I Am Bored Funny Quotes & Sayings

Yet there are some people - Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he's a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I'm doing it right now and you all seem bored. — Bob Saget

I'm about being funny. If I can make a joke using profanity, I will. But for the most part, that can get awfully old and boring. — Howard Stern

The really destructive feature of their relationship is its inherent quality of boredom. It is quite natural for Peter often to feel bored with Otto - they have scarecely a single interest in common - but Peter, for sentimental reasons, will never admit that this is so. When Otto, who has no such motives for pretending, says, "It's so dull here!" I invariably see Peter wince and looked pained. Yet Otto is actually far less often bored than Peter himself; he finds Peter's company genuinely amusing, and is quite glad to be with him most of the day. Often, when Otto has been chattering rubbish for an hour without stopping, I can see that Peter really longs for him to be quiet and go away. But to admit this would be, in Peter's eyes, a total defeat, so he only laughs and rubs his hands, tacitly appealing to me to support him in his pretense of finding Otto inexhaustibly delightful and funny. — Christopher Isherwood

The only furniture in the dank space was a flimsy cot. Water dripped steadily in one corner. A hole in the floor appeared to serve as a latrine. What most caught Kendra's eye were the messages scratched on the wall. She roamed the cell, reading the crudely inscribed phrases.

"Seth rules!

Welcome to Seth's House.

Seth rocks!

Seth was here. Now it's your turn.

Seth Sorenson forever.

Enjoy the food!

If you're reading this, you can read.

All roads lead to Seth.

Is it still dripping?

Seth haunts these halls.

You're in a Turkish prison!

Seth is the man!

Use the meal mats as toilet paper." And so forth.

Cold, hopeless, and alone, Kendra found herself giggling at the messages her brother had scrawled. He must have been so bored! — Brandon Mull

I don't know how long i could be a vet before i got bored and started shagging stuff. — Frankie Boyle

There's a story everywhere. Being bored to death someplace is basically a funny proposition. What you have to watch out for is you don't write a boring story about a boring place. — Tim Cahill

Your perception is riveting, Amal," he says in a bored and sarcastic tone, dropping the note down on my desk. "It's comforting to know that there are people in my class who have the maturity and intelligence to make derogatory comments about other people's external appearances."
Now what am I supposed to say to that?
"What do you have to say for yourself?"
Friggin' mind reader. — Randa Abdel-Fattah

If you give the audience what they expect, they'll be bored. There are no rules: You do what you want while respecting the boundaries. You don't poke people in the eye; you do things they haven't seen before and make it accessible, funny and clever. — Matthew Vaughn

Attraction is a funny thing. Women can be beautiful and still do nothing for me. They can be stereotypically sexy and I will still pass them over. They can look innocent and it won't interest me, have a sassy attitude and I'll be looking elsewhere. I get bored easily and am as fickle as April weather. — Holly Stone

Kids enjoy laughing and are seldom bored when they find something funny. They also ask questions, often to adults, because they understand that the more words they can comprehend about a funny story or a joke, the more they'll enjoy it. — Brian P. Cleary

I'm kinda tired. I was up all night trying to round off infinity. Then I got bored and went out and painted passing lines on curved roads. — Steven Wright

I was walking around bored one day, and I started filming stuff with my cellphone. There are all these shows where people are trying to do these outrageous stunts, and I thought it would be funny to do all these stunts that aren't outrageous but then act like they are. — Harland Williams

These boys need women who can take the heat without meltin' like butter, and sometimes that heat is fiery. They need women who can give back their shit so they don't walk all over 'em and get bored out of their fucking skulls. And they need women who can go soft when the situation demands because they get hard knocks on a regular basis, sometimes literal y, and comin' home to somethin' soft is the only way to cope. — Kristen Ashley

Static cackled from the cafeteria speaker. A bored female voice come on. "Victoria Brennan, please report to the headmaster's office. Victoria Brennan to the headmaster's office."
Classmates glanced our way. Whispers sprang up around me.
"Not good." Shelton was reaching for his earlobe.
"Tell them you have amnesia," Hi said. "Or dementia. Pretend you're Joan of Arc."
"Thanks for the support, guys. If I'm not back for class, look for my body in the harbor."
Hiram's hand flew up. "I call her iTunes collection. Shelton can have the mutt."
"Nice. — Kathy Reichs

He knew why he wanted to kiss her. Because she was beautiful. And before that, because she was kind. And before that, because she was smart and funny. Because she was exactly the right kind of smart and funny. Because he could imagine taking a long trip with her without ever getting bored. Because whenever he saw something new and interesting, or new and ridiculous, he always wondered what she'd have to say about it
how many stars she'd give it and why. — Rainbow Rowell

Kyo Sohma: angrily pointing at Yuki Just like I'll beat you one of these days
Yuki: looking bored Wait wait I think I've heard this one before — Natsuki Takaya

All terrific but the people. THE PEOPLE. Everyone looks so exalted, or so wretched, or so spiffy, so funny, so splendid. If you are ever bored or blue, stand on the street corner for half an hour. — Maira Kalman

