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Funny Miss You Quotes & Sayings

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Top Funny Miss You Quotes

Funny Miss You Quotes By Josh Stern

You always miss 100% of the shots you don't order — Josh Stern

Funny Miss You Quotes By Cilla Black

I do not miss ITV, God no! Have you seen ITV lately? — Cilla Black

Funny Miss You Quotes By Danielle Paige

The despicable crone known as Mombi stands accused of high witchery, gross dishonesty, untold crimes against monkeys, outrageous trespassing, and general unpleasantness. Also, she is extremely unattractive. Miss Amy, do you speak for the witch? — Danielle Paige

Funny Miss You Quotes By John Flanagan

Butterfly?" Will said. "Why Butterfly?"
"I believe it's a term of great respect," Selethen said gravely. He was very obviously not laughing. Too obviously, Will thought.
"It's all right for you," he said. "They called you 'Hawk.' Hawk is an excellent name. It's warlike and noble. But ... Butterfly?
Selethen nodded. "I agree that Hawk is an entirely suitable name. I assume it had to do with my courage and nobility of heart.
Halt coughed and the Arridi lord looked at him, eyebrows raised.
"I think it referred less to your heart and more to another part of your body," Halt said mildly. He tapped his finger meaningfully along the side of his nose. It was a gesture he'd always wanted an opportunity to use, and this one was to good to miss. Selethen sniffed and turned away, affecting not to notice. — John Flanagan

Funny Miss You Quotes By Mitch Hedberg

I miss the $2 bill, 'cause I can break a two. $20, no. $10, no. $5, maybe, $2? Oh yeah. What do you need, a one and another one? — Mitch Hedberg

Funny Miss You Quotes By Roald Dahl

There aren't many funny bits in Mr Tolkien either,' Matilda said.
'Do you think that all children's books ought to have funny bits in them?' Miss Honey asked.
'I do,' Matilda said. 'Children are not so serious as grown-ups and love to laugh. — Roald Dahl

Funny Miss You Quotes By Martha Stewart

This is a funny story. We'd asked the guards every day for cappuccino. You know, just as a joke. And they'd come in with their cups of coffee and stuff. And so I get here and I have a spot for a cappuccino machine, and it didn't work. So I don't have any cappuccino ... I didn't miss the cappuccino, I missed the idea of cappuccino. — Martha Stewart

Funny Miss You Quotes By LeeAnn Whitaker

Hello Miss," I said in a feverish manner. "I'm Jack, and of course I will muck out your horse for you." I grinned a huge dumb smile right at her. "I'm always happy to help."

She was taken aback, gazing at me confused. She wasn't sure if I was being sarcastic, or if I was just some village simpleton who always said too much. — LeeAnn Whitaker

Funny Miss You Quotes By Mary Balogh

But marriage is forever.'
'Oh, not really,' he assured her. 'Only until one of us dies.'
Her eyes widened. 'I do not want you to die,' she said.
'Perhaps you will go first,' he said, though I rather think I hope not. I would probably have grown accustomed to you by then and would miss you. — Mary Balogh

Funny Miss You Quotes By Laurie R. King

Tell me about yourself, Miss Russel."
I started to give him the obligatory response, first the demurral and then the reluctant flat autobiography, but some slight air of polite inattention in his manner stopped me. Instead, I found myself grinning at him.
"Why don't you tell me about myself, Mr. Holmes? — Laurie R. King

Funny Miss You Quotes By V.C. Andrews

It's funny how when you're little, you miss all the little lies. They float right past you, but you don't wonder about them much. For a long time, you think this is just something adults still do after being kids - pretend. Then one day you wake up and realize most of the world you're in is built on someone's make-believe. — V.C. Andrews

Funny Miss You Quotes By Sherrilyn Kenyon

Sadly for you, I think I'm going to live, Simi. You can stop slapping me now. I've already lost enough sense. Can't afford to lose any more brain cells. I really really need my last three before I forget how to spell my name. It's hard enough to pronounce." Nick
"well, poo. Not poo that you'll live, 'cause the Simi would probably miss you if you died, but poo that I'll miss all that good old salty boy meat. Though we needs be fatting you up some to make you really good eats. Hmmm." Simi — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Funny Miss You Quotes By Lisa Kleypas

