Beano Quotes & Sayings

I was very pleased to get a Supreme Court justice suggesting a column, so I went and did a column about Beano. I went with my wife and another guy to a Mexican restaurant, which we thought would be the ultimate test for an antiflatulance product. There's a reason most of Mexico is located out of doors. And it worked. Several newspapers refused to run that column. But they did run advertisements for Beano. — Dave Barry

You only have to bat 1.000 in two things-flying and heart transplants. Everything else, you can go four in five. — Beano Cook

The first word you see at the airport is 'terminal'. — Beano Cook

You'll never have a 16-team playoff in college football. The most that could happen would be four teams in the next century. But after that, I'm dead, so who cares? — Beano Cook

My dream was to draw for 'The Beano.' When I was 10 years old, I started drawing cartoon strips with 'The Beano' in mind. I lived in that world. You own a comic, it's yours and adults don't understand it. You could pile them up under the bed, and if you were off school ill, you'd go through them all. — Nick Park

Best scene in college football is at LSU on a Saturday night. — Beano Cook

One minute walking along, the next minute dead. Why?"
THINK OF IT BEING MORE ... DIMENSIONALLY DISADVANTAGED.
"Yes. I know." Beano relaxed, and stopped wondering too much about events in an increasingly irrelevant world. Death found that people often did, after the initial confusion. After all, the worst had already happened. At least ... with any luck. — Terry Pratchett

So how big were his teeth? Are we talking big bad wolf?"
"Did you read The Beano when you were a kid?"
"Yeah, once or twice."
"Picture Dennis the Menace's dog Gnasher with an elderly human face and you've nailed Norman. I think he must have been a larger man when he had the choppers made. His face has shrunk with age, but the teeth have stayed the same. — Fabian Black

Ron Powlus will win the Heisman two times and be the greatest quarterback in the history of Notre Dame. — Beano Cook

Dracula and LSU Football are at their best after the sun goes down. — Beano Cook

My first on the bucket list will be a night game at LSU. I don't know if I'm ever going to get there. Of all the things in college sports, that would be No. 1. — Beano Cook

Beano, buying the Globe and Mail, the National Post, the Calgary — Douglas Kennedy

Nebraska sets the standard for how fans should act. — Beano Cook

I hate it. I just do. That [artificial turf], local news, the IRS, and hair dryers are the four worst inventions of the century. — Beano Cook