Heifer Quotes & Sayings

Little thinks, in the field, yon red-cloaked clown, Of thee, from the hill-top looking down; And the heifer, that lows in the upland farm, Far-heard, lows not thine ear to charm; The sexton tolling the bell at noon, Dreams not that great Napoleon Sto — Ralph Waldo Emerson

Give a bull grass, sweet water and a willing heifer and he is happy. But a man is never content. If no gadflies of worry exist he will invent them. — Alison Fell

I am an animal, a lion, I live in a certain country, I have just been hunting, they would have me share my prey with a heifer, a cow and a goat; but being the stronger, I award myself all the shares for various reasons, the last of which is quite simply that my name is lion — Anonymous

Tufts of hair stuck out of my head in all directions, like I'd been cow-licked by a drunken heifer. — Allen Eskens

Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns — Groucho Marx

Minds me of a story they tell about Willy Feeley when he was a young fella. Willy was bashful, awful bashful. Well, one day he takes a heifer over to Graves' bull. Ever'body was out but Elsie Graves, and Elsie wasn't bashful at all. Willy, he stood there turnin' red an' he couldn't even talk. Elsie says, 'I know what you come for; the bull's out in back a the barn.' Well, they took the heifer out there an' Willy an' Elsie sat on the fence to watch. Purty soon Willy got feelin' purty fly. Elsie looks over an' says, like she don't know, 'What's a matter, Willy?' Willy's so randy, he can't hardly set still. 'By God,' he says, 'by God, I wisht I was a-doin' that!' Elsie says, 'Why not, WIlly? It's your heifer. — John Steinbeck

He knows she's his daughter, twit. (Artemis)
Twit? Moi? The Simi? Why, I do believe the bitch-goddess has done gone and gotten herself confused. She thinks she's me, not that I blame her. All women want to be me because of my beautoneousness and the fact that I have such stylish clothing and sparklies. But believe me, I ain't no heifer-goddess. (Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Uh huh, you sure can, Mr. Man," the heftier girl said smacking her lips. She expressively started to wave her long fingernail in his face. "You that actor that is fucking Lailiana ain't you." "Ethiopia! How you gonna ask the man who he fucking?" "Shit, why can't I? That's what he doing! That's what I heard he doing. He grown. He can answer for himself." First of all, who the hell does shit like that? Secondly, did she just say that the big tittied heifer's name is Ethiopia? — Will Blue

Why's my name the Large Professor?
Cause I milked your cow, in other words I hit your heifer. — Extra P

Oh, poo, we can't let the heifer-goddess die. Akri will die too if he can't eat from her. C'mon, Xirena, you gots to help the Simi protect the bitch-goddess. (Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Oh, poo," Simi said petulantly, "we can't let the heifer-goddess die. Akri will die too if he can't eat from her." Her eyes flaming, she put herself between Artemis and the tomb. "C'mon, Xirena, you gots to help the Simi protect the bitch-goddess." Xirena — Sherrilyn Kenyon

See ... I knew baby Marissa was quality people, look how she's eating the head off the red-headed Artemis doll. Simi need to teach her to belch fire, then introduce her to the real heifer-Goddess herself(Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Who finds the heifer dead and bleeding fresh And sees fast-by a butcher with an axe, But will suspect 'twas he that made the slaughter? — William Shakespeare

It was long before I got at the maxim, that in reading an old mathematician you will not read his riddle unless you plough with his heifer; you must see with his light, if you want to know how much he saw. — Augustus De Morgan

Little kid comes in late ta school. Teacher says, "Why ya late?" Kid says, "Had a take a heifer down - get 'er bred." Teacher says, "Couldn't your ol' man do it?" Kid says, "Sure he could, but not as good as the bull. — John Steinbeck

Simi? You got some free time? (Kat)
Of course I do. You know akri on Olympus with that heifer-goddess I want to eat, but he won't let the Simi have no dinner. So why you calling me, little akra-kitty? (Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I don't have to do nothing you say, you old heifer cow. And you are old. Really, really old. And a cow, too. (Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

He sad enough already because he has to deal with that bitch-goddess with the red hair. (Simi)
Simi! (Kat)
Well, she is a bitch-goddess. I know you love her, akra-Kat, but facts is fact and she a mean heifer. (Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I'm talking to a guy who says he was taken up in a flying saucer and had sexual experiments done on him - which, I got to say, is probably the only sexual experiments he's ever had done on him, that didn't involve a heifer. — John Sandford

When I was a kid my ol' man give me a haltered heifer an' says take her down an git her serviced. An' the fella says, I done it, an' ever' time since then when I hear a business man talkin' about service, I wonder who's gettin' screwed. — John Steinbeck

Heifer, you are not Olivia Pope. — K. Alex Walker

April is the two-week-old kitten, the month-old lamb, the six-month-old heifer, the two-year-old girl. Too young to know it has either past or future, it wears the ribbon of the fleeting present as part of itself ... — Gladys Hasty Carroll

Heifer."
"Rich man's whore!"
"At least mine can cook the food he eats. And replaces it, too."
"Now see, Dee-Ann Smith. That was just mean! — Shelly Laurenston

As part of my Christmas present I'd be giving chickens to a family in Nepal through the Heifer Foundation. I think they expanded my world when I was young to know sort of the other issues that were going on globally. — Serinda Swan

With the help of folks like you and me, Heifer International tackles the problem of hunger one family at a time with gifts of renewable resources - farm animals that are ongoing sources of food and income. — Susan Sarandon