Christopher felt a smile -his first genuine smile in a long time- pulling at his lips. "Does Miss Hathaway have many suitors?"
"Oh, yes. But none of them want to marry her."
"Why is that, do you imagine?"
"They don't want to get shot," the child said, shrugging.
"Pardon?" Christopher's brows lifted.
"Before you marry, you have to get shot by an arrow and fall in love," the boy explained. — Lisa Kleypas

Funny Miss You Quotes By Seal

The music industry is really funny, when you have a hit record, everyone knows who are you, everyone wants to do duets with you, then if you have a miss, people suffer from amnesia. — Seal

Funny Miss You Quotes By Linda Winfree

Are you still running that bar?" Maureen's voice dropped to a shocked whisper on the last word and Hope rolled her eyes, working the pick through Maureen's thick hair.

"The Cue Club? Yes, ma'am, I am." Angel leaned forward with her best devilish wink. "But I'm thinking of changing the name to the Den of Iniquity and getting some exotic dancers. You know, strippers."

Miss Maureen's eyes widened, pencil-thin brows nearly reaching the salt and pepper curls falling onto her forehead. — Linda Winfree

Funny Miss You Quotes By John C. Wright

She said, "Look me right in the eye, and tell me you don't love me, and I'll go."
He stared at her. "Miss, I do not love you."
"Don't give me that rot! I'm coming with you, and that's final!"
"Daphne, you just said that if I said ... "
"That doesn't count! I said look me right in the eye! You were staring at my nose! — John C. Wright

Funny Miss You Quotes By Sophie Jordan

Let's go. I don't want to keep you from the things you have to do ... like plan the next crime wave with your biker gang."
"Sure. And you don't want to miss your nail appointment."
I cocked my head. "That's tomorrow. — Sophie Jordan

Funny Miss You Quotes By Julia Quinn

And you, Lord Bridgerton," she replied in a tone that could have frozen champagne, "are almost as handsome as your brother."
Colin snorted again, only this time it sounded as if he were being strangled.
"Are you all right?" Miss Sheffield asked.
"He's fine," Anthony barked.
She ignored him, keeping her attention on Colin. "Are you certain?"
Colin nodded furiously. 'Tickle in my throat."
"Or perhaps a guilty conscience?" Anthony suggested.
Colin turned deliberately from his brother to Kate. "I think I might need another glass of lemonade," he gasped.
"Or maybe," said Anthony, "something stronger. Hemlock, perhaps? — Julia Quinn

Funny Miss You Quotes By Richelle Mead

You should make her call you 'Miss Georgina,'" added Hugh with a mocking southern drawl. "Or at least 'ma'am.'"
Niphon's presence and Jerome's lecture had put me in a grouchy mood. "I'm not doing any mentoring. She's so gungho to take on the world's male population, she doesn't even need me."
The three men exchanged more smirks. Cody made some hissing and meowing sounds, scratching at the air.
"This isn't funny," I said.
"Sure it is," said Cody. — Richelle Mead

Funny Miss You Quotes By Cora Carmack

It's a funny thing to miss people before you've even left them, but that's what I was feeling now. — Cora Carmack

Funny Miss You Quotes By Karen E. Olson

I shook my head. "Not Interested" I said.
he straightened up. "Not interested in what?"
In you." I couldn't be more blunt.
Excuse me, miss, but I was going to ask if you would like to sign up for karaoke. — Karen E. Olson

Funny Miss You Quotes By Michele Jaffe

I didn't mean to interupt you if you were looking for your friends Miss
'
'Callihan,' but you can call my Jasmine. Or Jas.' Or Snookums. Honeybunch. Hotsie Totsie Cowgirl. My Little
'It's nice to meet you Jasmine, I'm Jack. — Michele Jaffe

Funny Miss You Quotes By Sara Sheridan

Can I fetch you something, madam? A cup of tea?'
In the old days she'd have been 'miss' and he'd have offered her a cocktail. — Sara Sheridan

