Quotes & Sayings About Barbecue

A hint of red there and a dose of heat to sear the skin - mmm, barbecue. Not funny, you sick bastard. As Wes rebuked his inner gator, he slapped himself, only to hear a voice he never thought to hear again after last night. "You're slapping the wrong part of your body. Why don't you stand up and I'll help you get the right spot?" Melanie. What is she doing here? — Eve Langlais

As for restaurants, one of our favorites is the Silk Road next door to the Tibetan Choijin Lama Museum. It's a very exotic setting. The western food there is pretty good. We also liked the Hazara Restaurant for its Indian food, and the Mongolian Barbecue restaurant. All are downtown. — Ruth Lor Malloy

Adding two or three chunks of wood to the coals adds a great smoke flavor to meat. I prefer pecan wood, which adds a mellow smoke flavor, but any good wood will work. And most barbecue sections in stores and supermarkets around the country, like Walmart, sell hickory wood, which adds a heavier smoke flavor. Oak is also a good option for a mellow smoke flavor. — Johnny Trigg

NEW YORK- A 2-yearold girl who wandered away from a holiday weekend family barbecue in a city park was found dead in a lake after a desperate five-hour search by police and bystanders. — Anonymous

Her nerves gathered together so quickly, Gennie nearly dropped the five pounds of briquettes on the ground. When she'd finished being exasperated with herself, she laughed and poured a neat pile of charcoal into the barbecue pit. So this was the coolly sophisticated Genvieve Grandeau, she thought wryly;established member of the art world and genteel New Orleans society,about to drop five pounds of charcoal on her toes because a rude man was going to have dinner with her. How the mighty have fallen. — Nora Roberts

I have spent a good part of my life looking for the perfect barbecue. There is no point in looking in places like Texas, where they put some kind of ketchup on beef and call it barbecue. Barbecue is pork, which narrows the search to the South, and if it's really good pork barbecue you are looking for, to North Carolina. — Charles Kuralt

As they wove their way through the crowded street, they passed numerous barbecue tents, the focus of the festival, after all. Inside the tents, the barbecue sandwiches were made in an assembly line. Sauce, no sauce? Coleslaw on your sandwich? Want hush puppies in a cup with that? The sandwiches could be seen in the hands of every other person on the street, half-wrapped in foil. There were also tents selling pork rinds and boiled corn on the cob, chicken on a stick and brats, and, of course, funnel cakes. — Sarah Addison Allen

In America, diner food or roadside barbecue is the best road food, but I am not a fan of eating while driving - too messy. — Jose Andres

An idiotic vitch like you
Must rrroast upon the barbecue! — Roald Dahl

Dancing is my number one love. That was my first goal as a child. I would love to do stage, maybe do Chicago. I love being in front of an audience. It's so stimulating. I also love to barbecue. — Carmen Electra

What's that supposed to mean? A wolf's head on a stick. Big wolf barbecue tonight? Bring your own wolf? — Eoin Colfer

Honey, have you seen my measuring tape?"
"I think it's in that drawer in the kitchen with the scissors, matches, bobby pins, Scotch tape, nail clippers, barbecue tongs, garlic press, extra buttons, old birthday cards, soy sauce packets thick rubber bands, stack of Christmas napkins, stained take-out menus, old cell-phone chargers, instruction booklet for the VCR, some assorted nickels, an incomplete deck of cards, extra chain links for a watch, a half-finished pack of cough drops, a Scrabble piece I found while vacuuming, dead batteries we aren't fully sure are dead yet, a couple screws in a tiny plastic bag left over from the bookshelf, that lock with the forgotten combination, a square of carefully folded aluminum foil, and expired pack of gum, a key to our old house, a toaster warranty card, phone numbers for unknown people, used birthday candles, novelty bottle openers, a barbecue lighter, and that one tiny little spoon."
"Thanks, honey."
AWESOME! — Neil Pasricha

Another way I like to barbecue king salmon is as a whole fish stuffed, literally to the gills, with sweet onions, sliced lemons, and summer sage. — Tom Douglas

Friends may come and go, but barbecues accumulate. — Thomas Jones

I really enjoy sailing on Lake Geneva because I can just look at the shore and see my wife having a barbecue with the kids. — Ernesto Bertarelli

I love New York, but am happy to be away from it. I really like small towns, with welcoming barbecue restaurants. — David Burnett

Although I grew up in Kansas City, ... I have always kept more or less au courant of Texas barbecue, like a sports fan who is almost monomaniacally obsessed with basketball but glances over at the N.H.L. standings now and then. — Calvin Trillin

