Crunchy Granola Quotes & Sayings

Judith insisted he attend some crunchy little granola academy where all plastic is forbidden and all the teachers wear thick wool socks and old sandals. — John Grisham

What's amazing is that we have largely contained these urges to the point of successfully checking out of a crowded Whole Foods without decapitating that crunchy, granola-haired hustler dude trying to squeak fourteen items through the express lane WHEN THE SIGN CLEARLY STATES "TWELVE ITEMS OR LESS." YOU THINK WE AREN'T ALL GOING TO BE COUNTING YOUR FUCKING ITEMS, BRO?! — Nick Offerman

I'm one of those girls that cries at the drop of a hat. I'm oversensitive, if anything. I'm a mom. I'm very earthy, crunchy granola. I compost. — Alysia Reiner

Drop your shrink and stop your drinkin', crunchy granola's neat. — Neil Diamond

Nikhilananda's birthday. Maybe we'd Morris dance, naked, around the base of an old-growth California redwood, its branches lavishly festooned with the soiled hammocks and poop buckets of crunchy-granola tree sitters mentoring spotted owls in passive-resistance protest techniques. You get the picture. In place of Santa Claus, my mom and dad said Maya Angelou kept tabs on whether little children were naughty or nice. Dr. Angelou, they warned me, did her accounting on a long hemp scroll of names, and if I failed to turn my compost I'd be sent to bed with no algae. Me, I just wanted to know that someone wise and carbon neutral - Dr. Maya or Shirley Chisholm or Sean Penn - was paying attention. But none of that was really Christmas. And none of that Earth First! baloney helps out once you're dead and you discover that the snake-handling, — Chuck Palahniuk