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Quotes & Sayings About Family Funny

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Top Family Funny Quotes

Family Funny Quotes By Karl Pilkington

It's just hassle of having friends and family an' that. — Karl Pilkington

Family Funny Quotes By Andrea Fay Friedman

I thought the line 'I am the daughter of the former governor of Alaska' was very funny. I think the word is 'sarcasm.' In my family we think laughing is good. My parents raised me to have a sense of humor and to live a normal life. — Andrea Fay Friedman

Family Funny Quotes By Bob Newhart

I really don't know what makes a comedian. I think it's a family background and environment. Yet if you put the same ingredients in another person, he may never utter a funny line. — Bob Newhart

Family Funny Quotes By G.L. Tomas

Sai-Liber is my family name.Much like Wayfairer.You may call me Tetraphrimaportacheeq.It is much simpler."
To who? I'd barely got it out the first time. — G.L. Tomas

Family Funny Quotes By Jerry Seinfeld

Nothing in life is fun for the whole family. There are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry. — Jerry Seinfeld

Family Funny Quotes By Meg Cabot

We were a very funny family. Humour was the tool with which my brother and I tried to get attention. We were always trying to be the funniest. — Meg Cabot

Family Funny Quotes By Gordon Korman

He watched in awe as she stacked up an enormous armload of music. "There," she finished, slapping Frank Zappa's Greatest Hits on top of the pile. "That should do for a start."
"You are a music lover," said the wide-eyed cashier.
"No, I'm a kleptomaniac." And she dashed out the door.
He was so utterly shocked that it took him a moment to run after her.
With a meaningful nod in the direction of the astounded Cahills, she barreled down the cobblestone street with her load.
"Fermati!" shouted the cashier, scrambling in breathless pursuit.
Nellie let a few CDs drop and watched with satisfaction over her shoulder as the clerk stopped to pick them up. The trick would be to keep the chase going just long enough for Amy and Dan to search Disco Volante.
Yikes, she reflected suddenly, I'm starting to think like a Cahill ...
And if she was nuts enough to hang around this family, it was only going to get worse. — Gordon Korman

Family Funny Quotes By Kristen Schaal

I wanted to make sure that my act was family friendly for tonight, but I don't have babies. So I thought that maybe I could pretend that I had babies and that way I could appeal to the people in the audience who have babies and to the people who like to pretend that they have babies. — Kristen Schaal

Family Funny Quotes By Miss Read

Marrows - alas! - are arriving in a steady stream at the back door ... Oddly enough, the majority of people who grow them in Fairacre say, as they hand them over: 'Funny thing! I don't care for them myself. In fact, none of the family likes them!' But still they plant them. It must be the fascination of seeing such a wonderful return for one small seed, that keeps marrow-growers at their dubious task. — Miss Read

Family Funny Quotes By Flynn Meaney

Our neighbors were so excited when a black family moved in that they got them a welcome basket with the first three seasons of The Cosby Show on DVD. — Flynn Meaney

Family Funny Quotes By Kristen Schaal

He resisted for a while and there were some legal boundaries, you know, keeping me from being near him or his family, but in the end, love overcame. And I got what I wanted. I always get what I want ... — Kristen Schaal

Family Funny Quotes By William Goldman

Funny thing- Morgenstern's folk's were named Max and Valerie and his father was a doctor. — William Goldman

Family Funny Quotes By Julian Mitchell

Freud is all nonsense; the secret of neurosis is to be found in the family battle of wills to see who can refuse the longest to help with the dishes. — Julian Mitchell

Family Funny Quotes By Louie Anderson

You have to be funny about it and honest about it. You can't leave yourself out of that mix. You have to be honest enough to say, I'm that messed-up one in the family. — Louie Anderson

Family Funny Quotes By David Levithan

In my mind, she was Lebkuchen Spice - ironic, Germanic, sexy, and off beat. And, mein Gott, the girl could bake a damn fine cookie ... to the point that I wanted to answer her What do you want for Christmas? with a simple More cookies, please!
But no. She warned me not to be a smart-ass, and while that answer was totally sincere, I was afraid she would think I was joking or,
worse, kissing up.
It was a hard question, especially if I had to batten down the sarcasm. I mean, there was the beauty pageant answer of world peace, although I'd probably have to render it in the beauty pageant spelling of world peas. I could play the boo-hoo orphan card and wish for my whole family to be together, but that was the last thing I wanted, especially at this late date. — David Levithan

