If I Piss You Off Quotes & Sayings

You know, Sam, it's beginning to piss me off how you figure me out. How the heck am I supposed to be intriguing and mysterious if you keep figuring me out? — Kristen Ashley

I have this weird sort of Gemini thing where I can really be empathetic and a loving person. But if you piss me off, I can be one of the meanest, most sadistic people. — Bill Burr

Now, as I understand it, the bards were feared. They were respected, but more than that they were feared. If you were just some magician, if you'd pissed off some witch, then what's she gonna do, she's gonna put a curse on you, and what's gonna happen? Your hens are gonna lay funny, your milk's gonna go sour, maybe one of your kids is gonna get a hare-lip or something like that - no big deal.
You piss off a bard, and forget about putting a curse on you, he might put a satire on you. And if he was a skilful bard, he puts a satire on you, it destroys you in the eyes of your community, it shows you up as ridiculous, lame, pathetic, worthless, in the eyes of your community, in the eyes of your family, in the eyes of your children, in the eyes of yourself, and if it's a particularly good bard, and he's written a particularly good satire, then three hundred years after you're dead, people are still gonna be laughing, at what a twat you were. — Alan Moore

If you'd just told me you wanted her for yourself, I wouldn't have opened my mouth. Asshole."
"He doesn't want me for himself," Melanie said. "He isn't looking for a relationship."
"It doesn't matter if he's looking," Richart grumbled. "He's found one. The two of you can't take your eyes off each other. And in the rare moments you do, you usually touch."
"What?" Bastien said the same time Melanie did.
Was she as appalled that her feelings were so transparent as he was?
"Don't worry." Richart drew out a handkerchief and wiped his crimson lips. "I doubt anyone else has noticed. Bastien is usually too busy pissing them all off."
"He doesn't piss you off?" Melanie asked.
"Other than just now" - Richart glared at Bastien - "no. I've spent enough time in his company that I've become immune to his bullshit. — Dianne Duvall

I heard - " I began.
"I let you hear," he cut me off.
I shut my mouth, closed the door, and leaned back against it. The corners of his lips turned up as if at some private amusement, and for a moment I thought we were having one of those silent conversations.
You think it's safe to close yourself in with the Beast?
If you think I'm afraid of you, you're wrong.
You should be afraid.
Maybe you should be afraid of me. Go ahead, piss me off, Barrons. See what happens.
Little girl thinks she's all grown up now.
His mouth moved into a smile that I've grown familiar with over the past few months, shaped of competing tensions: part mockery, part pissed off, and part turned on. Men are so complicated. — Karen Marie Moning

I have PMS and GPS, which means if you piss me off, I will find you. — Eve Langlais

He wasn't looking at me, and I wasn't looking at him. "Sometimes I wonder if you make decisions just to piss me off."
I glared at the road. "Sometimes I wonder if you give yourself too much credit in my decision-making. — Catherine Doyle

You see, I don't know why I did it, he declared as if he had
just discovered the cure for cancer. But the only thing he had
discovered was yet another way to piss me off. — Danka V.

Are you insane? I'm not going to change my mind."
"Yes you will." Braden sighed. "We're going to need each other through this. All of us. But if you can't do that, then I'm going to play hardball. I'm going to do whatever it takes. Some of it will frustrate you, some of it will turn on, and some of it will hopefully really piss you off."
"You are insane."
"No." We spun around to see Ellie standing in the kitchen doorway in her bathrobe, wearing a small, exhausted but determined smile. "He's fighting for what he wants. — Samantha Young

Roarke: "Our engines don't run at the same speed."
Eve: "What the hell does that mean?"
Roarke: "Just that."
Eve: "It sounds like something that ought to piss me off. But I can't figure out exactly why. When I do, I might have to pop you one."
Roarke: "I'll look forward to it. If you don't sleep, eat. You need something in your stomach. And what are you grinning at?"
Eve: "You. You're such a wife."
Roarke: "Now, I'm pissed off. — J.D. Robb

If you're the wolf, though, I'll chop off your head and piss down the hole — Sarah Blakley-Cartwright

I've heard it argued that men aren't physically wired to be with only one person. We have a built-in biological need to scatter our seed as far and as wide as possible. Something about survival of our gene strain. It doesn't matter if you're gay or straight, they say, you just can't help yourself. Perhaps not. If left to my own devices, though, I'd also eat Ben & Jerry's brownie batter ice cream until I weighed six hundred pounds, but somehow I manage to stop myself when my pants start to get a little tight around the middle. But to each his own. And if you're going to do something that might piss off your partner, you might as well have science on your side. — Michael Thomas Ford

Your charm makes me want to punch you in the nose."
That made Ricky chuckle. "I'm not trying to piss you off, darlin'. Just trying to get you to give me a chance."
"Why?" she had to ask. "I'm really not that interesting. I'm cute but not stunning. I'm not excessively tall. And sexually, I'm rather vanilla. So then what is it?"
Rickey decided to be honest with her. "I like your hair."
She suddenly went tense. "You don't have to be mean."
"I'm not. I like curls. If we have sex, can I play with them?"
"I don't even know how to respond to that. — Shelly Laurenston

