Magrat Quotes & Sayings

No,' she said. 'No, I don't reckon that's what I do now. Are you watchin', Mrs Gogol? Are you watchin' real close?'
Her gaze travelled the room and rested for just a fraction of a second on Magrat.
Then she reached over, carefully, and thrust her arm up to the elbow into the burning torch.
And the doll in Erzulie Gogol's hands burst into flame.
It went on blazing even after the witch had screamed and dropped it on to the floor. It went on burning until Nanny Ogg ambled over with a jug of fruit juice from the buffet, whistling between her teeth, and put it out.
Granny withdrew her hand. It was unscathed. — Terry Pratchett

And Magrat was sick all night just at the thought of it and had the dire rear. — Terry Pratchett

It's me,' said Damen. 'It's me, here with you. Say my name.' 'Damianos.' He — C.S. Pacat

Magrat had used a lot of powder to make her face pale and interesting. It combined with the lavishly applied mascara to give the guard the impression that he was looking at two flies that had crashed into a sugar bowl. — Terry Pratchett

It's all right," said the Fool urgently. "You'll be perfectly safe with me." "Yes, I will, won't I," said Magrat, trying to look around him to see where the others had gone. "They're staging the play outside, in the big courtyard. We'll get a lovely view from one of the gate towers, and no one else will be there. I put some wine up there for us, and everything." When she still looked half-reluctant he added, "And there's a cistern of water and a fireplace that the guards use sometimes. In case you want to wash your hair. — Terry Pratchett

Would you care to share our lunch, old ... good wo ... miss?" he said. "It's only salt pork, I'm afraid." "Meat is extremely bad for the digestive system," said Magrat. "If you could see inside your colon you'd be horrified." "I think I would," muttered Hwel. — Terry Pratchett

In a certain light and from a carefully chosen angle, Magrat was not unattractive. — Terry Pratchett

Magrat woke up. And knew she wasn't a witch anymore. The feeling just crept over her, as part of the normal stock-taking that any body automatically does in the first seconds of emergence from the pit of dreams: arms: 2, legs: 2, existential dread: 58%, randomized guilt: 94%, witchcraft level: 00.00. — Terry Pratchett

Then Magrat, who in Nanny Ogg's opinion had an innocent talent for treading on dangerous ground, said: "I wonder if we did the right thing? I'm sure it was a job for a handsome prince." "Hah!" said Granny, who was riding ahead. "And what good would that be? Cutting your way through a bit of bramble is how you can tell he's going to be a good husband, is it? That's fairy godmotherly thinking, that is! Goin' around inflicting happy endings on people whether they wants them or not, eh? — Terry Pratchett

What some people need," said Magrat, to the world in general, "is a bit more heart."

"What some people need," said Granny Weatherwax, to the stormy sky, "is a lot more brain."

Then she clutched at her hat to stop the wind from blowing it off.

What I need, thought Nanny Ogg fervently, is a drink. — Terry Pratchett

Look," said Magrat desperately, "why don't I go by myself?" "'Cos you ain't experienced at fairy godmothering," said Granny Weatherwax. This was too much even for Magrat's generous soul. "Well, nor are you," she said. "That's true," Granny conceded. "But the point is ... the point is ... the point is we've not been experienced for a lot longer than you." "We've got a lot of experience of not having any experience," said Nanny Ogg happily. "That's what counts every time," said Granny. — Terry Pratchett

Witches just aren't like that," said Magrat. "We live in harmony with the great cycles of Nature, and do no harm to anyone, and it's wicked of them to say we don't. We ought to fill their bones with hot lead."
The other two looked at her with a certain amount of surprised admiration. She blushed, although not greenly, and looked at her knees.
"Goodie Whemper did a recipe," she confessed. "It's quite easy. What you do is, you get some lead, and you - "
"I don't think that would be appropriate," said Granny carefully, after a certain amount of internal struggle. "It could give people the wrong idea."
"But not for long," said Nanny wistfully. — Terry Pratchett

She never sent the castle to sleep", said Granny, "that's just and old wife's tale. She just stirred up time a little. It's not as hard as people think, everyone does it all the time. It's like rubber, is time, you can stretch it to suit yourself."
Magrat was about to say: That's not right, time is time, every second lasts a second, that's its job. The she recalled weeks that had flown past and afternoons that had lasted forever. Some minutes had lasted hours, some hours had gone past so quickly she hadn't been aware they'd gone past at all.
"But that's just people's perception, isn't it?"
"Oh yes", said Granny, "of course it is, it all is, what difference does that make? — Terry Pratchett

