Cupcake Quotes & Sayings

You're funny.' Phoebe passed me the last chocolate cupcake. 'And I always thought your friends were laughing over their own farts.'
'Ninety percent of Eastwood's male population laughs over their own farts. Present company excluded, naturally. — Robyn Schneider

He shifts awkwardly, and I realize a few things:
First, I'm still clinging to a stranger I fell into like an idiot.
Second, before he moved, I think I felt something hard. Down there. Maybe.
Third, I have cupcake all over my face. — Helena Rac

Oprah got her money," she snapped. "You trying to get YOURS! No, turn off that fuckin' TV and get to studying! — Cupcake Brown

On my honor, I ain't ever tasting another woman's sexual
favors. Even if the bakery offers 'em up in a cupcake wrapper and
calls 'em whipped dreams. — Jamie Farrell

I'm really boring. I get up early. I go to bed early. I don't smoke or drink. I mean, I'll eat a cupcake. I'm just not a crazy, stay-out-all-night sort of person. I love writing. — Karin Slaughter

taste it! it's to die for! — Vee Jocson

Im wearing an outfit that looks just like a cupcake ... a pink frothy blouse, low cut ... everything a little inappropriately girlie ... Pink, pink, lot of pink, ... Out of Practice. — Jennifer Tilly

Sometimes I see really skinny girls. They may look great, but ... they're not happy. Have a cupcake. — Kathy Wakile

She was not good on the phone. She needed the face, the pattern of eyes, nose, trembling mouth ... People talking were meant to look at a face, the disastrous cupcake of it, the hide-and-seek of the heart dashing across. With a phone, you said words, but you never watched them go in. You saw them off at the airport but never knew whether there was anyone there to greet them when they got off the plane. — Lorrie Moore

Have we become a cupcake league? We already have better helmets and gear. Wonder how the old school players feel about this. Not in the back of minds when talking about 18 game season so let's play football please ... Even guys using shoulders to hit are getting flagged for helmet-to-helmet. Defense is getting sloppy because guys are avoiding fines and will get worse if suspending comes into play. — Phillip Daniels

My friend created an iPhone app that locates Vienna Beef products across the country. Personally, I came hardwired with an internal GPS that instinctively points me toward coffee shops, cupcake stores and the perfect Chicago-style dog, so I find this technology redundant. — Jen Lancaster

It's okay to be afraid. It's not okay to let the fear STOP you. — Cupcake Brown

It takes forty muscles to frown, and only twelve to jam a cupcake in your mouth and get over it. — Sarah Ockler

By contrast, my method of eating a cupcake was quite straightforward - step one: gobble it down one large bite at a time until there's nothing left. That's it. — Meg Donohue

There's such a buildup of crud in my oven, there's only room to bake a single cupcake. — Phyllis Diller

Oh no, if you really want to be wicked to him, nuke it first. (Geary)
Yeah, but given his reaction to the cupcake, that might overload his taste buds with pleasure and kill him. (Tory) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

<> What kind of parties does she go to - cupcake parties? <> I think she meant beer. <> Oh, right. — Rainbow Rowell

There could be no more welcome sight in the life of a single woman than that of a hunk with a dish towel over his shoulder bringing you a cupcake. — Becky Wade

No! I don't want to Ouija, or do the pendulum thing, and I swear if I see one tarot card or rune stone I'll yack cupcake all over you. (Grace) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

GrayG: Just to clarify, putting the perfectly reasonable and technically correct name aside, shenanigans are a go?
Laughing now, I lean back more comfortably in the ugly plastic airport seat and answer.
IvyMac: All night, Cupcake. I can't wait to taste your frosting.
A couple seconds pass and then,
GrayG: Mac, you sent a dirty text. I just shed a tear of pride. I also have a hard-on. I think the little old lady sitting next to me is checking it out. — Kristen Callihan

There's this secret Korean taco/cupcake truck I go to. To find it, you have to bring a hard-boiled egg to this deli in Bushwick where they give you the address. — Kurt Braunohler