Funny Miss You Quotes By Mitch Hedberg

Swiss cheese is the only cheese you can draw and people can identify. You can draw American cheese, but someone will think it's cheddar. It's the only cheese you can bite and miss. "Hey Mitch - does that sandwich have cheese on it?" "Every now and then!" — Mitch Hedberg

Funny Miss You Quotes By Harper Lee

We saw Uncle Jack every Christmas, and every Christmas he yelled across the street for Miss Maudie to come marry him. Miss Mauide would yell back, "Call a little louder, Jack Finch, and they'll hear you the post office, I haven't heard you yet!" Jem and I thought this a strange way to ask for a lady's hand in marriage, but then again Uncle Jack was rather strange. — Harper Lee

Funny Miss You Quotes By Lauren Barnholdt

Hello?" I say, sounding upbeat, and like I'm happy to be on the phone. I decide to pretend it's my imaginary girlfriend. Fuck pretending to be nice.
"Yo, " B. J. Says.
"What's going on, honey?" I say, trying to glance at Courtney out of the corner of my eye without her noticing that that's what I'm doing. She's going through her bag, probably looking for more makeup, so she can make herself look good for Lloyd.
"Honey?" B. J. Asks. "Jordy, I had no idea you felt that way about me. I have to warn you, though, I happen to be in a very committed relationship. "
"Yeah, I miss you, too. — Lauren Barnholdt

Funny Miss You Quotes By Jodi Picoult

Choices are funny things-ask a native tribe that's eaten grubs and roots forever if they're unhappy, and they'll shrug. But give them filet mignon and truffle sauce and then ask them to go back to living off the land, and they will always be thinking of that gourmet meal. If you don't know there's an alternative, you can't miss it. — Jodi Picoult

Funny Miss You Quotes By Jen Turano

Miss Sumner, may I inquire as to why you're lounging on the floor?" Mrs. Watson asked.
Miss Sumner uttered something which sounded very much like "it should be obvious" before she lifted her head. "You really must compliment your staff, Mrs. Watson. This floor is remarkably clean. — Jen Turano

Funny Miss You Quotes By Markus Zusak

I thought for a moment about the dog. Miffy. I guess no matter how much Rube and I complained about him, we knew we'd sort of miss him if something happened to him. It's funny how there are things in this world that do nothing but annoy you, but you know you'd miss them when they're gone. Miffy, the Pomeranian wonderdog, was one such thing. — Markus Zusak

Funny Miss You Quotes By Jenny Lyn

You don't like my restaurant, Miss Connor?"
"I couldn't say since the waiting list to get in is six months long."
One side of his mouth curved up. "This is true."
His finger lingered, and I tried to swallow the nervous lump in my throat. "I think you can call me by my first name now, seeing as how you're touching my boob. That puts us a little past formality, don't you think? — Jenny Lyn

Funny Miss You Quotes By Charlotte Stein

His head went back, on the stroke up, again. When he finally looked back at her hands still on him, and his cock all neatly wrapped, his words came out gravelly, and wondering.
"What a strange notion."
"You won't miss too much of the sensation. It's really not that bad."
His mouth quirked up at the corner.
"Why would I miss any sensation? The whole of our bodies are going to be touching. Are you going to encase the rest of me in a stocking?"
Laughter, again. It felt good, so good.
"I guess not - now get down here and fuck me. — Charlotte Stein

Funny Miss You Quotes By Paula Hawkins

I miss being a mistress. I enjoyed it. I loved it, in fact. I never felt guilty. I pretended I did. I had to, with my married girlfriends, the ones who live in terror of the pert au pair or the pretty, funny girl in the office who can talk about football and spends half her life in the gym. I had to tell them that of course I felt terrible about it, of course I felt bad for his wife, I never meant for any of this to happen, we fell in love, what could we do? The truth is, I never felt bad for Rachel.... She just wasn't real to me, and anyway, I was enjoying myself too much. Being the other woman is a huge turn-on, there's no point denying it: you're the one he can't help but betray his wife for, even though he loves her. That's just how irresistible you are. — Paula Hawkins