Family Funny Quotes By Sebastian Barry

It is funny, but it strikes me that a person without anecdotes that they nurse while they live, and that survive them, are more likely to be utterly lost not only to history but the family following them. Of course this is the fate of most souls, reducing entire lives, no matter how vivid and wonderful, to those sad black names on withering family trees, with half a date dangling after and a question mark. — Sebastian Barry

Family Funny Quotes By Kristin Hannah

That's the funny thing about writing your life story. You start out trying to remember dates and times and names. You think it's about facts, your life; that what you'll look back on and remember are the successes and failures, the time line of your youth and middle age, but that isn't it at all. Love. Family. Laughter. That's what I remember when it's all said and done. — Kristin Hannah

Family Funny Quotes By Robert Galbraith

It had been, in Robin's view, the most perfect proposal, ever, in the history of matrimony. He had even had a ring in his pocket, which she was now wearing; a sapphire with two diamonds, it fitted perfectly, and all the way into town she kept staring at it on her hand as it rested on her lap. She and Matthew had a story to tell now, a funny family story, the kind you told your children, in which his planning (she loved that he had planned it) went awry, and turned into something spontaneous. She loved the tramps, and the moon, and Matthew, panicky and flustered, on one knee; she loved Eros, and dirty old Piccadilly, and the black cab they had taken home to Clapham. She — Robert Galbraith

Family Funny Quotes By Sarah Jones

My grandmothers are Irish-American and German-American; my grandfather is from the Caribbean. My father is African-American. My family looked funny. I just started naturally imitating whoever I was talking to. I didn't want to be a phony, but I felt very authentic in the moment. — Sarah Jones

Family Funny Quotes By Erik Scott De Bie

Interesting how fashion is cyclical," Jaccob said when she came out of the store with two black plastic bags. "Goth was the look when I was young, too."
"It's not a look," Chuck said. "I'm just wearing my feelings on the outside."
"Uh huh." His phone buzzed. "Hang on a second."
He rolled up his sleeve to check his HUD, but the call hadn't come through there.
Huh. He had to pick up his phone and check the read-out, which listed a phone number: an old school page. "That's funny ... "
"Dad, you're doing that thing again," Chuck said.
"What thing?" Jaccob asked.
"That thing where you have to check every single doohickey you carry around."
"I am not." Jaccob took his hand out of his coat pocket, where he'd been reaching to check his police scanner or music player (he hadn't decided which to use first). — Erik Scott De Bie

Family Funny Quotes By Robert Brault

A family is a group of people who keep confusing you with someone you were as a kid. — Robert Brault

Family Funny Quotes By Seth MacFarlane

We never really tried to shock for shock's sake on 'Family Guy'. If something was horribly offensive and shocking, we would put it in if it was also hysterically funny. — Seth MacFarlane

Family Funny Quotes By Gary Gulman

I always wanted to make strangers and friends and family laugh. I was over ten years younger than my brothers. It was hard to get attention without some kind of gimmick, like athletic stardom or being funny. — Gary Gulman

Family Funny Quotes By Nova Ren Suma

They decide as soon as they meet you. Ten seconds in. If you're poor. If you're brown. If you're black. If you've got an accent. If your skirt's too short. If your nose is ugly - sorry, Cherie. If you're chewing gum. If you're breathing funny. If nobody from your family is there. If you're any of that? Or all of that? Have a nice life, because you're out of there. — Nova Ren Suma

Family Funny Quotes By Jennifer L. Armentrout

We can't lose you," she said after a few moments of awkward as hell silence. "You have to understand that we aren't doing this because we don't care about Kat. We're doing this because we love you."
"But I love her," I said without hesitation.
Dee's eyes widened, probably since it was the first time she'd herd me say it out loud, well, about anyone other than my family. I wished I had said it more often, especially to Kat. Funny how that kind of shit always turns out in the end. While you're deep in something, you never say or do what you need to. It's always after the fact, when it's too late that you realize what you've should've said or done/
It couldn't be too late. I knew that. The fact that I was still alive was testament to that. Like Dee said, though, there were worse things than death. — Jennifer L. Armentrout