I didn't know until I licked the mocha buttercream from my third devil's food cupcake that this was the flavor of starting over- dark chocolate with that take-charge undercurrent of coffee.
I could actually taste it, feel it. And now I craved it. — Judith Fertig

Marathon: (noun)
A popular form of overpriced torture wherein participants wake up at ass-o-clock in the morning and stand in the freezing cold until it's time to run, at which point they miserably trot for a god-awful interval of time that could be better spent sleeping in and/or consuming large quantities of beer and cupcakes.
See also: masochism, awfulness, "a bunch of bullshit", boob-chafing, cupcake deprivation therapy — Matthew Inman

I checked my phone messages. Three in all.
The first was from Joe. "Hey, Cupcake." That was it. That was the whole message.
The second was from Ranger. "Yo." Ranger made Joe look like a chatterbox. — Janet Evanovich

Can I interest you in a dinner cupcake?" "A dinner cupcake?" he scoffs. "Yes, I accidentally bought five." No one needs to know about the cupcake I've already inhaled. "How does one accidently buy five cupcakes?" His eyes sparkle with amusement. "Don't know." I shrug. "Chalk it up to one of life's many mysteries." "So the cupcakes replace dinner?" "Yes, they cover all the important food groups. Eggs for protein, milk for dairy, flour for the starch." "What about a vegetable?" "I'm sure there's vegetable shortening in the batter or the frosting. — A.C. Netzel

On Saturday, he ate through one piece of chocolate cake, one ice-cream cone, one pickle, one slice of Swiss cheese, one slice of salami, one lollipop, one piece of cherry pie, one sausage, one cupcake, and one slice of watermelon That night he had a stomach ache. — Eric Carle

Those big green eyes were even bigger than usual as she stared at the two of them. For a moment, she looked like a kid who'd found the last cupcake on the planet. — Sophie Oak

Dolores Umbridge may have looked like an iced cupcake, but she was anything but sweet. She — J.K. Rowling

Babe," Ranger said. "You're looking a little strung out. Is there anything I should know?"
I'm on a sugar withdrawal. I've given up desert and it's all I can think about." That had been true five minutes ago. Now that Ranger was standng in front of me I was thinking a cupcake wasn't what I actually needed.
Maybe I can help you get your mind off doughnuts," Ranger said.
My mouth dropped open, and I think some drool might have dribbled out. — Janet Evanovich

What are their names? Psycho and Killer?"
He shook his head. "Cupcake and Twinkie."
My mouth dropped open. "You're kidding."
A grin flitted across his lips. "Afraid not."
If naming them after dessert snacks had been Miss Marva's attempt to make them seem cute, it wasn't working. — Lisa Kleypas

I would love to have Snoop Dogg waiting in my office in a cupcake-print suit to tell all my problems to. Wouldn't we all? — Mindy Kaling

That's it, cupcake. You're going down. — Rick Riordan

America is an enormous frosted cupcake in the middle of millions of starving people. — Gloria Steinem

You better hope she doesn't say a word," Gabe warned, lifting a finger to Uri's nose.
Uri grabbed the finger laughing, "What are you going to do, cupcake? Seduce me to death, in all your sexy glory?"
"Just shut up," Gabe groaned, pushing the door shut in his friend's face. — Wendy Owens

This was like discovering your vanilla cupcake had a chocolate fudge center. — Genevieve Dewey

Mandy's description of "yummy" was so very incorrect. A cupcake was yummy. — Katie Reus

When you look at a cupcake, you've got to smile. — Anne Byrn

Do you want me to call you Celery Stick instead of Cupcake or Honey-Pie? It just doesn't inspire the same warm and fuzzy feelings. — Richelle Mead

These aren't cupcake sprinkles. — Aprilynne Pike

I'd learned not to put a question mark where God put a period. — Cupcake Brown

You are mine, Cupcake. Every part of you. — Sylvia Pierce

Paulie Pastrami learned that a misunderstanding could often be settled with a cupcake. — James Proimos

