Funny Slam Quotes & Sayings

Always walk towards open doors. And if they slam shut in your face, kick that sucker in and keep going. — Richard Gere

Parker's grand slam is the same as going 4 for 4, even though he went 1 for 4. — Jerry Coleman

Boy, you knock on the devil's door and he will head slam you through the wall. — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Funny how possibility can lift you. Funny how reality can slam you down. — Cat Patrick

The human body is a funny machine. When you want to move something - say, your arm - the brain actually sends two signals at the same time: "More power!" and "Less power!" The operating system that runs the body automatically holds some power back to avoid overexerting and tearing itself apart. Not all machines have that built - in safety feature. You can point a car at a wall, slam the accelerator to the floor, and the car will crush itself against the wall until the engine is destroyed or runs out of gas.
Martial arts use every scrap of strength the body has at its disposal. In martial arts training, you punch and shout at the same time. Your "Shout louder!" command helps to override the "Less power!" command. With practice, you can throttle the amount of power your body holds back. In essence, you're learning to channel
the body's power to destroy itself. — Hiroshi Sakurazaka

Sometimes I get drunk and I get into arguments with taxi drivers. And I get out the cab and I slam the door. That's not the way to win an argument with a taxi driver. The way to win is you get out of the cab and you leave the door open. And then he has to step out and come around and close that door. And while he's doing that, I'm on the other side opening the other doors-and we just go around and around and around, and I got my own Benny Hill situation going on in life. — Hannibal Buress

Kyria Abrahams, former teen bride of a doomsday cult and seeker of salvation in slam poetry, tells the terribly funny story of her improbable life with candor, wit, and an unsparing eye for the perfect detail. Brilliant. — Janice Erlbaum

He checked out his surrounding. More books. A drinking fountain. A poster showing a guy slam-dunking a basketball with one hand and holding a book in the other, urging kids to READ! Weird, thought Steve. How can he even see the hoop?
...
You see, Steven, Librarians are the most elite, best trained secret force in the United States of America. Probably in the world."
"No way."
"Yes way."
"What about the FBI?"
"Featherweights."
"The CIA?"
Mackintosh snorted. "Don't make me laugh. Those guys can't even dunk a basketball andd read a book at the same time. — Mac Barnett