Quotes & Sayings About Peeing Yourself

There is a small, but important, difference between peeing in the pool, and peeing into the pool. — Demetri Martin

Why do organizations need to mark everything with their insignia? It's like a dog peeing on every tree. Google is the same way. So was NewBagel. Using — Robin Sloan

so entering a conversation that you'd overheard but hadn't been invited to join was sort of like peeing in someone's coffee while they stood there and watched you do it. — Johnny B. Truant

I only wanted Uncle Vernon standing by his own car (a Hudson) on a clear day, I got him and the car. Ialso got a bit of Aunt Mary's laundry and Beau Jack, the dog, peeing on the fence, and a row of potted tuberous begonias on the porch and 78 trees and a million pebbles in the driveway and more. It's a generous medium, photography. — Lee Friedlander

Well, there's two kinds of peeing ... There's regular peeing, because you have to pee. And then there's auxiliary competitive peeing. For acquiring empire. I'm all about the real estate. — Merrill Markoe

never seen real darkness, not in the city, but how, if you stood peeing off the cabin porch on a moonless night, or took a walk through the woods where the treetops stitched out the stars, you could almost forget you were there, you felt invisible. Country dark, his mother called it. — Tom Franklin

It's so scary. And then I end up getting so nervous that I get like [I am] now. I get really hyper. [Squeals.] So then I go in interviews and I'm like, 'I'm like a chihuahua! I'm shaking and peeing!' And then afterwards, I'm like, 'I just talked about peeing on the red carpet.' — Jennifer Lawrence

Come on. Let's go to Cafe Bella and drink so many lattes we're peeing coffee for a week. — Gena Showalter

I had definitely never heard of anyone peeing in a cup and leaving it in their own office on a bookshelf to evaporate and be absorbed back into their body through the pores on their face. — Tina Fey

The aunts' conception of the right to privacy went far enough to allow you to close the toilet door when you were peeing, but no further. — Zen Cho

You can watch me pee! It's okay! Here look, I'm peeing! I'm peeing! You can stop uprooting yourself. — Elle Casey

That was just too embarrassing, although there was a sort of poetic justice to peeing on your enemies when they weren't able to get to you. And it wasn't like they would kill me less painfully if I didn't pee on them. — Elle Casey

I saw a bear once. I was peeing then, too. — Kirsty McKay

Why is it that we want so badly to memorialise ourselves? Even while we're still alive. we wish to assert our existence, like dogs peeing on fire hydrants. we put on display our framed photographs, our parchment diplomas, our silver-plated cups; we monogram our linen, we carve our names on trees, we scrawl them on washroom walls. It's all the same impulse. what do we hope from it? Applause, envy, respect? Or simply attention, of any kind we can get? At the very least we want a witness. we can't stand the idea of our own voices falling silent finally, like a radio turning down. — Margaret Atwood

Do you want to know why I don't like the so-called connoisseurs of arts? I hate hypocrisy. I'll give you an example: if the movie is colored and tells us about two friends who sit in the pool, fart into the water, get out of the pool and fart into each other's face it will be thrash, a lack of a culture and a third-rate comedy. But if the movie is black-and-white and tells us about two friends who cross the desert and peeing on each other, shit on the sand, and then they eat each other's shit, and on top of that they fucking each other's ass it will be a brilliant art house movie. — Ilze Falb

She smiled thoughtfully. "I think Jackson was like a lost puppy. He needed purpose, someone to believe in him and love him despite his bullshit. But he didn't have that, so he just went around humping everyone's leg and peeing everywhere. Then you came along and he thought he found that owner that would give him that purpose - something that would make him feel needed - but you chose the fancy pet store puppy instead, so he went back to peeing on everything and destroying all the furniture."
"Um, Whit ... is there a point to this?"
"We all need someone to believe in us. It helps us see our full potential. You were that someone to believe in him. I think he'll be a new man because of it."
"So you're saying I rescued a lost puppy, and now he'll become a topnotch show dog because I'm just so amazing?"
"Exactly."
"You have such an eloquent way with words."
"No shit, right?"
"Precisely."
-Emma and Whitney — Rachael Wade

2387. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? (My sentiments exactly!) — Olav Laudy

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. — Kendare Blake

MOM - noun - One who sacrifices her body, sleep, social life, spending money, eating hot meals, peeing alone, patience, memory, energy and sanity for LOVE! — Tanya Masse

Caia sighed. If this guy knew that he was in a room of lykans, two of which who looked as if they could happily rip him apart, the cockiness would soon dissolve and the peeing of the pants would commence. — Samantha Young