I don't know what's going on with you and Travis, but I know that he's going to do something stupid to piss you off. It's a tic he has. He doesn't get close with anyone very often, and for whatever reason he's let you in. But you have to overlook his demons. It's the only way he'll know."
"Know what?" I asked,
"If you'll climb over the wall. — Jamie McGuire

I HATE you," she told her sister over the speakerphone in her secure wing of Brigid and Carwyn's house. "No, you don't." "I do." "What did Murphy do?" "Nothing." Except kiss me in Galway and remind me that I miss him like a lost limb. Stare at me during the opera as if he'd eat me alive in the most pleasurable way possible. Show off his intellect, which has always been the most attractive thing about him. "Patrick Murphy has been a complete gentleman," she said. "Unerringly polite and respectful. Painfully welcoming." Anne heard Mary suck on her cigarette and release a breath. "Hateful man. That would irritate the piss out of me. — Elizabeth Hunter

Meaning I want to put words to it. I want to give it a name. I'm not okay with kissing you and holding you, being by your side for all the things a boyfriend would be there for, without it being understood in no uncertain terms that that's what I am to you. I wan us to be a couple. I want to be by your side though everything that's coming, to hold your hand when you're scared and pick you up when you're weak. I want to know that you're not going to run to some other asshole when we disagree or when I try to make sure you do what we both know is the best for you. I wan you to run to me, even if I piss you off. Because I will piss you off. Because I love you. And because you love me. And because I can't go one more day without being able to tell you that as often as it comes to mind, which is about a dozen times a minute. - Jamie Babcock — Catherine Gayle

People always ask me if I hate the nuns. Do I make my movies extra dirty to piss them off? I always say no, that's not the point. To a Catholic, a movie is only dirty if it makes you want to have sex more. If it makes you feel sick, disgusted, ashamed of your own body, then it's not a dirty movie at all. It's a Catholic movie. And I make very Catholic movies. — Kevin Smith

Now, when you piss off a guy, you don't gotta say you're sorry even after you shoot 'em in the head with bird shot, but when you piss off a girl, saying 'I'm sorry' ain't even good enough. You gotta say it about a hundred times, and you gotta yammer on and on about how dumb you are and how you don't blame 'em if they never speak to you again. — Sandra Kring

We're going to need each other through this. All of us. But if you can't do that, then I'm going to play hardball. I'm going to do whatever it takes. Some of it will frustrate you, some of it will turn you on, and some of it will hopefully really piss you off — Samantha Young

You should probably know right now, Eli Pace, that I do not appreciate being treated like an imbecile, nor do I appreciate being ordered around like some kind of subservient human being. If you want me to do something because you're concerned for my safety, tell me you're concerned and then ask me to do what you believe is necessary for me to preserve that safety. Don't turn into a raving barbarian, because all that's going to do is piss me the hell off. — Christine Warren

Then why haven't you killed yourself? (Astrid)
Why should I? The only enjoyment I have in my life is knowing I piss off everyone around me. If I were dead, it would make them all happy. God forbid I should ever do that. (Zarek) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Seriously? You're okay with sharing? Most of my dates hate when I ask to taste their food."

"Saffron." His tone has grown rather severe.

"Yes?"

"First, I don't want to hear about your other dates, it'll only piss me off. You are here with me."

Possessive much? And yet that declaration has my tummy flip-flopping in pleasure.

"Fair. What's two?"

"If I don't share then I won't be getting any of that and I really want to try that."

"Oh, Logan, yes you do. This is like crack."

His smile comes in a flash. "Then hand me your bread plate. — L.A. Fiore

I used to be more refined but at my age, you start to realize all that politeness doesn't get you very far. Better to be honest and direct, even if it does piss off a few people along the way. — Christopher Golden

You do that all the time you know. you ask me questions when you know the answer will piss you off. ask me a question where the answer could be yes? ask me if you're worth the hard work? ask me if in the last seven years of my life i've woken up in a cold sweat knowing i lost the most important person in my life apart from this kid i'm holding? ask me if getting you pregnat has felt like the best thing that's happened to me since my son was born? — Melina Marchetta

Know this, Hazard," he edged out, ignoring
Hazard's enthusiastic glare. "I'll kick your ass if you piss me off any more." Jesse paused, as if
imagining the scene, then added with childish spite, "Oh, and I'll laugh too."
"Give me a cigarette burn while you're at it?"
"Just shut up. Your attempt at sarcasm makes me want to barf."
"Good, I'm glad. — J.R. Lenk

To annoy or piss off are light offences. I'd say if you abuse the goodness of a novelist or a writer, the truth is, he or she can kill you multiple times or cannibalise you in many antagonist characters. — Angelica Hopes