They'd run all these tests on him and decided he wasn't racist. He wasn't, either, but not because he thought about it particularly. He just couldn't see the point. It just made for a lot of hassle, being that way, so why be that way? Nobody was going to go back and live where they lived before, were they, and if they did (he vaguely suspected) there wouldn't be any Mongolian barbecue and maybe we'd all be listening to Pentecostal Metal and anyway the President was black. — William Gibson

One thing that has been fascinating to me is the exploding interest in traditional American barbecue in Europe. We Americans have historically always imported food ideas from other places, and now we are exporting this gastronomic treasure called barbecue. — Steven Raichlen

Thanks, you guys." Fiona smiled. "I haven't been with anyone since Jackson and I split. I hate to act like such a hoochie mama, but
"
"Hey. There's a little hoochie mama in all of us," Charli said. "Didn't I tell you how I finally got Reno to make the big move?"
"No."
"The famous Wilder barbecue party? While we were dancing, I conveniently told him I'd forgotten to put panties on under my dress. He could barely keep his hands to himself. Then I told him if he was interested, I'd meet him back at his house."
"Oooh, devious." Abby laughed. "Was there any rubber left on his tires?"
"Nope." Charli grinned. "But that was one hoochie-mama move I'll never regret. — Candis Terry

I love barbecue, it's my favorite thing to eat. — David Nail

So, yeah, his people wouldn't have just frowned on his sex life; they would have handled him only with barbecue tongs while wearing a Hazmat suit and a welding mask — J.R. Ward

Uncle Jeff insisted that I also take a tray of unseasoned barbecue, so I could see for myself that what's going on here at the Skylight Inn does not in any way, shape, or form depend for it's flavor or quality on "sauce." That is a word he pronounces with an upturned lip and a slight sneer, suggesting that the use of barbecue sauce was at best a culinary crutch deserving of pity and at worst a moral failing. — Michael Pollan

You can go super American and get barbecue and beer and be like, 'Whatever, I'm watching a football game.' That's exactly what I'm going to do. — Emily Ratajkowski

To barbecue is a way of life rather than a desirable method of cooking. — Clement Freud

Ooo, let's see, I need to get my spicy barbecue sauce. Definitely some oven mitts, 'cause he's gonna be hot from being flame-broiled. I need to get a couple of them apple trees to make wood chips so the meat be nice and appley tasting. Give it that extra yumminess, 'cause I don't like that Daimon flavor. Ack! (Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I'm a known fugitive who likes to set people on fire. Come away with me so we can have hot sex while the entire city is trying to shoot me in the head. If I get bored, I'll barbecue you for my amusement. Sure, let me get my shoes. — Ilona Andrews

I was struggling happily with my ribs. Normally I ended up with barbecue sauce in my socks when I ate ribs, but I always figured they were worth it. — Robert B. Parker

You slammed my face down on the barbecue grill, now my scars are all healing, but my heart never will. — Al Yankovic

Oh, no," Simi said. "We can't have that. Where you going, Mr. Meanie-Pants? You don't hurt people then run. That's just rude." She looked back at Caleb. "Can the Simi barbecue him, or is he on the 'No Simi' eat list? — Sherrilyn Kenyon

In North Carolina, barbecue means pork, child. Hot dogs and hamburgers on a grill - that's called 'cooking out' around here, — Sarah Addison Allen

Most of us spend our lives convinced that there's something missing: "If only I had a bigger barbecue, more money, a bigger car, a different wife, a different ... If only I could upgrade somehow, then I would be okay." — Arjuna Ardagh

My favorite moments? Where it's all going swimmingly, the sun's out and I've got a fire going and a nice snake on the barbecue. — Bear Grylls

Maybe I should do this for y-" (Samantha)
"No, I'm cooking. If you want to be helpful, you can bring me my wine. I poured us both a glass." (Mortimer)
"But-"
"No," he insisted, pushing her toward the door. "In you go. I'm the man. I get to barbecue while you stand around and look cute. — Lynsay Sands

I'm the enemy because I like to think. I like to read. I'm into freedom of speech and freedom of choice. I'm the kind of guy that could sit in a greasy spoon and wonder, gee, should I have the T-bone steak or the jumbo rack of barbecue ribs or the side order of gravy fries? I want high cholesterol. I would eat bacon and butter and buckets of cheese. Okay? I want to smoke Cuban cigars the size of Cincinnati in the nonsmoking section. I want to run through the streets naked with green Jell-O all over my body reading Playboy magazine. Why? Because I might suddenly feel the need to. Okay, pal? — Denis Leary