Funny Miss You Quotes By Libba Bray

It is funny how you do not miss affection until it is given, but once it is, it can never be enough; you would drown in it if possible. — Libba Bray

Funny Miss You Quotes By Kenneth Oppel

You two were in a cave together?' said Miss Simpkins in horror.
'Yes,' said Kate, 'and it was very, very dark. — Kenneth Oppel

Funny Miss You Quotes By Markus Zusak

It's funny how there are things in this world that do nothing but annoy you, but you know you'd miss them when they're gone. — Markus Zusak

Funny Miss You Quotes By Cathy Hopkins

No, Mo," Miss Watkins said, turning to Nesta who was crying with laughter. "Nesta Williams, seeing as you clearly find it so funny. What do you think the name of God might be?"
"Er, not sure," said Nesta, looking caught out. "What do you think?"
"I don't think," said Miss Watkins."I know."
"I don't think I know either," giggled Nesta. The whole class got detention, but it was worth it. I felt like i'd spent the whole morning laughing my head off
We never did get to know what God's name was. — Cathy Hopkins

Funny Miss You Quotes By Kiersten White

Marry me. Nay, marriage will cost us precious moments together. Let us make sweet, passionate love right here. Let me bear your children."
A primal growl signaled Miss Lynn getting over her shock at being thus addressed. She lunged forward; Jack deftly rolled off the bench, jumping up out of her reach.
"Goodness, I didn't expect you to be quite this enthusiastic about my advances. If I don't play hard to get, how will I ever know whether or not you respect me? — Kiersten White

Funny Miss You Quotes By Mary Jane Hathaway

Thank you. There were three of us kids, all right together. I'm the oldest, she was the knee-baby, and my brother Henry came last. Funny, I miss her all the time, but I miss her most when I'm reading Austen. We'd been fans since we were in the seventh and eighth grade, two Creole girls gigglin' about marriage proposals gone bad. Our daddy teased us about reading each other passages during a Fourth of July crawfish boil, so he named the biggest one Mr. Darcy and threw him in the pot." She looked up, a smile fighting the tears in her eyes. "We refused to eat him. — Mary Jane Hathaway

Funny Miss You Quotes By Jacqueline Woodson

I wouldn't mind the early autumn if you came home today I'd tell you how much I miss you and know I'd be okay. It's funny how we never know exactly how our life will go It's funny how a dream can fade with the break of day. Time can't erase the memory and time can't bring you home Last Summer was a part of me and now a part is gone. - Margaret — Jacqueline Woodson

Funny Miss You Quotes By Robert Lowell

Would you like me to write Mrs. Ames about inviting you to Yaddo? Get Miss Moore to write too. You can't invite yourself, though, of course, almost all the invitations are planned. It would be marvelous to have you there. I know the solitude that gets too much. It doesn't drug me, but I get fantastic and uncivilized.
At last my divorce [from Jean Stafford] is over. It's funny at my age to have one's life so much in and on one's hands. All the rawness of learning, what I used to think should be done with by twenty-five. Sometimes nothing is so solid to me as writing - I suppose that's what vocation means - at times a torment, a bad conscience, but all in all, purpose and direction, so I'm thankful, and call it good, as Eliot would say. — Robert Lowell

Funny Miss You Quotes By Javier Marias

And we offer each other words of consolation or distraction or encouragement when we see that one or the other of us is in need of such words. We also miss each other (vaguely) when we're not together, she's one of those people (in everyone's life there are four or five such people whose loss one truly feels) to whom you're used to telling everything that happens to you, that is, one of those people you think about when something happens to you, be it funny or dramatic, and for whom you store up events and anecdotes. You accept misfortunes gladly because you know you can tell those five people about them afterwards. — Javier Marias

Funny Miss You Quotes By Susan Elizabeth Phillips

I sure do miss that woman. Smart. Funny. Sweet. She never gave me a moment's trouble."
"Gosh, I'm sorry about that. I knew it was boring between you two, but not that bad. — Susan Elizabeth Phillips