Family Funny Quotes By Eddie Huang

Figure it out!" We always had to figure it out, so you can, too! We didn't have the luxury of people explaining why I couldn't use my left hand or why his family had no money. We just figured it out. But love is a funny thing. — Eddie Huang

Family Funny Quotes By Han Nolan

And she didn't once say anything about this being a sin. It used to be I got the word sin slapped in my face every time I did something wrong, but come on, when you live in a sin-free family with sin-free parents and a sin-free sister, well, you can't help but sin a little extra on their behalf. — Han Nolan

Family Funny Quotes By April Mae Monterrosa

Funny how things work themselves out. Things happen that split up family and friends, then things happen that bring them back together. Everyone is in your life for a reason. My hope is for all the reasons to be good. Those who love you never lose touch, are always consistent, and unquestionable. — April Mae Monterrosa

Family Funny Quotes By Jeff Foxworthy

By the time we get to church, I need church cuz I've been yelled at by everyone in the family. — Jeff Foxworthy

Family Funny Quotes By Leslie Nielsen

I've always been part of comedy. One of the things about our family was that if we were reasonably funny with each other, particularly my two brothers and myself, when my father was upset with something you'd want to make sure in some way you made him laugh. Because when he didn't laugh, you were in trouble! — Leslie Nielsen

Family Funny Quotes By Salman Rushdie

Stories in families are colossally important. Every family has stories: some funny, some proud, some embarrassing, some shameful. Knowing them is proof of belonging to the family. — Salman Rushdie

Family Funny Quotes By Milton Jones

Most of my relatives are police marksmen, apart from my grandad who was a bank robber. He died recently, surrounded by his family. — Milton Jones

Family Funny Quotes By Lewis Grizzard

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. — Lewis Grizzard

Family Funny Quotes By Louis C.K.

Fuck it ... That's really the attitude that keeps a family together, it's not "we love each other", it's just "fuck it, man. — Louis C.K.

Family Funny Quotes By Rin Chupeco

There are so many other fun ways to dishonor the family name that buying girls' underwear shouldn't be one of them. — Rin Chupeco

Family Funny Quotes By Phillip Noyce

People just don't laugh when their family is violated, and you don't shrug it off. You band together and you defend together. It's a funny, primitive instinct. — Phillip Noyce

Family Funny Quotes By Carrot Top

I was the class clown at school, but at home, my family wasn't very funny. — Carrot Top

Family Funny Quotes By Susan Mallery

Funny how worried you are that Dani's not a Buchanan when you're not one yourself. If I remember my history correctly, you married into this family. You were a poor nobody. What? A hotel chambermaid?" Gloria stiffened. Penny allowed herself a slight smile. "Oh, yeah. I did my research on you years ago. I know all about your affair with Ian Buchanan and how when that ended, you married his son. Tell me, Gloria. Were you still banging Daddy when you walked down the aisle with the son?" "You slut," Gloria hissed. "You should know." "I'll destroy you." "You can try. I'm up to the fight. But before you waste your effort on that, let me share one thing with you. — Susan Mallery

Family Funny Quotes By Rachel DeWoskin

Whenever anyone finds out there are seven kids in my family, the imagine my mom and dad having sex. — Rachel DeWoskin

Family Funny Quotes By Woody Allen

I am an only child. I have one sister. — Woody Allen

Family Funny Quotes By Busy Philipps

I've always liked being funny and making people laugh. I was a cut-up when I was a kid, and was always doing bits for my friends and family. — Busy Philipps

Family Funny Quotes By Joey Badass

Luckily for me, I became a rap star so I'm making enough money to support my family. It's funny because that may seem like the only way that I can do such a task. — Joey Badass

Family Funny Quotes By Ann Romney

That's why I like to get out there, and get people to see the other side of Mitt, and know us in a different reflection when you see the family and how funny he is with the boys and with the grandkids. And you know, just what a super guy he is. That's part of what I am doing, is letting people see the other side of Mitt. — Ann Romney

