Barry Quotes & Sayings

Barry Bonds is outspoken. I think that the people of Pittsburgh felt, it's a syndrome of you've got to apologize for being successful if you're successful (as well as) black and outspoken. — Dave Parker

He was the average guy. Maurice, I think, reflected every man. — Barry Gibb

Today's scientific question is: What in the world is electricity? And where does it go after it leaves the toaster? — Dave Barry

The environmental crisis is a signal of this approaching catastrophe. — Barry Commoner

Unless you live in Indonesia, there should be several malls within five miles of your home. It makes no difference whatsoever which one you go to: Under federal law, all malls in the United States must have the same 42 chain stores. — Dave Barry

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. — Dave Barry

All forms of commerce are adversarial. — Barry Diller

Every day is an adventure, or it's just some thing you do. It's your choice. — Barry L. Hughes

I am an artist who works very well under pressure, in fact. I like to have deadlines. — Robert Barry

I am very easy. I like to have my work out. I am not restrictive about any of that. It is the collectors that are possessive, not me, not me. — Robert Barry

Street artists need to get back to actually doing things on the streets instead of in the galleries where they all seem to be ending up. I hope this term 'street artist' falls from the face of the earth, in my honest opinion. — Barry McGee

The obvious and fair solution to the housework problem is to let men do the housework for, say, the next six thousand years, to even things up. The trouble is that men, over the years, have developed an inflated notion of the importance of everything they do, so that before long they would turn housework into just as much of a charade as business is now. They would hire secretaries and buy computers and fly off to housework conferences in Bermuda, but they'd never clean anything. — Dave Barry

adding options can be detrimental to our well-being. Because we don't put rejected options out of our minds, — Barry Schwartz

I realize that some of you may be skeptical about the idea of reincarnation, but there's a lot of evidence that it's real. Exhibit A is Vice President Al Gore, who obviously, at some point in his previous existence, was a slab of Formica. — Dave Barry

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning "ability to," and bics, meaning "withstand tremendous boredom. — Dave Barry

I think everyone needs to be a role model, period. — Barry Bonds

Ring!" he shrieked at the vapid instrument. — Barry Hannah

The population of earth has reached 7 billion people, every single one of whom send you irritating emails to join something called "LinkedIn." — Dave Barry

I thought they may have presumed too much knowledge of certain things for people who are not comedians. Like Montreal. A comic understands what it is and its importance, but someone else may not know about it. — Todd Barry

If I can keep writing just one good page a day, I will have 15 published novels in my expected lifetime. Tick, tick, tick... — Barry James Hickey

I mean, I guess I realized subconsciously that this is what I should be doing before I realized it, consciously. Verbally, I don't think I had committed to it, even though I was driving everywhere, every night, just trying to get on stage. — Todd Barry

Playing and fun are not the same thing, though when we grow up we may forget that and find ourselves mixing up playing with happiness. There can be a kind of amnesia about the seriousness of playing, especially when we played by ourselves. — Lynda Barry

I'm never absolutely sure of anything, and I don't want to be. You're either right and you'll pull through, or you're not. We're never going to be right about everything, and we've certainly been wrong. — Barry Diller

But paper and ink have conjuring abilities of their own. arrangements of lines and shapes, of letters and words on a series of pages make a world we can dwell and travel in. — Lynda Barry

What interests me is starting businesses on our own, finding ideas that we can support, and simply investing in invention. — Barry Diller

would show that inside twenty-one feet against a knife, trying to get a gun out is typically a losing bet, especially if you're backing straight up rather than getting off the line. — Barry Eisler

We hadn't lost morale. But when you fight for four quarters, it's tough to always bounce back. The offense kept us in the game the last two weeks and to get out with a win feels really good. — Barry Alvarez

Miser Shen is preparing to spend the night with a goat. — Barry Hughart

I look crazy. I know I do. Been true since I was a kid! — Lynda Barry

Across the continent, political divisions are deepening. For all of these reasons, the specter of a euro zone collapse has not been dispatched. — Barry Eichengreen

