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Funny Teenage Quotes & Sayings

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Top Funny Teenage Quotes

Funny Teenage Quotes By Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

Sexually active? Sexually active? Patrick and I hadn't even learned the fine points of kissing yet!
I marched on down. 'For your information,' I said from the doorway, as both Dad and Lester jerked to attention, 'I am about as sexually active as a bag of spinach, and if you want to keep me on the porch and not out in the park somewhere behind the bushes, you'll keep the stupid porch light off when I come home with a boy. — Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

Funny Teenage Quotes By Gena Showalter

I'm not trying to - What do teenagers say nowadays?" he asked my grandmother."Get all up in her biznez," Nana said.Without cracking a smile."That's right," he replied. "We're not trying to get all up in your biznez, Ali. — Gena Showalter

Funny Teenage Quotes By Sheri Meshal

She moved in for a better look.It was a portrait of Bob Marley,a pretty good one,actually.No Woman, No Cry ... that's right.No teenage girls either.All right,ten points if you'Re a poet,minus twenty-five if you're in a band and minus fifty if you're into the ganja. — Sheri Meshal

Funny Teenage Quotes By J. Lynn

Sleep just go to sleep.
Cam lived across the hall?
You need to get up early. Go to sleep.
How in the world was that possible? He was everywhere I went.
Go to sleep.
And why did he have a pet turtle and did he seriously name it after the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, because that was kind of funny.
Morning's going to come soon.
Did he only wear a shirt during class? Oh my God, he seriously lived across the hall. Jacob was going to flip ... and probably move in. That would be fun. I really liked Jacob, but I had a feeling he'd borrow my clothes.
Go the fuck to sleep. — J. Lynn

Funny Teenage Quotes By Mark Leiren-Young

Like all great adventures, this one started with someone trying to get laid. King Menelaus didn't go to Troy for the baklava. — Mark Leiren-Young

Funny Teenage Quotes By Kathleen Jeffrie Johnson

I wish kids at school would quit calling me a porno dork-face, though. There wasn't any sex involved! I got knocked out, I panicked and called the cops. Okay, somewhere along the line everybody's clothes fell off, but that's not exactly a federal crime. Is it? I hope you don't work for the FBI. (You don't, do you?)
- Email Excerpt (Page: 21)
From: Douglas Bracken
To: Dr. Rita I. Milton
Sent: Friday, November 08 - 5:05 PM
Subject: Pressing Concerns — Kathleen Jeffrie Johnson

Funny Teenage Quotes By John Goode

That's the funny thing about cars and teenage boys. They never mean to hurt you when they crash, they just do. — John Goode

Funny Teenage Quotes By Jodie B. Cooper

Katie purred in pleasure as she licked the beating vein in Jared's neck. — Jodie B. Cooper

Funny Teenage Quotes By Rucy Ban

Mom lies down next to me and we both stare at the ceiling in complete silence. "Boys are like candy," she suddenly says. I grin. "Really, Mom? That's your advice? Boys are like candy. What is that? Forrest Gump on teens? — Rucy Ban

Funny Teenage Quotes By Teresa Toten

There were also times when they didn't kiss and roam nonstop. The in-between times. That's when they just held each other and whispered. Marnie, of course, heard it all. Adam would try to make Robyn laugh, and she would, whether it was funny or not. She would tease him and he would tell her what it was like before. And they talked about what it would be like after. It was as if they were two normal kids in love, sitting on a sofa in a warm living room, telling each other almost everything and sorting out the world with someone's mom puttering annoyingly in the background. Except, of course, they weren't two normal kids. Would never be. — Teresa Toten

Funny Teenage Quotes By G.G. Silverman

Even as zombies, ridiculous prom gowns were the downfall of teenage girls, crippling them at the knees. — G.G. Silverman

Funny Teenage Quotes By Celia Rivenbark

I think it would be funny to have one of those family decals showing a really skinny teenage girl barfing into a little chalk-outline bag (the bulimic in the family) or the dad figure dressed in the woman's underwear that he truly enjoys slipping into when no one's looking. Or the wife figure smiling with her exaggerated curly hair and tennis skirt, clutching a racket in one hand and a bottle of Stoli' in the other. — Celia Rivenbark

Funny Teenage Quotes By Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

Do we have a hand mirror?' I asked from the kitchen doorway.
'Never use one,' said Lester, examining the date on a carton of sour cream.
'Naturally, you're a male. What you see is what you've got,' I said resentfully.
'Huh?' said Lester. — Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

