Camping Humor Quotes & Sayings

White people love rock climbing almost more than they love camping. This is
because the activity affords them the opportunity to be outside, to use a carabiner for something other than their keys, and to purchase a whole new set of expensive activity-specific clothing and accessories. — Christian Lander

In a well-ordered universe ... camping would take place indoors. — Morgan Matson

My fear of camping: I'm convinced bugs will crawl up my vagina and lay eggs. Isn't everyone? — Kathy Griffin

The first stage of camping always involves a trip to an outdoor equipment store like REI. These stores are well known for their abundance of white customers and their extensive inventory of things for white people to buy and only use once. — Christian Lander

Holmes and Watson are on a camping trip. In the middle of the night Holmes wakes up and gives Dr. Watson a nudge. "Watson" he says, "look up in the sky and tell me what you see."
"I see millions of stars, Holmes," says Watson.
"And what do you conclude from that, Watson?"
Watson thinks for a moment. "Well," he says, "astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meterologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I see that God is all-powerful, and we are small and insignficant. Uh, what does it tell you, Holmes?"
"Watson, you idiot! Someone has stolen our tent! — Thomas Cathcart

Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business. — Dave Barry

Canoe + waterfall = I don't go camping anymore. — Demetri Martin

The problem with winter sports is that
follow me closely here
they generally take place in winter. — Dave Barry

I swear there are about a million rocks underneath me," [Dylan] said grouchily.
Think of it as therapeutic. Like a shiatsu massage." (Sadie)
You obviously have a much better imagination than me," he said. — Sarah Mayberry

I'm never going to live this down. I will forever be known as the pastor's kid who got arrested, made friends in jail, and threw up on the singles camping trip. That will look great on a resume. — A.C. Williams

I went camping and borrowed a circus tent by mistake. I didn't notice until I got it set up. People complained because they couldn't see the lake. — Steven Wright

Liebenthal's camping, and he's got more dakka than you. You're fucked if you go in together.
Claire Ashecroft — Matthew Graybosch