Family Funny Quotes By Erica Ash

To be honest with you, the dramatic side is more fun to play because I don't get to do it as often as I get to do the comedy stuff. Most of my work in this business has been comedy, and that's sort of the way the cookie crumbles. I had not sought out to just be a comedic actor, but I think that's my default because I come from a funny family. — Erica Ash

Family Funny Quotes By Haruki Murakami

(When asked "Was the model for Midori (a character in Norwegian Wood) modeled after your wife?")
I showed your message to my wife. She got mad and yelled: "What would make them think I was the model for Midori?!" She told me to fix the misunderstanding immediately, so that's why I'm writing this reply now. Please stop causing problems in my household. Thank you. — Haruki Murakami

Family Funny Quotes By Moby

Better a loving single-parent family than a 'conventional' family where the parents hate each other and the father is a demagogue. — Moby

Family Funny Quotes By Bryan Fuller

Looking back, it's funny how the lighter family-friendly version of these classic Universal movie monsters that were satirized in The Munsters seduced me like a gateway drug into the genre. — Bryan Fuller

Family Funny Quotes By Charles Dickens

" ... It is not my desire to wound the feelings of any person with whom I am connected in family bonds. I may be a hypocrite," said Mr. Pecksniff, cuttingly, "but I am not a brute." — Charles Dickens

Family Funny Quotes By Conan O'Brien

The Romneys have a horse competing in the Olympics. Ann Romney's horse failed to win a medal in the dressage event today, which is a shame because if there's one thing that family needs, it's more gold. — Conan O'Brien

Family Funny Quotes By Mark Pendergrast

Coca-Cola remains emblematic of the best and worst of America and Western civilization. The history of Coca-Cola is the often funny story of a group of men obsessed with putting a trivial soft drink "within an arm's reach of desire." But at the same time, it is a microcosm of American history. Coca-Cola grew up with the country, shaping and shaped by the times. The drink not only helped to alter consumption patterns, but attitudes toward leisure, work, advertising, sex, family life, and patriotism. — Mark Pendergrast

Family Funny Quotes By Siri Hustvedt

We drank coffee. We talked. She loved Charles Dickens, whom she read in Norwegian. Years after she was dead, I wrote a dissertation on Dickens, and though my study of the great man would no doubt have alarmed her, I had a funny feeling that by taking on the English novelist I was returning to my Norwegian roots. — Siri Hustvedt

Family Funny Quotes By Caroline Sunshine

Our family's special holiday tradition is going over to my grandparent's house on Christmas morning. My grandma cooks a big breakfast, and I love hearing her tell old funny stories. — Caroline Sunshine

Family Funny Quotes By Rick Riordan

What's the best part of being in Hermes cabin?
Connor: You are never lonely. I mean seriously, new kids are always coming in. So you always have someone to talk to.
Travis: Or prank.
Connor: Or pickpocket. One big happy family. — Rick Riordan

Family Funny Quotes By Heather Brewer

The lapels of Sprat's many-buckled jacket were covered with buttons. Most of them belonged to bands, but a few were pretty funny. Like the one that read 'MY FAMILY'S A FREAKSHOW WITHOUT A TENT' and the one that boldly proclaimed 'I (HEART) BEING AWESOME'. Vlad pointed to the one that read 'I'M SO GOTH PEOPLE ASK ME TO AUTOGRAPH BOXES OF COUNT CHOCULA' and smirked. — Heather Brewer

Family Funny Quotes By Kim Fields

It's funny how God will just keep using you, and our motto around our family forever has been, 'Just let Him use you.' — Kim Fields

Family Funny Quotes By Jenny McCarthy

I guess now that I think back, I used to play priest and be a funny priest. I don't know, I grew up in such a Catholic family that I kind of liked to test the boundaries a little bit and I think I had fun watching my mom laugh. — Jenny McCarthy

Family Funny Quotes By Romola Garai

When I was a child, I always wanted to be funny and to please people in my family. As you grow up that instinct becomes more refined, but it's still there. — Romola Garai

Family Funny Quotes By Roger Caras

I always thought that my canine family tended to view me as the funny-looking two-legged dog who runs the can opener. — Roger Caras