You ever wonder when god's coming back with a lot of barbecue sauce? — Chuck Palahniuk

My family barbecued a lot; good barbecue is more complicated than you think. — Manish Dayal

It's hot as a barbecue the smog is pressed up against the foothills so that you can't even see them. everyone is irritated, but noone argues because noone can breathe. i laid on the couch in my bikini and watched His Girl Friday. I have decided that i will be a journalist like Josland Russel (in the movie) and not take any flak for anyone unless they look and act like Cary Grant. — Kelly Easton

I smelled barbecue before I reached the house, and that made me madder than ever, because I really love barbecue. — Rick Riordan

The question is not whether we will barbecue, but how we will barbecue. — Joan Z. Borysenko

Daddy had a strict rule about firearms. Anything we killed we had to eat. No amount of barbecue sauce would make a hairy guy like you palatable. — Diane Kelly

At least she'd finally figured out why the green leggings she wore were called tights. It was because they were tight. Extremely tight. So very tight that she felt like a sausage about to split open on a blazing hot barbecue grill. — Joanne Fluke

I have the restaurant, too. I serve Southwest, barbecue. — Mickey Gilley

Southern barbecue is the closest thing we have in the U.S. to Europe's wines or cheeses; drive a hundred miles and the barbecue changes. — John Shelton Reed

What are you talking about? Are you for real? (Nick)
What do you mean? The Simi's not turning invisible again, is she? Ooo, that would be bad. I promised akri I wouldn't do that no more in public places. But sometimes the Simi can't help it. Kind of like putting barbecue sauce on salads. It's just mandatory and reflexive 'cause you gots to kill the taste of the ick rabbit food. (Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I'd have no trouble being the barbecue kingpin of America. I'd just add it to all the other things I am: jazz musician, carpenter, architect, engineer and revolutionary. — Bobby Seale

We sat around and I fed them barbecue and whiskey. And pretty soon everyone started to compete with each other on the guitars. It seemed the more everyone drank and ate, the more everyone got into it. — Gary Allan

In Canada, you can't even have a barbecue in your backyard without being attacked by a moose or even a grizzly bear. Then again, the grizzlies don't beat anyone here in Vancouver; oh, it's true, it's true. — Kurt Angle

Some guys smoke. Some guys drink. Some guys chase women.
I'm a big barbecue-sauce guy. — Rick Majerus

Do you like kids?
Only with barbecue sauce. — Eileen Cook

On 'Friday,' I had a big trailer, and we would have a barbecue going and music playing. It was a fun set. There was too much involved for 'The Hangover' to be a fun set. They're trying to get money. — Mike Epps

Samuel Vimes dreamed about Clues. He had a jaundiced view of Clues. He instinctively distrusted them. They got in the way. And he distrusted the kind of person who'd take one look at another man and say in a lordly voice to his companion, "Ah, my dear sir, I can tell you nothing except that he is a left-handed stonemason who has spent some years in the merchant navy and has recently fallen on hard times," and then unroll a lot of supercilious commentary about calluses and stance and the state of a man's boots, when exactly the same comments could apply to a man who was wearing his old clothes because he'd been doing a spot of home bricklaying for a new barbecue pit, and had been tattooed once when he was drunk and seventeen* and in fact got seasick on a wet pavement. What arrogance! What an insult to the rich and chaotic variety of the human experience! — Terry Pratchett

Of course Americans celebrate Independence Day as opposed to Yorktown Day. Who wants to barbecue a hot dog and ponder how we owe our independence to the French navy? Who wants to twirl sparklers and dwell on how the French government's expenditures in America contributed to the bankruptcy that sparked the French Revolution that would send Rochambeau to prison, Lafayette into exile (then prison), and our benefactor His Most Christian Majesty Louis XVI to the guillotine. — Sarah Vowell

pleasant-enough place, as cemeteries went, and if somebody had told him that he'd be buried there, after a life of, say, a hundred forty years and much more sex and barbecue, he would have been content with the prospect. — John Sandford

Picnics in the park with you: barbecue and miscue. — Dan Adams

I use ginger like garlic. I love it for steaming fish and making barbecue sauces or roasted chicken. — Tom Douglas

Every year, I do a New Year's day party at my home. I invite my staff and my friends and their kids. Around 40-50 people come by, and I do a barbecue and salads, steak and sushi, and also lots of cheese. — Nobu Matsuhisa

After the welcome home barbecue, Candice had said, People here aren't that different, they just have accents. But if she could hear this, how their plan was being twisted, it would rock her little white-girl world, as Louis had always called it. — T. Geronimo Johnson