I wouldn't buy somebody's album on a dare if they called him a musician's musician. I don't write to be a writer's writer. I don't want to be like the little-magazine writer. — Barry Hannah

Koinonia is often translated by the word "fellowship," but that is too thin a word for many of us (especially those with memories of bad potluck dinners in the fellowship hall). Koinonia is a rich word that refers to shared life lived in intimate community. It is sharing one another's joys and burdens. It is walking together in the details of daily life. Apart from a deep experience of koinonia, our corporate worship gathering too easily devolves into a kind of individual spectator experience that we all happen to have in the same time and place week after week. — Barry D. Jones

I bought Windows 2.0, Windows 3.0, Windows 3.1415926, Windows 95, Windows 98, Windows ME, Windows RSVP, The Best of Windows, Windows Strikes Back, Windows Does Dallas, and Windows Let's All Buy Bill Gates a House the Size of Vermont. — Dave Barry

Because it strikes me there is something greater than judgement. I think it is called mercy. — Sebastian Barry

There's tremendous pressure, if you're in that [goverment] system, to be involved and be interested and to care about it. There's no room to say, "This is stupid." — Dave Barry

If everybody in this town connected with politics had to leave town because of chasing women and drinking, you would have no government. — Barry Goldwater

Love thinks the best, even when the best might not be true. — Barry Stagner

Barry Goldwater once said, 'I'd rather be right than president.' I can't tell you how much I disagree with that Barry Goldwater. — Howard Dean

Paloma you cry out, you beg for connection
The dreams you seek are straight ahead in every direction — Barry Privett

I actually kind of like Janet Reno. She seems like a nice enough lady. But when you're basically going through the entire phone book trying to find women lawyers who don't have maids to pick the attorney general of the United States, how well can you do? — Dave Barry

In the history of the concept of number has been adjective (three cows, three monads) and noun (three, pure and simple), and now ... number seems to be more like a verb (to triple). — Barry Mazur

I think one of my highpoints was definitely well, everything started turning around on Barry Manilow week. I had so much fun on disco week, love disco music. I think I picked some songs that really worked for me and people really enjoyed them. I loved doing the Donna Summers song and she was the guest judge, and she was the guest judge and I felt honored. She said she loved the song and said I made it my own. — Diana DeGarmo

This year, U.S. airlineswill carry a record 143 million passengers, who will be in the air for 382 million hours, during which they will be fed an estimated total of four peanuts. — Dave Barry

[Lynda's mother] You're stupid and you don't know it, that's you're problem. You talk, talk, talk, all the time. No one wants to listen to an idiot.

[Young Lynda] Uh. OK. Thanks, Mom. — Lynda Barry

Avoid the traffic by using one of the park's shuttle buses and view the elk rut with a park ranger. — Dave Barry

My parents were very pleased that I was in the army. The fact that I hated it somehow pleased them even more. — Barry Humphries

A hedge fund manager whose clients demand monthly performance reports has different needs than any individual investors with a 20-year time horizon. The needs of that long-term investor differ markedly from someone who is retiring in three years. — Barry Ritholtz

As awkward as it sounds. I'm not Shane Larkin, Barry Larkin's son, anymore. It's Barry Larkin, the father of Shane Larkin. — Shane Larkin

Later, I even appeared in a Rock Opera with Richard Gere. — Barry Bostwick

Jazz closed his eyes. — Barry Lyga

I do love to eavesdrop. It's inspirational, not only for subject matter but for actual dialogue, the way people talk. — Lynda Barry

Based on a lifetime of observations and a few decades in the markets, I understand that societies, beliefs and fashions all move in long arcs of time. We call these arcs several things: cycles, periods, eras. — Barry Ritholtz

In high school I had B's and C's, not too many A's, but I must have done well on that medical school test, and I must have had some charisma in the interview, so I ended up in medicine. Being a general practitioner was all I aspired to. — Barry Marshall

I never wanted to be a performer, that was not one of my goals. I wanted to be a musician and that was that. — Barry Manilow

Companies like GE and Procter & Gamble have been in business for a long time. Over decades or a century you're bound to figure out a management structure that works. — Barry Diller