Family Funny Quotes By Rachel Caine

Well, friend, I don't know about your tastes, but I tend to like it very bloody," Myrnin said. He shifted position, dragging Claire along like a rag doll without any effort at all. "Have we been introduced?"
"Probably not. Why, are you asking me out, sweetheart?"
"You're not my type, darling. Is this one yours?"
"No," Frank said, and looked at Shane, just in a quick flicker. "Let's say she's a friend of the family. — Rachel Caine

Family Funny Quotes By Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

The world is full of unrequited love,' I said finally.
'You and Patrick having problems?' Dad said, reaching around to get the butter out of the fridge.
'No, I was just wondering what you would say if I was a lesbian.'
'Come again?' said Lester. 'I'm having a hard time following this conversation. — Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

Family Funny Quotes By P. J. O'Rourke

My whole family can talk. They are all car salesmen. They are all funny. — P. J. O'Rourke

Family Funny Quotes By Pepper Winters

Funny how I'd run from it all my life and it was so easy to give in to it now. I loved this woman to the galaxy and back. I always would. She was my wife. My esclave. And soon, we would have a family. — Pepper Winters

Family Funny Quotes By Mike Birbiglia

I don't drink a lot. My family calls me an old soul. And my friends call me a pussy. — Mike Birbiglia

Family Funny Quotes By Sherrilyn Kenyon

What's the deal with this Malachai?" Xevikan
"I don't know. I just joined him myself. But he seems level. Decent even." Zavid
"He's with a half-daeve turncoat, a Charonte, and an Aamon, and you don't find that off?" Xevikan
"Wait until you meet his Arel girlfriend, lunatic mother, and the two human homicidal maniac he calls family. Buddy, everything about the Malachai ain't right." Zavid — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Family Funny Quotes By Missi Pyle

I grew up in Middle America and I don't think my family was very funny, but I watched 'The Princess Bride.' I always wanted to be an actor. I didn't know anything about it. I'd never seen any plays or anything and I watched that movie over and over and over again. — Missi Pyle

Family Funny Quotes By Herbie Hancock

My father was really good with math. It's a funny thing, I don't remember my father or my mother being so mechanical-minded. My father always wanted to be a doctor, but he came from a really poor family in Georgia, and there was no way he was going to be a doctor. — Herbie Hancock

Family Funny Quotes By Ben Fountain

We were at the White House a couple of weeks ago," the man says, "they had a state dinner for Prince Charles and Camilla. Listen, those royals are just the finest people, no pretensions to them whatsoever. You can talk to Prince Charles about anything."
Billy nods. There's a silence. Just in time he asks, "What did you talk about?"
"Hunting," the man answers. — Ben Fountain

Family Funny Quotes By Lindsay Chamberlin

It only took Alexis a day to read a five-hundred page book. Fiction stories took her to another world where she could lose herself for a while in someone else's life.
Its funny how things like loans to pay back, a broken home and family, and a future to worry about meant nothing to characters who only had to worry about things like boys, beaches and fun. — Lindsay Chamberlin

Family Funny Quotes By Andrea Speed

Cockblocked by the phone. Wanna bet it's Focus On The Family or some Satanic organization like? — Andrea Speed

Family Funny Quotes By Andy Samberg

My mom let me kind of run free and be rowdy. She encouraged it. I'm a youngest child. So I was spazzy and trying to be funny to my older sisters. It's kind of my role in the family - tension reliever. I was funny or annoying, depending on your perspective. — Andy Samberg

Family Funny Quotes By Henny Youngman

I wish my brother would learn a trade, so I would know what kind of work he's out of. — Henny Youngman

Family Funny Quotes By Shari Sebbens

I definitely take after my dad, looks-wise. But my mum is my greatest inspiration. All the women in my family are amazing. They're hilarious. I love funny people. — Shari Sebbens

Family Funny Quotes By Katherine Applegate

My family tree spreads wide as well. I am a great ape, and you are a great ape, and so are chimpanzees and orangutans and bonobos, all of us distant and distrustful cousins.
I know this is troubling.
I too find it hard to believe there is a connection across time and space, linking me to a race of ill-mannered clowns.
Chimps. There's no excuse for them. — Katherine Applegate