I imagined that at the end of the line there would be a door that opened into a beam of light. Welcome to fat-guy heaven. Come on in! There's always an NFL game on. The beer is free. You don't have to wake up tomorrow. You have no responsibilities. And you can eat all the barbecue you want in the middle of a gas station. — Jim Gaffigan

Apparently, Stephen Hunter does a fantastic barbecue lamb. — Peter Hambleton

Look, I made a commitment to corn 17 years ago. Sure, I'm a man. I like to go to a barbecue and see beans that I like: baked beans, red beans, black beans, big plump garbanzos. But in the end, I always come home to my sweet, sweet corn. — George Lopez

I love cooking. I like to make lasagna - it's authentic Italian-style. I also do a great chicken recipe for a barbecue. — Sullivan Stapleton

There is no difference between sitting around the pit watching dogs fight and sitting around a summer barbecue roasting the corpses of tortured animals or enjoying the dairy or eggs from tortured animals. — Gary L. Francione

And still she felt more confident at the prospect of taking on the Russian Mafia than she did attending a backyard barbecue. — Nora Roberts

When you think about a barbecue, most people think of slabs of ribs, but you don't need to do that in today's culinary barbecue world. Short ribs, barbecue chicken, skewered shrimp, vegetable kebabs, lobster mac and cheese with or without the lobster, and a donut bread pudding for dessert that's absolutely amazing. These are things that are safe whether you're a novice or a professional. Be creative and stay within your culinary pantheon. — G. Garvin

That's because I didn't have to work with Madea. I only had to work with Madea once, and that was at the barbecue and I didn't have to get close to her. — Shemar Moore

Oh Lord please don't burn us don't kill or toast your flock. Don't put us on the barbecue or simmer us in stock. Don't bake or baste or boil us or stir-fry us in a wok. — Graham Chapman

If you threw a barbecue yesterday for the Memorial weekend, it was 29 percent more expensive than last year because Barack Obama's policies have led to groceries going up 29 percent. — Michele Bachmann

We are burning like a chicken wing left on the grill of an outdoor barbecue
we are unwanted and burning we are burning and unwanted
we are
an unwanted
burning
as we sizzle and fry
to the bone
the coals of Dante's 'Inferno' spit and sputter beneath
us
and
above the sky is an open hand
and
the words of wise men are useless
it's not a nice world, a nice world it's
not ... — Charles Bukowski

You don't really mean that about having everyone leave you alone," she said sweetly. "You seem like such a friendly and outgoing guy. I'll make sure to mention how great you are to everyone over the next couple of days. Before you know it, the whole street will be knocking on your door and introducing themselves. It won't be a month before you're hosting the neighborhood barbecue. You'll also be picking up prescriptions, mowing lawns and eating macaroni salad with every meal so you won't hurt their feelings." She batted her eyelashes at him as he seemed to pale before her eyes. "Welcome to the neighborhood. — Liliana Hart

Comfort is key for a barbecue. — Ashley Madekwe

I think I can capture the taste buds of the average right-wing conservative who loves barbecue. — Bobby Seale

He hadn't moved. All the crazy-hot activity in the kitchen - waitresses going in and out, cooks going back and forth, the constant thump of barbecue being hand-chopped - and he was so still. She had to quickly turn away. Staring at an Alexander man too long was like staring at the sun. The image became imprinted. You could close your eyes and still see him. — Sarah Addison Allen

People called me a hoodlum and a thug. But they didn't tell you I was a carpenter, an architect, a stand-up comic - even a bartender. And a barbecue cook. But they didn't tell you that. — Bobby Seale

Adults are always telling young people, 'These are the best years of your life.' Are they? I don't know. Sometimes when adults say this to children I look into their faces. They look like someone on the top seat of the Ferris wheel who has had too much cotton candy and barbecue. They'd like to get off and be sick but everyone keeps telling them what a good time they're having. — Erma Bombeck

The price of barbecue is eternal vigilance. — Thomas Jefferson

I actually got discovered in my hometown of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania by a man who worked at a place that sold barbecue sandwiches! — George Benson

I met a new girl at a barbecue, very pretty, a blond I think. I don't know, her hair was on fire, and all she talked about was herself. You know these kind of girls: 'I'm hot. I'm on fire. Me, me, me.' You know. 'Help me, put me out.' Come on, could we talk about me just a little bit? — Garry Shandling