Cowboy up, cupcake. — Alexandra Fuller

It's a scientific fact that there are only a handful of jobs you're allowed to have if you're one of the leads in a romantic comedy: dog walker, architect, kindergarten teacher, cupcake chef, florist, special needs veterinarian, suspiciously well-paid magazine writer, and independent bookstore owner. So it stands to reason that the likelihood of meeting your soul mate in one is high. — Una LaMarche

Morelli smiled. "It could have been Jenny Ragucci. That makes much more sense. I had good luck with sluts."
I looked over at him.
All in the past," Morelli said. "I'm a cupcake man now."
Whoa, dude," Mooner said. "That's so, like, cosmic. — Janet Evanovich

I wish I could have a cupcake, — Lois Lowry

How you going to stop me, cupcake? Hit me with your book bag?"
"If I have to. — Rachel Caine

You're such a cupcake. — Janet Evanovich

And, no, they haven't done it." I put him out of his misery.
"Done what?" asks Noah.
"Put the sausage in the cupcake," says Lorcan, draining his coffee.
"Lorcan!" I snap. "Don't say things like that!"
Noah explodes with laughter. "Put the sausage in the cupcake!" he crows. "The sausage in the cupcake!"
Great. I glare at Lorcan, who stares back, unmoved. And, anyway, cupcake? I've never heard it called that. — Sophie Kinsella

Always remember the acronym for "FEAR" can mean one of two things: Fuck Everything And Run or Face Everything And Recover. — Cupcake Brown

I am not a fan of the cupcake image. This idea that you can distract a girl with something frivolous like a cake or shoes or handbags, and she won't be a threat to men. — Joanna Trollope

Then why have you been talking about her for the past half hour straight?" His friend glanced over at him, a cheeky grin on his face, and the rockstar glared exaggeratedly.
"I have not."
"You definitely have. I missed an entire episode of Cupcake Wars because you've got a crush. — Andrea D. Smith

I definitely gravitate towards things like vegetables, chicken, brown rice, but I don't deprive myself of anything. If I want a Sprinkles cupcake, I'm having a Sprinkles cupcake. But I'm not going to have one every day ... you just have to have a sensible outlook on all of it. — Abigail Spencer

Things are tough all over, cupcake, an' it rains on the just an' the unjust alike ... except in California. — Alan Moore

Oh, get off the cross!" V shouted when I shared my thoughts with her on the phone. "We need the wood! — Cupcake Brown

You can't just leave a Mississippi Mud Mountain half-eaten! We leave no cupcake behind! — Molly Harper

Thanks for outing me. (Alix)
Anytime, cupcake. Now I'm taking my psychic ass to bed. That door spanked me. (Nero) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

You've gotta be very careful that grace and politeness do not merge into a banality of behavior, where we're just nice, sort of 'death by cupcake.' — Bono

...the Cupcake Nation mentality - "Everyone's a winner!" - is so dangerous. When we try to protect the young from any vaguely uncomfortable ideas or encounters, we do them a grave disservice. Being tested by different viewpoints in my life, being sometimes offended or occasionally hurt, or even targeted, is a big part of what prepared me for the challenged I've faced in my career.., — Megyn Kelly

We post photos of the Halloween costumes and the mustaches made of cupcake frosting. We don't record the tantrums?and that's as it should be. But we shouldn't mistake that for reality. It's stagecraft. — Libby Copeland

A cupcake temple?' Her chest still tight with anxiety, Bertie forced herself to imagine it: bricks of pound cake mortared with buttercream and chocolate ganache, torches like striped birthday candles set into the walls, pilgrims upon the Path of Delectable Righteousness delivering daily tributes of almond paste and raspberry filling ... — Lisa Mantchev

Dylan: What was that? Is Brooke breaking shit now? I know she's upset but she needs to remember where she is,Joey.HANDLE IT.

Sweet Christ. Why couldn,t she be on bed rest at her mother's?

Me: Ease up on the shouty caps,cupcake. Everything is under control.