Family Funny Quotes By John Bradshaw

THE MYTH OF THE GOOD OL BOY AND THE NICE GAL
The good of boy myth and the nice gal are a kind of social conformity myth. They create a real paradox when put together with the "rugged individual" part of the Success Myth. How can I be a rugged individual, be my own man and conform at the same time? Conforming means "Don't make a wave", "Don't rock the boat". Be a nice gal or a good ol' boy. This means that we have to pretend a lot.
"We are taught to be nice and polite. We are taught that these behaviors (most often lies) are better than telling the truth. Our churches, schools, and politics are rampant with teaching dishonesty (saying things we don't mean and pretending to feel ways we don't feel). We smile when we feel sad; laugh nervously when dealing with grief; laugh at jokes we don't think are funny; tell people things to be polite that we surely don't mean."
- Bradshaw On: The Family — John Bradshaw

Family Funny Quotes By Paul Bettany

I still read the British papers, but I've never been a Royalist, ever. It's funny, there always seems to be much more of a fascination with the Royal Family over here then there does in England. — Paul Bettany

Family Funny Quotes By Gunther Bloch

Where are the ethical concerns, that so many people called animal lovers invoke, when you steal the children of wild dog mothers and other family members from right before their eyes? Do ethics always refer only to what people think appropriate for purely subjective reasons?
Ultimately, our long-term research resulted in a very sad picture: With the exception of the random puppy, who today as an adult actually is interested in people, neither male Maccia nor the most of the other "rescued" dogs are socially and environmentally secure, but had remained shy and partly vegetate in kennels with empty eyes. Such dogs are neither fish nor fowl, although taken from the wild population in the early age of about eight to twelve weeks (except Maccia, whom Funny "rescued" at the age of four months, which is even more irresponsible). — Gunther Bloch

Family Funny Quotes By Jay Leno

Comedy is the only profession where love from a stranger is better than love from a family member. You need to perform for strangers to see if you're really funny. If they laugh and cheer, it's the greatest thing in the world. — Jay Leno

Family Funny Quotes By Gabrielle Zevin

It was funny how dad was more honest in a book that anyone in the world could pick up and read than he could be talking to me. Or maybe it was sad. One or the other. Sometimes it's hard to tell. — Gabrielle Zevin

Family Funny Quotes By Henny Youngman

My brother then opened a tall man's shop in Tokyo. — Henny Youngman

Family Funny Quotes By Shannon Hale

"Repeat that?"
"It's National Talk Like a Pirate Day. Didn't you know?"
"Somehow I missed the memo."
"You mean, 'Somehow I missed the memo, arrr!'"
"Precisely. Arr. So, Mrs. Jack ... Er, is that still your name? Or, I tremble to ask, have you adopted a pirate identity?"
"Arr, matey, of course I have! It's ... " She pulled an eggplant from the grocery bag. "Captain Eggplantier." She needed to stop speaking the first words that popped into her mind.
"Captain Eggplanteir." He sounded very doubtful.
"That's right. A family name. It's Belgian. — Shannon Hale

Family Funny Quotes By Liane Moriarty

Over the years, 'organized' seemed to have become her most defining characteristic. It was like she was a minor celebrity with this one claim to fame. It was funny how once it became a thing that her family and friends commented on and teased her about, it seemed to perpetuate itself, so that her life was now extraordinarily well organized ... — Liane Moriarty

Family Funny Quotes By Tom Hiddleston

At Christmas, individuals are apportioned their roles in the family script - you're either the funny one or the sensitive one; or you either do the cooking or the washing up. And those roles aren't easy to change. — Tom Hiddleston

Family Funny Quotes By Jim Benton

I had the great idea of using markers to gently color the ants so I could tell them apart, but I learned that this is exactly like somebody trying to gently color on you with a thirty-story building.
Without dwelling on the tragedy, I'd just like to say that I'm deeply sorry to Mr. Purple and the surviving Purple family. — Jim Benton

Family Funny Quotes By Nate Corddry

There are a lot of funny people in my family. Absolutely. There were a lot of jokes growing up around the dinner table, for sure. We didn't grow up in a creative family. — Nate Corddry

