Attending Funeral Quotes & Sayings

By contrast, a schoolteacher in North Carolina recounted the story of a sick black woman preparing for death. She gave the teacher her will, plans for a funeral and a grave, and insurance policies, requesting that she look after them. When the teacher asked her if she wanted to see her husband, who had deserted her, she replied, "No, and if you ever hear from him, tell him I don't leave him even a good wish." She then displayed an envelope, containing what she called her most prized possession, and handed it to the teacher for safekeeping. "When I am gone, no one will care about this envelope. Will you promise to keep it, so I will know I am not all gone so soon?" The envelope contained college credits she had accumulated after attending night school while working all day. 2 — Leon F. Litwack

Weapons are the tools of violence;all decent men detest them.Weapons are the tools of fear;a decent man will avoid themexcept in the direst necessityand, if compelled, will use themonly with the utmost restraint.Peace is his highest value.If the peace has been shattered,how can he be content?His enemies are not demons,but human beings like himself.He doesn't wish them personal harm.Nor does he rejoice in victory.How could he rejoice in victoryand delight in the slaughter of men?He enters a battle gravely,with sorrow and with great compassion,as if he were attending a funeral — Laozi

I count too heavily on birthdays, though I know I shouldn't. Inevitably I begin to assess my life by them, figure out how I'm doing by how many people remember; it's like the old fantasy of attending your own funeral: You get to see who your friends are, get to see who shows up. — Lorrie Moore

Do not bring your dog. (advice for attending a funeral) — Mark Twain

Boros is not with the team today because he's attending his daughter's funeral. Oh, wait, it's her wedding. — Jerry Coleman

I have a hat. It is graceful and feminine and give me a certain dignity, as if I were attending a state funeral or something. Someday I may get up enough courage to wear it, instead of carrying it. — Erma Bombeck

For the next few minutes, I made great shots until a creepy biker guy stood too close and I missed. Cooper took the stick and studied the remaining balls.
"Don't cry when I beat your ass."
"Hell yeah," the biker said, laughing. "Some girls just love it rough."
Giving me a quick glance, Cooper glared at the guy. "Who the fuck are you?"
"I know your pop."
"Good for you, but if you don't back off and stop skeeving out my girl, my pop and I will be attending your funeral. — Bijou Hunter

Put no inscription over the grave, except the date of my birth and my death; and, wherever I am buried, let the funeral be perfectly private, with as few persons attending, and as little show and expense as possible. — Isaac Butt

I seldom go into a natural history museum without feeling as if I were attending a funeral. — John Burroughs

Misery is when you always seem to be getting dressed in black to go to a funeral.
Misery is when you get there and realize that the person who is dead is another close friend.
Misery is when you look around and all your friends are crying.
Misery is when you hear them say they'll try to stop and stay away from this stuff.
Misery is when the next day you see them stocking up in White Clay for a party soon to come.
Misery is whenyou hear the sirens, and you have to sit and wonder whose funeral you'll be attending for the next few days.
Misery is when you realize they'll never stop,
and you'll always be choosing black clothing for the next day.

(Kayla Matthews, student) — Timothy P. McLaughlin