Humorous Wisdom Quotes & Sayings

You could love someone so strongly, for so long, and still forget - until the memories returned. — Jason Heller

Wisdom of the Ages: "Boxing Day" In the UK, the day after Christmas is named after the first activity that takes place between husband and wife after the Christmas receipts are added up. — Matthew D. Heines

God delights in revealing Himself to you when you are bold enough to bother Him. In fact, I think He would say that the only thing that bothers Him is when you don't come to Him. — David Platt

Never make an important decision with your pants down. — Katie Thayne

Every match in the Euro is a dance on a razor's edge. — Otto Rehhagel

Wisdom of the Ages: "New Year" For a kid, the ultimate source of confusion. They say it's a new year, but after the break, you realize you are still in the same class, with the same lousy people. — Matthew D. Heines

Reach deep into your wallet and buy a decent mule. — Robert Fitterman

There are times when reason does not work, and peaceful efforts prove inadequate. Violence is ultimately the last resort. This is the way it has been. The world will, perhaps, never be any different. — Amish Tripathi

Wisdom of the Ages: Another Bush in the White House-Yep they keep forgetting to grab the TV and silverware. — Matthew D. Heines

It is about time that the religious and environmental faithful joined forces. No one wins when divisive politics pits the right to human life against the sanctity of biodiversity, or family values against ecosystem services. There are infinite compatible reasons to love, cherish and steward Earth. — Alex Bruce

Darkness is necessary for evolvement. — Lailah Gifty Akita

Always take a compliment, even if it's not yours — Benny Bellamacina

I wanted to find my voice, so I sat in silence.
I wanted joy, so I cried my heart open.
I wanted wisdom, so I capered in bodacious foolishness.
I wanted freedom, so I felt my bonds. — Catherine Scott

Special Super Bowl Wisdom of the Ages: "Marshawn Lynch" Not really shy. Still extremely embarrassed he believed you can't be charged for beating up on large groups of people-as long as you are carrying a football. — Matthew D. Heines

Another Chief remembered that since the Great Father promised them that they would never be moved they had been moved five times. "I think you had better put the Indians on wheels," he said sardonically, "and you can run them about whenever you wish. — Dee Brown

The Truth burns the heart like a hammer breaking a rock. — Lailah Gifty Akita

What you know
and don't deny that
you don't know
and knowing this
you know
what and why
you don't know.
Right? — Jennifer Hillman

You can never go back to a specific moment. That's why it's important to live in the present and not the past. Don't let foolish memories get in the way of the makings of new ones. — Emily Coussons

What is your Self? Self is nothing but joy. A joyous person is definitely a person who has got his Self expressing through his joy. Such a person is so joy-giving, so humorous, and never degrading anyone. — Nirmala Srivastava

But the character of the music emphasized the tale as allegory
humorous, poignant, humane allegory
disclosing the metamorphosis of life itself, in which man moves from confident inexperience through the bitterness of experience, toward the rueful wisdom of self-knowledge. — Robertson Davies

A meeting is a collective tacit confession of participants' unwillingness to work. — Pawan Mishra

Actually, watching television and surfing the Internet are really excellent practice for being dead. — Chuck Palahniuk

I don't think you should ever insult people unintentionally: if you're doing it, you ought to mean it. — Neil Gaiman

Blast ignorant people with high-powered streams of information and wisdom, but only when fire hoses are not readily available. — Cassandra Duffy

The wonderful poems interpreting with equal magic the romance of strange lands and times, or the modern soul, naked and unashamed, as if clothed in its own complexity; the humorous-tragic questionings of the universe; the delicious travel-pictures and fantasies; the lucid criticisms of art, and politics, and philosophy, informed with malicious wisdom, shimmering with poetry and wit. — Israel Zangwill

Wisdom of the Ages: "The Nativity" The Son of God was born in a manger-not surprising, have you seen the prices of hotel rooms in Bethlehem? Oy Vay! Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah Peace! — Matthew D. Heines

What I learn today I shall know forever. Whether or not I remember that I know it is a different story. — Richelle E. Goodrich

Beauty is in the behind of the beholder! — Irwin Corey

They were mostly happy, until they weren't. I suppose that's true for most everyone. — Kate Moretti

Our youth are not failing the system; the system is failing our youth. Ironically, the very youth who are being treated the worst are the young people who are going to lead us out of this nightmare. — Rachel Jackson

Color" is skin-deep and not soul-deep. Quit making it soul-deep. All souls are mine saith the Lord. As the soul of the father, so also the soul of the son is His. What matters is that, the soul who sins is the one who will die (ref. Ez. 18:4) — Josephine Akhagbeme

...life's about accumulating wrinkles, deep as rivers and as wide as is needed to travel along their path, so that by the time you're ready to die, your life can be read. — Liam Howley

Julesa: "Are you a fool? Father will have you hung if he realises you've escaped."
Never: "Everyone dies from something. — Ashley Capes

Discipline allows magic. To be a writer is to be the very best of assassins. You do not sit down and write every day to force the Muse to show up. You get into the habit of writing every day so that when she shows up, you have the maximum chance of catching her, bashing her on the head, and squeezing every last drop out of that bitch. — Lili St. Crow

You got it all wrong in your way of thinking. — Lailah Gifty Akita