Is that a cow?"
Harley laughed out loud. "What do you suppose our barbecue-loving Texas friends are going to say to that?"
"Actually," Sasha said, "I'll be more interested in what our friends from Bangalore will say to what our Texas friends will say. — David S.Goyer

Barbecue sauce is like a beautiful woman. If it's too sweet, it's bound to be hiding something. — Lyle Lovett

There's no Texas barbecue as good as Fort Worth barbecue, — Stephen King

When I tour, it's like, well, like a food tour as much as a comedy tour. I try to eat at all the weird places, the obscure barbecue joints, burger places. There are a few spots in L.A. that I'm obsessed with - one of them is the Taco Zone taco truck on Alvarado. There are secret off-menu items that are amazing. — Aziz Ansari

Tell him to leave me alone, Astrid. Else I'll have to barbecue him and make akri angry at me. I don't want to make akri angry. (Simi)
Simi? Is that you? (Astrid)
Yes. C'est moi. The little demon with hornays. (Simi) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

The nourishment from barbecue is palatable. — Millard Fillmore

Barbecue is the good old technique of people making a fire and putting some stuff over the top - I mean, look at the S'more: it's just got a stick. A lot of those goofy toys, it's people who are looking at things to do. I think if you focus on the food, at the most you need tongs or a spoon to flip something; that's about it. — Graham Elliot

One thing any DJ needs in his crate, especially at a barbecue, is a selection of 15-minute-plus jams. — Adam Mansbach

We don't really want to work for a corporation; however, we do aspire to one day make a barbecue sauce that doubles as a cologne, and we would like to promote that ourselves. We would like to create a cologne barbecue sauce benchmark of success. — Charles Lincoln Neal

He darted a guilty look toward his dad. "Will you - get me a bottle of spicy?"
My eyes jerked to his.
"Maybe some barbecue sauce?"
I closed my mouth before a bug flew into it. "Sure." I did not believe this. I was pimping ketchup to the son of the FIB's captain. — Kim Harrison

Like the blind man said as he wandered into a cannibal village ...
Alright! The country fair must be right up ahead. I smell barbecue! — John Rachel

I love how the men stand around cooking the barbie while the women have done all the work beforehand doing the marinade and making the salads and then everybody says, 'what a great barbie' to the guy cooking. A barbecue is just the ultimate blokes' pastime, isn't it? — Curtis Stone

Barbecue may not be the road to world peace, but it's a start. — Anthony Bourdain

Anyway, like I was saying, shrimp is the fruit of the sea. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, sautes it. There's, um, shrimp ka-bobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan-fried, deep-fried, stir-fried. There's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich ... That's, that's about it. — Mykelti Williamson

4. THE CRUMBLING WALL

(Hamburger, prepared medium well, with bacon and barbecue sauce. Courtesy of that place on Solano, where, it should be mentioned, they use much too much barbecue sauce, which anyone should know has the almost immediate effect of soaking the bun, the bun becoming like oatmeal, inedible, the burger ruined, all in a matter of minutes--so quick that even when the burger is picked up and patrons attempt to save the bun ('Separate them! Quick! Get the bun away from the sauce! Now scrape! Scrape!'), it's always too late, necessitating the keeping, at home, of a stash of replacement buns, which are then toasted, heavily, to provide maximum resistance to the sauce's degenerative effects. Served with potatoes of the French kind, and fruit, as above. — Dave Eggers

I am a big barbecue-sauce guy. — Rick Majerus

I turned vegetarian after 9/11. A friend of mine came back from New York and said that he couldn't stand the smell of burnt flesh. It immediately reminded me of a barbecue. — Alyssa Milano

I won't give up what I enjoy to look perfect. I want to find a happy medium between feeling good about my body and still having a beer and some barbecue. — Miranda Lambert

I try to avoid barbecue potato chips. They're my weakness. — Gwyneth Paltrow

And the reason you've never heard of my favorite drink is barbecue you're probably an uptight coffeehouse, double-espresso, no-sugar kind of guy?" "I'm miserably transparent, huh?" "No. I'm a coffee psychic. You have that bitter double-espresso look about you. But today you're joining up with the masses and getting a Coolatta. — Jessica Park

I have opinions about the differences between Memphis barbecue and Texas barbecue. Put me in the kitchen and you'll see how Southern I can be. — Chris Hardwick

A lot of it comes from tiny things, like not eating barbecue sauce with my pizza at two in the morning. I think it's all a manifestation of being happy and wanting to treat myself well. The truth is, I'm not getting up an hour earlier and walking on a treadmill. I have the greatest workout partner in the world. And you don't need a gym membership for that kind of workout. — Jason Sudeikis