Best Alfred Batman Quotes & Sayings

Show some respect. They were your grandparents. -Batman
Just names and dusty frames on the wall to me. -Damien
I take exception to that. There is not a speck of dust collecting on those portraits. -Alfred — Peter J. Tomasi

Alfred: Are you alright?
Batman: I'm going to need a better car. Police are here. They'll pick up the others.
Alfred: And they'll probably be back on the streets by sunrise thanks to Harvey Dent. I know you don't want to hear it, but if you want to make Gotham a safer place we need to rethink how we're going to do that. You should come home now. Dinner's gonna get cold.
Batman: Don't tell me it's cottage pie again.
Alfred:...I'll order a pizza. — Geoff Johns

Bryn ate her bagel in silence, and by the time she was finished, Liam had already neatly packed her overnight bag and loaded it in MacAllister's car. He even included a new dog bed for Mr. French to travel in confort. Lunch was in moducal little boxes.
"I think he is Alfred."
"Actually, I often wonder if he's Batman. — Rachel Caine

Alfred: Hmf. I suppose you'll take up flying next, like that fellow in Metropolis. — Frank Miller

Batman: What do you think Alfred?
Alfred: I think you're a bad driver.
Batman: I've got Lucius looking into another car-
Alfred: Well you're going to need one if you actually want to catch these blokes. Tea's on the table behind you. — Geoff Johns

Alfred, I need ice and that vitamin K goop. To the nursery. Stat."
"I loathe you, Master Griffin," came a British accent over the intercom.
"Thanks, Alfred," Griffin answered and came back to the bed.
"Is your butler's name really Alfred?"
"No. It's Jamison, I think. Can't remember. I changed it to Alfred years ago. My first crush on a dude was Batman ... — Tiffany Reisz