Iliza Shlesinger Funny Quotes & Sayings

It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about being a girl, it's about being a funny comic. — Iliza Shlesinger

The honors of this world, what are they but puff, and emptiness, and peril of falling? — Saint Augustine

People often don't understand the engine that drives corruption. Particularly in India, they assume government equals corruption, private companies equal efficiency. But government officials are not genetically programmed to be corrupt. Corruption is linked to power. If it is the corporations that are powerful, then they will be corrupt. — Arundhati Roy

I wasn't a 'hot chick' in high school. I was 'funny' and a tomboy and probably a little uncomfortable with my amazing boobs. — Iliza Shlesinger

Manet nonetheless seems to have been captivated by her appearance, or at least by the visual possibilities of dressing her in exotic costumes and placing her in beguiling poses. — Ross King

I arrived at the Swindon branch of TJ-Maxx at a little after two. I knew as well as anyone that the store hadn't been deliberately set up as a bargain store for end-of-line designer garments, but rather as a high-security facility for the imprisonment of dangerous criminals. — Jasper Fforde

Verily, I swear, 'tis better to be lowly born, and range with humble livers in content, than to be perk'd up in a glistering grief, and wear a golden sorrow. — William Shakespeare

Flexibility is an essential part of Jazz. It's what gives Jazz music the ability to combine with all other types of music and not lose its identity. — Wynton Marsalis

Stories of the Virgin being succoured by a friendly palm tree had actually been a Christian tradition for centuries, and seem in turn to have derived from a legend told by the pagan Greeks, was blithely ignored - as, of course, it was bound to be. — Tom Holland