Gay Closet Quotes & Sayings

Brokeback Mountain is a sad love story about two people who can't be together, and the reason that they can't be together is because being gay is a stigmatized thing. It would be interesting to have the same movie in which the two guys weren't in the closet and there was no shame about them being gay and they couldn't be together for other reasons. I still feel like we're a long way from that happening. — Wesley Morris

You can't pray away the gay, but you can torture a conflicted closet-case to death. — Dan Savage

Mary Martin was Broadway's biggest closet king. Everyone thought Ethel (Merman) was butch and maybe a lesbian, but she wasn't. And everyone thought that lovely little Mary was Miss Femme, and she was
except next to her gay husband. In other words, don't judge a star by her cover. — Bob Fosse

Then maybe it's time to change that." Della sat back in her chair.
"Change what?" Kylie asked.
"Come out of the closet. You know, like ... 'I'm gay and here to stay.' You'd need a different slogan, but maybe, 'I'm a lizard and if you don't like it, I'll eat out your gizzard.'" Della chuckled. "Okay, it needs some work, but you get what I mean. — C.C. Hunter

I am not in the closet. I am not coming out of the closet. I am not gay. — Oprah Winfrey

It was difficult being a teacher and out of the closet in the '50s. By the time I retired, the English department was proud of having a gay poet of a certain minor fame. It was a very satisfactory change! — Thom Gunn

I don't get it, if there was a closet full of gay guys, then why would any of them want to "come out of the closet? — Chris Crocker

Yoshino distinguishes covering from "conversion" (trying to become straight) and "passing" (staying in the closet), and points out that even after gay people come out, society exerts a "covering demand" on its minority members. I would argue that, by pleading for more magnanimous treatment of our opponents, gay thought leaders were unconsciously applying the covering demand to the LGBT equality movement as a whole. — Michelangelo Signorile

I formulated a theory about him being a closet fundamentalist with a deep-seated guilt about being gay. — Fabian Black

Make no mistake, hiding one's true self away in a closet and creating a facade of heterosexuality is not without its consequences. It may appear to have a degree of safety but from my experience they are very unhealthy places and do all kinds of terrible things to individuals psychologically, emotionally and behaviourally ... to say nothing of projection. The damage of the fear, shame, guilt and self-loathing that exist inside a closet are often reflected unknowingly in the external life of the individual. In or out of the closet; there is a price to pay. Each individual must weigh up the consequences of honesty, openness, secrecy and deception for themselves. Coming out, for most of us, is like an exorcism that releases us of the darkness we have lived in for years and caused us to believe awful things about ourselves. On the other side of the looking glass are freedom, light and life. — Anthony Venn-Brown

I think dragging someone out of the closet who isn't necessarily engaged in anti-gay activities can have a destructive effect on them and on us. I don't want unwilling gay people advocating on my behalf; I think that's a challenge. — Christopher Rice

It was the first time I'd ever considered that gay might not just be about whom we slept with but a kind of sensibility, what survived of feeling after all the fears and evasions of the closet. — Paul Monette

At Chadham High, the safest place to be gay was in the closet. — Huston Piner

A review of 850 research papers concluded that people with religious involvement and belief system have better mental health outcomes. They have higher levels of psychological well-being such as life satisfaction, happiness, positive effect, and higher morale and less depression and suicide. If however you are gay or lesbian (in the closet or your sexuality/belief system unresolved) ... ... .. it is the exact opposite ... .it can drive you crazy or kill you (suicide). Also it should be noted that this research has shown that the very places where Christian young people should feel safest (in their churches, Christian homes, schools and with friends) are actually places of harm. — Anthony Venn-Brown

If you are in the closet and fall in love with someone of the same gender, it doesn't automatically remove the shame and fear that's kept you locked away. The love you are experiencing encourages you to face the reality that this is who you really are and also has the power to set you free. The richness, beauty and depths of love can only be fully experienced in a climate of complete openness, honesty and vulnerability. Love, the most powerful of human emotions, is calling you to freedom and wholeness. — Anthony Venn-Brown

The gay community just recognizes what their closets are and we straight have to spend years trying to figure out which closet we are trapped in. — Judith Light

I had to face the fact that I had been using my gay friends as props. They were always supposed to be funny and entertain me and praise me and listen to my problems, and their life was supposed to be a secret that no one wanted to hear about. I wanted them to stay in the half closet. — Tina Fey

Any man who isn't married by thirty-five is either gay or he's got skeletons in his closet. — Lisa Renee Jones

It is astonishingly satisfying to look at him and think Closet Case, and know he can read my mind as he looks away flushed. All Mormons are gay, I believe. Rick is merely a further example. — Augusten Burroughs

The most important political step that any gay man or lesbian can take is to come out of the closet. It's been proven that it is easier to hate us and to fear us if you can't see us. — Amanda Bearse

Coming out for gay people is a process, not a one-time event. Some days you feel free, open, and ready to piss on the world if they care what you do in bed. On other days, even if you've been out to yourself and others, you're ready to hide in the darkest closet - because sometimes it is safer, easier, and more secure to hide. — Mark Richard Zubro

From the standpoint of integrity, I think we all need to own up to our dirty little secrets. I believe that when we are open about our own strange desires or unusual lives, it paves the way for others to do the same.