That's what they want: two women. Fellas, I think that's a bit lofty. Because, come on, think about it - if you can't satisfy that one woman, why do you want to piss off another one? Why have two angry women in the bed with you at the same time? And think about it - you know how much you hate to talk after sex, imagine having two women just nagging you to death. — Wanda Sykes

I thought you were disgusted by the people that come to my club." "They're still people." He presses the button again. "If you go outside, you will be killed. If you make noise, you will be sent outside. Don't piss me off." Just like that, Chester's goes completely silent. — Karen Marie Moning

You deserve better than me," I whispered, and the selfish part of me hoped he wouldn't hear.
He heard.
Marc spun me around so fast I would have slipped again if he weren't holding me up. We were so close drops of water from his chin fell onto my chest, and I had to crane my neck to see him.
"You are perfect for me, Faythe, just like you are, because you're not perfect. You're headstrong, and impulsive, and outspoken, and I'm possessive, and overprotective, and too easy to piss off. We're both wrong for a lot of things, but we're right for each other. Do you understand?"
I nodded. I didn't know what else to do. — Rachel Vincent

One of us should stop her," Ranger said to Morelli, his eyes fixed on me.
"Not going to be me," Morelli said. "Have you ever tried to stop her from doing something she wanted to do?"
"Haven't had much success at it," Ranger said.
Morelli rocked on his heels. "One thing I've learned about Stephanie over the years, she's not good at taking orders."
"Has authority issues," Ranger said.
"And if you piss her off, she'll get even. She ran me over with her father's Buick once and broke my leg."
That got a small smile out of Ranger.
"Nice to see you boys bonding," I said. — Janet Evanovich

The thing that bothers me the most is the recklessness and greed of the local ranchers, who run too many cattle back here, choking with waste the creek that runs through my property. There's certain times of day that the cowboys like to send them turds down the river. Them f**kers piss me off. if you gotta mess up the ecology of the world in order to raise a bunch of cows, well eat somethin else. I'm not a fan of the cowboys. — Merle Haggard

One corner of his mouth twitched. "Should I consider that a warning?"
"Just don't be surprised if you find yourself riding a bolt of lightning if you piss me off."
"I'm into kinky shit, so that works. — Larissa Ione

What does that mean, 'real'? Amn't I real, you? If you cut me, do I not bleed? If you piss me off, will I not kick you up the arse? — Tad Williams

Hey, God, did I do something to piss you off? Because I'm starting to think you enjoy twisting the knife in my heart every chance you get. If too much happiness dares to encroach on my life, does some siren go off up there? Uh-oh, Gray's too happy right now. We can't have that. Time to shit all over his life again. — Katie Kacvinsky

You listen to me now and stop cutting me off. It's rude." She stopped moving and dropped her hand. "You can't tell me what I can and can't do; where I can go and who I can see."
She stopped talking so he requested, "May I speak?"
"Only if you don't piss me off when you do it, — Kristen Ashley

Being on TV in front of people is a lot different than sitting in a dark room with a microphone. When I had my radio show, I was on four hours a day for 20-something years. If you put a live microphone in front of Mother Teresa for that amount of time, she'd piss somebody off. — Wendy Williams

Look I have somewhere I have to be and I don't particularly love that I have to go, but you freaking out and making a scene is not going to do anything other than piss me off. I hope you had a good time last night and you can leave your number but we both know the chances of me calling you are slim to none. If you don't want to be treated like crap maybe you should stop going home with drunken dudes you don't know. Trust me we're really only after one thing and the next morning all we really want is for you to go quietly away. I have a headache and I feel like I'm going to hurl, plus I have to spend the next hour in a car with someone that will be silently loathing me and joyously plotting my death so really can we just save the histrionics and get a move on it? — Jay Crownover

When the forces that seek to defy God whisper if in our ears - if God really loved me, I wouldn't feel like this ... If I really am beloved, then I should have everything I want ... if I really belong to God, things in my life wouldn't suck - to remember that God has named us and claimed us as God's own. When what seems to be depression or compulsive eating or narcissism or despair or discouragement or resentment or isolation takes over, try picturing it as a vulnerable and desperate force seeking to defy God's grace and mercy in your life. And then tell it to piss off and say defiantly to it, "I am baptized" or "I am God's," because nothing else gets to tell you who you are. — Nadia Bolz-Weber

Out of the trees came faerie after faerie, the entirety of the Dark Court, who had apparently been listening to the whole exchange. I looked at Reth, shocked, but he just smiled. I clenched my jaw and shook my head, annoyed. They'd had a plan all along, and it hadn't involved me. I was here for show - Hey, look! Our pet Empty One! You can hitch a ride back if you join now! Limited time offer!
"I did warn her you were less likely to come if you thought you weren't in charge," Reth said, his voice cracked but his tone self-congratulatory.
"Did you warn her I'm highly likely to back out of the entire thing if you piss me off?"
"Perhaps you had better watch your back, stupid glowy golden faerie man whore."
He frowned at me. "That made no sense."
"Good! Now maybe I can join your club." I took a step away from him but immediately felt terrible when he swayed and looked like he was going to fall. — Kiersten White