I can't recall a story that played out exactly as I'd expected it to. That's one of the thrills of journalism - being surprised, and learning new stuff, but it also poses the biggest challenge to a writer's character. — Dave Barry

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admit that we know of no better system, except possibly flipping a coin. — Dave Barry

If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales? — Dave Barry

No man can teach another self-knowledge. He can only lead him or her up to self-discovery - the source of truth. — Barry Long

Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. This is also true of religion, although you will not find me saying so in print. — Dave Barry

I lost my second marriage because of drinking, and I loved the woman very much. But I thought I needed booze to write. I'm glad I was disabused. — Barry Hannah

This praise, though far from fulsome, gave me pleasure and that is to my shame. But there was something in him, some power of spirit, that made me want to please him. Perhaps, it occurs to me now, it was no more than the intensity of his wish. Men are distinguished by the power of their wanting. What this one wanted became his province and his meal, he governed it and fed on it from the first moment of desire. Besides, with the perversity of our nature, being tested had made me more desire to succeed, though knowing the enterprise to be sinful. — Barry Unsworth

I promise you a police car on every sidewalk. — Marion Barry

Going on Letterman is like going off the high dive. It's exhilarating, but after a while it wasn't the kind of thrill I enjoyed. — Lynda Barry

This is not a sham, not a game. This is the real stuff. — Marion Barry

I get tips from Bob Gaudio. And one of my songs somehow caught the attention of one of my idols, Marty Panzer, who wrote big hits for Barry Manilow. So two guys who inspired me to write lyrics are now teaching me to write. — Erich Bergen

I was freelancing for years in Cork and around. I also wrote freelance pieces for 'The Irish Times.' — Kevin Barry

A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. — Dave Barry

The idea of making the industry live up to its legal responsibility is not going to die. — John M Barry

One of the things you have to do when you edit your work is make sure that when you use the first person, it's about more than you. We need the story of us. — Barry Lopez

Polarities to manage are sets of opposites that can't function well independently. Because the two sides of a polarity are interdependent, you cannot choose one as a "solution" and neglect the other. The objective of the Polarity Management perspective is to get the best of both opposites while avoiding the limits of each. — Barry Johnson

The cold view to take of our future is that we are therefore headed for extinction in a universe of impersonal chemical, physical, and biological laws. A more productive, certainly more engaging view, is that we have the intelligence to grasp what is happening, the composure not to be intimidated by its complexity, and the courage to take steps that may bear no fruit in our lifetimes. — Barry Lopez

We attempt to conceal ourselves, Emily, but the truth is we do not entirely want to be concealed. We want to be found. — Max Barry

The crowd think that Todd handled the ball ... they must have seen something that nobody else did. — Barry Davies

About 90 percent of the downtime comes from, at most, 10 percent of the defects. — Barry Boehm

Database: the information you lose when your memory crashes. — Dave Barry

The Lampoon was definitely quite formative. You know there's a crazy like kind of network of comedy writers from The Lampoon that are, that kind of you know like Seinfeld and The Simpsons and a lot of shows kind of had a lot of kind of Lampoon writers and so that was very formative. I mean, to me I got interested in comedy writing at an early like reading like Dave Barry. — Nicholas Stoller

I didn't say, "I'll call you." I didn't hug her because of the wet clothes. Just a quick kiss. Then I turned and left. I made my way quietly down the hallway to the stairwell. I could tell she thought she wasn't going to see me again. I had to admit she might be right. The knowledge was as damp and dispiriting as my sodden clothes. I came to the first floor and looked out at the entranceway of the building. For a second I pictured the way she had hugged me here. It already seemed like a long time ago. I felt an unpleasant mixture of gratitude and longing, streaked with guilt and regret. And in a flash of insight, cutting with cold clarity through the fog of my fatigue, I realized what I hadn't been able to articulate earlier, not even to myself, when she'd asked me what I was afraid of. It had been this, the moment after, when I would come face to face with knowing that it would all end badly, if not this morning, then the next one. Or the one after that. — Barry Eisler

