Intelligent Humour Quotes & Sayings

[L]ife is a phenomenon in need of criticism, for we are, as fallen creatures, in permanent danger of worshipping false gods, of failing to understand ourselves and misinterpreting the behaviour of others, of growing unproductively anxious or desirous, and of losing ourselves to vanity and error. Surreptitiously and beguilingly, then, with humour or gravity, works of art
novels, poems, plays, paintings or films
can function as vehicles to explain our condition to us. They may act as guides to a truer, more judicious, more intelligent understanding of the world. — Alain De Botton

Honestly, Jared, one thing at a time. Why are you in a well with me? This is a really bad rescue!" [ ... ]
"I called the police as I was running to the well. I'm sure they're coming."
"Did they say they were coming?" Kami asked suspiciously. "Or did you shout, 'Kami's in the well!' before jumping in the well too, thus loosing your phone and making sure the police think it was some kids playing a dumb joke?"
Jared paused. [ ... ]
"Alternate plan," Jared said. "Do you have a very intelligent collie who might communicate through a system of barks to your parents that little Kami is in the well? — Sarah Rees Brennan

An intelligent man will use a book to settle an argument. Preferably a hardback with a thick spine, flat across the bridge of the nose. — Shatrujeet Nath

The thingy? You want me, the most intelligent cognitive processor in the known worlds, to say thingy?"
"Yes," I reaffirmed. "That is correct."
Do you stay up nights thinking of ways to humiliate me?" HARV asked. — John Zakour

For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons. — Douglas Adams

We owe to one another all the wit and good humour we can command; and nothing so clears our mental vistas as sympathetic and intelligent conversation. — Agnes Repplier

And specimens like this confirmed there had been some kind of divine rule in the universe because no natural selection process was up to the task of creating something like him. This was some god's, somewhere's, handiwork. — Nicole Williams

IF YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT YOU ARE STUPID,IT MEANS YOU ARE INTELLIGENT. — Shaikh Mustafa

Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one? — Bob Monkhouse

No intelligent idea can gain general acceptance unless some stupidity is mixed in with it — Fernando Pessoa

I'm only saying what you won't. He's a hunk, admit it. A tall, dark, exotic hunk who wants to bed you, and you must be a fucking nun, because it's been three weeks since you met him and you're going to have to remove the cobwebs from your vagina with forceps soon, they're growing into intelligent life form - — Dianna Hardy