Family Funny Quotes By Anne Lamott

I took notes on the people around me, in my town, in my family, in my memory. I took notes on my own state of mind, my grandiosity, the low self-esteem. I wrote down the funny stuff I overheard. I learned to be like a ship's rat, veined ears trembling, and I learned to scribble it all down. — Anne Lamott

Family Funny Quotes By Martha Plimpton

It's not common for a woman on television, especially if she's the mom of the family, to be funny. She's usually a straight man or foil. — Martha Plimpton

Family Funny Quotes By Patrick Ness

Funny how you can forget that every family isn't like yours. — Patrick Ness

Family Funny Quotes By Rhys Darby

I have a 10 year old boy and a 6 year old boy and the stuff that they watch, it's always ... I mean, it could be because we're a funny family, but they love the humor and combining humor with space action, I mean, you know, there's a winner right there. — Rhys Darby

Family Funny Quotes By Prince Andrew

Her friends say she is very funny. At a family dinner, she stood to go, and the footman very properly pulled her chair away. At that moment I asked her a question and she sat down again, except there was no chair. Everyone, including the Queen, laughed and laughed. — Prince Andrew

Family Funny Quotes By Gina Damico

Well, remember, active Grims can't have children. Fertility is adversley affected by the proximity to the ether, to Elixir, and all sorts of other components
plus, the Grimsphere is no place to raise a family, even if woman conceive here."
Lex snuck a glance at Driggs, but Uncle Mort caught her.
"That doesn't mean you get a free pass to ride the baloney pony when ever you want to. Got it? — Gina Damico

Family Funny Quotes By Michael Keaton

In high school, I was too shy to perform. It's one thing to get laughs from your family, to be funny at parties and in class. It's another thing to get up on the stage. — Michael Keaton

Family Funny Quotes By Libba Bray

You set fire to my house, killed my family, and ate my dog. But steal my boyfriend? That's a step too far. — Libba Bray

Family Funny Quotes By Paul Lynde

I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church. — Paul Lynde

Family Funny Quotes By Dave Eggers

Toph, I want to tell you something. I want to tell you about my nipples. I want to tell you about my nipples, and generally about the nipples of the men in our family. Because someday, son [I do this thing, and he does this thing, where I call him son and he calls me dad, when we are having funny father-son-type chats, mocking them in a way while also being secretly, deeply queasy about using these terms], someday my nipples will be your nipples. Someday you too will have nipples that protrude unnaturally far from your chest, and which will harden at the slightest provocation, preventing you from wearing anything but the heaviest cotton T-shirts. — Dave Eggers

Family Funny Quotes By Anthony Anderson

I realized my family was funny, because nobody ever wanted to leave our house. — Anthony Anderson

Family Funny Quotes By S.A. Huchton

She never wanted an extravagant life-- only one filled with simple joys like children, family, friendship, good books, funny jokes, and a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream. — S.A. Huchton

Family Funny Quotes By Sheryl Sandberg

It may not be as dramatic or funny to make a movie about a woman who loves both her job and her family, but that would be a better reflection of reality. We need more portrayals of women as competent professionals and happy mothers - — Sheryl Sandberg

Family Funny Quotes By Sherrilyn Kenyon

What's the one thing you want more than any other, prince?""My wife."Dionysus rolled his eyes. "Okay, what's the second thing you want?""My son."This time the god expelled a long exasperated breath. "Third? And if you name another family member, I will leave you here with Apollo, so help me, Zeus."Sadly, Styxx had no other family to name and only one other thing he craved. "To die.""Ah, you can be taught. Yah! And yeah, death. You kill Acheron and you die. I get to rule the world of man and everyone's happy." Hands on hips, Dionysus arched a brow. "So what do you say?""I say get me the fuck out of here. — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Family Funny Quotes By Sara Gran

Just when you thought the mafia novel was dead, Tod Goldberg breathes new life into it. Gangsterland, the best mafia novel in years, is a dark, funny, and smart page-turning crime story. It's also a moving, thoughtful meditation on ethics, religion, family, and a culture that eats itself. I loved this book. — Sara Gran

Family Funny Quotes By Pippa Middleton

It sounds funny to say, but we saw [Kate's wedding to Prince William] as just a family wedding. And actually, I didn't realize - perhaps - the scale of it until afterwards. We all took on the roles as any family would. — Pippa Middleton