Essentially, the whole time I'd been here, the security staff hadn't been paid. I would have been harassing the management too, though I probably would have started with a discussion and not so much jumping straight to peeing on someone's bed. You have to work up to that sort of thing. Still, I had essentially staged a hostile takeover, which did kind of explain why they'd been going on the offensive. — Lish McBride

Killing demons is like peeing on yourself; everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. Annr, guard, Zearlach city. — Taylor Grace

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. — Robert Bloch

That reminds me. Make sure you drink a lot of water while you're there, or you'll dehydrate fast. And if you find yourself not peeing, or your urine is dark in color, you're not drinking enough.
The last thing in the world she'd ever wanted to discuss with Zane Alexander was the color of her pee. — Cat Johnson

My mind, my logical, practical, reasoning mind, is peeing in his mind pants. — Orson Scott Card

Bucks, doe - thank God everything boils down to money, I always say."
"During mating season the doe constructs a bed for herself, and then she urinates all around the outside of it. That's how she gets her mate."
"So that's it," murmured Odette. "I was always peeing in the bed. — Lorrie Moore

He read me another poem, and another one - and he explained the true history of poetry, which is a kind of secret, a magic known only to wise men. Mr. Premier, I won't be saying anything new if I say that the history of the world is the history of a ten-thousand-year war of brains between the rich and the poor. Each side is eternally trying to hoodwink the other side: and it has been this way since the start of time. The poor win a few battles (the peeing in the potted plants, the kicking of the pet dogs, etc.) but of course the rich have won the war for ten thousand years. That's why, on day, some wise men, out of compassion for the poor, left them signs and symbols in poems, which appear to be about roses and pretty girls and things like that, but when understood correctly spill out secrets that allow the poorest man on earth to conclude the ten-thousand-year-old brain-war on terms favorable to himself. — Aravind Adiga

Obnoxious smart-ass. Never been anywhere, never done anything, huh. Arrested development, huh. Considering that it was coming from a man who spent his nights peeing on his neighbors' fences, that was rich. Shoot, I should've told him that. — Ilona Andrews

The Congressional Record will forever show that [Obamacare] was passed in a romper room of overgrown children seemingly barely old enough to keep from peeing on themselves. — Matt Taibbi

One can't go on anymore, she said, electronics seems so clean and yet it dirties, dirties tremendously, and it obliges you to leave traces of yourself everywhere as if you were shitting and peeing on yourself continuously: I want to leave nothing, my favorite key is the one that deletes. — Elena Ferrante

During the height of the government enforcement of the Civil Rights Act, some segregated townships filled in their municipal pools rather than let nonwhite kids share in the perverse joy of peeing in the water. — Paul Beatty

I'll be peeing like a champion in no time — M. Leighton

As Ian looked at her, he felt something in his chest slip and shift. The pressure came with a blood-tingling rush of triumph and satisfaction, pride and a deeply burning sense of possessiveness. His inner caveman warrior had been awakened and wanted to rush around the room, peeing into the corners, marking it - and her - as his own, while shouting Mine! and randomly smashing things for emphasis.
But he knew that was he was feeling was the equivalent of emotional and hormonal indigestion. He hadn't done this in a long time. And he particularly hadn't done it with a woman he liked as much as this one. In fact, he'd never had sex with anyone that he genuinely liked as much as he liked Phoebe. — Suzanne Brockmann

The first time I lay actual eyes on the real David Lynch on the set of his movie, he's peeing on a tree ... Mr. David Lynch, a prodigious coffee drinker, apparently pees hard and often. — David Foster Wallace

Well, thanks for not shooting anyone, I guess", said Marcus. "My contribution was to somehow refrain from peeing myself. You can thank me later. — Dan Wells

Some boys walk by and you cry, seeing them. They feel good, they look good, they are good. Oh, they're not above peeing off a bridge, or stealing an occasional dime-store pencil sharpener; it's not that. It's just, you know, seeing them pass, that's how they'll be all their life; they'll get hit, hurt, cut, bruised, and always wonder why, why does it happen? how can it happen to them? — Ray Bradbury

Are you up? Dressing? (Astrid)
No. I'm pissing on your rug. What do you think I'm doing? (Zarek)
I'm blind. For all I know you really are peeing on my rug, which is a very nice rug incidentally, so I hope you're kidding. (Astrid) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Shoot. I feel guilty for peeing. That first bottle of wine alone was almost two hundred dollars. — Tina Reber

Peeing on a stick is not as easy as it sounds! #WhenRavensFall — Matilda Wren

When I entered, she sat up and focused on the bag in my hand. "The chick at the store said it works better in the morning, but it might work tonight. I bought a few extra tests, just in case. Do you need to pee?"
Lark stared at me then burst into laughter. "A few weeks into our relationship and we're talking about peeing. Awesome. — Bijou Hunter