Funny Miss You Quotes By Kathryn Stockett

Miss Celia stares down into the pot like she's looking for her future. "Are you happy, Minny?"
"Why you ask me funny questions like that?"
"But are you?"
"Course I's happy. You happy too. Big house, big yard, husband looking after you." I frown at Miss Celia and I make sure she can see it. Because ain't that white people for you, wondering if they are happy ENOUGH. — Kathryn Stockett

Funny Miss You Quotes By Shane Koyczan

What I said was
I'll miss you
what I meant to say was
I love you
what I wanted to say was
that I meant what I said
and it's funny
how all those things I
could have said
flooded my head after we said goodbye
and I should have told you
I'd be willing to hold you
until my flesh crumbles into bone
because I'm willing to die alone
but god knows I don't want to live that way. — Shane Koyczan

Funny Miss You Quotes By David Levithan

In the time it takes for all of this to happen, Tariq takes a shower. In the time it takes for all of this to happen, Craig (admittedly a slow eater) eats a piece of French toast. In the time it takes for all of this to happen, Peter loads up a video game and starts to play. In the time it takes for all of this to happen, Avery wakes to find a phone number still written on his hand, and wonders what to do next. He doesn't have to worry, though. Ryan is already on it. He has Avery's number in his phone, and as soon as the clock hits ten, he's going to call. He feels it's rude to call anyone before ten. So he waits. Impatiently, he waits. It's funny the things you miss. Like phone cords. Reading — David Levithan

Funny Miss You Quotes By Becca Fitzpatrick

One last thing," he said. "Stop looking for me."
"I'm not looking for you." I scoffed.
He touched his index finger to my forehead, my skin absurdly warming under his touch. It didn't escape me that he couldn't seem to stop finding reasons to touch me. Nor did I miss that I didn't want him to stop. "Under all the layers, a part of you remembers. It's the part that came looking for me tonight. It's that part that's going to get you killed, if you're not careful."
We stood face-to-face, both of us breathing hard. The sirens were so close now.
"What am I supposed to tell the police?" I said.
"You're not going to talk to the police."
"Oh, really? Funny, because I plan on telling them exactly how you rammed that tire iron into Gabe's back. Unless you answer my questions."
He gave an ironic snort. "Blackmail? You've changed, Angel. — Becca Fitzpatrick

Funny Miss You Quotes By Hillary Homzie

Dad shakes his head. "Nope. His name start with an F." He snaps his fingers. "Floyd. That's it. When I picked you up from school, I overheard you say how much you like him, and miss him, and . . ." Then my brother and I start laughing so hard we practically hyperventilate. Dad shrugs. "What? I know I'm clueless, but you've got to tell me what's so funny." "Floyd is Karma's phone," says Toby, who's clutching his stomach because he's laughing so hard. My — Hillary Homzie

Funny Miss You Quotes By Heather Lyons

It's funny how you can miss someone desperately when they're standing right in front of you. — Heather Lyons

Funny Miss You Quotes By Johnny Depp

It's such a funny thing when you see your daughter transitioning from your baby, your little girl, to suddenly being a young woman. If you're not really looking for it, you can miss it, and Lily-Rose is on that road already, and there's nothing I can do to stop it. — Johnny Depp

Funny Miss You Quotes By Laurell K. Hamilton

I sat on the bed. Neither of us said anything. I wasn't slick and sophisticated enough for this. What do you say to boyfriend A when he finds you naked in the bed of boyfriend B? Especially if boyfriend A turned into a monster the night before and ate someone. I bet Miss Manners didn't cover this at all. — Laurell K. Hamilton

Funny Miss You Quotes By Lauren Willig

Turning to Turnip, Miss Dempsey said, 'Do you think?'. 'As little as I can,' Turnip replied honestly. — Lauren Willig

Funny Miss You Quotes By Miss Merikan

I like cats. They don't care if you love Jesus. — Miss Merikan

Funny Miss You Quotes By Harper Lee

Whoa, son," said Atticus. "Nobody's about to make you go anywhere but to bed pretty soon. I'm just going over to tell Miss Rachel you're here and ask her if you could spend the night with us - you'd like that, wouldn't you? And for goodness' sake put some of the county back where it belongs, the soil erosion's bad enough as it is." Dill stared at my father's retreating figure. "He's tryin' to be funny," I said. "He means take a bath. See there, I told you he wouldn't bother you. — Harper Lee

