Craziest Hilarious Quotes & Sayings

Everyone has a self-destructive nature in them. It's whether you feed it or not. You don't have to be a pop star to feel connected to destruction or self-destruction. But self-destruction is self-obsession, and self-obsession is not really possible if you're engaged in raising children. And if you have a spiritual life, you're constantly being asked to see yourself as one small fragment in the bigger picture. — Madonna Ciccone

I myself recently dreamed that a UFO came speeding towards me which turned out to be the lens of a magic lantern whose projected image was myself; this suggested to me that I was the figure, himself deep in meditation, who is produced by a meditating yogi. — C. G. Jung

I am writing to apply for the position of bookkeeper. Attached, you will find my list of qualifications. I have been keeping books for four years now, and I am never going to give them back. — Joey Comeau

I love to cook. And I love food. I'd probably work with animals. Interior design, I'm very into that. — Gloria Votsis

I worked very hard, but I think it's unfair to make it all sound like it's all David's fault. — Liza Minnelli

Once I had asked God for one or two extra inches in height, but instead he made me as tall as the sky, so high that I could not measure myself. — Malala Yousafzai

Be brave with your life, so others will be brave with theirs. — Katherine Center

The mathematical thermology created by Fourier may tempt us to hope that, as he has estimated the temperature of the space in which we move, me may in time ascertain the mean temperature of the heavenly bodies: but I regard this order of facts as for ever excluded from our recognition. We can never learn their internal constitution, nor, in regard to some of them, how heat is absorbed by their atmosphere. We may therefore define Astronomy as the science by which we discover the laws of the geometrical and mechanical phenomena presented by the heavenly bodies. — Auguste Comte

Graciousness is the luxury of the wise, — Patrick Rothfuss

Leonardo is the Hamlet of art history whom each of us must recreate for himself. — Kenneth Clark

Facebook is made up of people you've met, but not necessarily who are similar to you. I have 850 'friends,' and a lot are acquaintances, not friends. I don't really know them. If I've met someone one time, how should they be influencing my feed? — Garrett Camp

You instantly become less selfish. You can't be the biggest person in the world anymore-they are. [Motherhood] really grounds you. — Keri Russell

[ ... ]to be real
to become fluent, natural, to cut out the detour that sweeps us around what's fundamental to events, preventing us from touching their core: the detour that makes us all second-hand and second-rate. — Tom McCarthy

Our evangelical culture tends to take the awesome reality of a transcendent god who is worthy to be feared and downsize Him so He could fit into our "buddy system." The way we talk about Him, the way we pray, and, more strikingly, the way we live shows that we have somehow lost our sense of being appropriately awestruck in the presence of a holy and all-powerful God. It's been a long time since we've heard a good sermon on the "fear of God." If God were to show up visibly, many of us think we'd run up to Him and high-five Him for the good things He has done. — Joseph Stowell