandra Clare

I think that we live in a time where it's easier to be suspicious of dedicated men and women, people dedicated to their craft, because the world around them inspires them to be lazy. It inspires them to be negative. It inspires them to be snarky. — Ryan Adams

This was the first time since I'd started
working there that I hadn't received a look of all-out disgust or, at the very least, a snarky
comment, and all it had taken was a SWAT team of New York fashion editors, a
collection of Parisian hair and makeup stylists, and a hefty selection of the world's finest
and most expensive clothing. — Lauren Weisberger

3. When making your dramatic exit, crawl along one of the web strands that extend outward from the center. Avoid the webbing that runs in concentric circles, as it's the stickiest.
4. Once you've escaped, say something snarky to the queen, like "Sorry I couldn't stick around. — Andrew Shaffer

More often than not he wore jeans with at least half a dozen holes, flip-flops that made him look like he was heading to the beach and a T-shirt, usually with a snarky saying. Today's offering was Heavily armed, easily pissed. — Maya Banks

At least Anne Frank," Comrade Snarky said, "never had to tour with her book ... — Chuck Palahniuk

You catch more flies with honey, ever heard of that?" He shrugged. "I don't like flies. They're annoying." He grinned "I'd rather catch hell. — Heather Hildenbrand

At the last moment, Kellan swerved around him, quickly leaving the zombie behind.
"Why didn't you just hit him?" Jayden asked, turning to look behind us as we sped away. I did, too. The zombie spun around as he immediately started to follow us.
"I didn't want to mess up my paint job," Kellan sarcastically replied as he turned on the street that would lead us to the store. "Plus, I just washed it. — Rose Wynters

'Be nice' is my family's basic rule but one that often goes unfollowed in Hollywood. There's always a moment when you can choose between being snarky and being kind. I opt for the latter - it's much less exhausting! — Jenji Kohan

Becoming a fae leader? Not on my bucket list. — E.J. Stevens

Now when you say staring, are you including yourself in this assessment? I recall you taking in the view on several occasions."

"For the last time, I was not staring at you." I was a terrible liar. "Now, if you're done, I'd like to finish asking my question. — Stacey O'Neale

Most of the writers in TV are from L.A. or New York, and those are places where people are cynical and snarky. And they fly from L.A. to New York in an airplane over this vast, expansive land where people aren't snarky; they're a lot more like the 'Parks and Rec' characters. — Chris Pratt

I think the way to be an influential journalist is to be accurate and to be fair and to get things right and to really characterize things in an honest way, versus being really snarky or cheerleading. — Kara Swisher

Elinor had some difficulty here to refrain from observing, that she thought Fanny might have borne with composure, an acquisition of wealth to her brother, by which neither she nor her child could be possibly impoverished. — Jane Austen

When young people are cynical, and snarky, they shoot down their own future. When you keep saying "No," all that's left is what other people said "Yes" to before you were born. Really, "No" is no choice at all. — Caitlin Moran

Let me guess," the frog interrupted,"Like every other human explored I've even met, you want to know the meaning of life."
"I didn't-"
"The answer's forty-four. The machine was off by two" the frog snapped, "Believe me, it makes a world of difference... — Nnedi Okorafor-Mbachu

Don't slag off other creators or companies. We'll cheerfully mock dumb politicians on Twitter, but we try to never slam another creator's work or make fun of another company's projects or initiatives. First, because life's too short. We'd rather use that time to celebrate the fantastic work of colleagues and friends. Second, because it's a small world, and people have long memories. A few snarky words today can ruin a chance for an incredibly rewarding creative partnership tomorrow. — Greg Pak

'Mad Men' doesn't capture one single thing about the decor, costumes, or sexual interaction. It is a total projection of contemporary snarky attitudes into the past. — Camille Paglia

You're just jealous."
"Hardly. Been there, done you. Adequate, but unremarkable. — Jennifer Estep

I consider myself a product of Alaska. The love and the debt that I feel to my home state - you always want your hometown to be the proudest of you, and so it's heartbreaking to hear people say snarky things. — Jewel

As the heated debate continues, it will be important that nonproliferation experts play a critical role in the discourse. Science-based statements, not snarky sound bites, should be the weapons of choice. — David Corn

I am fluent in snark.
Bethany only notices snark when snark grabs her off the sidewalk, throws her in the back of a sketchy van with tinted windows, drives to the middle
of the Meadow-lands in the dead of night, and uses a heavy blunt instrument
to smack her repeatedly about the head as it screams, "I'M SNARK. DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME? I'M SNARKY SNARKY SNARK!" And even then she's like, "Ohhhh? Snark? Is that you? — Megan McCafferty

Some people carry their life in a glass of water and splash it on everyone they meet. — Robert Lane

Who are you after?"
"The snarky asshole one."
"Could you be a little more specific."
"The one who has a staff and throws their toys out of the pram that one."
"Ooh."
"Yeah. — Charon Lloyd-Roberts

He never should have left the island. He'd been there with Diana and Penny. He could have tossed Penny off a cliff and been fine on the island. Decent food, a beautiful mansion, electricity, and a soft bed with Diana in it.
What had he been thinking, leaving the island?
He missed Diana busting him. He missed her snarky voice. He missed her eye rolls and that skeptical look she had where she'd half close her eyes and look at him like he was too dumb to merit her full attention. He'd have killed, or at least injured, anyone else who treated him like that. But she wasn't anyone else.
He missed her hair. Her neck. Her breasts.
She understood him. She loved him, in her own way. And if he had listened to her, he'd still be on the island. Somehow he would have found some fuel to keep the lights on there. Probably. And the food would have run out and then they'd have starved, but hey, this was the FAYZ, where all you could really hope to do was delay the pain. — Michael Grant

At the risk of hurting your feelings, I think you should know that some kisses are more special than others. — Jessica Steele

The trouble with today's snarky pipsqueaks who break off a sentence or two, or who write a couple of mean paragraphs, is that they don't go far enough; they don't have a coherent view of life. Spinning around in the media from moment to moment, they don't stand for anything, push for anything; they're mere opportunists without dedication, and they don't win any victories. — David Denby

Why are you here?" I wanted to give him a snarky answer to compete with his responses. Something like, I wanted to eat stolen apples and read books all weekend. But I held my tongue. Maybe if he learned more about me, he'd realize I just wanted to leave. — Kasie West

Listen up, Little Miss Fun Hater. Off the record, if it wasn't for our school's strict but smarmy anti-bullying laws, I would bitch-slap you into next summer. — G.G. Silverman

Can a Filipina be depicted as smart without having to shout all the time? Or down-to-earth and honest without having to start every sentence with a snarky 'Hay nako' or 'Alam mo bah'? — Arnold Arre

My inner goddess confirms that staring at a beautiful/rich/powerful face is the basis of True Love. — Jess C. Scott

I just feel like people like a little break. Especially at 12:37 at night, you go, like, 'I'm just tired of the snarky right now. I just want to lie down and have somebody make me laugh for an hour. Entertain me, and then I'm going to sleep with a smile on my face.' That's my job; that's what I do. — Jimmy Fallon