Dylan:BETTER BE.(I love you)

Me: BITCH.(love you too) — J. Daniels

She talked about wanting to be a part of something, wanting to be desired, to be 'special', craving to be loved. She talked about experiencing the kind of loneliness so immense it could swallow you up. She called it 'loneliness that crowds couldn't cure'. — Cupcake Brown

We can make little cupcakes together. You can be my plus-one. Or it can just be me and you. But you and me is not negotiable. I kind of need you, cupcake. Have ever since I met you." I — Tammy Falkner

Picture this broad: 22 going on 18. Half the guys in my class would have given their left testicle to date her. This cupcake is the guidance counselor the principal has assigned me. Miss Boyle is her name. We all call her "Miss Bubbly Water." Imagine the teasing I have to endure from my friends. Not to mention what it's like, sitting across from this Barbie Doll every Thursday afternoon, watching her cross and uncross her legs, while she's lecturing me about - get this: "staying focused." Right! My pants are on fire, and she's handing me a crash course in Psych 101! — Ted Gargiulo

I was coming down off the last painkiller left in my dresser drawer after Autumn tossed my stash. In that moment I was so groggy and happy I would have accepted a date with Oscar the Grouch - and planned to do some serious feeling up on the green furry beast too. Yeah, stooping to pharmaceutical-inspired sex fantasies about garbage can Sesame Street characters - that had to be the best Just Say No drug lecture a girl in a leg cast could ever receive to make her go cold turkey off the meds. — Rachel Cohn

Over the previous few weeks, I'd finally perfected the Julia St. Clair wedding cupcake: classic lemon cake with a hidden heart of my mom's boldly flavoured passion fruit filling, slathered high with Julia's favorite vanilla buttercream icing and glammed up a bit with sparkling curls of candied lemon rind. — Meg Donohue

About that proposal, cupcake..."
Morelli — Janet Evanovich

When he raises a brow in surprise, I give him a look that must be bordering on feral. "I'm craving a heaping bucket of crispy fried chicken with a side of biscuits like you wouldn't believe." "And she eats," he says to the car. "A girl after my own heart." "Just drive, Cupcake." "Easy now, Special Sauce, I'll get you your chicken. — Anonymous

Instead of asking WHY you had to do it, how about just thanking Him for safely bringing you THROUGH it. — Cupcake Brown

You're only human. You live once and life is wonderful so eat the damn red velvet cupcake! — Emma Stone

You didn't introduce your little cupcake to me. How rude, especially after I've tasted her lips and her fright, her want." He licked his lips again and smiled at me. "All were delicious. — Shelly Crane

Hey! Don't laugh at me for that cupcake thing. I enjoy cupcakes, therefore EVERYONE should enjoy cupcakes. — Ray Toro

Another blond boy came tearing from the opposite direction. "Can't find Smith. But I see you found my cupcake."

"Mine," Cole snapped. Uh, was the cupcake supposed to be me? Because it was a weird nickname for a supposed enemy. — Gena Showalter

I totally let myself indulge, but I make little deals with myself. If I have an extra cupcake, I'll run a couple of extra miles. I think it's all about balance and not getting into extremes with dieting and exercising. Having a healthy attitude is important, too! — Megan Hilty

I'll never turn down a red velvet cupcake. — Shay Mitchell

Mom asked for a cupcake miracle? Well, here comes the freaking holy angel of icing, at your service.
Hudson
Angel icing? That's the craziest, corniest, most whack-ass stuff I've heard in my life — Sarah Ockler

True Love. I'm starting to suspect the concept is pure illusion, an insipid brand name manufactured by Hallmark and Disney. - Cupcake — Rachel Cohn

New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani fired his wife, Donna Hanover, as official hostess of the mayor's mansion last weekend. He's got his own idea of what a hostess should be. He wants a little cupcake. — Argus Hamilton

Come on, Barbie. Please. Do it for your favorite cupcake. — Gena Showalter

My grandmother say you lay down with dogs you get up with fleas. A hard head makes a soft behind. Life is like a box of chocolates you never know what you're going to get. — Cupcake Brown