Music appeared later. At first I was making people laugh with my funny stories. Live and on TV too. It was great, but I started to think that people will soon get bored from it. I have said to myself: "If you are going to go on being a superstar, you have to sing!" — Verka Serduchka

Just so you know, I get incredibly bored quite easily and you will be forced to be my source of entertainment. You'll kind of be like my own personal jester."
I flipped him off.
"Well that wasn't funny at all. — Jennifer L. Armentrout

Nobody wants to know what I'm doing 24 hours a day, they'd be painfully bored, trust me. At the same time, if I'm doing something interesting or funny, I like being able to share that with my fans. — Josh Duhamel

As a child, one of my defense mechanisms was to try to be funny. My mom tried to nurture that by putting me in acting class. But I got bored when we stopped pretending to be trees and actually had to work. — Ian Gomez

He glanced up once, eyes bored. Please stop talking. I'm trying to eat. — Kate Avery Ellison

He rolled his eyes. " What Claire?"Claire snickered. " Corned-beef again?"Henry narrowed his eyes at her. " I like corned-beef, leave me alone."Claire laughed as he took a big bite of his sandwich while glaring at her. Ethan giggled as he watched the two of them. " What's so funny?" Henry asked Ethan around a mouthful of food, making him giggle some more. " Ew, Henry, that's gross," Claire groaned. Then Henry stopped her heart by winking at her. He freaking winked at her! Who the hell is this guy?! Claire gaped at him, trying to figure out who this person was. Henry rolled his green eyes at her. " What now?" he asked after swallowing his food. " Who are you and what have you done with Henry Beck?" Claire demanded. Henry gave her a bored look, but that couldn't hide the slight blush on his cheeks. " Whatever. — Andria Large

Kyo Sohma: One of these days I'll make you say you're sorry
Yuki Sohma: looking bored I'm sorry.
Kyo Sohma: Dammit That's not what I meant Don't you have any shame
Yuki Sohma: still looking annoyed Yes I'm ashamed to be seen with you shouting in public.
Kyo Sohma: Oh that's it We're taking this outside
Yuki Sohma: still looking annoyed We ARE outside you stupid cat. — Natsuki Takaya

The only thing that matters to me about my stories is that they're entertaining and they're funny. And I tend to get bored easily, so I generally throw something supernatural in. I would say they're humorous novels that have a supernatural bent, but that's as close as you're going to get to fitting them all in the same basket. — Christopher Moore

You're boring me, M'Ordant. Go away." V'Aidan
"You can't be bored." M'Ordant
"And a good thing, too, since I'd no doubt perish from it while in your company." V'Aidan — Sherrilyn Kenyon

If I wanted to be bored by 6,000 pages of unreadable dreck, I'd read War and Peace four times. — Lewis Black

The thing is, some girls think they can actually change guys. And what's funny is that if they actually did change them, they'd get bored. They'd have no challenge left. You just have to give girls some time to think of a new way of doing things, that's all. Some of them will figure it out here. Some later. Some never. I wouldn't worry about it too much. — Stephen Chbosky

The short version is that I started an internet diary a long, long time ago (six years!) because I was bored with my job. I figured I would write a few funny things a few times a week until I had enough material to do stand-up. After two or three weeks, I emailed it to some friends. They emailed it to other friends, and more people started reading. Eventually, I realized that stand-up was scary and it would be much easier to just keep writing this stuff at work. — Jason Mulgrew

Honestly, half the reason I like you is because you're so ... I don't know. You like life." He looked away from my eyes, amused as his thoughts spun, considering. "You're fearless. Bold. Not afraid to enjoy yourself. You just go out there and do what you want. I like the whirlwind you exist in. I envy it. It's funny, really." He smiled. "I used to think I wanted someone exactly like me, but now I think I'd be bored to death with another version of myself. I'm surprised I don't bore you sometimes."
I gaped. "Are you kidding? You're the most interesting person I know. Aside from Hugh maybe. But then, he installs breast implants and buys souls. That's a hard combination to beat. But he's not nearly as cute. — Richelle Mead

When the world began, there were no such things as monsters. Demons were just fallen angels who, booted out of Heaven and bored with Hell, wandered the Earth sticking little girls' pigtails in inkwells and sinking the occasional continent. — Richard Kadrey

No," I agreed. "The zombie apocalypse is still a few years off, right?"
"That's up to you to decide. Tell you what, we'll do it for fun someday when you're really bored. — Cait Reynolds

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving. — Steven Wright

An artist should paint from the heart, and not always what people expect. Predictability often leads to the dullest work, in my opinion, and we have been bored stiff long enough I think. — E.A. Bucchianeri

I am what prevents the Accelerator from being a bomb."
"Except you didn't," said Gracious. "Because you weren't around."
"I got bored."
"You're a machine."
"Machines can become bored, too."
Gracious looked suddenly concerned. "My toaster is bored?"
"Perhaps, " said the Engineer. "I do not know many toasters. — Derek Landy