Nut Job Quotes & Sayings

Jon Spiro had not hired Pex and Chips for their debating sills. In the job interview, they had only been set one task. A hundred applicants were handed a walnut and asked to smash it however they could. Only two succeeded. Pex had shouted at the walnut for a few minutes, then flattened it between his giant palms. Chips had opted for a more controversial method. He placed the walnut on the table, grabbed is interviewer by the ponytail, and used the man's forehead to smash the nut. Both men were hired on the spot. They quickly established themselves as Arno Blunt's most reliable leiutenants for in-house work. They were not allowed outside Chicago, as this could involve map reading, something Pex and Chips were not very good at. — Eoin Colfer

Okay," Jack said. "I'm not really sure what you want from me." "I want you to stop trying to deny every feeling I ever have, Jack. I want you to stop telling me not to feel bad when I already do. I want you to stop telling me I look fine when it's so patently obvious that I don't. I want you to stop being so uncomfortable when things aren't perfect that you immediately start trying to pretend they are." Even as the words were coming out of my mouth, I realized how unfair I was being. Yes, I wanted for him to accept my emotional reality. But only when it suited me. I also wanted him to tell me that the baby would be fine when it was what I needed to hear. At least Jack was consistent. I was a nut job. — Jennifer Coburn

So I'm guessing you're Seven and Ten; What can you do?" I say as I find our rifles in the sand and hand each of them a gun.
"You can call me Marina," the girl with the brown hair says. "And I can breathe under water and see in the dark and heal the sick and wounded. And I have telekinesis."
Call me Ella, I hear ten say in my head. Aside from my telepathy, I can change ages.
"Awesome. I'm four, that nut job with the long black hair is nine and the beast is my chimaera, Bernie Kosar. — Pittacus Lore

He wasn't an addict. He was a self-medicating nut job. — Pam Godwin

Don't beat yourself up about being a nut job. Facebook's made stalkers out of us all. — Suzanne Wright

Check your privilege, Hitler! I'm a nut job, not an asshole. — Rick Remender

Big D. November '63. He was there that Big Weekend. He caught the Big Moment and took this Big Ride.
He was a sergeant on Vegas PD. He was married. He had a chemistry degree. His father was a big Mormon fat cat. Wayne Senior was jungled up all over the nut Right. He did Klan ops for Mr. Hoover and Dwight Holly. He pushed high-line hate tracts. He rode the far-Right zeitgeist and stayed in the know. He knew about the JFK hit. It was multi-faction: Cuban exiles, rogue CIA, mob. Senior bought Junior a ticket to ride.
Extradition job with one caveat: kill the extraditee. — James Ellroy

I loved fast driving.Isaiah and I had drag raced all last summer. What I didn't love was a middle-aged nut job who couldn't steer straight. — Katie McGarry

This is a huge foyer. She spun in a slow circle, taking in the high ceilings.
She'd said the word using its French pronunciation, foy-ay. Cletus said it that way. The rest of us said foy-er, like it's spelled, because we lived in the United States and weren't pretentious nut jobs. Not that I thought Sarah was a pretentious nut job or made such a judgment about all people based on their pronunciation of that single word.
Just Cletus. He said foy-ay and was most definitely a pretentious nut job. — Penny Reid

I don't know who you are; you could be an axe murderer for all I know. How am I supposed to trust you and follow you? For that matter, follow you where?" Gabe inquired.
"Search yourself, what do your instincts tell you?" Uri asked.
"That you're a crazy nut job and freaking me out!" Gabe snapped back. — Wendy Owens

Whenever I meet a real nut job in church, I am always grateful that they are going to church. Imagine how crazy they would be if they didn't have rules to follow. — Jim Gaffigan

If you draw a circle, there will always be an inside and an outside, and unless you're a total nut job, it's pretty easy to see which is which. It just happens. — Lauren Oliver

Will I be allowed to drive you this afternoon?" David picked at his salad.
"Oh, about that ... I have a doctor's appointment. I'm riding with Bill and Andy."
David's eyes narrowed. "Are you ill?"
"No." I was hesitant to tell him I was seeing a psychiatrist. I didn't want him to think I was a nut job. — Nely Cab

Don't touch my junk, you airport security goon
my package belongs to no one but me, and do you really think I'm a Nigerian nut job preparing for my 72-virgin orgy by blowing my johnson to kingdom come? — Charles Krauthammer

New Rule: Gun-control people have to stop pressuring Starbucks to ban guns. I want my gun nuts overcaffeinated, twitchy, and accident-prone. That way, the problem will take care of itself. Plus, if just one gun nut kills just one pseudo-intellectual writing a screenplay-slash-graphic-novel on his iPad, natural selection is doing its job. — Bill Maher

I need you to be serious right now."
"Probably you shouldn't have drugged me, then."
She rolls her eyes and waves in dismissal. "It was chloroform. You'll be fine."
"And Rayna?"
She knows what I'm asking, and she nods. "She should be waking up right about now." Mom sits back in her chair. "That girl has the personality of a mako shark."
"Says the nut job who chloroformed her own daughter."
She sighs. "One day you'll understand why I did that. Today is obviously not that day."
"No, no, no," I say, palming the air with the universal "don't even" sign. "You don't get to play the responsible parent card. Let's not forget the little matter of the last eighteen-freaking-years, Nalia." There. I said it. This conversation is finally going to happen. — Anna Banks