Haven't you got any romance in your soul?" said Magrat plaintively. "No," said Granny. "I ain't. And stars don't care what you wish, and magic don't make things better, and no one doesn't get burned who sticks their hand in a fire. If you want to amount to anything as a witch, Magrat Garlick, you got to learn three things. What's real, what's not real, and what's the difference. — Terry Pratchett

But you don't even like being a Fool!" "I hate it. But that's got nothing to do with it. If I've got to be a Fool, I'll do it properly." "That's really stupid," said Magrat. "Foolish, I'd prefer." The — Terry Pratchett

Magrat liked to think she was good with children, and worried that she wasn't. She didn't like them very much, and worried about this too. Nanny Ogg seemed to be effortlessly good with children by alternately and randomly giving them either a sweet or a thick ear, while Granny Weatherwax ignored them for most of the time and that seemed to work just as well. — Terry Pratchett

A strange thing,' she said. 'They both wear this same badge. Two bears on a black and gold shield. Anyone know what that means?' 'It's the badge of King Verence,' said Magrat. 'Who's he?' said Granny Weatherwax. 'He rules this country,' said Magrat. 'Oh. That king,' said Granny, as if the matter was hardly worth noting. — Terry Pratchett

Magrat bought occult jewelry as a sort of distraction from being Magrat. She had three large boxes of the stuff and was still exactly the same person. — Terry Pratchett

Writers may be solitary but they also tend to flock together: they like being solitary together. — Neil Gaiman

Magrat said she could never make the wand do that and Esme said no because, she wasted time wishing for thinges to happen instead of working out how to make them happen. — Terry Pratchett

Regret at telling her about the dragon, about the words, settled into his gut. It left him feeling too exposed, like his nerves sat atop his skin. — Laura Kaye

This ain't right, you know. She's the one who ought to rule, fair enough. And you used magic to help her this far, and that's all right. But it stops right here. It's up to her what happens next. You can't make things right by magic. You can only stop making them wrong."
Mrs. Gogol pulled herself up to her full, impressive height. "Who's you to say what I can and can't do here?"
"We're her godmothers," said Granny.
"That's right," said Nanny Ogg.
"We've got a wand, too," said Magrat.
"But you hate godmothers, Mistress Weatherwax," said Mrs. Gogol.
"We're the other kind," said Granny. "We're the kind that gives people what they know they really need, not what we think they ought to want. — Terry Pratchett

The saviors of the world, society's last hope. — Bertrand Russell

There aren't many benefactors who don't say, like Satan: All these things will I give you if you bow down and worship me. — Nicolas Chamfort

You're wondering if I really would slit your throat. To tell the truth, I don't know either, but think of the fun we could have finding out. — Terry Pratchett

Magrat wondered what it was like, spending your whole life doing something you didn't want to do. Like being dead, she considered, only worse, the reason being, you were alive to suffer it. — Terry Pratchett

They are ruby-colored, aren't they?" he said. "Well, they're red," said Magrat. "Is red all right?" "They've got to be red." All the other dwarfs nodded. "It's no good if they're not red." Magrat gave him a blank look and shut the door. — Terry Pratchett

I'm right there with you, darlin'. Unless you step on a landmine, in which case I'm way back in the Operations Room. — Eoin Colfer

Divers alarums and excursions', she read, uncertainly. 'That means lots of terrible happenings, said Magrat. 'You always put that in plays.'
Alarums and what?', said Nanny Ogg, who hadn't been listening.
Excursions', said Magrat patienly.
Oh.' Nanny Ogg brightened a bit. 'The seaside would be nice,' she said.
Oh do shut up, Gytha,' said Granny Weatherwax. 'They're not for you. They're only for divers, like it says. Probably so they can recover from all them alarums. — Terry Pratchett

Can you put your hands on my crotch?"
"Why, hell no, I cannot." I didn't remember anything like this happening in Pride and Prejudice. — Jennifer Echols

It's daft, locking us up," said Nanny. "I'd have had us killed."
"That's because you're basically good," said Magrat. "The good are innocent and create justice. The bad are guilty, which is why they invent mercy. — Terry Pratchett

You're wondering whether I really would cut your throat," panted Magrat. "I don't know either. Think of the fun we could have together, finding out — Terry Pratchett