In the past thirty years, gay men and lesbians took a lot of flack to tell the truth about their love lives and their courage opened the door for a mass migration out of the closet. We're now at a moment in time when unconventional families (even thirty-year triads and gay couples) are losing their children in custody battles because their families don't conform to mainstream ideas about what a family should be.

Given this context, I want to be someone who stands up for my choices even if they're unpopular, even if I get snickers at cocktail parties. — Victoria Vantoch

Over the past thirty-five years, untold numbers of gay Christians have turned from God in their "failure" and "inability to please God," who, they were told, could not accept them as a gay person. Some felt so rejected and depressed that they turned to self-destructive behaviors, including suicide; some went deep in the closet to try to fit in at church; some became vehemently opposed to all things religious; some decided to seek God in other religions, or no religion; and very few individuals were able to find a church community in which they could worship and serve God without being rejected. — Kathy Baldock

Gay marriage has jumped out of the closet on to the front page. Everyone from the president of the U.S. to retired four-star general Colin Powell is embracing the issue, now supported by most Americans. Still, a few people, like former First Lady Laura Bush appear to be conflicted. — Kitty Kelley

I was horrified when Richard Chamberlain and Rupert Everett said gay actors should stay in the closet. They were saying to people that they should live a lie and not be liberated, to live in fear of being found out. — Alan Cumming

Once," Fran says, settling against the worktable, folding her arms, "I knew this kid who very bravely and bossily came out of the closet when she was only fourteen years old. She told me then that we can't choose who we love. We just love the people we love, no mattter what anyone else might want for us. Wasn't that you? — Madeleine George

I was raised in a household where being gay was like, the most normal thing. My brother is gay, all of my best friends are gay. When my brother came out of the closet, it wasn't a big deal for my family. — Ariana Grande

The emails and the tweets and the Facebook posts and the fan mail that we get from young people all over America that are on the football team or on the hockey team are so touching. They tell me, 'Hey, this is me. I still have to remain in the closet, but your role in '90210' makes me feel better the way being gay is being portrayed.' — Trevor Donovan

I'd like to make it clear from the start that I am gay, gay,
gay. Like, when I come out of the closet, I'm usually wearing
my sister's prom dress kind of gay. — Gwen Hayes

The single best thing about coming out of the closet is that nobody can insult you by telling you what you've just told them. — Rachel Maddow

I was a closet straight. I think I wanted to be gay because I thought it was arty and interesting. And also, I was phenomenally shy with girls. — Rupert Graves

The priesthood in many ways is the ultimate closet in Western civilization, where gay people particularly have hidden for the past two thousand years. — John Shelby Spong

I think that sometimes the whole larger-than-life gay thing is just another kind of closet. It's easier to be different if you're very different, if you go all-out on purpose. Because that way you can still hide who you really are. — Lili Wilkinson

Everyone knows if a Republican comes out of the closet and sees a gay shadow, it means six more years of a Democratic administration. — Jon Stewart

Atheists are the new gays; in the closet and pretty much disqualified from public office. — Richard Dawkins

She thought of people she had seen holding hands in movies, and why shouldn't she and Carol? — Patricia Highsmith

If a bullet should enter my brain, let that bullet destroy every closet door. — Harvey Milk

I would never advise anyone to stay in the closet to further their careers - I'm sure it leads to big fat gay ulcers. There are actors I know who won't come out, and I can see it crippling them as human beings. It's a great shame that people can't be who they are in the 21st century, and people won't let them be who they are. — Ben Daniels

Burst down those closet doors once and for all, and stand up and start to fight. — Harvey Milk

I think the gay community, as a whole, is slighted by high-profile figures who remain in the closet. But I think that a lot of times we need to ask ourselves what that person's role in our community would be if they were out of the closet. — Christopher Rice

But thats their image of us so we stay tense, holding our breath, hoping we wont be found out. - about being gay from the film Love My Life — Ebine Yamaji

I'm a supporter of gay rights. And not a closet supporter either. From the time I was a kid, I have never been able to understand attacks upon the gay community. There are so many qualities that make up a human being ... by the time I get through with all the things that I really admire about people, what they do with their private parts is probably so low on the list that it is irrelevant. — Paul Newman

