Keep Checking My Phone Quotes & Sayings

When I go a stretch without tweeting, I will occasionally get an email from my mom, checking in. I always find this amusing but also gratifying: Thanks to Twitter, I can keep in touch with my parents and let them in on what I'm doing in a way that even the regular phone calls of a doting daughter can't do. — Rachel Sklar

There are five unread messages on the screen, which is what happens when you're the meat in a hot girl sandwich. Threesomes trump checking your phone. That's a no-brainer.

Logan: Hey, bro, Wellsy's friend Allie is crashing at our place this weekend.

Logan: Keep your dick in your pants. G and I aren't in the mood to beat u senseless if u try something. Wellsy might be in the mood for violence, tho. So: dick = pants = don't bother our guest.

Hannah: Allie's staying with u guys til Sunday. She's in a vulnerable place right now. Don't take advantage of her or else I'll be unhappy. And u don't want to make me unhappy, do u?

I snicker. Hannah, diplomatic as always. I quickly scan the last two messages.

Garrett: Allie's gonna crash in my room.

Garrett: Your dick can stay in your room.

Jeez, what is everybody's fascination with my dick? — Elle Kennedy