Hey, heads up. The hottest doctor in town just came by and coerced me into telling him where you were. I folded like a cheap suitcase. Sorry, but he's hard to say no to. Don't be mad. I owe you a cupcake. — Jill Shalvis

Ready for your first lesson, cupcake? — John Corwin

Cupcake, your middle name is trouble. — Janet Evanovich

Happy birthday," she said. "And next time? Eat the stupid cupcake. — Rachel Caine

I've always had a passion for life and I think that translated into a bit of overindulgence. What can I say? I've never met a cupcake I didn't like. — Jasinda Wilder

Coach Hedge shouted, 'Let the movie star go, you big ugly cupcake! Or I'm gonna plant my hoof right up your ... — Rick Riordan

Travel magazines are just one cupcake after another. They're not about travel. The travel magazine is, in fact, about the opposite of travel. It's about having a nice time on a honeymoon, or whatever. — Paul Theroux

In our confusion, we're accustomed to according the titles of good news and "a positive message" to the most soul-sucking, sentimental fare imaginable. Any song or story that deals with conflict by way of a strained euphemistic spin, a cliche, or a triumphal cupcake ending strikes us as the best in family entertainment. This is the opposite of apocalyptic. Apocalyptic maximizes the reality of human suffering and folly before daring a word of hope. The hope has nowhere else to happen but the valley of the shadow of death. — David Dark

It's hard not to smile when you're going eyeball to eyeball with a frosted chocolate cupcake. — Shannon Wiersbitzky

I let that swim around in my aching head for a few minutes - "the arsenal of megadeath ... the arsenal of megadeath" - and then, for some reason I can't quite explain, I began to write. Using a borrowed pencil and a cupcake wrapper, I wrote the first lyrics of my post-Metallica life. This song was called "Megadeth" (I dropped the second "a"), and though it would never find its way onto an album, it did serve as the basis for the song "Set the World Afire." It hadn't occured to me then that Megadeth-as used by Senator Cranston, megadeath referred to the loss of one million lives as a result of nuclear holocaust-might be a perfectly awesome name for a thrash metal band. — Dave Mustaine

The dimple in his left cheek was ironic-it gave the impression that he was sweet as a cupcake. (Dark City Lights) — Elaine Kagan

Some breakfast cereals only come into their own as children's party treats: what are cornflakes and Coco Pops for, if not to clump together with melted chocolate and spoon into a cupcake holder? — Yotam Ottolenghi

Life is biting into a cupcake and finding an eyeball at its center. — Alexandra Sirowy

A cupcake is like a great pop song. The whole world in less than three minutes. And it's impossible to have a bad cupcake. In New York you walk everywhere. So I'm always looking, always on the eternal search for the perfect cupcake. I take them very seriously. It's like hunting and gathering for me. — Laurel Nakadate

Given the choice between eating this cupcake or watching Ryan Gosling and Jon Hamm wrestle each other for the privilege of having sex with me, I'd choose the cupcake. — Lisa Kleypas

People I had never seen before flocked in, their faces showing a longing you never saw for cake. People's eyes lit up for a cupcake, cake seemed to signal celebration. But their eyes got filmy, watery, misty when we handed them a slice of pie. Pie was memory. Nostalgia. Pie made people recall simpler, maybe happier times. — Judith Fertig

We do have a love fest [at home]. It's like, 'I'm making you a cupcake.' Then it's like, 'Well, I made you a cake.' And it's like, 'Well I made you a cake with a cupcake on top and candles.' — Dianna Agron

Hell-on-skis, can you hear me? This is flying cupcake. — Joss Stirling

A cupcake is just a muffin with clown puke topping. And once you've got through the clown puke there's nothing but a fistful of quotidian sponge nestling in a depressing, soggy 'cup' that feels like a pair of paper knickers a fat man has been sitting in throughout a long, hot coach journey between two disappointing market towns. — Charlie Brooker