Forget 'pray the gay away.' I you're more turned on by an AR-15 than a pair of tits, time for some serious therapy. Time for all you gun-humpers to come out of the closet. Is this really about the 2nd Amendment and self-defense
or just a pathetic fetish for guys with tiny pee-pees? — Quentin R. Bufogle

If public figures came out of the closet, then the LGBT kids who saw them on TV would feel safe before they even knew why they felt dangerous. Maybe if enough people came out of the closet, gay kids would never feel dangerous. Maybe we could have a world where we could all just live. We may not all agree, but why can't we just all live? — Margaret Cho

As a teenager, I had to struggle alone to learn about myself and what it meant to be gay. Now for [48] years I've had the satisfaction of working with other gay people all across the country to get the bigots off our backs, to oil the closet door hinges, to change prejudiced hearts and minds, and to show that gay love is good for us and for the rest of the world too. It's hard work
but it's vital, and it's gratifying, and it's often fun! — Barbara Gittings

It's Miranda who speaks up. "You're gay," she says, with complete seriousness. "And I love you. — David Levithan

It's important for closet gay athletes everywhere, not just at the professional level, but more importantly athletes at the younger level in high school and college, to understand they do have support around them and that they can come out and feel comfortable. And honestly, that is going to help save lives. — Scott Fujita

There are those from religious backgrounds who resist and oppose LGBT equality; some very obsessively and publicly. They make bold accusations and negative statements about gay and lesbian people, their supposed "lifestyle" and relationships. But when a son, daughter, brother, sister or close friend comes out it is no longer an "issue" it becomes a person. They realise everything they'd said was painfully targeted at someone they love. Then ... everything changes. — Anthony Venn-Brown

Anderson Cooper has a job to do. And that job is to try to reinforce his credibility in the gay community after the fact that you couldn't get him out of the closet for 10 years with a canister of tear gas. Now he's the sheriff; now he's running around writing everybody a ticket! — Alec Baldwin

You're gay," wash stated.
Rhodes nodded, a short jerk of his head, dropping his gaze to his beer.
"As in, you-like-men gay."
Still eying his beer, Rhodes gave an affirmative shrug.
"As in, you like-to-fuck-men gay."
"Yes! — Katie Allen

I think I started out okay but with AIDS came a great deal of silence about gayness and this period of lose and morning, but at the same time a kind of feeling like you wanted to get back into the closet because being gay was such a terrible thing at that point. — Margaret Cho

I've had enough of being a gay icon! I've had enough of all this hard work, because, since I came out, I keep getting all these parts, and my career's taken off. I want a quiet life. I'm going back into the closet. But I can't get back into the closet, because it's absolutely jam-packed full of other actors. — Ian McKellen

When I see young men and old women come out of the closet and face being called faggots and dykes and pariahs and betrayers of the family dream, then I am honored to be gay because I belong to a people who are proud. — Arnie Kantrowitz

Remember that I was out of the closet at the age of sixteen. My parents knew I was gay; I'd had to tell them. — Boy George

I am not gay, but if I were, I would be the first one running out of the closet. — Dolly Parton

Midlife dynamically, for both straight and gay males, is often challenging as we face the reality that many of the dreams we had for our lives might not become a reality and unresolved conflicts come to the surface. For us to successfully transition in to the next phase of our lives we must find reconciliation of these issues. And for the gay male there is a sense that the gay self we have tried to keep in the closet or so many years begins to scream out. "Time is running out. When do I get to live?" You can't ignore that voice in the end, you can try and suppress it, and you can try and deny it, you can try and silence it by filling your life with other noises and diverting attention ... but that voice still exists. "Will my entire life be a lie? — Anthony Venn-Brown

- Do they know? That you're gay?
- Why waste their time with it? It's not like it'll ever be an issue anyway.
- Yeah, but, it's who you are, right?
- I guess so, - he said. - I don't really know how to be any way else.
- When did you know?
- I was twelve, maybe. Something I just knew one day, even though I hadn't known it the day before.
- So it's like that, huh? A feeling? Not just being into other dudes?
- Oh no, it's that too. Of course it's that. But it's more, I think. Not so much a feeling as a fact, like having blue eyes or brown hair. It's just maybe something you don't discover until you're ready to understand it better.
- Like being straight, - she said. Only we don't have to deal with all that closet bullshit.
- Bingo, - he said. — John Corey Whaley

If I was gay, there would be no closet. You would never see the closet I came out of. Why? Because I'd have burned it for kindling by the time I was twelve ... If I was gay, at this stage of the game?age 37, aging alternative icon?I'd be taking out ads. — Henry Rollins