Funny Teenage Quotes By Rebecca McNutt

... MOM!" Martha finally screamed. "Mom, you've got to see these!"
"Is it about Hermione?" She exclaimed, rushing into the middle of the room. Her mouth dropped open in horror when she noticed Hermione's walls.
"I can't find any ... polite ... photos of her, mom."
"Why are there ones of her eating out of dumpsters and giving seniors the finger?"
"No idea," Martha replied.
"Oh god ... I'll get one out of my wallet," Her mom decided, hurrying out of the room frantically.
... It's funny how when one thing happens, it can make you forget about something else. — Rebecca McNutt

Funny Teenage Quotes By Rob Thomas

It's funny: I always, as a high school teacher and particularly as a high school yearbook teacher, because yearbook staffs are 90 percent female, I got to sit in and overhear teenage girl talk for many years. I like teenage girls; I like their drama, their foibles. And I think, 'I'll be good with a teenage daughter!' — Rob Thomas

Funny Teenage Quotes By Stacey Jay

Real teenage boys aren't like characters in the books you read. They smell funny and are obsessed with video games and say dumb things. They're still learning, just like you. — Stacey Jay

Funny Teenage Quotes By Dan Wells

It may surprise you to know this, but there are children
some of them teenage boys, just like you
who actually carry on open, honest conversations with their mothers."
"I find it very hard to believe that there are other teenage boys just like me." I finished my cereal and stood up. "I also find it a little terrifying. — Dan Wells

Funny Teenage Quotes By Heather Graham

Yeah, 'Feed the Dog' is just a really fun, teenage movie with Nat Wolff and Selena Gomez and all these other great people. It's just so silly-funny, and my character's super-fun. — Heather Graham

Funny Teenage Quotes By Jaime Pressly

I don't know anybody that has a teenage son or daughter who at some point hasn't been like, 'God, I hate them' just under their breath. It's not meant to be literal. It's funny. — Jaime Pressly

Funny Teenage Quotes By Sarah Dessen

And so really, you have given me no choice but to take you shopping by
force." She sighed, then reached up, dropping her sunglasses down from
their perch on her head to cover her eyes. "Do you even realize how happy
the average teenage girl would be in your shoes? I have a credit card. We're
at the mall. I want to buy you things. It's like adolescent nirvana."
- Cora — Sarah Dessen

Funny Teenage Quotes By Anna Carey

What are you doing with all these books?" I asked, stepping towards a tall stack on the floor. I ran my fingers down the spines, recognizing a few familiar titles from School: Heart of Darkness, The Great Gatsby, and To the Lighthouse.
Caleb came beside me, his warm shoulder brushing against mine. "I do this funny thing sometimes," she said, shooting me a mischievous grin. "I open a book, and I look at each page. It's called reading — Anna Carey

Funny Teenage Quotes By John Bishop

On his teenage son: To be honest, I'm not sure the same kid comes home each night. — John Bishop

Funny Teenage Quotes By Cassandra Clare

And now," Eric yelled into his mircophone, "we're going to sing a new song-one we just wrote. This one's for my girlfriend. We've been going out for three weeks, and, damn, our love is true. We're gonna be together forever, baby. This one's called 'Bang You Like a Drum. — Cassandra Clare

Funny Teenage Quotes By Sarah Strohmeyer

In fiction, I searched for my favorite authors, women I have trusted to reassure me than not all teenage guys are total ditwads, that the archetype of the noble cute hero who devotes himself to the girl he loves has not gone the way of the rotary phone. That all I had to do was be myself (smart, hardworking, funny) and be patient and kind and he and I would find each other.
As Bea would say, this why they call it fiction. — Sarah Strohmeyer

Funny Teenage Quotes By Stephen Fry

I have written it before and am not ashamed to write it again. Without Wodehouse I am not sure that I would be a tenth of what I am today
whatever that may be. In my teenage years, his writings awoke me to the possibilities of language. His rhythms, tropes, tricks and mannerisms are deep within me.
But more than that, he taught me something about good nature. It is enough to be benign, to be gentle, to be funny, to be kind. — Stephen Fry

Funny Teenage Quotes By Lizzy Ford

Matilda shook her head. "Damn teens and hormones. At least you own up to it. Amber doesn't believe me when I tell her half the kids here are sexually active.""More than half," Decker said, smiling.
-dark summer — Lizzy Ford

Funny Teenage Quotes By Bruce Sterling

I hate watching people blow all operational security, and spew their guts like a teenage burglar, drunk in a bar. We're professionals, for Christ's sake, and she's just a prole. — Bruce Sterling

Funny Teenage Quotes By Jacquelyn Nicole Davis

I DON'T KNOW! I HAVE NO FREAKIN' IDEA. I'M ONLY FIFTEEN. I want my mom. — Jacquelyn Nicole Davis