You can only get next to God through the effort of preparation. To experience the uncreated, the state of awareness will have to be held for several minutes. You are then between time and the time-less - waiting for the unknown, which will come but cannot be willed. — Barry Long

I'm particularly proud of my reluctance to share my dreams with anyone. — Todd Barry

Turbulence: This is what pilots announce that you have encountered when your plane strikes an object in midair. You'll be flying along, and there will be an enormous, shuddering WHUMP, and clearly the plane has rammed into an airborne object at least the size of a water buffalo, and the pilot will say, "Folks, we're encountering a little turbulence." Meanwhile they are up there in the cockpit trying desperately to clean water buffalo organs off the windshield. — Dave Barry

Librarians are amazing like that. They will hand you a book they know will make your eyes bug out because they know that is the point of novels, not to satisfy but to surprise. — Max Barry

I could have ended the war in a month. I could have made North Vietnam look like a mud puddle. — Barry Goldwater

The more boring a newspaper is, the more it is respected. The most respected newspaper in the United States is The New York Times, which has thousands of reporters constantly producing enormous front-page stories about bauxite ... The [New York] Post would write about bauxite only if famous celebrites were arrested for snorting it in an exclusive Manhattan nightclub. — Dave Barry

The story of the eighties will be the story of the Reagan administration and the many men and women who served in it, some of whom are already out on parole. — Dave Barry

If this were a fairy tale, that meant the dragon had been slain. Or hadn't arrived yet. — Barry Webster

It always rains on tents. Rainstorms will travel thousands of miles, against prevailing winds for the opportunity to rain on a tent. — Dave Barry

You should never pick up a newspaper when you're feeling good, because every newspaper has a special department, called the Bummer Desk, which is responsible for digging up depressing front-page stories. — Dave Barry

Whoever you are, be that person with all your might. Time goes by faster than we thought. It is a thief so quiet. You must let yourself be loved and you must love, parts of you that never loved must open and love. You must announce yourself in all particulars so you can have yourself. — Barry Hannah

No latitude makes any difference to what men will do to other men, whether for gain or in the name of justice. — Barry Unsworth

If it had been a great necessity, if it had been contingents of an army meeting to overwhelm the enemy by stealth, it might not have worked out so neatly. But fate it would seem is a perfect strategist and will work miracles of timing to assist our destruction. — Sebastian Barry

I think every coach has to adapt to what they have, because they're what you get. You can't just go out to the player tree and pick all the great ones. That doesn't happen. You get a Barry Sanders every now and then. You get a Billy Sims every once in a while. And when you have it, you adapt to their strengths. Whoever comes in here and whoever has this job needs to adapt and will do that. — Matt Millen

The trouble is, you cannot grow just one zucchini. Minutes after you plant a single seed, hundreds of zucchini will barge out of the ground and sprawl around the garden, menacing the other vegetables. At night, you will be able to hear the ground quake as more and more zucchinis erupt. — Dave Barry

I shall listen to my heart and it shall save me. I shall listen to my heart and I'll be free. — Barry Webster

You cannot paint the exterior of your house. You have to take the paint chip down to show the paint-chip Nazis. — Dave Barry

I don't play the lottery. I don't care what my horoscope says. I think most things about the world could be improved if people thought more about what they're doing. When someone gets upset with their computer, I tend to side with the computer. I think art is overrated, and bridges are underrated. In fact, I don't understand why bridges aren't art. It seems to me they're penalized for having a use. If I make a bridge that ends in midair, that's a sculpture. But put it between two landmasses and let it ferry two hundred thousand cars per day and it's infrastructure. That makes no sense. — Max Barry

Don't wait for your employees to seek you out. Choose to be assertive and go to them first. — Barry Banther

Only way to live here is day by day, same as anywhere. — Barry Unsworth

I prefer music but sometimes if there's on talk radio - someone might be on that I like. I listen to the old - to "Air America," down at the - liberal talk shows and things like that I find kind of nice, their criticizing the conservatives. I find that quite relaxing, entertaining, but music, a lot of music. — Robert Barry

Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary to what you may have heard, the Internet does not operate at the speed of light; it operates at the speed of the DMV. — Dave Barry