Funny Miss You Quotes By Winston Churchill

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. — Winston Churchill

Funny Miss You Quotes By Jean Webster

He and I always think the same things are funny, and that is such a lot; it's dreadful when two people's senses of humour are antagonistic. I don't
believe there's any bridging that gulf!
And he is
Oh, well! He is just himself, and I miss him, and miss him, and miss him. The whole world seems empty and aching. I hate the moonlight because it's beautiful and he isn't here to see
it with me. But maybe you've loved somebody, too, and you know? If you have, I don't need to explain; if you haven't, I can't explain. — Jean Webster

Funny Miss You Quotes By Fannie Flagg

You know, it's funny what you'll miss when you're away from home. Now me, I miss the smell of coffee ... and bacon frying in the morning. — Fannie Flagg

Funny Miss You Quotes By Amy Tan

The next world is 'segregated'? You can go to the World of Yin only if you're Chinese?"
"No-no! Miss Banner, she not Chinese, she go to Yin World. All depend what you love, what you believe. You love Jesus, go Jesus House. You love Allah, go Allah Land. You love sleep, go sleep."
"What if you don't believe in anything for sure before you die?"
"Then you go big place, like Disneyland, many places can go try
you like, you decide. No charge, of course. — Amy Tan

Funny Miss You Quotes By Georgia Cates

Nookie." I giggle because the word itself is funny but hearing her say it makes it even more so. "I'm going to give you some advice because you're still a new wife - and because my son can be a little shit at times. I know; I'm his mum." She looks around as though she's about to reveal top-secret information. "Nookie equals power and there's a reason he wants it from you all the time. It levels the playing field. Don't like something he's doing? Take the nookie away. Get the results you want. Need him to see things your way but he refuses? Withhold the nookie and he'll make the fastest attitude adjustment you've ever seen. Want your husband to retire because he's going to work himself into an early grave and miss his grandchildren growing up the way he missed his kids? Close the gates of nookie and get your husband home with you instead of burying him. That's how you work it, darling. You use the power of the nookie to get the results you want. — Georgia Cates

Funny Miss You Quotes By Agatha Christie

It's rather like Happy Families, isn't it?Mrs Legal, the lawyer's wife, Miss Dose, the doctor's daughter, etc. ... So sweet and funny and old-world. You just can't think of anything nasty happening here, can you? — Agatha Christie

Funny Miss You Quotes By Charles Dickens

"Peggotty!" repeated Miss Betsey, with some indignation. "Do you mean to say, child, that any human being has gone into a Christian church, and got herself named Peggotty?" — Charles Dickens

Funny Miss You Quotes By David Levithan

It looks like Animal and Miss piggy had sex," I said. "And this was the spawn."
"My eyes!" Boomer cried. "My eyes! I can't stop seeing it now that you've said it! — David Levithan

Funny Miss You Quotes By Hal Roach

The likelihood of getting lost is directly proportional to the number of times the direction-giver says, 'You can't miss it'. — Hal Roach

Funny Miss You Quotes By Kathyrn Stockett

Miss Taylor says kids that are colored can't go to my school cause they're not smart enough." I come round the counter then. Lift her chin up and smooth back her funny-looking hair. "You think I'm dumb?" "No," she whispers hard, like she means it so much. She look sorry she said it. "What that tell you about Miss Taylor, then?" She blink, like she listening good. "Means Miss Taylor ain't right all the time," I say. She hug me around my neck, say, "You're righter than Miss Taylor." I tear up then. My cup is spilling over. Those is new words to me. — Kathyrn Stockett

Funny Miss You Quotes By Kady Cross

You have a point," he conceded. "Shall I put my foot down? How about I issue an ultimatum? Its Dandy or me. What would you say to that, Miss Jayne?"
Her honey-brown eyebrows lifted, "I would probably choose Dandy just to spite you. — Kady Cross